55 – I Never Ran Away

Chapter 55 I Never Ran Away

“I’m going to kill you?”

Gritting his teeth, Xie Qingcheng forced the words out through the gaps in his teeth.

“You’re not stupid, after all. Is that why you ran away like that?”

It was a surprise attack that exceeded expectations. The gap in the emotions Xie Qingcheng had barely managed to stabilize while pretending to be composed widened, and the cowardly boy hidden within peeked out.

In an instant, the smile vanished from He Yu’s face. His complexion turned faintly pale.

“I told you, I never ran away!”

“Is that so?”

“…I never ran away. I just… I just…”

“Just?”

“…”

Xie Qingcheng narrowed his eyes, pressing him relentlessly.

“You just happened to wake up a bit early this morning, and after getting dressed, you felt refreshed and the weather looked nice, so you went out for a jog to clear your head? You blocked your one-night stand’s contact because you were worried they’d be clingy, and you were so satisfied as you left that you forgot to pay the bill? Is that it?”

“…”

Now, He Yu’s face turned a muddy color, like someone who had swallowed poison.

“You’re a real piece of trash, He Yu. You’re just a piece of trash who fucks people and bolts.”

Pale with shock, He Yu glared at Xie Qingcheng. His face was a mottled mess of embarrassment, anger, a bit of unfairness, and humiliation.

“I said I didn’t run away! I came back and paid as soon as I answered the phone!”

At those words, Xie Qingcheng flared up in turn.

“Do you have no conscience? Who begged you to pay? If it weren’t for this… I would never have had to see your face again in my life!”

Xie Qingcheng meant it. If he had had 1.68 million yuan on his card, he would have rather paid the club expenses himself than ever call this bastard. To begin with, as a proper adult man, it was unacceptable to a traditionalist like him to ask a student to pay.

Enraged, Xie Qingcheng did nothing but pour out curses.

He Yu did not back down, glaring back at him with a face flushing red and blue.

Both unconsciously lowered their voices, but the air, sharpened like a blade, could not be hidden.

The employee who had just helped with the payment watched the two from a distance at the information desk, eventually squinting and glaring at Xie Qingcheng.

Crazy. A grown man gets 1.68 million yuan from a young master for a one-night stand, and why is he making the young master feel wronged again?

That guy is absolute trash that can’t even be recycled!

A long standoff ensued. He Yu swallowed his anger. He didn’t even feel like talking back anymore. He steadied his breathing and did his best to collect his emotions.

“So, what exactly do you want to do?”

His voice sounded irritated.

“Since we’re already here, do you want to ask the information desk to borrow a knife and kill me in one stroke?”

Sarcastic and blatant, He Yu looked Xie Qingcheng straight in the eye with a menacing gaze.

“Kill you in one stroke?”

Xie Qingcheng scoffed.

“How naive. I was planning to dissect you, slicing away piece by piece.”

Receiving the expected [Read on Read BL Novels]answer, He Read on Read BL NovelsYu let out a small laugh. His eyes were still red and his complexion pale.

“Fine… fine. Do whatever you want.”

He Yu muttered repeatedly.

“Do whatever you want. If there’s something you want, just say it. I don’t care if you dissect me alive or commit posthumous execution. Honestly, life doesn’t mean much to me. Whether I live or die, I’m someone who isn’t even treated like a human being.”

As he continued, the corners of He Yu’s mouth curved with an emotion that was unclear whether it was satire or self-derision.

“Do you know? All this time, I believed the lies you told. I was stupid enough to believe those words and worked hard until now, only for my convictions to shatter overnight thanks to you. Honestly, I wondered how great it would have been if Lu Yuzhu had been a sharpshooter. If the bullet had hit, I wouldn’t have had to do something disgusting like yesterday.”

His pitch-black pupils rolled slowly, targeting Xie Qingcheng. A certain painful emotion lay beneath his voice.

“You think so too, don’t you? It would have been cleaner if I had died then. You wouldn’t have had to suffer through something as unlucky as this.”

“…”

The finger that had been pointing at He Yu, radiating a predatory and eerie atmosphere, stopped.

The moment Lu Yuzhu’s name was mentioned, Xie Qingcheng’s heart instinctively sank.

Whether He Yu had brought this up on purpose or not, Xie Qingcheng admitted that he owed He Yu a great debt from that day at the archives.

Amidst the surging anger and resentment, the sound of that day’s [visit our site]gunshot seemed to echo [visit our site]in his ears. The dark red blood Read on Read BL Novelsflowing from He Yu’s shoulder stung his retinas.

That hallucinatory gunshot became a vine, wrapping around and suppressing the anger Xie Qingcheng had felt while wanting to slap He Yu’s cheek.

“…He Yu.”

Eventually, Xie Qingcheng spoke, grinding his teeth. The physical and mental pain was immense. Just from having a brief conversation with He Yu, his voice was ragged and cracked.

It was a weak and cold voice.

“I assume you came here to say things like this.”

Having started, he continued.

“Fine, alright. Then listen carefully. No matter what mistakes I made, even if I quit being a doctor because I hated the risks, even if I disgraced my professor and was cursed and despised by former colleagues… you should not have done such a thing to me. You might have been disappointed because of my shortcomings, but at the very least, I never did anything shameful while treating you.”

“…”

“Think carefully about how pathetic your current behavior is.”

Xie Qingcheng took a deep breath and muttered in a wet voice, feeling a strong headache and dizziness.

“Think about it yourself.”

If the previous conversation unauthorized copy[visit our site]had simply made He Yu uncomfortable, the following words tore open an old wound.

Originally, He Yu had no intention of arguing with Xie Qingcheng. He had planned to keep quiet about the matter regarding Xie Xue. But the moment he heard those words, the string of his patience snapped. Under the gaze of numerous eyes, he dragged Xie Qingcheng into the restroom and locked the door.

“Think about it? Huh? Xie Qingcheng, what am I supposed to think about! Do you think I don’t know anything?”

He Yu’s emotions shook violently.

“I know everything! Every single thing! Delusional disorder, self-protection instinct, hallucinations. I know that most of the image of Xie Xue I remember was born from my desperate longing and imagination!”

Xie Qingcheng’s face, which already looked like a floating soul, grew even paler.

“Who do you think doesn’t know…”

A gaze of madness and a low, suppressed voice. Every single syllable he spat out slashed Xie Qingcheng’s face like a knife.

“Dr. Xie. You knew everything, yet you hid the truth. You watched me act like a fool from beginning to end. Because you were afraid I’d obsess over Xie Xue, afraid I wouldn’t accept the truth and would deny reality. That’s why you didn’t say anything and dragged out the time, warning Xie Xue to stay away from me, right?”

He Yu pressed him menacingly.

“For seven years! Even my father knew that the friend I relied on was a phantom, but I, the person actually involved, was the only one who didn’t know! I was immersed in delusions all alone, knowing nothing! You must have enjoyed watching the play all this time, didn’t you? Do you know how cruel and arrogant you are? It seems my feelings weren’t even a consideration; what exactly am I to you doctors? A partial imagination patient? A guy who mobilizes an imaginary person just to get some pathetic comfort? No one ever truly loved or worried about me. Even on birthdays I spent alone… I just fantasized about hearing ‘happy birthday’ or receiving a slice of cake.”

He Yu gripped Xie Qingcheng’s neck and glared at his cheek.

Unlike his pallid complexion, Xie Qingcheng’s skin was hot. This man’s body had been tormented by [stolen content]him all [visit our site]night. No matter how much he pretended to [unauthorized copy]be fine, the moment He Yu touched his neck, he could clearly feel the fever.

Feeling the searing heat at his fingertips, He Yu stared at him intently.

Only after a long while could He Yu hear Xie Qingcheng’s voice.

“…Even if I had the chance again, I would have acted the same way. Keeping you and Xie Xue apart, and hiding the truth from you.”

Blinded by rage, He Yu slammed Xie Qingcheng against the black tiled wall of the restroom. Thanks to the black tiles, the man’s paper-pale face stood out even more.

If the temperature touching his palm hadn’t been so hot, He Yu might have fallen into the illusion that Xie Qingcheng was made of snow and would melt away just like that.

Xie Qingcheng coughed lowly. His gaze was as cold and sharp as when he first met He Yu.

“He Yu.”

“…”

“I did it because I knew you couldn’t handle it.”

“…”

“That was the best way. Regardless of what you think, I don’t believe I did anything wrong.”

“…”

In truth, Xie Qingcheng wanted to say this: It was my fault, He Yu. Because back then, I ignored your sincerity. You opened your heart to me, took that heart in both hands and reached up on tiptoe to give it to me, but I treated you as nothing more than a patient. I failed to discover that desperate heart in your eyes, the heart that wished someone would truly be with you.

I was too indifferent back then.

That won’t happen again.

Even if I can’t be a kind person, even if I remain a stubborn and cold human until the end, even so, I want to be your legs. Because you helped me when I was standing alone on the cliff. Because you remembered the comfort and encouragement I gave as a doctor and even risked your life.

I might not be able to give you everything you want. But I think I’ll stop playing the role of a doctor. Because I want to remain as Xie Qingcheng, not as a doctor, for you.

If only you want me to.

—These were the words he had agonized over in his heart before last night.

Of course, everything had changed now.

He didn’t want to utter any of those lines. The hot body, the throbbing lower half, the dizziness blurring his vision. All of it was a shameful brand stamped onto his body by He Yu’s madness.

Those emotions, which had clearly belonged to Xie Qingcheng, seemed to have burned away completely last night.

As He Yu held his cheek, hair fell over Xie Qingcheng’s forehead. Beneath it, his eyes shone as sharp as ever. Roughly pushing He Yu away, he lit a cigarette in front of him and took a deep drag. The moment the smoke hit his throat, irritation surged. He eventually crushed the cigarette out against the tiled wall next to He Yu.

The veins in Xie Qingcheng’s neck stood out. A reddish hue began to surround his eyes.

“For the past seven years, I fulfilled my duties as a doctor. And you commit a damn act like last night for a mere reason like that? He Yu, you really are a beast, worse than a dog or a pig.”

Having finished speaking, he straightened his back and turned away from He Yu. Enduring the discomfort piercing through his entire body, he walked quickly toward the door and grabbed the handle, at which point He Yu caught him.

“What the hell is this bastard doing now?”

The sudden touch slammed Xie Qingcheng right against the restroom door. Sparks of anger flew in Xie Qingcheng’s eyes.

“I don’t have the luxury to waste time with you here! Something happened at home, so I have to go! Stop acting crazy and get lost!”

In this brief moment, He Yu truly wanted to strangle Xie Qingcheng to death. He thought that since he had broken him from behind, Xie Qingcheng would act timid upon meeting, but he was not like that at all.

No, if anything, he had become colder than before. He only spat out words as chilly as a glacier submerged in the ocean.

This attitude provoked He Yu, who was already not in his right mind. In an instant, a desire for blood and violence surged like a storm in his heart. If he had a gun, he might have shot Xie Qingcheng, turning him into a docile corpse that didn’t know how to resist.

In the process of grabbing Xie Qingcheng’s arm and pushing him against the door, their breaths became entangled. But for some reason, He Yu froze upon hearing Xie Qingcheng’s voice groaning in pain.

A scene from the bed last night flashed before his eyes like a kaleidoscope.

“…”

“Let go… fuck… move!”

Xie Qingcheng, his body hot with fever, struggled while pinned under He Yu’s body. On the other hand, He Yu, who had been subtly silent, realized that his own lower half had become hard.

“…”

Xie Qingcheng didn’t notice He Yu’s physical reaction. Conversely, He Yu, overwhelmed by shock, quickly straightened his body and widened his eyes. Wondering if some aphrodisiac had been sprayed, he didn’t dare approach Xie Qingcheng again.

Last night was a complete accident.

Even He Yu had drunk liquor mixed with an aphrodisiac.

It made no sense to develop feelings for Xie Qingcheng because of an unintentional accident.

The relationship that occurred between them was purely a coincidence born of heaven’s will. It was an accident committed while drunk, not a one-night stand they had tacitly agreed upon. Yet, he was showing this kind of reaction toward Xie Qingcheng again.

Xie Qingcheng didn’t know what had happened to He Yu. Regardless, he felt inwardly relieved that he had been let go.

He breathed heavily, glaring at He Yu with eyes full of vigilance. Then, he straightened his disheveled shirt.

In fact, that shirt was a bit small for Xie Qingcheng. The spare shirts provided at the club were all basic designs with limited sizes, so there was nothing that fit Xie Qingcheng’s height of about 180 cm. Consequently, his white wrists were exposed beneath the short sleeves.

The days Xie Qingcheng wore short sleeves were few and far between. No matter how hot the weather, he was always in a long-sleeved shirt and a suit.

A men’s dress shirt that fits properly is supposed to cover the wrists. He Yu had rarely seen Xie Qingcheng’s wrists while he was fully armed in a visit our sitesuit. Even while having sex last night, he had been so excited that he was too busy staring at Xie Qingcheng’s face, fearing he would miss [unauthorized copy]even a moment of his fragile and [visit our site]pathetic expression. He had to indulge in a pleasure he had never felt before, submerged in humid and soft heat.

Because he enjoyed the stimulating sensations, he had neglected other parts of Xie Qingcheng’s body. Even when he overlapped his hand over the back of Xie Qingcheng’s hand in the doggy-style position, he hadn’t paid attention to the wrist.

Only now did he remember that there was a tattoo on Xie Qingcheng’s wrist. It was a tattoo he had seen long ago.

He Yu glanced at Xie Qingcheng’s pale left wrist. Light gray lettering engraved on the upper part of the slender wrist caught his eye.

[Here lies one whose name was written in water.]

A tattoo faded by the long years. If it weren’t for this physical scuffle today, he might have completely forgotten the words engraved on Xie Qingcheng’s wrist.

Having straightened his clothes, Xie Qingcheng gave He Yu one last glare and turned around, leaving the restroom. The door closed loudly behind him.

He Yu stood alone in the restroom, facing the wall where the two had been violently entangled until just now.

Savoring the silence for a moment, he calmed his absurd desires and anxious heart.

The lettering on Xie Qingcheng’s wrist kept flickering before his eyes. At the same time, a voice—cold, yet seemingly suppressing some emotion—lingered in his ears.

-At the very least, I never did anything shameful while treating you.

-Think carefully about how pathetic your current behavior is.

-Think about it yourself.

-You commit a damn act like last night for a mere reason like that? He Yu, you really are a beast, worse than a dog or a pig.

At that moment, a page of memory was blown open by a rough wind and unfolded before his eyes. The young evil dragon vividly recalled a scene from his childhood.

The old story about that tattoo.