52 – How to Fall into the Abyss Side by Side with That Person

Chapter 52: How to Fall into the Abyss Side by Side with That Person

Xie Qingcheng had no idea that He Yu’s reason had collapsed and his convictions had shattered—that he had changed so drastically that he was now overturning his own set of rules.

And yet, the moment his wrist was grabbed, Xie Qingcheng used his free hand to snatch a nearby liquor bottle and shattered it without hesitation.

He Yu’s gaze sank into a deep, pitch-black void.

“What do you plan to do with that?”

His body, intoxicated by alcohol and drugs, was burning. The instinctive, physiological reactions felt as though they would tear his mind apart. Still, Xie Qingcheng was not a man to surrender easily.

Without a word, he gasped for air, his eyes wide and alert like a cheetah’s as he glared at He Yu’s face—.

Then, he took the broken bottle and slammed it ruthlessly down onto his own wrist.

Red blood erupted like a fountain.

Xie Qingcheng squeezed his eyes shut and bit his pale lower lip.

The violent pain barely managed to drag him up from the mire of [Read on Read BL Novels]desire. Xie Qingcheng slowly set down Read on Read BL Novelsthe blood-stained glass bottle, stolen contentthen leaned back against the table, panting with his head tilted back.

He Yu stared at him with a distorted expression.

The body breathing heavily, the taut shirt, the hem of the clothes stained with wine, the bleeding forearm.

Even as his gaze shifted, He Yu gripped Xie Qingcheng’s arm tightly and did not let go. Warm droplets of blood seeped through his fingers.

The surroundings fell silent.

Having momentarily regained his reason, Xie Qingcheng struggled to steady his breath and looked at the young man before him with wet eyes.

He spoke in a cracked voice.

“……He Yu. You… actually… you’re still bothered by what I said in that video, aren’t you.”

He Yu remained silent. Xie Qingcheng’s blood split between his fingers like tears, dripping drop by drop onto the cold marble floor.

And was it just that old video?

He had also discovered what messages had been exchanged in the past.

Even as he thought this, He Yu finally replied with a cold laugh.

“You asked me last time. I think I’ve already answered everything. —I don’t care. Who would still cling to something like that?”

“If you’re going to lie, do it properly. If you really didn’t care, you wouldn’t be doing this today.”

Fine beads of sweat formed on Xie Qingcheng’s face. Short, ragged breaths continued to escape him. He had an intuition that his reason would soon vanish. In this short window of time, he had to convince He Yu to regain even a shred of sanity.

“…….”

“Hey, kid. Honestly… back then….”

Just speaking required an immense amount of effort. The vicious effects of the drug flared up again, swallowing the blood in his body and flowing to his fingertips. When he closed and opened his eyes with all his might, tears welled up from the agony. Yet, he suppressed the tears until the end and swallowed hard.

“……Back then… it wasn’t because I was afraid of you, or because I was scared you’d become another Yi Beihai, that I quit being your attending physician. And I was never worried that I would become like Professor Qin Ciyan.”

Xie Qingcheng struggled to continue.

“You were fourteen when I left. I was by your side for seven years. Perhaps I could have looked after you for another seven years after that. But I can’t do that for a lifetime. Look after you until you graduate and get a job, until you marry and have children? That’s unrealistic. I’m just a doctor. At some point, you had to break free from your trauma on your own. That was why I left.”

After a brief pause, Xie Qingcheng looked at He Yu’s silhouette and added.

“He Yu…… as you know, there are so many people in the world struggling [stolen content]to survive. You don’t even have to go far. Just go to the front of the hospital, the doors of the ICU, or [Read on Read BL Novels]the entrance of the emergency room, and you’ll see. I know you’re suffering. But at least you are alive…….”

However, He Yu did not understand a single word of Xie Qingcheng’s speech. His heart, which was usually like a sheet of ice, was burning pitch-black. It was a rage he had never felt in his life. He grabbed Xie Qingcheng’s hair and dragged him up from the floor.

“So I should just endure it? What am I supposed to endure? Xie Qingcheng…… do you have any idea how miserable I am? Numbness and emotional dysregulation are the basics, and when I have a seizure, I can’t even recognize who I am. It feels like my whole body is empty, rusted, and eaten away, and every single second, I think it would be better to just die. I explained my condition to you so many times over the last seven years…… and yet you still know nothing?”

He Yu’s enraged voice continued.

“Then why did you come to treat me? Huh? If you’re going to tell me to go to the hospital and look at people struggling to survive, if you think my pain is nothing compared to those patients, then why did you come to treat me? Because it seemed fun? I guess so, since it’s a rare case of Psychological Ebola. You couldn’t find a case like this even in the oldest hospital in China. How interesting it must have been. Professor Xie, you treated me as a fresh clinical sample to leave a mark on scientific research. Isn’t that right?”

He Yu’s voice was low and suppressed. The light reflected in his eyes trembled violently with rage.

“Whether it’s a cancer patient or an ALS patient, those patients you speak of can at least know what disease they have and how serious it is. Patients with the same illness comfort each other and receive donations from organizations…… but what about me? I was just a research specimen for you doctors. A mentally ill person interesting enough to study, a monster in a cage. Was it fascinating all of a sudden? So you watched and played with me to your heart’s content and then just left? Even adding lies that aren’t even funny to scam people! And after all that, you tell me not to do this or that—don’t you think that’s cruel? Xie Qingcheng!”

By the end, the accusations poured out like a desperate scream.

Something seemed to flicker deep within Xie Qingcheng’s eyes. However, as he lowered his eyelashes, that glimmer soon vanished.

“……My thoughts remain unchanged, He Yu.”

Xie Qingcheng spoke.

“No matter how lonely or painful it is, I believe that if a person decides to save themselves, they can stolen contenteventually escape their [unauthorized copy]hardships. As long as you don’t give up before you die. The human heart is stronger than you think. He Yu, it’s not me you should believe in. The thing you must believe in until the end is your own heart.”

“Easier said than done.”

He Yu shot back, staring intently into his eyes. Every single word he uttered smelled of blood, as if torn away from a place of hatred.

“Easier said than done, Xie Qingcheng……. You’re not mentally ill and you’re not in pain, yet you criticize me for giving up on life? What do you know? If the roles were reversed and you were the mentally ill one, do you think you would have overcome it so well? Xie Qingcheng. In case you didn’t know, you’re worse at escaping reality than I am. Who was the one who left my house without even finishing the treatment? And who was the one who resigned out of anxiety to move into a professorship?”

He Yu wanted to shove his sharply honed voice beneath that stingy face of Xie Qingcheng’s.

“You are a disgustingly hypocritical human being. You deceived someone for a long time…… and even now, you’re subtly trying to deceive me?”

If there had been a thread of reason left until a moment ago.

Now, he was blinded by rage.

He ruthlessly grabbed Xie Qingcheng’s disheveled hair. Regardless of the pained expression on Xie Qingcheng’s face, he yanked him by the hair and threw him onto the wide sofa to the side, then silently turned around, brought over a bottle of 59-proof plum-scented liquor that hadn’t been opened yet, and uncapped it with an expressionless face.

Xie Qingcheng felt a chill the moment he saw that liquor. It was a drink that could wipe out one’s reason with lust after just one bottle. And yet, the damn He Yu had opened another bottle of that cursed alcohol.

“What on earth are you planning to……!”

At this point, even for Xie Qingcheng, a faint trace of fear crept into Read on Read BL Novelshis voice. He tried to force his stolen contentlanguid, sagging body to stand up.

However, before he could even sit properly on the sofa, He Yu approached holding the bottle of strong liquor. Then, perhaps too lazy to fill a glass, he simply gripped Xie Qingcheng’s jaw and pressed it down.

As he was already fading, the sight of a liquor bottle larger than his own face approaching his nose made Xie Qingcheng turn pale. Irritated, he sharpened his voice.

“This little shit, fuck, is this guy crazy? Get the fuck away from me right now if you don’t want to die—.”

“That’s right. I’m crazy, and you only just realized that? Took you long enough.”

Responding indifferently, He Yu tilted his head back and took a large gulp of the plum-scented liquor. Then, he forced Xie Qingcheng’s mouth open and poured the strong liquor he had just tasted into it.

“Ugh, cough……!”

Xie Qingcheng struggled violently, and half of the liquor spilled onto the floor and his body. Thanks to that, not much alcohol actually entered his mouth, but the strong potency flowing down his throat made him gasp for air. When He Yu let go, Xie Qingcheng collapsed onto the sofa and coughed as if he were trying to expel all the air from his lungs.

Blood mixed with the alcohol, and sweat mixed with the blood.

Xie Qingcheng’s entire body trembled. Along with a terrifying rage, desire began to run wild and bite into him. It felt as if thousands of ants were gnawing at his bones. His tingling body felt frighteningly unfamiliar. However, on his flushed face, anger preceded sexual desire. Infuriated to the core, as soon as his coughing subsided, he whipped his head around and glared at He Yu, panting. Harsh curses flew out of his mouth without mercy.

“What kind of animalistic behavior is this! No, even animals wouldn’t do this! You’ve completely lost your mind, He Yu…….”

“Is that so? You think this is animalistic? Professor Xie, unauthorized copyyou’re surprisingly lacking in vocabulary. There [unauthorized copy]are things even more [unauthorized copy]animalistic—shall I show you now?”

He Yu threw the glass bottle with a bit of liquor left on the floor and stepped forward. Then, he pinned Xie Qingcheng, who was trying to rise, back down onto the soft sofa.

Pinned wrists, hair falling over his forehead, a face drenched in alcohol. A cold, poisonous malice flowed in He Yu’s eyes as he looked down at Xie Qingcheng.

Ragged breaths escaped Xie Qingcheng’s lips.

“He Yu…….”

When his name was called in a voice mixed with fear, He Yu’s lower abdomen throbbed with excitement. He Yu’s pupils glowed with an eerie, dark red light. Straddling Xie Qingcheng, he soothed him in a quiet, tender, yet madness-tinged voice.

“Don’t be afraid, okay?”

Licking the liquor from his lips, He Yu smiled as if savoring the taste.

“Do you know why I drank this too?”

“…….”

“Because I absolutely hate you, and I absolutely hate men. I felt like I’d need to drink this to provide a good service somehow.”

As he continued, He Yu tapped Xie Qingcheng’s cheek.

“Qingcheng-hyung, I’m usually very polite to you. I wanted to treat you properly today since you came all this way. I have my pride, but well, if you dislike those employees, I have no intention of forcing them. Still, it’s a fact that you’re uncomfortable right now because you’ve had too much to drink.”

Startled, Xie Qingcheng finally stared at He Yu with a look of shock. At that moment, He Yu violently yanked Xie Qingcheng by the collar. The tightly fastened collar buttons popped open, revealing a flushed collarbone.

“I can just help you myself.”

Completely gone, He Yu no longer had any intention of coaxing Xie Qingcheng. Xie Qingcheng was a stubborn bastard who would go as far as self-harm to regain his reason. He Yu had realized that aphrodisiacs alone were useless.

He Yu was not in his right mind. He simply wanted to rip apart this fake skin covering Xie Qingcheng. There was nothing to hesitate about in the face of this goal.

He gripped Xie Qingcheng’s neck and spoke through gritted teeth.

“I’ll make you feel good with my own hands today. Until you faint from the pleasure.”

Xie Qingcheng felt like his head was going to explode.

“He Yu! What the hell are you doing!”

“What am I doing? You’ve even been married, so why are you asking as if you don’t know?”

He Yu ruthlessly pinned the man struggling beneath him and took a drink of the plum-scented liquor. He Yu’s senses were also sharply honed. The act of ripping away Read on Read BL NovelsXie Qingcheng’s fake skin was intensely stimulating. A half-stripped shirt Read on Read BL Novelswith bloodstains, and Xie Qingcheng struggling beneath him with a feverishly hot body.

An animalistic gaze stared at Xie Qingcheng. It looked as if he were ready to carve out the skin before his eyes at any moment.

“Hyung…….”

The breath following the word was hot. He Yu’s voice lightly brushed against Xie Qingcheng’s breath.

“What do you think I’m about to do……?”

Xie Qingcheng was a blunt and thorough heterosexual. Furthermore, he knew that He Yu was also heterosexual. No, he was beyond that—he was a homophobe. He was a homophobe who could never have imagined such an absurd act.

He Yu gripped both of Xie Qingcheng’s wrists with one hand and pinned them above his head, then began to undo the remaining shirt buttons with the other. Only then did Xie Qingcheng widen his peach blossom eyes as if struck by a bolt of lightning.

With a bloodless face, he stared at He Yu in shock. He didn’t even dare to check if this was a dream or reality.

Meanwhile, he saw He Yu’s face, where all sorts of emotions were swirling. Unabashed cruelty, perverted madness, a face desperate to chew up and swallow the other’s dignity entirely.

Realizing that He Yu had truly gone mad, Xie Qingcheng began to struggle under He Yu’s grip again. Struggling in vain, he screamed in a cracked voice.

“He Yu…… you bastard…… I…… I don’t need your help! Get off! Fuck, get off right now! What kind of trick is this!”

He Yu watched closely as the face that had always seemed composed collapsed in terror.

This change in Xie Qingcheng strongly stimulated He Yu’s taste buds. His desire swelled even more greedily. He subdued Xie Qingcheng, who had collapsed on the sofa. He wanted to use his fingertips as knives to slice into Xie Qingcheng’s skin bit by bit.

When he smiled, his straight features distorted slightly.

“Professor Xie, Mr. Xie, Qingcheng-hyung. You know everything, so why ask?”

It was a voice filled with heavy heat. Xie Qingcheng’s chest, rising and falling in ragged breaths, grew hot in response.

“I’ll hold you all night long, so make sure to moan loudly later.”

He slid his free hand to stroke Xie Qingcheng’s trembling lips.

Xie Qingcheng snapped his eyes shut. He felt like he was going crazy, but there was no strength left in his body. The more he struggled, the more his energy drained.

“Fuck, just try and touch me…… you pervert…….”

Despite the stream of curses, He Yu tore Xie Qingcheng’s clothes with a grim expression. When resisting with flailing hands proved useless, Xie Qingcheng eventually gave up on his upper body and tried to defend his belt buckle. Regardless, He Yu kissed Xie Qingcheng’s bare shoulder, neck, and collarbone. His dark head moved further down. Burying his face in the chest before him, He Yu licked the pale pink nipple once with the tip of his rough tongue and then sucked it in forcefully.

“Ngh!”

Xie Qingcheng flinched and jumped like a fish on a [visit our site]cutting board, visit our siteeyes wide. However, He Yu’s reckless touch pinned him down stolen contentagain. His body, sensitized to lust by the poured aphrodisiac, instinctively craved another physical body.

As is often the case with animal instincts, once sexual desire burns to the top of one’s head, the fact that the partner is of the same sex becomes an afterthought.

But Xie Qingcheng did not forget his humanity. He did not forget that he was an adult compared to He Yu, nor that he was an acquaintance who had known He Yu’s father for a long time. This situation made no sense. He should not show himself in such a state to He Yu.

Driven to extreme distress, his expression distorted. Terrifying desire and resentment mixed in his head. He finally turned his head to the side.

He Yu, who had been kissing Xie Qingcheng’s chest, felt the body twitch and looked up. As the handsome face, flushed with lust and pain, entered his sight, he suddenly felt an intense stimulation unlike anything before. He was so excited that he wanted to toy with Xie Qingcheng by any means necessary, enough to overcome even his aversion to a man’s body.

This was a Xie Qingcheng he had never seen before.

A Xie Qingcheng paying the price for deceiving him.

Perhaps because he was extremely excited, He Yu’s pupils turned strangely red.

The pleasure of revenge surpassed the disgust. The thrill of the desire for conquest silenced the homophobe’s rejection response.

Suddenly, he felt resentful of himself. To think he had only found this exquisite way to tear Xie Qingcheng apart today.

With persistent touch, every single button of Xie Qingcheng’s shirt was undone, revealing skin stained with liquor.

His chest was quite flat and broad. Though not overly [unauthorized copy]muscular, it was firm and the contours were sharp. To anyone, it [Read on Read BL Novels]was unmistakably the body of an adult man.

For a moment, he felt a strange sense of dissonance, but He Yu’s blood soon boiled at the sight of Xie Qingcheng’s naked body.

You can’t give me anything?

I’m not someone who can be loved?

This man had always reigned over him with an arrogant air of superiority. Since childhood, he had scolded, cursed, threatened, and deceived him. Right before leaving, he had even sneered, saying, “You aren’t in a position to hire me.”

Xie Qingcheng—the all-around perfectionist who stood indifferently upon the podium, revered by countless students.

A man’s man.

With a mature, upright, yet cold and solemn aura, he captured the gaze of women; a man who had even been married once. A man so masculine that he would never kneel before another man, nor be pinned beneath one.

How satisfying it was to see him now, crushed beneath his body, struggling to hide his trembling.

Now, he could receive the thing he wanted, the heat he craved.

He could receive it through Xie Qingcheng’s body.

The young man’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and visit our sitedown. His [unauthorized copy]blood [visit our site]boiled in an unbearable heat.

“Teacher Xie. Tonight, you drank too much and asked me for help. I’m not as cowardly as you, you know? I’ll take care of you devotedly, even if it means sacrificing myself, so you don’t have to be too grateful.”

Having finished speaking, He Yu pulled Xie Qingcheng’s shirt down and pulled a black cord from the side drawer. As if to prove this was a secret private room, it was fully equipped with play toys. Using the cord he found, he tied Xie Qingcheng’s two hands tightly.

“I remember how you untied the cords Jiang Lanpei used back then. Don’t worry. This is a knot used for catching criminals, so you’ll never be able to undo it on your own.”