Chapter 130 – GOY 130
#130
I now understand what Joo Seung-hyuk meant. If it hadn’t been for the Bracelet of Roitalraum, I might have run away halfway through.
I had heard that when a Rut Cycle occurs, Alphas are dominated by their pheromones and their behavior becomes aggressive.
But this was different from simply being aggressive.
Joo Seung-hyuk, having entered his Rut Cycle, lost his reason. Forgetting everything else, he craved me incessantly. His instincts wanted and desired me as if no matter how much he was filled, it was never enough.
Even within the wordless conversation of our bodies, his desperate longing was felt poignantly.
Amidst emotions, sensations, and a heat so intense they were nearly unbearable, we entwined our bodies continuously.
And at some point, I lost consciousness.
My entire body sank heavily, as if submerged in water. But I wasn’t afraid. The black waves enveloping me felt warm and cozy.
Feeling a serene comfort I had never experienced before, I opened my eyes to see pitch-black pupils.
“Seung-hyuk-ah….”
“Hyung!”
Joo Seung-hyuk gripped my hand tightly. His expression was dark. Moreover, he looked like he had lost weight compared to before the Rut started. Seeing him still looking so haggard, a sudden surge of worry rose within me.
“Seung-hyuk-ah, are you okay?”
“Is this the time to be worrying about me?”
He let out a hollow laugh. He seemed to be doing okay, but I couldn’t let my guard down. The image of him collapsed in the kitchen was still vivid before my eyes.
“Is the Rut over?”
“Yes.”
“I see….”
Thinking back, it was a foolish question. During the Rut, Joo Seung-hyuk had been engulfed in such intense heat that proper communication was nearly impossible. The fact that we could have a normal conversation like this meant he had emerged from the Rut Cycle.
Furthermore, Joo Seung-hyuk was dressed. Seeing that I was also wearing blue pajamas of the same design, it seemed Joo Seung-hyuk had dressed me.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“I should have taken care of you, but I must have fallen asleep without realizing it. How pathetic of me… ugh!”
Suddenly, Joo Seung-hyuk pulled my lip outward.
“What’s so pathetic? Don’t say things like that.”
“But you were in Rut, and I was fine….”
Because of the Rut Cycle, Joo Seung-hyuk’s pheromones had been unstable. On top of that, his physical condition was poor due to the excessive intake of suppressants.
I had intended to take him to the hospital once his Rut calmed down, but because I fainted first, I ended up being the one taken care of.
“It’s the opposite. You’re the one who suffered because of me, Hyung.”
“No. I’m fine. By the way, did you go to the hospital?”
“No.”
“Go quickly.”
“I’m perfectly fine, so don’t worry.”
“Still. You collapsed.”
“That’s because I was suppressing my pheromones. I let them all out, so I’m okay. You’re the one who went through a lot because of me.”
Joo Seung-hyuk stroked my face. The touch brushing against my cheek was cautious.
“No. I’m okay.”
“You can be honest. It was hard, wasn’t it?”
“…A little.”
Honestly, it was truly exhausting. To the point where even twitching a finger, let alone shaking my head, felt burdensome. I couldn’t even imagine lifting my body or moving my waist.
“That’s a relief. If you’re this exhausted, you won’t be able to run away.”
‘Is that all you have to say! Who do you think made me like this! I couldn’t even sleep for three whole days, and you say that!’
The moment I heard his words, [visit our site]anger erupted, but visit our siteI couldn’t show it outwardly, so I cursed him with my eyes instead.
“But you have a look on your face like you want to run away right now. If you were fine, you would have said something mean about returning to the dormitory.”
He really is sharp. If I were fine, I would have left immediately after confirming Joo Seung-hyuk was healthy. If I had any strength in my legs, I would have bolted for the dorms.
If we did it just one more time, I might actually die, so for the sake of my own life, I had to get out of this house.
As I kept my mouth shut, Joo Seung-hyuk gave a gentle smile and kissed my forehead.
“You worked hard. And thank you.”
“…No. I’m the one who’s sorry.”
“What are you sorry for now?”
“If I had been an Omega, it would have been easier for you….”
They say that when an Alpha and an Omega spend a cycle together, their pheromones interact. Since both are enveloped in [Read on Read BL Novels]pheromones while [unauthorized copy]engaging [unauthorized copy]in the relationship, the physical and mental burden is lower, and pheromonal stability is achieved more quickly.
It is said that this is the period when Alpha-Beta or Beta-Omega couples are most likely to break up. After spending a cycle, one party notifies the other of their breakup.
People usually say it’s because the Alpha or Omega feels a deficiency in the Beta, or because the Beta cannot handle it physically.
But having experienced it myself, that wasn’t everything.
While the physical toll was hard, a sense of self-loathing regarding my trait flooded over me throughout the Rut Cycle.
I felt sorry for being a Beta. I felt that being a Beta was a deficiency, and that my very existence was something wrong.
Until now, I had lived satisfied with my own trait. I liked being a Beta, and I had never wanted to manifest as an Omega. Despite that, a wave of misery washed over me as if I were a sinner.
If I had been an Omega, Joo Seung-hyuk would have been more comfortable. His pheromones would have calmed down quickly, and the Rut Cycle would have ended sooner. In the first place, there would have been no reason to take suppressants.
Even if Joo Seung-hyuk had taken medication, I would have noticed. Taking suppressants doesn’t make pheromones disappear completely, so I would have noticed that subtle change. However, as a Beta, I couldn’t feel his pheromones.
I hadn’t noticed in the slightest that Joo Seung-hyuk was stubbornly taking suppressants out of [unauthorized copy]worry for me. If I had been an Omega, this wouldn’t have happened.
How pathetic….
“Don’t think like that. I liked it. It’s just that I wasn’t in my right mind because of the pheromones. I was worried that Hyung would find that scary and difficult.”
If we had been an Alpha and an Omega, we would have both lost our reason and entwined our bodies during the cycle. But my consciousness remained clear. That didn’t mean I was afraid of Joo Seung-hyuk, who craved me while engulfed in passion. However, one thing weighed on my mind.
“…You, you knotted.”
Throughout the Rut, instinct preceded reason for Joo Seung-hyuk, and he continuously attempted to knot.
But for me, a Beta, knotting held no special meaning. My body felt a bit strained, but that was all….
“I guess Alphas really should be paired with Omegas….”
As I murmured, drenched in a sense of helplessness, Joo Seung-hyuk lightly pinched my cheek.
“You’re a fool. It’s not because you’re a Beta or an Omega, [Read on Read BL Novels]but because you’re Lee Yeon-soo that I wanted to knot.”
“But….”
“I was happy that Hyung stayed by my side.”
Joo Seung-hyuk interlaced his fingers with mine and met my eyes.
“Until now, Ruts were terrible. They were so painful and disgusting that I felt like I would go crazy whenever that time came. But after spending it with another person for the first time—and with Hyung, no less—this thing called a Rut felt quite alright. No, it was actually really great.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Every moment felt like a dream.”
A shy smile played on his face.
“Was it really your first time…?”
“Yes.”
He looked straight into my eyes. Truth was contained within those unwavering black pupils.
“I’m your first?”
“Yes. Dating, sex, Rut—everything is a first. I’m doing everything for the first time with Hyung.”
Joo Seung-hyuk really was experiencing everything for the first time with me. I could now completely believe the words I had previously doubted.
“Is it okay that I’m your first?”
“Where do you get such a stupid question? Of course it’s great. You have no idea how happy I am.”
“But I’m not an Omega.”
“It doesn’t matter. I only need Hyung.”
Our lips met. It was a soft and sweet kiss, not one covered in desire.
A refreshing yet cool scent brushed past the tip of my nose. Did he put on perfume after showering?
Feeling the unfamiliar but pleasant scent, I accepted his kiss.
When I first spent the Rut, I thought I would be collapsed in bed for a month because it was so hard. However, I recovered my strength much sooner than expected.
I don’t know if it’s because of the ‘Bracelet of Roitalraum’ or thanks to Joo Seung-hyuk’s care.
“Seung-hyuk-ah, I can eat by myself.”
“Just until today.”
Joo Seung-hyuk blew on the abalone porridge and fed it to me.
“Only until today.”
“Yes.”
After the Rut Cycle ended, I didn’t lift a single finger. This was because Joo Seung-hyuk did everything—feeding me, washing me, and even dressing me. He had taken care of me meticulously before, but never to this extent.
At first, I was embarrassed, but my body was so exhausted that I just let him. But as they say, humans are creatures of adaptation. Now, even the feeling of embarrassment was gradually disappearing.
“Seung-hyuk-ah, you should eat too.”
“Hyung eats first.”
Today as well, he fed me the porridge until the very end.
“By the way, who makes this?”
“Why?”
“Because it’s delicious.”
It was more delicious than any abalone porridge I had ever eaten.
At first, I thought he had ordered it. But for delivery food, it had an incredible amount of abalone. It could have been a special order by Joo Seung-hyuk, but it was always piping hot, never cooling down as if it had been brought by a delivery motorcycle. Moreover, the side dishes were neat, and above all, the taste was similar to the food I had eaten when I was confined in the basement.
It was likely the work of the same chef. However, no trace of any other person could be found in this house.
Of course, since I hardly leave this room, I can’t be certain, but it didn’t seem like anyone else had been coming and going.
“I’m glad. I was worried it might not suit your taste since I made it.”
“You did?!”
“Why are you so surprised?”
Joo Seung-hyuk chuckled.
“Did you really make this?”
I asked again because I couldn’t believe it, and he gave a light nod.
“Yes.”
“Then did you make that oxtail soup too?”
“Yes. I made it to give to Hyung.”
To think that all the various dishes that had brightened my confinement life were all Joo Seung-hyuk’s handiwork….
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