SMW 42

“Fruit and rice cakes are up, meat and fish are done, chestnuts and jujubes are okay. Now I just need to scoop out the rice and soup.”

“What about the alcohol?”

“I put it under the table. I should light the candles now. Did you finish writing the jiban?”

“It’s here.”

Having finished his preparations and changed into a hanbok, Choi Seol walked toward me holding the rectangular piece of hanji paper with the ancestral tablet written on it. Every time he moved, the rustling sound of the deep blue silk robe added a layer of elegance. Of course, even without such effects, Choi Seol in a hanbok was perfect.

“Aren’t you going to take it?”

“Thanks. By the way, the hanbok really suits you.”

As I took the jiban and showered him with praise, Choi Seol furrowed his brows as if feeling awkward.

“Did I really have to wear this too?”

“There needs to be someone helping by my side.”

“Can’t we just take a photo of the memorial table and send it?”

“They want me to film the whole process of the ceremony. They said they want to watch it all together.”

Choi Seol raised an eyebrow at this news, which he was hearing for the first time.

“Is that why your uncle called earlier?”

“I told you, he first suggested a video call. They were supposed to go to the beach, but it’s raining, so they’re all at the lodging now. Since they’re gathered, he insisted—absolutely insisted—that he wanted to watch the ceremony in real-time, so we reached a compromise.”

In the process, Choi Seol had been painted as a very shy and timid young man, but since my protests had fallen on deaf ears, it couldn’t be helped.

“If you’re uncomfortable with your face being on camera, do you want to wear a satgat? There’s one in the closet.”

“Why on earth is something like that in the house?”

“Why else? Doesn’t every Korean household have at least one traditional hat?”

“…….”

“I’m joking. My eldest aunt runs a traditional hanbok shop. That’s why all the hanboks on my unauthorized copymother’s side were made there. unauthorized copyIsn’t it cool? I think traditional styles are more luxurious and better than the modern ones these days. My aunt specially lent this to me because she said a friend is spending the holiday with her.”

I was certain that after watching the video later, my aunt would say that sending a hanbok to Choi Seol was the best thing she had ever done in her life. Indeed, Choi Seol in traditional hanbok exuded the aura of a crown prince you’d only see in a historical drama. I felt a surge of pride, wondering if I had become a ‘successful fan’ if there were such a thing as stanning a first love.

“Ah, of course, if you don’t want to appear in the video, don’t worry—I’ll mosaic you out when I edit and send it later. I already told my uncle.”

“That doesn’t matter. It’s just awkward because it feels so formal.”

“Mm-hmm, it’s not awkward at all. I’m telling you, you look really cool.”

I gave him a thumbs-up, but I had to lower it quickly under Choi Seol’s intense gaze. Was that not the right reaction?

“Anyway, since we’re doing the ancestral rites, it’s better to look pretty.”

“For whom?”

“Obviously for our grandmother, who would be delighted to see your… appearance? Hahaha. My grandma really loved handsome looks just like yours.”

That was a close call.

For the record, my grandmother usually said she detested guys who looked like ‘gisaeng boys’—meaning pretty boys. She said they were the worst because they’d constantly be surrounded by women and cause nothing but heartache. That’s why she used to say someone like me was just the right amount of charming and pretty. Of course, the celebrities she could never take her eyes off of on TV were all of Choi Seol’s type, but still, I believed her firmly. But suddenly, did some dust get in my eye? Why am I tearing up?

Regardless, my ambitiously prepared plan couldn’t be discovered here, so I only hoped Choi Seol would [unauthorized copy]be Read on Read BL Novelsfooled. Though, since he’s quick-witted, he’s exactly the kind of guy who might doubt my perfect acting.

“That’s a relief. I wanted to make a good impression on your grandmother too.”

Was he fooled? Seeing his face suddenly brighten as if a spotlight had hit him, it seemed he didn’t suspect anything. Though, I wasn’t sure if that was something to be so happy about.

A sudden realization struck me. I see. He was thinking of his own grandmother. My heart twinged. Now that it had come to this, my only thought was to finish the uncle’s mission quickly and move on to the next step.

I neatly placed the jiban Choi Seol had handed me into the tablet holder and arranged them in order on the front row of the memorial table. On the jiban, the names of the grandmother and grandfather were written in a calligraphy as upright and neat as Choi Seol’s heart.

“It’s 11:40 now, so we’ll barely make it before twelve.”

I checked the time and pressed the record button on the phone set up on the tripod.

“Let’s pay our respects now.”

Since there were only two of us performing the rites, the process reached its end quickly. Checking the time, it was just before twelve. After finishing the final two bows, I hurriedly sent the video of the ceremony to my uncle.

“The file size is too big, so I’ll have to send it in two parts.”

“Do you know how to edit?”

“Apps are so convenient these days, it’s quick.”

Once I finished sending all the videos to my uncle, I instinctively let out three cheers of ‘Manse!’

“Finally, the mission is over!”

Then, as I turned around excitedly, I met a gaze that looked as if he were seeing something strange.

“Why? Ah, is this your first time seeing something like this?”

When I asked, pointing to the app screen that was still open, Choi Seol immediately turned serious.

“I may have lost my memories, but I haven’t become an idiot. And smartphones existed ten years ago too.”

“True, you only used the latest phones back then. I guess it’s not that surprising.”

Looking back, although Choi Seol was confused about the situation of losing his memories, he was calm regarding his surroundings. That made me wonder. What exactly is lost when one loses their memories? At the very least, it was clear that knowledge, skills, or a person’s habits were not what disappeared.

“You remember all that?”

Choi Seol asked. I tilted my head, as he seemed somewhat surprised.

“What?”

“That I used the latest phones.”

I immediately frowned.

“You’re the one who lost your memories, not me.”

“Usually, people don’t remember what phone someone used ten years ago.”

Usually, they don’t. But for me, these weren’t ordinary memories. And for you, Choi Seol, they wouldn’t have been either.

“I just remembered. Back then, you were the only one in class who used the latest phone.”

“Was that so?”

“It was.”

I felt like I understood what it meant to lose one’s memories. Memories, people, and the heart.

“What do we do now?”

Whatever it was, I was certainly not among the things Choi Seol [unauthorized copy]needed to recover. [visit our site]Because our visit our sitetime had stopped at seventeen.

“Now we have to burn the jiban. That way, the two of them can go back on their way.”

I had asked the question to avoid the subject, but Choi Seol accepted it without much suspicion. It was a relief that there were still things left to hear from him, having memorized the entire order of the ceremony. I gathered the jiban with the grandmother and grandfather’s names. The letters, so neat and even that one would believe they were typed, gave off a strong impression that gripped the viewer.

“The calligraphy is so beautiful, it’s a waste to burn it.”

At the words that escaped my lips unconsciously, Choi Seol chuckled.

“Thanks if that’s a compliment. But I’m not sure if it was okay for a complete stranger like me to write them.”

“What does it matter? If you put it that way, the food on the memorial table was all made by people from other houses too. And the ancestors probably would have wanted you as a descendant more than me. If I were about thirty years older, I would’ve adopted you.”

“What would you do by adopting me?”

“I feel like you’d send me to a very high-end silver town.”

“Isn’t that a bit too early for a wish?”

“Living through it, time flies. You woke up and suddenly you’ve aged ten years.”

“I think this is a bit different from that.”

“It’s similar. This is how you turn thirty and then eighty. That’s why you have to prepare for retirement in bits and pieces starting now. It’s not like anyone’s going to take responsibility for me anyway.”

“Aren’t you going to get married?”

“I’m a lost cause in this life.”

“…….”

I picked up the candle that had been lit on the memorial table and held the jiban over the flame. It caught fire quickly and blazed up.

“My name will probably never be written like this and burned. Nor do I wish for it.”

Since dead people have no bodies, they need a place for their soul to dwell to descend to earth. The name written on the jiban served as a substitute for the body. Ultimately, it meant there had to be someone to remember and call them, a bond I would never have in my life.

“You never know. There might be at least one person in the world who misses you.”

Was that a flirt? It was a cliché, almost tired line, but coming from Choi Seol, it somehow stirred my heart. Whether ten years ago or now, my taste in people who make me waver remained consistent. Trying to hide it, my voice came out light.

“I don’t think that’s something a person who said moping over dead people doesn’t suit their temperament should say.”

He must have remembered saying that on the mountain, as he let out a small laugh.

“Even so, the human heart doesn’t always do as it’s told. No matter what anyone says, those who miss someone will miss them, and those who grieve will have to grieve.”

“What is that? In the end, you’re saying you’re still sad.”

“Is that so?”

Choi Seol muttered, staring at the remaining ashes of the burned jiban.

“I suppose it is.”

Because he had been so blatant with me, I thought he was honest with his emotions, but seeing him like this, that wasn’t always the case. I had thought the seventeen-year-old Choi Seol was simply strong. Perhaps because I was equally young back then, I couldn’t see it. So I thought it was a relief. At least the current me had the intuition to notice Choi Seol’s tender inner side.

That’s why I could come up with a plan like this.

“Stay here for a second. Don’t eat the food yet.”

Leaving the puzzled Choi Seol behind, I hurried into the room. I came back out with a box that had been tightly wrapped in a cloth and handed it to him.

“Open it.”

“What is this?”

To Choi Seol, who asked the question while holding the box he had received instinctively, I responded with a smile instead of an answer. Eventually forced to open the box, Choi Seol paused upon seeing the items inside. His sharp eyes slowly widened, and soon, his pupils wavered as he looked at me.

“This is…….”

“Park Bong-hee, Choi Ga-eul. Those are your maternal grandmother’s and mother’s names, right?”

Choi Seol shifted his gaze from me to the names written on the two tablets in the box, checking them again. After chewing over the names several times, he finally nodded after a long while.

“That’s right. But why is this…….”

“Why else? It’s so you can pay your respects to your grandmother and mother too.”

The eyes looking at me wavered once more. He was visibly flustered.