18 – The Junction of End and Beginning

Whether it was because of the doctor’s warning that a heat cycle was coming, or if the timing was just perfect, Eun-soo felt his body heating up starting the day after he visited the hospital. His muscles ached as if he had performed intense exercise, and he could clearly feel pheromones pouring out of his nose and mouth with every breath.

Even so, he couldn’t hastily take sleeping pills. A heat cycle didn’t end in three or four hours. It would last at least a day, and possibly two. Even if he took sleeping pills, it was impossible to sleep for more than a day, so he had to take them as late as possible.

The doctor had left the irresponsible advice to take them when it felt like the heat cycle was starting, but it wasn’t that simple.

Eun-soo grew more anxious as time passed. He went beyond biting his lower lip to chewing on his fingernails. Neither food nor water would go down his throat. It was so bad that he felt more scared and terrified than when he first experienced a heat cycle after his manifestation in middle school.

As Eun-soo sat with his back against the bed, sighing repeatedly, there was a knock, and Do-kwon entered. In his hands was a tray with a sandwich and fruit.

“Eun-soo. Let’s eat.”

“…….”

Eun-soo looked at Do-kwon with eyes flushed a deep red. Unlike Eun-soo’s gaze, which was filled with anxiety, Do-kwon was perfectly calm.

Do-kwon set the tray on the table. Then, he waited quietly for Eun-soo to come.

“I’m not hungry,” Eun-soo mumbled.

Do-kwon raised an eyebrow as if he had expected that, then approached Eun-soo.

“The doctor said you need to eat well. Just a little bit. I bought these sandwiches on purpose.”

Do-kwon coaxed Eun-soo gently. However, Eun-soo only buried his face between his folded knees and didn’t answer. Do-kwon let out a soft sigh through his nose and knelt on one knee in front of him. Then, like soothing a sensitive cat, he spoke softly.

“This is your last meal before the heat cycle.”

“……What?”

“I think there are only a few hours left. Three hours at most.”

“How… how do you know that, Do-kwon?”

“How could I not know? Think of how many heat cycles I’ve spent with you. Your scent is overflowing everywhere.”

Do-kwon licked his lower lip and swallowed hard. The flooding scent of Eun-soo was enough to make his mind go hazy. Seeing that expression, Eun-soo instinctively pressed his back tighter against the bed. It was an act of avoidance.

At this, Do-kwon wore a bittersweet smile.

“I won’t do anything. If you don’t want me to, I will absolutely not touch you.”

“…….”

“So eat. I’ll leave after I see you eat.”

“…….”

Eun-soo hesitated, chewing his lip. Then, he slowly pushed himself up. Do-kwon smiled faintly and followed him.

Sitting at the table, Eun-soo sipped on orange juice with floating pulp. While doing so, he stole glances at Do-kwon. Do-kwon did nothing other than attend to Eun-soo’s meal. Eun-soo himself could feel the pheromones leaking from his entire body, so it was surprising that Do-kwon didn’t even blink. In a way, it felt somewhat deflating.

Setting down the juice glass, Eun-soo asked casually.

“How did you endure your ruts, Do-kwon?”

At the sudden question, Do-kwon’s eyebrows twitched.

“Me?”

“Yes. Did you… sleep with other people?”

Eun-soo asked, pretending to be indifferent as he picked up a sandwich. Do-kwon’s eyes widened. After blinking several times while looking at Eun-soo, Do-kwon let out a laugh that sounded like a deflating balloon.

“Pfft… No. No way. I spent the entire two years floundering in the grief of your death. I just took medication.”

“The medicine doesn’t work for you, Do-kwon.”

Eun-soo looked at Do-kwon with eyes still full of doubt.

“Standard Alpha medication doesn’t work, but Dominant Alpha medication does.”

“There’s a separate one for Dominant Alphas?”

At Eun-soo’s repeated questions, Do-kwon let out a hum from his throat. Then, noticing that Eun-soo hadn’t even touched the sandwich, he told him to listen while eating. Eun-soo reluctantly picked up the sandwich. He felt that if he didn’t eat it, Do-kwon wouldn’t tell him what he wanted to know.

Eun-soo took a large bite of the thick sandwich filled with smoked salmon and cheese. As he chewed, only then did Do-kwon’s lips curve into an arc.

“One of my friends is the daughter of a pharmaceutical company owner. She’s brilliant, so instead of management, she’s involved in drug research, but her interests are a bit… like that.”

“What do you mean by ‘a bit like that’?”

“She likes drugs.”

“……What?”

“Not that she likes taking drugs, but she likes making them this way and that. And she doesn’t make narcotics, but rather narcotic analgesics. Anyway, that’s why she’s mostly abroad. Research itself is illegal in Korea.”

“…….”

“I get Dominant Alpha rut suppressants from her. They contain narcotic components, so they’re illegal in Korea, but legal overseas. Whenever she comes to Korea, I stock up on a lot, but I stopped getting them after I met you. Because I didn’t need them.”

Eun-soo nodded slightly as if he understood. Regardless of what medicine he took, as long as he hadn’t met another Omega, it didn’t matter what Do-kwon had done.

Eun-soo took another large bite of the sandwich. Perhaps the tension had eased through the conversation, as he could finally taste the chewy salmon.

As Eun-soo was diligently chewing, Do-kwon stole a glance at him. He scratched the nape of his neck or fiddled with his kneecap with his fingertips. Then, he spoke tentatively.

“That… woman I saw last time.”

“Huh? A woman?”

Eun-soo, with cheeks puffed out like a hamster, widened his eyes. A woman? Suddenly? Who? What woman? Which woman from last time?

As Eun-soo mentally reviewed, the only woman he had met with Do-kwon was the psychiatrist. Why was she suddenly being mentioned? As Eun-soo pushed his chin forward in confusion, Do-kwon added an explanation.

“Two years ago… we met at a restaurant. The restaurant we used to go to often. When I had lost my memories. The one with the short-haired girl.”

At those words, Eun-soo’s eyelashes shot up. He realized which woman Do-kwon was talking about. The day he had touched the steak plate. Do-kwon and a strange woman sitting next to him. The woman with the charming smile. The woman whose relationship with Do-kwon he had suspected.

Eun-soo froze, unable to even chew the sandwich full in his mouth. Do-kwon quickly added more to clear up the stale misunderstanding.

“That’s her. The one who researches drugs. I met her then to get rut suppressants.”

“Ah…….”

“There’s nothing between us. Just friends out of necessity. I get the medicine, and she—or rather, her pharmaceutical company—supplies drugs to Seong-jin Hospital. We’re close through work. Usually, we just exchange documents and meet once every two or three years.”

Do-kwon’s words were fast. His sentences were short. It was a series of words that clearly revealed his anxious state of mind.

“I was worried you might still be misunderstanding…….”

Do-kwon trailed off. He worried if he had ruined the mood by mentioning it, or if he was digging up something Eun-soo had already forgotten. Do-kwon repeatedly licked his dry lips.

“…….”

Eun-soo stared intently at Do-kwon. He had thought about wanting to ask about his relationship with that woman someday, but he hadn’t expected Do-kwon to bring it up first. As Do-kwon said, he had been misunderstanding. He had thought it was a topic Do-kwon would avoid.

But seeing him speak like that, he wondered if he really had misunderstood. At the same time, he suspected if Do-kwon was lying.

As Eun-soo hesitated, unable to speak easily, Do-kwon said with a desperate expression,

“Since I met you, Eun-soo, it has been only you. Just as it was for you.”

“…….”

“I haven’t thought of another person for a single moment. I haven’t even imagined it. My only options were you or nothing.”

Even when he lost his memories and threw Eun-soo away with his own hands, he had never thought of meeting someone else. For Do-kwon, it had always, always been Eun-soo.

“…….”

Eun-soo looked Do-kwon straight in the eye.

“…….”

Do-kwon met that gaze without avoiding it. Since he couldn’t tear open his chest to show him, this was the only way to express his sincerity.

The silence stretched. Do-kwon was so nervous that he was even holding his breath. If Eun-soo continued to maintain the silence, he might have fainted from suffocation.

After some time, Eun-soo slowly spoke.

“……I understand.”

At those words, Do-kwon took a deep breath. His shrunken lungs expanded, and his chest and shoulders swelled. Then he let out a long exhale. His tense shoulders relaxed. He felt the tension leave him, as if a major misunderstanding had been resolved.

And then, Eun-soo’s suddenly expanding pheromones pierced through Do-kwon like bars. Startled, Do-kwon instinctively covered his nose and mouth. The sandwich slipped from Eun-soo’s hand and fell.

“Ugh…….”

“Eun-soo?”

Do-kwon bolted upright and approached Eun-soo. Then he froze. Eun-soo’s scent was erupting intensely. The moment he got close, a phantom sensation arose as if his entire body was being soaked by those pheromones.

Eun-soo’s heat cycle was about to begin.

As Do-kwon instinctively stepped back, Eun-soo curled his body, letting out a thin moan.

“Ah…….”

His clear eyes turned red, and thick pheromones poured from between his lips. His hands curled into fists automatically.

His body burned. As his veins grew hot, he could vividly feel how and in which direction his blood was flowing. Eun-soo looked at Do-kwon with bloodshot eyes. Do-kwon, who had been standing there blankly like an idiot, finally snapped to his senses.

He brought the sleeping pills from the bedroom nightstand. He held them out to Eun-soo along with water. Eun-soo took them with trembling hands. However, his body wouldn’t obey. He couldn’t even pick up all three pills and dropped one.

In his urgency, Eun-soo put two in his mouth first. Meanwhile, Do-kwon picked up the dropped one and personally placed it in Eun-soo’s mouth. In his heart, he wanted to get fresh pills, but there was no time. Once he saw all three pills enter Eun-soo’s mouth, Do-kwon held the water to his lips.

Eun-soo swallowed the water frantically. He was so thirsty he felt he could drink the entire ocean. Soon, the glass was empty. As Eun-soo poked his tongue out in disappointment, Do-kwon heartlessly took the glass away.

“Did you swallow the medicine?” he asked.

Eun-soo nodded quickly. Then, like a child, he opened his mouth wide. After confirming the inside of his bright red mouth, Do-kwon picked him up and headed for the bed.

After carefully laying Eun-soo down, he started to lift the blanket but paused. He thought it might be too hot if he covered him. But he worried Eun-soo might catch a cold if he left his body exposed.

After a moment of deliberation, Do-kwon covered Eun-soo up to his waist. Then he adjusted the pillow and stroked Eun-soo’s forehead, which was already damp with cold sweat.

“Eun-soo. I’ll be in the living room. Call me if you need anything.”

Do-kwon whispered in a low voice. Eun-soo nodded and closed his eyes. Looking down at him, Do-kwon straightened his bent waist. Then, he gathered the leftover food and left the bedroom.

After checking on Eun-soo’s well-being one last time, he closed the door with a click. And then.

“Haaaah…….”

He let out the breath he had been holding. He had tried to act as if nothing was wrong, but he felt like he was suffocating in Eun-soo’s pheromones. It had been so long since he had felt Eun-soo’s pheromones so vividly that his vision was completely blurred.

His scent, his body odor, was so wonderful. If he had stayed just a moment longer, Do-kwon might have lost his mind and devoured Eun-soo’s sweet body.

Even now, a foul desire to open the closed door, a dark greed to climb on top of Eun-soo and ravage him mercilessly, seethed within his chest.

Leaning against the door, Do-kwon grit his teeth. The veins at his temples bulged.

He couldn’t. He mustn’t. Harboring such sinister desires for Eun-soo was a sin in itself.

How could he? How could he possibly dare?

Do-kwon closed his eyes tightly and then opened them. Then, as if fleeing from something, he quickly distanced himself from the bedroom.

Sitting on the living room sofa, Do-kwon looked at the clock hanging next to the TV. Three hours had passed. Three hours since Eun-soo had taken a sleeping pill and fallen asleep.

In the meantime, it seemed the heat cycle had fully arrived, as Eun-soo’s scent filled the entire house. At first, Do-kwon had been in the study near the bedroom, but his mind became so clouded that he had come downstairs.

As if intending to release every bit of pheromone he hadn’t been able to emit for two years, Eun-soo was violently pumping out an alluring fragrance. Do-kwon felt intoxicated by Eun-soo’s pheromones. His brain felt mushy like jelly, and his eyes felt as if they were melting.

“Whew…”

Do-kwon carelessly tossed the tablet he had been obsessively staring at onto the sofa. Then, he irritably ruffled his hair.

He tried to get some work done, but the letters simply wouldn’t enter his eyes. He had reached a point where he couldn’t even distinguish whether what he was looking at was Korean or English.

This was the first time he had endured Eun-soo’s pheromones and his heat cycle while completely sober. Previously, he had counted down the days until Eun-soo’s heat cycle, and the moment it arrived, he would strip naked and throw himself at him.

The mingling breaths, the soft skin he had kneaded and sucked to his heart’s content, the plump and smooth buttocks, his narrow and hot inner walls, the meeting of their eyes, and the feverish moans exchanged between overlapping lips.

All of it was still vivid.

As Do-kwon closed his eyes, his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down significantly. His shameless lower half grew heavy. In truth, he had been in this state since the moment he laid Eun-soo down and left the room. He had tried to compose himself, but as Eun-soo’s pheromones piled up layer by layer, he decided to just let it be.

Do-kwon rubbed his face vigorously with both hands. In his heart, he wanted to leave the house. Being unable to do anything, simply inhaling Eun-soo’s pheromones felt like poison. He felt as if his entire body was being beaten by the scent.

However, he couldn’t leave his post. He didn’t know what might happen to Eun-soo. In a little while, he had to go into the bedroom to check his temperature. If the fever rose too high, he would have to go to the hospital. Or, he might wake up in the middle of his heat cycle. He couldn’t be left alone.

Biting his lower lip hard, Do-kwon reached for the tablet again. Whether the letters made sense or not, he felt that if he didn’t focus his mind on something else, he would turn into an animal any second. He felt as if he would bolt up to the bedroom and devour Eun-soo bit by bit.

It was just as he lit up the tablet. Suddenly, Eun-soo’s scent grew as violent as a storm. How should he put it? It felt as if the wall blocking the two of them had evaporated, making Eun-soo feel more distinct.

Wrinkling his nose, Do-kwon instinctively looked toward the stairs leading to the second floor. There,

“…Eun-soo?”

Eun-soo was standing there. Do-kwon called out to him with a face as if he had seen a ghost. Leaning against the stair railing, Eun-soo looked at Do-kwon. His gaze was strange.

His eyelids covered more than half of his large eyes. His eyelashes were drooping, and a reddish flush had risen to his eyes and cheeks. His plump lips were flushed red, letting out ragged, feverish breaths. His bangs were soaked with cold sweat, and his neck also glistened, wet and smooth. His thin collarbones were revealed through his wide-open homewear.

Do-kwon swallowed hard.

How Eun-soo had woken up. Why he was standing there blankly. Why he was looking at him with such a gaze. There were many things he needed to know, but his body wouldn’t move.

But at that moment, Eun-soo slowly moved his foot. Then, he descended one step. It was only a single step, but Eun-soo’s entire body swayed. Coming to his senses belatedly, Do-kwon bolted upright and headed for the stairs.

Using his long legs, Do-kwon strode up the stairs three at a time. Then, Eun-soo also came down the stairs. He was descending in such a hurry, as if something were urgent, which made Do-kwon extremely anxious. His thin body was swaying heavily from side to side.

“Eun-soo. Wait there.”

Anxious, Do-kwon tried to stop him. But Eun-soo ignored him and moved his legs quickly. A frown creased Do-kwon’s brow. The stairs he climbed every day felt excruciatingly numerous today.

It was then, when only a few steps remained between Eun-soo and Do-kwon. The moment the sole of Eun-soo’s foot touched the edge of a step, he slipped.

“Eun-soo!”

Do-kwon held his breath. Eun-soo was falling like a bird with broken wings. He stretched out his arms and caught the collapsing Eun-soo in his embrace. The momentum of Eun-soo’s fall crashed directly into Do-kwon. Do-kwon’s body tilted, and he fell backward.

A loud crash echoed. The protruding edges of the stairs poked painfully into Do-kwon’s back. Even so, Do-kwon did not let go of Eun-soo. Instead, he hugged him tighter, cursing his own narrow chest that couldn’t even wrap around Eun-soo’s knees or feet.

A few seconds later. The fall, which was short in reality but felt long, ended.

“Ugh…”

Do-kwon grimaced at the throbbing pain in his back. He felt as if his joints had twisted and shifted. After swallowing the pain for a moment, Do-kwon snapped back to attention. He checked the well-being of Eun-soo, who was held in his arms.

“Eun-soo. Are you okay? Hmm?”

Eun-soo squirmed his body and peeked his head up. Though his cheeks were flushed, that was because of the heat cycle, and seeing that his face wasn’t contorted, it seemed he wasn’t hurt anywhere. The tension snapped, and Do-kwon slumped limply.

As he was calming his startled heart while staring at the distant ceiling, Eun-soo buried his face in the crook of Do-kwon’s neck.

“Haa… Do-kwon-ssi…”

“…”

Do-kwon stiffened again. He had an ominous feeling. He could feel that Eun-soo, who was pressing his nose into his neck, Eun-soo, who was slowly pressing his body closer, Eun-soo, who was stroking his chest, wanted something he shouldn’t want.

“Eu, Eun-soo.”

Do-kwon tried to push Eun-soo away. But Eun-soo clung even closer. He climbed right on top of Do-kwon’s body and rubbed his buttocks against him.

“I really… want to do it. I want it so much I… can’t sleep. Let’s have sex. Please? Let’s do it…”

Unlike his usual soft voice, his voice, which was cracked and filled with breath, was excessively seductive. The eyes looking down at Do-kwon, completely unfocused; the languid and lewd expression; the slender fingers gently stroking Do-kwon’s jawline.

Do-kwon’s rationality began to evaporate at a very rapid speed. Eun-soo’s seductive pheromones crushed Do-kwon relentlessly.

Do-kwon’s fingertips trembled. The desire to grip and knead Eun-soo manifested at his fingertips.

A deep conflict raged. Whether to devour the swaying Eun-soo before his eyes, or to push him away. It was an unfair conflict, with the weight heavily skewed to one side.

But Do-kwon overcame it. Tightening his lips, Do-kwon shook his head with a determined expression.

“No.”

“…”

“No, Eun-soo.”

“Why not?”

Eun-soo asked, tilting his head. Even while asking, he slowly rubbed his buttocks against Do-kwon’s lower half. Between the pheromones seeping out and Eun-soo’s burning body heat, Do-kwon bit his lip.

Why wouldn’t Do-kwon want to hold Eun-soo? This was an opportunity that might never come again. Heat cycles would continue to happen in the future, but then Eun-soo would take suppressants. He might never again have Eun-soo cling to him first like this for the rest of his life.

Pretending to know nothing, pretending to be an immature Alpha completely swayed by an Omega, taking his body would have been a much better choice.

It had been well over two years that he had spent in abstinence, longing for Eun-soo. So, couldn’t he be a little greedy today? He wondered if he could act like a shameless Alpha who had lost his mind to desire for just one day, just one single day.

But Do-kwon knew well.

“No. You’ll regret it.”

How Eun-soo would react after the heat cycle ended, how much he would suffer. He would surely wail, resenting his identity as an Omega. How could he watch that from the side? Moreover, he was the one who had stubbornly kept Eun-soo, who wanted to return to his own home. He was the one who had told him that his side was safe.

He never, ever wanted to disappoint Eun-soo again. He didn’t want to hurt him. He intended not to do anything that Eun-soo disliked.

Do-kwon tried to grab Eun-soo’s waist to pull him down. But Eun-soo resisted, putting strength into his thighs.

“I won’t regret it.”

“Still, no.”

But Do-kwon did not back down either. He tightened his grip on Eun-soo’s waist and blocked his movements.

Staring at such a Do-kwon, Eun-soo asked with a crestfallen face.

“…Do you hate me?”

“What?”

“Like back then? Am I… dirty or something? Is that why you’re pushing me away?”

His tiny face was full of sorrow. Startled, Do-kwon bolted his upper body up. Due to the sudden movement, Eun-soo lost his balance and began to fall backward. Do-kwon wrapped his arms around Eun-soo’s back and waist, and spoke lowly and clearly.

“It’s not like that. How could I hate you, Eun-soo.”

At those words, the drooping corners of Eun-soo’s eyes immediately curved upward. He spoke while sliding his hand inside Do-kwon’s knit sweater.

“Then let’s have sex. You can do it.”

“…Eun-soo.”

Do-kwon called Eun-soo as if sighing. When the heat cycle hit, Eun-soo became as young as a child. He was honest with his emotions, clear about what he wanted, and didn’t know how to beat around the bush. It was as if he were heavily drunk. Or as if he had taken drugs.

He had experienced this countless times, but today, such an Eun-soo felt unfamiliar. Because regarding this secret act, there had never been a single time where what he wanted and what Do-kwon wanted conflicted.

Do-kwon gently grasped Eun-soo’s wrist. Then, he looked into his eyes earnestly.

“You… you’ll hate it.”

“…”

At those words, Eun-soo sucked on his own lower lip. Then, rubbing his cheek against Do-kwon’s chest, he whispered in a sweet voice, as if acting cute.

“I won’t hate it. Do it. I really… want to do it…”

“…”

“My back is, it’s itchy. Your thing, please? Do-kwon-ssi, do it for me.”

“…”

“Do it. Quickly, right here…”

Eun-soo pulled Do-kwon’s hand and made him grip his buttocks. The plump flesh filled Do-kwon’s hand. On top of that, his lower half was subtly rubbing against Eun-soo’s crotch, and his soft cheek was crushed against his chest.

It was utterly chaotic. Not that Eun-soo was chaotic, but Do-kwon’s mind was.

A vein bulged on Do-kwon’s forehead. Desire seeped even deeper into his black pupils. Lust, carnal desire, the urge to conquer—all sorts of erotic needs chewed Do-kwon up.

“Ah… Eun-soo… Don’t do this. It’s hard for me to endure…”

Do-kwon hugged Eun-soo’s body tightly and buried his face in his neck.

No matter how much he tried to keep his senses, Do-kwon was ultimately an Alpha. An Alpha created to be captivated in body and mind by an Omega. Eun-soo’s pheromones and body scent were absolute.

Moreover, wasn’t this the Eun-soo he had cried out for for years? The Eun-soo he had longed for and wanted to hold in his hand?

Regardless of what the future held, for now, he wanted to hold Eun-soo. He wanted to climb on top of his white body and do all sorts of bad things.

Still, still he had to endure. This wasn’t right. He shouldn’t do this.

Closing his eyes tightly and then opening them, Do-kwon tried to push Eun-soo away. Just then, Eun-soo thrust his face forward and abruptly pressed his lips against his.

“…”

Do-kwon froze. He had to push Eun-soo away. He couldn’t go any further. But his body wouldn’t listen.

Eun-soo sucked on Do-kwon’s lips with little kissing sounds. He sucked diligently, wherever his heart led, regardless of whether it was the upper or lower lip. Then, he peeked his tongue out and licked. The warm, heated tongue was excessively stimulating. His tongue persistently attacked the gap between Do-kwon’s lips. It seemed he wanted to come inside.

Do-kwon grit his teeth and held out. Eun-soo made a whining sound. Then, he looked up at Do-kwon with a tearful face.

“Do-kwon-ssi—”

Do it. Sex. Do it with me. Eun-soo showered Do-kwon’s chin with kisses. With his hands, he stroked Do-kwon’s firm chest and thick forearms. The touch was so affectionate and lovely that Do-kwon let out a small laugh without realizing it.

“…”

At that, Eun-soo’s movements stopped abruptly. He stared intently at the laughing Do-kwon. As Do-kwon also stiffened at the unusual reaction, Eun-soo soon smiled, his eyes curving softly.

The corners of his eyes folded beautifully. His cheekbones rose roundly, and his ears moved slightly. His plump lips opened wide. His neat teeth were glimpsed for a moment before disappearing.

That beautiful face stuck firmly to Do-kwon’s retina.

“Ah…”

Do-kwon let out a short gasp. It was a smile he was seeing for the first time. That is, the first smile he had seen since meeting Eun-soo again.

It couldn’t be anything less than fantastic. After being dazed for a moment, he cupped the back of Eun-soo’s head. And then, he pressed his lips against his.

When his brain had dried up from a piercing thirst, a single sip of holy water felt like a miracle. The word ‘refreshing’ alone could not dare express all of that clarity.

Eun-soo trembled with his whole body at Do-kwon’s pheromones and body heat seeping in. Every time Do-kwon’s large hands swept down, kneading his waist, thighs, forearms, and pelvis, his knees shook with spasms.

Having lost his reason to Eun-soo’s persistent temptation, Do-kwon laid Eun-soo on the sofa without going far. And as he pressed his lips back together after a brief separation, he stripped off Eun-soo’s clothes as if tearing them.

“Ah-eut…”

Eun-soo squirmed, scratching Do-kwon’s thick and hard forearms. Goosebumps rose as the clothes stretched tight under Do-kwon’s rough touch and then slid down his skin. Everything that touched and brushed against his body was stimulating.

Of course, the most erotic and fatal stimulation was Do-kwon’s pheromones flowing heavily down his throat.

With hazy eyes, Eun-soo sucked on Do-kwon’s lips. As if responding to that desperate gesture, Do-kwon filled Eun-soo’s mouth with his tongue. Do-kwon’s tongue, like a thick and powerful python, filled Eun-soo’s mouth. As Do-kwon licked as if pressing against his teeth, scratched the roof of his mouth, and pushed under his tongue, Eun-soo’s waist thrashed wildly.

The mingling saliva was like a drug. It also felt like a terribly strong poison. The already faint thoughts and reason of the two people died completely. All that remained was a thirst that wouldn’t be quenched no matter how much they filled it, and the desire for each other.

Finally, all the clothes vanished from Eun-soo’s body. It hadn’t even taken three minutes. To Do-kwon, it felt as long as eternity.

Do-kwon slightly pulled his lips away. Then, he looked at Eun-soo’s naked body revealed under the bright light.

“Ah…”

A breathless exclamation escaped between his teeth. How long had it been since he had seen Eun-soo’s body? A body so white it was dazzling. The tips of his shoulders, elbows, fingertips, knees, and heels were crimson, as if someone had painstakingly dyed them. And his lovely genitals, glistening smoothly in the middle of his groin.

Looking down at that ecstatic body, his spine and neck grew stiff. To think that such an Eun-soo wanted him. To think he had come into his arms first. Regardless of the reason, this situation felt like a dream, yet it approached as an unmistakably clear reality.

Do-kwon threw off his own top in one go. Then, he spread Eun-soo’s legs and positioned himself between them. Naturally, Eun-soo’s soft thighs and Do-kwon’s waist touched.

Then, Eun-soo suddenly twisted his neck, lifted his hips, and let out a long moan.

“Hieeeek…”

A high-pitched moan flowed out thinly. Then, Eun-soo’s twitching genitals spurted white, cloudy fluid.

Just by touching, just by Do-kwon’s burning lower half being pressed against his buttocks for a moment, he had reached a climax helplessly, driven by Do-kwon’s intense gaze falling over him like a rain shower, his pheromones, and the anticipation of the pleasure to come.

Do-kwon, who had been momentarily spellbound by the sight, soon let out a chuckle. He gently wrapped his hand around Eun-soo’s genitals, which were still twitching from the afterglow of the climax.

“Ah-heuk!”

Startled by the sudden contact, Eun-soo lifted his head, raising his upper body as if doing a sit-up. In response, Do-kwon pressed him back down, overlapping and biting Eun-soo’s lips. Eun-soo collapsed onto the sofa with a soft slide.

Do-kwon deliciously swallowed the moans humming inside Eun-soo’s mouth. With one hand, he slowly stroked Eun-soo’s wet member up and down, while with the other, he caressed Eun-soo’s slender neck, lean waist, appropriately plump thighs, and soft buttocks.

“Nng, hng…”

Eun-soo’s moans became even sweeter. Do-kwon helped him adapt slowly to the pleasure. Eun-soo had not experienced a heat cycle for a very long time. His pheromones had been suppressed, and there had been no contact with other Alphas. It was no wonder he had woken up, overcoming even the sleeping pills.

Therefore, he had to continue this encounter as carefully as possible, coaxing and soothing him. Otherwise, Eun-soo might faint, strangled by the sheer intensity of the pleasure.

The more Do-kwon provided soft, slow pleasure, the more active Eun-soo’s movements became. If he had been impatient before due to the exploding heat cycle, now he stroked Do-kwon quite lovably, as if he wanted to touch and feel Do-kwon himself.

He ran his fingers through the back of Do-kwon’s hair, rubbed his own chest against Do-kwon’s impressive pectoral muscles, stroked Do-kwon’s bulging forearms as if scratching them, and occasionally stimulated Do-kwon’s thick, heavy length with his shins.

In this way, the two of them slowly prepared themselves to accept one another.

By the time their pressed lips felt tingling, Do-kwon pulled away. Out of lingering longing, Eun-soo’s tongue peeked out to see him off. Do-kwon let out a quiet laugh, sucked the tongue long and hard, and then released it.

Then, he moved down along the line of Eun-soo’s neck. Passing the straight collarbones, he reached the flat but soft chest. Do-kwon rubbed his cheek against Eun-soo’s chest, like a small child.

He could faintly feel Eun-soo’s heartbeat. It was indescribably moving. His pheromones filling the lungs. His warm body heat felt throughout the entire body. And even the sound of his heart seeping through the cheek.

It was entirely Eun-soo. He was a perfectly flawless Eun-soo.

The fact was so happy that no matter how much Do-kwon chewed over it, he almost shed a few tears, forgetting the mood.

As Do-kwon swam in waves of emotion and joy, Eun-soo’s nipples suddenly entered his field of vision. It had been a long time since he had encountered them.

The nipples, still pink, were beyond lovely. Their appropriate size and slightly plump shape were excessively appetizing. He felt a strange desire to cut them out beautifully and keep them in his mouth for the rest of his life.

Do-kwon opened his mouth wide and took a nipple in. Without bothering to lick, he sucked it powerfully.

“Ahng!”

Eun-soo let out a short moan and twisted his waist. Do-kwon sucked the nipple fiercely, as if he intended to tear the skin right off.

Wet, embarrassing sounds echoed repeatedly.

He could clearly feel Eun-soo’s soft skin being pressed between his teeth. The grain of the nipple tickling the roof of his mouth, and the way Eun-soo’s ribs brushed against his chin as the tense man inhaled, were both highly erotic.

Exhaling hot breaths, Do-kwon sucked Eun-soo’s chest even more fiercely.

“It feels… good… Hng, ah! It’s good…”

Eun-soo wore a hazy smile while kneading Do-kwon’s shoulders. Every time his nipples were crushed by the heavy pressure, a shiver ran down his spine. It was so intense that the skin actually stung, but for some reason, even that felt good. Goosebumps rose on his forearms from Do-kwon’s hot breath.

Unable to maintain his senses against the pleasure he hadn’t felt in so long, Eun-soo’s body, collapsed by lust, was about to reach a climax again. His wet member twitched frantically.

After clinging to one nipple for a while, Do-kwon moved his lips to the other. He found it very commendable that the nipple stood out on its own even without being touched.

Just then, Eun-soo, who had been swallowing the ticklish yet thrilling pleasure, fumbled to wrap his hand around his own member. He began to masturbate with awkward movements.

Do-kwon glanced down at Eun-soo’s lower half. Seeing Eun-soo masturbating made him feel as if his chest were twisting.

Masturbating? While I’m right here in front of him? I can do anything he wants. Touch him, suck him, lick him, knead him, thrust into him—I’ll do whatever he wants.

Do-kwon sucked the nipple hard once more and then let go.

“Ah-nng!”

Eun-soo moaned loudly and shook himself faster. His fragile member was on the verge of vomiting semen at the orgasm. At that moment, Do-kwon wrinkled his nose, grabbed Eun-soo’s wrist, and flicked it upward.

Eun-soo’s eyes widened. He tried to grab his member again with his other hand. Do-kwon snatched that hand as well, gathering them together.

Eun-soo let out an annoyed moan and closed his legs. He then rubbed his thighs together, craving the pleasure that was just a hand’s breadth away.

Do-kwon kissed Eun-soo’s forehead, cheeks, and lips. Then, as if soothing the heated Eun-soo, he murmured in a low voice.

“I’ll do everything for you, Eun-soo.”

“Nng…”

“I’m going to do it all.”

Do-kwon’s low voice flowing through the air was seductive. Eun-soo swallowed hard, pressed his head against one shoulder, and looked up at Do-kwon.

Binding both of Eun-soo’s wrists with one hand, Do-kwon lowered his pants with the other.

Eun-soo stared intently. Although much time had passed, he remembered vividly what Do-kwon’s member looked like, how thick it was, and how it felt when it thrust into his back. He swallowed hard.

The thick member partially revealed itself. Do-kwon reached into his drawers and pulled his member out deliberately slowly. He seemed to know that Eun-soo was swallowing repeatedly while watching.

After several seconds that felt cruelly long, Do-kwon’s member finally emerged completely.

“Ah…”

Eun-soo let out a barely audible gasp of admiration. A healthy color. An immense thickness visible at a glance. A length that tightly filled Do-kwon’s large hand. A glossy, smooth glans. Bulging veins. And a thick, dense pheromone.

Just by facing Do-kwon’s member, Eun-soo ended up leaking a bit of semen. That was how imposing and magnificent it looked.

While Eun-soo was dazed and lost in thought, Do-kwon stroked his member up and down a couple of times. Then, he gripped Eun-soo’s member and his own together.

“Uwah!”

Startled, Eun-soo lifted his upper body. Do-kwon’s hard member and his own were pressed tightly together, rubbing. On one side, Do-kwon’s member, glowing with heat, and on the other, Do-kwon’s hard and slightly rough palm stimulated Eun-soo’s member wildly.

“Hng, ah, nng…”

Within a few minutes, Eun-soo felt a tingling sensation in his lower abdomen. He couldn’t tell if it was the urge to urinate or if he was reaching a climax. His toes curled inward, his shoulders kept rising toward his earlobes, and his knees pressed together.

A deep furrow appeared between Do-kwon’s brows as well. Even though it was fully erect, Eun-soo’s member felt strangely soft, almost like a tongue. It felt even more so because it was sticky and slippery due to the semen Eun-soo had previously released. Wanting to feel it more, he tightened his grip further and further.

“Hnnng, ah! It’s good, hng, nng…”

“Haa… Eun-soo…”

The moans the two let out intertwined without rhythm. The climax was approaching. Do-kwon’s member swelled even larger. He hurriedly approached Eun-soo’s lips. He felt that if Eun-soo’s breath were added to this pleasure, it would be even more ecstatic.

However, Eun-soo abruptly turned his head away.

Do-kwon froze. Despite his experience, he could never get used to Eun-soo’s rejection. The member he was holding and the body submerged in pleasure cooled down instantly. As the muscles in his entire body went limp, the fingers binding Eun-soo’s wrists loosened. Eun-soo immediately escaped from Do-kwon’s arm.

“…Eun-soo.”

Do-kwon called Eun-soo’s name in a hollow voice. But Eun-soo, as if he couldn’t hear him, shifted his body. Do-kwon pulled his body away from Eun-soo.

Then, as if he had been waiting, Eun-soo grabbed the back of his own knees. He lifted his legs high. Eun-soo’s bare buttocks were fully exposed. Of course, the twitching, deep pink folds between them were also revealed.

Startled by Eun-soo’s sudden action, Do-kwon tucked his chin in, but Eun-soo spoke haltingly with a flushed face.

“Not… not there, here… please cum here…”

Eun-soo was not satisfied. What was the point of having a heat cycle? It wasn’t just about letting out scream-like moans of pleasure and climaxing while shaking his member. He had to receive an Alpha’s semen. Only when his back hole was filled tight, when his stomach sloshed with the Alpha’s—Do-kwon’s—semen, would this piercing thirst be quenched.

“…”

Do-kwon blinked with a foolish expression. Then, he laughed lowly, a mixture of emptiness and relief. He readily grabbed Eun-soo’s buttocks. He slowly rubbed the glans against Eun-soo’s back hole.

“Ah-nng…”

Eun-soo trembled with his eyes half-closed. It felt indescribably good to have Do-kwon’s hard glans rub and mash against the folds. He wanted him to come inside quickly. Once that thick piece of flesh entered, his back would be full. He might even gag from the immense volume.

Eun-soo was so far gone that he actually looked forward to that gagging sensation.

Between the pre-cum Do-kwon leaked and the lubrication that flowed out whenever Eun-soo’s hole gasped, his back soon became erotic. A squelching sound echoed every time it interfaced with Do-kwon’s member.

“Hurry, hurry…”

Eun-soo reached out and scratched wildly at Do-kwon’s chest and forearms. He felt like he was going to die from the itch in his back hole. Do-kwon’s member, teasing him by almost entering but not quite, was infuriating. If it had been in front of his eyes, he might have bitten into it like meat.

However, Do-kwon wasn’t hesitating for no reason. In his heart, he wanted to shove his member in all the way and thrust roughly, but he was deeply worried about Eun-soo’s well-being.

It would surely hurt. No matter how much of a heat cycle it was, one couldn’t be completely oblivious to pain.

Slightly narrowing his eyes, Do-kwon pressed the glans against Eun-soo’s back, looking for an opening. The folds were soft, and every time the glans was bitten, the hole sucked him in further, with lubrication gushing out from the gaps.

Clenching his teeth, Do-kwon poked the glans into the hole. As expected.

“Hnnng…”

Eun-soo’s thighs stiffened. His relaxed eyes sharpened.

“It hurts, doesn’t it?”

Do-kwon asked, gently brushing Eun-soo’s hair back. Eun-soo quickly shook his head. But there was no way Do-kwon would be fooled by such a clumsy lie.

Just as Do-kwon was about to pull his hips back, Eun-soo suddenly sat up, hugged Do-kwon’s neck, and rubbed his forehead against his shoulder. Like a cat acting cute.

“Just… just do it.”

“I can’t.”

“You can!”

“Eun-soo.”

Do-kwon tried to soothe him by patting his back. Then, Eun-soo mumbled with a face full of grievance.

“If you put it in… if you put it in and shake it, it’ll… it’ll feel good soon…”

“…”

For a moment, Do-kwon caught his breath. Eun-soo’s beautiful face filled his vision. The reddish edges of his eyes, the shimmering tears, the eyelashes drooping from moisture, and the lips that had become bright red and plump from being sucked and bitten so much.

Do-kwon felt the reason that had briefly returned due to his concern for Eun-soo evaporate again. At the same time, Eun-soo’s eyes widened. This was because Do-kwon’s member, of which only the glans had entered, suddenly swelled.

“Oh… it got bigger…”

Before the startled Eun-soo could finish his sentence, Do-kwon gripped Eun-soo’s buttocks and pulled him down. Do-kwon’s member scraped the inner walls and slammed deep into the stomach in one go.

“Kh…”

Under the immense pressure, Eun-soo’s head snapped back. The arms that had been hugging Do-kwon’s neck stretched straight up like bamboo, and his legs shot upward as well. His member shot out semen in a direct stream as his prostate was crushed flat. He thrust so powerfully that semen even splashed up to Do-kwon’s chin.

“…”

Eun-soo couldn’t even breathe and trembled violently. Between the sudden stimulation, pleasure, and climax, it felt as if his already mushy brain was leaking out through his nostrils, ears, and eyes. His spine chilled. Just as his whole body felt a shiver, it became scorching hot again.

His member twitched. His thighs convulsed, and a ringing sound echoed in his ears. His back hole tightened tightly around Do-kwon’s member, and somehow, that stimulation returned to Eun-soo.

As Eun-soo remained trapped in the afterglow of the climax for a long time, Do-kwon, unable to wait any longer, supported Eun-soo’s buttocks and pulled his member out halfway.

Do-kwon’s prominently thick glans scraped through the taut inner walls like a rake. Startled, Eun-soo snapped back to his senses and tapped Do-kwon’s forearm repeatedly.

“Wait, just… just a moment, just a moment…”

“…”

But Do-kwon did not answer. His black pupils were clouded. It was a look he wasn’t used to, but had seen a few times.

The eyes seen in Do-kwon when he was in rut. Eyes that had completely lost reason. Eyes closer to a beast driven by lust than a human.

Eun-soo swallowed hard. His appropriately prominent Adam’s apple moved up and down. In an instant, Do-kwon’s pupils shrank to pinpricks, and he opened his mouth to take Eun-soo’s Adam’s apple inside. Do-kwon clearly had a neat set of human teeth, but Eun-soo felt like a small animal whose neck was being chewed by a predator.

As Eun-soo froze, unable to move, Do-kwon shoved the member he had partially withdrawn back in with a thud. Eun-soo let out a piercing moan.

After that, it was all pleasure. It was overwhelming, then ecstatic, then he wanted to die, then it was thrilling, then scary, then good. Even a rollercoaster wouldn’t have such extreme ups and downs.

Every time Do-kwon’s member slammed deep into his stomach. Every time those powerful hands squeezed his buttocks. Every time his thick testicles slapped against his crotch. Every time he was bound by that intense gaze, his emotions flipped like the palm of a hand.

But in the end, all emotions concluded in orgasm.

With his face completely slack, Eun-soo awkwardly shook his waist in time with Do-kwon’s movements. The hardness that crushed the inner walls and the thick volume that stretched the folds taut were so good he felt he might faint.

“Ahng, it’s good… Hng! It’s good, Do-kwon…”

Eun-soo trembled, rubbing his face against the nape of Do-kwon’s neck. Do-kwon left small bite marks on Eun-soo’s shoulder and thrust his hips even more violently.

The sound of flesh, wet with all sorts of fluids, sticking and separating echoed in a messy, squelching rhythm. It was so intense that even that sound felt like pleasure.

Semen bubbled up from the tip of Eun-soo’s member. The way it trickled down the shaft didn’t even seem like semen anymore. The correlation between pleasure and climax had long since broken. Now, every time Do-kwon hammered into his back hole, semen leaked from his urethra.

“Uang, nng, hng, hnnng…”

“Haa… Eun-soo…”

After holding Eun-soo and thrusting for a while, Do-kwon laid him on the sofa. He then gripped both of Eun-soo’s thighs and pulled his member out in one long motion. Eun-soo looked up at Do-kwon with a gaze mixed with fear and anticipation.

Do-kwon blew his bangs up. Then, as if to meet Eun-soo’s expectations, he clenched his teeth and shoved his member in deep. It was a deep insertion. Eun-soo’s buttocks were crushed flat under Do-kwon’s pelvis.

“Ugh…”

Eun-soo felt a pressure that seemed to crush not only his stomach but his lungs as well. He felt as if, if he opened his mouth wide, Do-kwon’s member would flow back up into his throat.

With his member buried deep in Eun-soo’s hole, Do-kwon moved his hips in small motions. As if pounding the inner walls with his member. Small, fast, and persistent. A pleasure slightly different from rough digging washed over Eun-soo.

“Hnnng, ah! Uang, ah, hng!”

“Haa, haa…”

Both of their brows were completely distorted. They were racing together toward the peak of pleasure. Then, Do-kwon pulled Eun-soo’s thighs toward himself and shoved his member in all the way. Flesh slapped together, and Eun-soo’s back hole took in his member without leaving a single gap.

“Ah, aaah…”

Eun-soo’s chin trembled violently as he swallowed his moans. He felt the thick, hot piece of flesh thrust deep inside him pulse, and soon, something searing and sticky filled his belly. He felt nauseous and a sloshing sensation in his gut, yet strangely, it was satisfying.

At that eerie sensation, Eun-soo also leaked semen in a steady stream.

The two of them floated in the ecstasy of climax for a moment. Do-kwon rested his body lightly atop Eun-soo. He pressed his lips against Eun-soo’s chin, collarbone, and shoulders—areas that were more prominent than others—before pulling away.

Meanwhile, Eun-soo stared up at the ceiling with vacant eyes. The geometrically shaped lights shifted from two to four, then flickered into blackness, repeating the cycle.

Watching this, he strangely began to cry. It happened even though he couldn’t feel any emotion other than the five senses provided by his body.

Tears rolled down Eun-soo’s cheeks. Seeing this, Do-kwon extended his tongue to lick the tears away and whispered.

“Eun-soo, I love you.”

“…….”

“I love you. I love you…….”

The low voice spoke of love incessantly. However, those desperate confessions could not pass through Eun-soo’s ears, which felt blocked by something. Eun-soo merely stared into the meaningless void, catching his breath in shallow gasps.

How much time had passed? Eun-soo reached out with a limp hand and stroked Do-kwon’s chest. Do-kwon, who had been burying his nose in the crook of Eun-soo’s neck to inhale his scent, flinched and lifted his head. Eun-soo looked into his black eyes and gave a faint, wry smile.

“Do it more.”

“…….”

“It’s still… still not enough…….”

It was a half-witted smile. Yet, tears continued to flow from the corners of his eyes. Faced with that bizarre and sorrowful gap, Do-kwon couldn’t help but smile back.

“……Alright.”

Do-kwon gave a short nod. Then, he gently wrapped his hand around Eun-soo’s thigh.

Anything you want. Even if the result of this act brings me one step closer to hell. In the end, I’ll be the one immersed in that hell anyway. If you want it, whatever it is, I’ll gladly do it.

* * *

Eun-soo slowly lifted his eyelids. His eyelids were heavily swollen, making it difficult to open his eyes. His body felt heavy too. He felt like a bloated corpse that had been fished out of the Han River after two months. His joints creaked. It was almost a miracle that he could put strength into his fingertips and toes.

Eun-soo struggled to gather his aching body and forced his vision to clear. A landscape that wasn’t quite familiar came into view.

It was Do-kwon’s house, but not his bedroom. The interior felt slightly brighter than the bedroom, and the bed felt narrow. It was the spare bedroom used as a guest room.

Eun-soo frowned slightly. What was this sudden change of scenery? Why was he here? He thought deeply.

His heat cycle had come. The sleeping pills hadn’t worked, so he hadn’t slept for several hours, and he had woken up with a fever that felt like his entire body was sizzling. Then, he had gone out to Do-kwon and… shown him exactly what a vulgar Omega was.

He had clung to Do-kwon’s body, begging and throwing a tantrum for him to have sex with him.

Eventually, they had mixed their bodies. They did it on the sofa, and even then, he had whined for more. So they did it again on the sofa, then in the bathroom, and after returning to the bedroom, they rolled around in a messy heap.

It was an act more promiscuous than that of an animal in heat. Just recalling the steamy memories sent shivers down his spine.

The sofa and bed were likely a mess. He had leaked semen like he was pissing himself. Besides that, the blankets and sheets were surely damp with sweat and tears.

He figured he had been brought here while a housekeeper was called to clean the bedroom, the sofa, and various other places.

What time was it? When exactly had his heat cycle started? Was the sandwich Do-kwon brought him lunch or dinner? He wasn’t sure.

Eun-soo glanced to the side. Do-kwon was beside him. He was curled up, his large body huddled as he hugged Eun-soo’s waist and buried his nose in his forearm.

“…….”

Eun-soo licked his dry lips. Then, he squeezed his eyes shut. He felt so embarrassed and ashamed that he wanted to die. In the end, his reason had been completely devoured by instinct again. The vulgar words he had poured out while clinging to Do-kwon came back to him with cruel clarity.

All sorts of self-loathing rushed in. The despair that he could never escape his identity as an Omega no matter how he struggled, and the hatred for himself for clinging to Do-kwon without a shred of shame, sliced through his limbs.

Eun-soo ground his teeth in irritation. For the first time in a while, he craved death. His wrists felt itchy, and he wanted to see hot blood. At this rate, craving death would become more familiar than craving food.

As Eun-soo let out a heavy, thick sigh, a firm and warm palm gently stroked his waist. Eun-soo’s body stiffened.

“Why are you up already? Sleep more.”

Do-kwon whispered lowly. Then, he patted Eun-soo’s chest. Eun-soo stared blankly at him.

It had been a very long time since he had lain in a bed naked with Do-kwon. Not that it had been a long time since they had sex—well, that was true too—but regardless. It had been a very long time since they had been this close, naked, without any words, simply acknowledging each other’s presence.

In the past, even after a messy encounter, they would stay clung together for a long time, idling. They would share various conversations, gaze blankly at each other’s faces bathed in moonlight, occasionally kiss and whisper love, or just hug tightly, not knowing how to express their overflowing love.

He had been… truly happy. It was a time of no lack, no deficiency. The bed became the world, and Do-kwon by his side became everything.

As Eun-soo’s unfocused eyes drifted irregularly between the present and the past, Do-kwon gently stroked his cheek.

“Can’t you sleep?”

“…….”

Eun-soo answered with a nod. He was tired, and he had a headache, perhaps because of the sleeping pills, but he didn’t want to fall asleep again.

At that, Do-kwon sat up. The warm body heat that had been enveloping Eun-soo vanished. That feeling was strangely disappointing, so Eun-soo rubbed his own forearm.

Leaving the bed, Do-kwon prepared something with a rustling sound at the small tea table by the window. Eun-soo merely lifted his head slightly and looked at Do-kwon’s broad back. Then, he gasped.

Do-kwon’s back… was a mess.

Colorful bruises were scattered all over his skin. Like mold on a piece of bread. Or like a Jackson Pollock painting. It looked painful just by looking at it. It was a miracle he was moving as if nothing were wrong.

While wondering why Do-kwon’s back was like that, Eun-soo soon recalled the reason. The image of Do-kwon tumbling down the stairs while holding him flashed before his eyes.

Eun-soo squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again. Do-kwon returned to him. In his hand were two thick pills and a glass of water. He held them out right in front of Eun-soo’s nose. Eun-soo tilted his head.

Were they sleeping pills? But the heat cycle was already over. Was he giving them to him because he said he couldn’t sleep?

As Eun-soo hesitated, unable to take the medicine impulsively, Do-kwon spoke softly.

“Emergency contraception.”

“Ah…….”

Eun-soo let out a short gasp. It was a medicine he knew well, but it had been a very long time since he had heard its name. Emergency contraception. He had been in heat and had received an Alpha’s—specifically, a Dominant Alpha’s—semen in his rear, so he had to take it to avoid an unintended pregnancy.

Otherwise, he would have to… have a baby.

Eun-soo unconsciously stroked his own stomach. He felt both a sense of regret and relief that his stomach was flat. His fingertips twitched, and he sat up to take the medicine Do-kwon offered. He popped them into his mouth and gulped down the entire glass of water.

The pills felt exceptionally thick and painful as they went down his throat. It felt as if the medicine were using claws to scratch his esophagus.

As Eun-soo swallowed dryly several times, Do-kwon asked worriedly.

“Do you want more water?”

Eun-soo shook his head. A brief silence followed. Do-kwon, having returned the empty glass to the table, sat on the edge of the bed and observed Eun-soo with concerned eyes. His expression seemed to say he knew exactly what Eun-soo was thinking and what emotions he was feeling.

From that gaze, Eun-soo felt an overwhelming amount of shame and apology.

“……I’m sorry.”

Eun-soo apologized in a suppressed voice.

“Huh?”

Do-kwon asked back as if he had misheard. Somehow, even that felt like a condemnation, forcing Eun-soo to tighten his throat further.

“About what happened yesterday, and your back… I’m sorry. I… I wasn’t in my right mind…….”

“Eun-soo.”

“I know you don’t like excuses, but that’s all I can say…….”

How ridiculous must it be? How pathetic? How vulgar and disgusting must he look, panting like a beast instead of a human, bewitched by pheromones. He had pushed Do-kwon away and resented him while pretending to be so dignified. In the end, this was the result.

Eun-soo rubbed his face harshly with both hands. He rubbed so hard that the tip of his nose and his cheeks turned red. Then, Do-kwon lightly grabbed Eun-soo’s wrists to stop the self-harming behavior.

“Why are you sorry for that? You don’t have to be.”

“But…….”

“I told you I’d do whatever you want. I told you to use me like a dog.”

Despite Do-kwon’s extreme words, Eun-soo’s tearful face didn’t brighten.

Do-kwon’s eyebrows furrowed in sympathy. After contemplating something while watching Eun-soo’s reaction, he spoke seriously, as if a good idea had occurred to him.

“I’m always welcome to be used as a masturbation tool. I’d ask for nothing more if you treated me as a sex partner.”

“……Wha-what did you say?”

Astonishment flooded Eun-soo’s eyes. Use him as… what? A masturbation tool? He hadn’t understood the part about using him like a dog, but he had adapted to it. But what was a masturbation tool? Did he mean something like a dildo? Something he knew existed but had never actually seen? So… did he mean to use his body, his genitals, like a dildo? And being treated as a sex partner was the closest thing to being treated as a human?

Eun-soo forgot his depression and stared blankly, lost in thought. At this, Do-kwon smiled awkwardly. His original intention was for Eun-soo to scoff or be disgusted, asking if he was crazy, but he figured it was fine since he had pulled him out of the well of depression.

Do-kwon gently stroked the backs of Eun-soo’s hands with his thumbs.

“I liked it, Eun-soo.”

“…….”

“How could I not like it, kissing you and rubbing my body against yours? I even had the wicked thought that I wished your heat cycle wouldn’t end tomorrow, or the day after.”

“…….”

“I mean, it’s not something you should feel sorry about at all.”

Do-kwon gave a mischievous grin. His words and expression were completely mismatched. While Eun-soo could only gape, unable to find the words to respond, Do-kwon sat a hand’s breadth closer to him.

“Not being in your right mind. What’s wrong with that? It happens. That’s what heat cycles are for.”

“…….”

Eun-soo’s shoulders flinched at the overly generous words. That’s what heat cycles are for. It was true. Alphas and Omegas were beings created by a god worried about human extinction, designed to lose their minds and produce offspring. It would be stranger to remain perfectly sane during a heat cycle.

Thinking that, the furrow in his brow loosened. Not missing the chance, Do-kwon quickly added.

“Do you remember when I was in rut?”

“Which rut? It’s not like it was your first or second time…….”

“Uh… the rainy day. At your house.”

“Ah…….”

Eun-soo recalled a very distant memory. It was during the height of the monsoon season. It was likely the second rut they had experienced together. Because of that, he had taken annual leave in advance and they had stayed at his house all day. Until the rut hit, they had lain hugged on the narrow sofa watching movies and drinking wine in the evening. Then, once the rut hit, he and Do-kwon had rolled around wildly until the next day.

Eun-soo nodded lightly, indicating he remembered. Then, with an excited face, Do-kwon subtly entwined and released his fingers with Eun-soo’s and said.

“Back then, I acted like a beast, so you kicked me right in the head.”

“I-I did?”

“Don’t you remember? You hit me so hard I fell to the floor.”

Eun-soo frowned. He had kicked Do-kwon in the head? He had no such memory. Eun-soo tilted his head. Then, his eyes flashed as if he remembered something.

Right, that had happened. During the act, an excited Do-kwon had suddenly bitten his wiggling toes. It wouldn’t have mattered if he had just nipped them, but he had bitten down so hard that Eun-soo had screamed. Recalling the pain from back then, Eun-soo’s shoulders shuddered.

“That was because you bit my toes!”

“Right, that day. I did that because I wasn’t in my right mind either.”

“…….”

“Normally, it would have stayed as a fantasy. But when the rut hit, I really wanted to chew you up.”

Do-kwon narrowed his eyes and smacked his lips. Back then, Eun-soo’s smooth toes had looked so delicious. Dyed in pink, they were like ripe fruit. He had wanted to pluck them off and eat them. Since he wasn’t in his right mind, he had actually put it into practice.

If a horrified Eun-soo hadn’t kicked him away, that day… he might have had to go to the hospital with Eun-soo and a severed toe.

As Do-kwon alternated between feeling relieved and regretful every second, smacking his lips again.

“Pfft…….”

Eun-soo suddenly let out a small laugh. It wasn’t a loud laugh. To a casual listener, it would have been hard to tell if it was a sigh or a laugh.

But to Do-kwon, that laugh felt immense. His heart throbbed. He was almost afraid that if Eun-soo laughed one more time, his heart would burst and he would die.

Whether Eun-soo knew this or not, he kept the corners of his mouth raised and softly scolded Do-kwon.

“Just how do you get the idea to chew on toes?”

“Why, yesterday I thought I wanted to chew on your nipples. I wanted to put them in my mouth and suck them like pacifiers all day.”

At those words, Eun-soo pulled his chin back and looked at Do-kwon with a disgusted expression.

“……Sometimes you’re really like a pervert.”

“I am a pervert. I’m very surprised you didn’t know until now.”

Do-kwon countered slyly. It wasn’t a lie. That he hadn’t known he was a pervert—it was truly surprising. If he were to list the things he imagined about him, Eun-soo would realize it instantly. But if he did that, Eun-soo would probably abandon him and run away, so he decided to keep quiet.

While Do-kwon planned another ridiculous scheme in secret, Eun-soo shook his head. Then, he flopped down onto the bed.

“Ugh… enough. I’m going to sleep. In the meantime, Do-kwon, put some medicine on your… back.”

Eun-soo gradually pulled the blanket up to the top of his head. Do-kwon smiled silently, watching the shifting blanket.

“My back is fine. You don’t have to worry.”

“……Fine, then.”

Eun-soo seemed to actually intend to sleep; he tossed and turned for a moment and then settled into a comfortable position. Feeling somewhat disappointed, Do-kwon desperately tried to continue the broken conversation.

“Um… aren’t you hungry? There’s a lot of delicious stuff in the fridge. We could eat out too.”

“I’ll eat when I wake up.”

“Does your body… does it hurt, or do you have a fever?”

“No. I’m fine.”

At the curt answer, Do-kwon made a sullen face. But what could he do? If they were in a sweet lover’s relationship like before, he would have whined for him not to sleep or burrowed into his arms and squeezed his buttocks, but now. Not yet.

“Eun-soo.”

“……Yes.”

“Sleep well.”

Do-kwon pressed his lips firmly against the blanket covering Eun-soo’s face before pulling away. He felt Eun-soo’s body flinch beneath the blanket. However, he surprisingly didn’t push Do-kwon away or scold him.

At that, Do-kwon’s sinking mood soared instantly. Do-kwon lay down beside Eun-soo with movements that suited adverbs like ‘stealthily’ and ‘cautiously.’

Then, he focused all his attention on the barely audible sound of Eun-soo’s breathing. Doing so, time passed with surprising speed. The moment he felt his eyelids grow heavy, they closed in an instant.

Somehow, Do-kwon fell asleep before Eun-soo. I wonder if he knew. Eun-soo peeked out from under the blanket. His large eyes gazed intently at Do-kwon.

“…….”

Eun-soo watched the sleeping Do-kwon for a very long time. Looking at him, he had a thought.

A thought that the Do-kwon who had lost his memory and the current Do-kwon were… very different.

Eun-soo was bored. He couldn’t have been more bored. Sleeping, eating, and watching TV shows that didn’t interest him was so tedious it was almost irritating. Having lived a busy life since his school days, he had no immunity to this kind of endless leisure.

Immediately after his parents’ death, after the car accident, after the miscarriage, and even after the suicide attempt, there had been moments of leisure, but those were closer to a temporary pause than actual leisure. A time when he had put his life and daily existence on hold and remained holed up in a hospital.

Now was completely different from then.

Eun-soo irritably switched off the TV, where celebrities were sitting around laughing. Tossing the remote carelessly onto the sofa, he tilted his head back over the headrest and let out a guttural “Huu…” like a sigh. The silent living room reflected his sigh back at him.

Do-kwon had left about an hour ago, saying he would buy dinner. Without that massive frame around, and with the faint scent of his pheromones disappearing, the already present emptiness expanded until it felt large enough to crush Eun-soo.

I’m so bored. I feel so suffocated. I’m depressed. I feel like I’m going to die. I feel like a prisoner in a cell. It feels like the house is eating me alive.

Unable to take it any longer, Eun-soo sprang up. Without grabbing a coat, or even his phone—which had been missing for some time—he strode toward the front door.

He didn’t intend to leave for good; he just wanted to take a walk around the neighborhood. To see if there was anywhere he wanted to go or anything he wanted to do. He simply intended to get some fresh air to clear his suffocated chest.

Just as Eun-soo was sliding his feet into his shoes, the sound of the door lock clicking echoed, and the door swung open. Do-kwon had returned at an impeccable moment. In his hands were three heavy-looking paper bags. He had likely raided several restaurants, not knowing what Eun-soo might want to eat.

Finding Eun-soo standing at the entrance, Do-kwon’s eyes widened. Soon, veils of bewilderment, confusion, worry, and fear layered over his handsome face.

Regardless, Eun-soo finished putting on his sneakers.

“I’m going out.”

“What? Why, why all of a sudden?”

Dropping the paper bags carelessly, Do-kwon stepped forward to block Eun-soo’s path. While he couldn’t exactly describe Eun-soo’s mood lately as ‘good,’ he thought it had improved significantly compared to before. He couldn’t understand this sudden desire to go out.

Missiles began raining down on Do-kwon’s peacefully flowing world. Bang, bang—everything was exploding and breaking, on the verge of total destruction.

Eun-soo stared blankly at Do-kwon, whose face was now completely distorted. Then, with a long sigh, he turned his head away.

“No, I’m just going outside. I feel suffocated. I’m just going to take a walk around.”

“…”

“I’ll… be back soon.”

The last sentence was spoken in a voice so small it would have been hard to hear if one wasn’t listening intently. However, to Do-kwon, who was focusing all his attention on Eun-soo, it sounded as clear as an eloquent speech. His shoulders, which had been tense with anxiety and vigilance, suddenly dropped.

Having finished speaking, Eun-soo reached for the doorknob. But a large hand covered the back of Eun-soo’s hand. Frowning slightly, Eun-soo looked up at Do-kwon. What now. Why. I already explained. I said I’d come back. His gaze was faintly laced with irritation.

Do-kwon licked his dry lips. Then, as if making a very difficult and shameless request, he spoke with a nuance of not knowing what to do with himself.

“Um… can I, can I come with you?”

“…”

“I’ll just follow you quietly from behind.”

“…”

Eun-soo let out a hollow laugh.

With that build, and with an appearance that practically overflowed with the aura of a Dominant Alpha, he claimed he would just follow quietly. Eun-soo wondered if that was even possible. However, he didn’t bother to argue. He knew all too well that trying to present logical arguments to Do-kwon regarding himself was utterly useless.

Even if he said No or You can’t, Do-kwon would likely follow him secretly after he left. So, Eun-soo simply said,

“Whatever.”

After tossing out a casual word, he left the house. He could feel Do-kwon following behind him like a Golden Retriever excited for a walk.

Summer had taken over the world without anyone noticing. The beating sun was beyond intense; it was stinging, and the scorching ground seeped through the soles of his sneakers to the bottoms of his feet.

Eun-soo wrinkled his nose. He had come out for fresh air, but it looked like he was going to get heatstroke instead.

Still, not wanting the effort of coming out to go to waste, Eun-soo took a wide loop around the neighborhood. Since Do-kwon’s house was located near Gangnam and Teheran-ro, there were many things to see. Unlike the bustling Gangnam Station, this street had a relaxed and quiet charm.

Small but luxurious galleries, large and small cafes with signs written in curly script, well-maintained flower beds, and office workers with ID badges around their necks heading somewhere.

Eun-soo walked slowly, observing them. Occasionally, he glanced back. Do-kwon was following him at a distance of about three steps. He didn’t strike up a conversation, nor did he get closer. He was executing his promise to ‘follow quietly’ perfectly.

After a few minutes, Eun-soo stopped paying attention to Do-kwon. In fact, it became comfortable. Although it was a neighborhood with many Alphas and there could be strangers lurking anywhere, what was there to worry about when the person behind him was none other than Do-kwon? It felt like he had gained a reliable bodyguard.

After walking for a while, just as sweat began to bead on his forehead, Eun-soo stopped in front of a building. It was a cafe that looked like a converted large two-story house; with flowers blooming throughout the garden and the large balcony windows wide open, it looked quite inviting.

What caught his eye most was the sign listing [Popular Menu] [Ricotta Cheese Salad] [Rosé Pasta] [Tteokbokki] [Milk Shaved Ice] [Cream Puffs]. It was a very harmonious sign where one could solve everything from appetizers to the main course and dessert in one go.

Eun-soo swallowed and muttered to himself.

“…Tteokbokki.”

It had been a long time since he’d eaten it. Thinking of the rice cakes soaked in sweet and spicy sauce, he suddenly felt hungry. As Eun-soo chewed on his lower lip, Do-kwon, who had approached silently, asked tentatively.

“Shall we eat?”

“…”

“It would be perfect to eat everything on the menu. Right? It’s like they only picked the things you like.”

Do-kwon murmured as if it were a marvel. Eun-soo instinctively nodded in agreement, then flinched. As he tried to take a step back, Do-kwon gestured toward the cafe.

“Let’s go in, Eun-soo.”

“…I’m fine.”

“It’s hot. Wouldn’t it be nice to eat tteokbokki, have some shaved ice, walk a bit more, buy coffee from a cafe you like, and then go home?”

“…”

Eun-soo pressed his lips together. Do-kwon really… knew him too well. If he followed the sequence of plans Do-kwon had listed and then went home, he felt he might be happy for the first time in a long while. Eun-soo’s fingertips twitched, expressing his hesitation. Then, Do-kwon gently pushed Eun-soo’s back. Reluctantly, Eun-soo entered the cafe.

After polishing off the salad, pasta, and tteokbokki, Eun-soo finally encountered the milk shaved ice. A kind clerk even gave him a handful of injeolmi rice cake toppings as a service.

Eun-soo ate heartily. The shaved ice was so cold it gave him a brain freeze, but that pain actually made him feel good. Eun-soo diligently moved his spoon while watching the people outside the window.

It was already well past 6 PM. People from the offices were pouring out into the streets. He saw many groups huddled together, looking around as if choosing a place for a company dinner.

“…”

I used to be like that too. Days of wearing a suit, going to an office, looking forward to the end of the workday, gathering for dinners with teammates, and falling asleep as if fainting once he got home.

The characteristic smell of an office. The sound of typing and phone calls filling a wide space with people, and the subtle scent of coffee.

Suddenly, he missed those times intensely. As Eun-soo stopped his spoon and stared blankly outside, Do-kwon, who had been drinking coffee, placed his interlaced hands on the table.

“Eun-soo.”

“…Yes.”

Eun-soo, whose soul was still captivated by the outside, answered a beat late.

“I have a favor to ask.”

At those words, Eun-soo’s gaze finally turned toward Do-kwon. A favor from Do-kwon. He had known him for several years now, but this was the first time Do-kwon had ever asked him for a favor. Even when they were lovers, Do-kwon had never asked for even a small thing. What could a man who had everything and lacked nothing possibly ask for?

That was why Do-kwon’s words were so surprising. Eun-soo put down his spoon and focused on him. Regardless of whether he would grant it or not, he was simply curious about what Do-kwon would ask.

Seeing Eun-soo’s intense interest, Do-kwon smiled slightly and spoke.

“Seong-jin Construction has been tasked with building a new city in the Philippines.”

“…”

“The reason the Philippines chose a Korean company wasn’t because of the construction, but to install Korea’s unrivaled internet technology. They wanted a ubiquitous information and communication environment applied to the new city.”

“Yes. And?”

“So, we installed computers in the houses, appliances, cars, and roads, and they’re working well. The Philippine side seems very satisfied.”

“…”

“But the UI design isn’t finished yet. As you know, Eun-soo, for consistency and accessibility, the icons on all devices must have the same design. We put a lot of effort into it, but the Philippine side doesn’t seem to like what we made.”

“…”

“They say the city was built to be flashy, so they don’t like that the apps are too flat.”

“Well… they probably said they want a design that is moderately flashy yet clean.”

Eun-soo replied with a snort. It was a request he had heard countless times. Modern yet vintage. Vivid. Bright. Black, but not dark. Legible, but sophisticated. With a modern feel. Not tacky even in the future. These were the typical demands of clients who knew nothing about design.

“Exactly. Flashy yet clean.”

Do-kwon nodded.

Eun-soo let out a groan. He figured the old fossils holding the decision-making power had rejected the flat design. They probably didn’t like seeing only white or black icons floating around in a city that cost trillions of won to build.

People like that had specific desires. They didn’t even know exactly what those were, so they just threw in every word that sounded good and demanded it.

Feeling suffocated just listening to it, Eun-soo clicked his tongue. Do-kwon leaned forward and whispered softly.

“So, I was wondering… how about you try doing it?”

“…Me?”

Eun-soo’s eyes widened.

“When you were a team leader at the headquarters, you occasionally handled designs for other affiliates too.”

“But…”

“You don’t have to do everything. If you just set the guidelines, the company’s design team will fill in the rest.”

“…”

“You just need to design the main color palette, fonts, direction, and the overall mood.”

“…”

Eun-soo’s fingers tapped the table like he was playing a piano. He seemed to be contemplating Do-kwon’s proposal. However, the answer didn’t come easily. Becoming impatient, Do-kwon spoke again.

“Of course, I’ll pay you. As much as you want…”

“I can’t. Design changes so quickly. It’s been over two years since I quit.”

Eun-soo slowly shook his head. He would like to work, and he had thought about wanting to do design again someday, but not this suddenly. He needed to study and look into recent trends. He needed to write a resume; in any case, this wasn’t how he should decide.

At Eun-soo’s refusal, Do-kwon clenched and unclenched his fist. Then he tried to persuade him again.

“The Philippines probably isn’t looking for the latest design. Everything made that way has already been rejected.”

“That… may be true, but…”

“If you try it and it’s not working, you can stop. Just try it first. You don’t necessarily need to produce a final result. If you don’t release anything to the world, no one will know that you started the work and then quit.”

“…”

Hesitation filled Eun-soo’s eyes again. He bit the inside of his cheek and then let go.

Actually, he wanted to. He did. Even if it wasn’t work brought by Do-kwon, he just wanted to do something. He wanted to turn on the computer and see the black screens of Illustrator and Photoshop. He wanted to move the mouse until his fingers tingled.

Noticing Eun-soo’s hesitation, Do-kwon coaxed him in a gentle voice.

“Eun-soo. You are talented.”

“…”

“You’ve studied enough. You worked hard. I just think it’s a waste to let it rot like this, doing nothing.”

“…”

“Think of it as getting your feel back before you start working again, and just give it a try.”

Do-kwon knew that Eun-soo was bored staying at home. While he hoped Eun-soo would do something and find his vitality again, he also had the selfish thought that he wanted Eun-soo to do nothing and stay in his house all day.

But he couldn’t do that.

Do-kwon’s ultimate goal was to return to the past. To the time when he and Eun-soo were lovers. To the happiest time of his life. For that to happen, Eun-soo had to be happy as well.

If he locked him up like a bird in a cage, Eun-soo could not be happy, no matter how luxurious that cage was. Therefore, he had to leave the cage door wide open, so that Eun-soo could go out when the sun rose and return when it set.

“…”

Resting his chin on the table, Eun-soo looked out the window. He was truly… envious of the office workers with fatigue hanging all over their faces. Others might say he was crazy, but since he was on the verge of going crazy, it wasn’t a wrong statement.

Eun-soo agonized over it for a long time after that. Long enough for the milk shaved ice to melt completely into water. Do-kwon didn’t say another word and waited quietly until he reached a decision.

After some time had passed, Eun-soo slowly spoke.

“I’ll… try it.”

At those words, a bright smile bloomed on Do-kwon’s lips.

* * *

The next day, Do-kwon immediately brought a mountain of documents from the company. He brought everything: materials related to the new city, exterior views of buildings, furniture designs, emails exchanged between the Philippine side and the design team, and even canceled design drafts. He seemed more excited than Eun-soo, who was actually starting the work.

Eun-soo examined the materials Do-kwon brought without a word. He set up in the study, categorized the documents, and organized the computer files. It took two full days just to look through them.

He was so focused that he only realized how late it was when Do-kwon tentatively mentioned around 2 AM that it was time to sleep.

Even lying in bed, Eun-soo continued to think about work. It got to the point where the new city, which he had never even visited, unfolded in 3D before his eyes. The next day, and the day after that, Eun-soo remained holed up in the study and didn’t come out.

Do-kwon knocked on the study door. Then, like a mother with a child preparing for exams, he entered the room carefully. On the tray he held were colorful tarts, three slices of cake, and a warm cup of tea.

Eun-soo glanced at Do-kwon and then turned his gaze back to the monitor. Do-kwon placed the tray on the corner of the desk.

“Eat this while you work.”

“Thanks.”

Eun-soo replied monotonically. His pupils moved busily left and right as he looked at the dual monitors. Do-kwon gazed at him intently.

Eun-soo had a different charm when he worked. While he was usually rich in expression and emotion, he maintained a complete blank face when working. Sometimes his face was so devoid of emotion it was almost chilling. Then, occasionally, he would furrow his brow or glare at the monitor as if it were an enemy.

It was so… sexy.

If it were possible, he wanted to sit next to him and watch all day. When they worked at the same company, he had once had the reckless thought of installing a large, high-resolution camera above the 14th-floor UI design team. Because he wanted to see Eun-soo working. When he mentioned it to Secretary Jeong, the secretary had reacted with horror, saying he’d be arrested by the police, so the plan fell through.

Returning to reality after reminiscing about the past, Do-kwon moved the teacup in front of Eun-soo and asked.

“How… is it?”

“I don’t think it’ll be too difficult.”

“Really?”

“Yes. What these elderly government clients want isn’t ‘great’ design. Even if I make it haphazardly, if I explain it vaguely—saying this symbolizes the tower, the landmark of the new city, and that one takes its colors from the Philippine flag—they’ll say they like it.”

Eun-soo chatted away. Do-kwon stared intently at those plump lips moving busily. He couldn’t even count how long it had been since Eun-soo had spoken at such length.

“…I see.”

Do-kwon answered a beat late. In truth, Do-kwon didn’t particularly care how the design turned out or whether the client accepted it. He simply needed something to bring vitality back to Eun-soo; after much deliberation, he had created some work for him.

That didn’t mean he doubted Eun-soo’s abilities. He would likely do a great job. Eun-soo was born with a keen artistic sense.

Eun-soo sipped his tea, his mouse clicking busily. Seeing this, a look of concern clouded Do-kwon’s face.

“Do your hands… not hurt?”

At those words, Eun-soo’s movements came to a dead stop. He looked down at his hand gripping the mouse. After moving the mouse and typing on the keyboard for days on end, a tingling sensation ran from his wrist to his fingertips. Since he often struggled even with chopsticks, it would have been stranger if he weren’t in pain after pushing himself this hard.

“…….”

However, Eun-soo did not readily admit to the pain. He feared Do-kwon would make a huge fuss and forbid him from working.

He didn’t want that. While he was debating whether he should lie and say it didn’t hurt, Do-kwon gently stroked his shoulder.

“Don’t overdo it.”

“…….”

“Make sure to stretch every now and then. Or… would you like to try going for some physical therapy?”

At Do-kwon’s suggestion, the nape of Eun-soo’s neck stiffened. Do-kwon used his large hand to softly rub Eun-soo’s neck.

“It won’t hurt much. Just a bit tedious and bothersome. We can try it a few times, and if there’s no improvement, we’ll stop. Just for a little while, something light.”

Do-kwon had wanted to treat Eun-soo’s wrists for a long time. However, not knowing when or how to bring it up to get him to agree, he had postponed it until now.

Seeing Eun-soo prefer forks over chopsticks, seeing him instinctively avoid side dishes that were difficult to pick up, and seeing him unconsciously rub his wrists whenever the weather turned bad—it pained Do-kwon so much that he wanted to take him to a hospital as soon as possible.

It was only because he knew how much Eun-soo hated hospitals that he hadn’t spoken up. He felt that now, Eun-soo might be open to treatment. He knew that once Eun-soo started something, he wanted to complete it perfectly. If the pain in his wrists was hindering him, he would surely want them treated.

Hesitation filled Eun-soo’s eyes. Do-kwon waited quietly until he reached a decision.

After a long silence, Eun-soo slowly nodded.

“……Can we go on the weekend?”

“Of course. Anytime. We’ll go whenever you want.”

“……Okay.”

At the slow affirmation, Do-kwon’s eyebrows arched.

By giving Eun-soo work, he had gained a great deal. He had brought vitality to his boring daily life, made him abandon any thought of leaving his side, and even managed to get him to agree to treat his wrists.

Later, he planned to suggest treatment to remove the scars on his wrists. The scars on Eun-soo’s soft, white skin were an eyesore. Such things didn’t suit Eun-soo. Everything had to be restored to how it was before.

“Good choice. Since we’re going out, let’s eat something delicious. Shall we go shopping too? Let’s buy some summer clothes and maybe a tablet or something you need for work.”

Do-kwon spoke excitedly with a broad smile. Eun-soo smiled back awkwardly.

Do-kwon handed Eun-soo a fork. It wasn’t a small dessert fork, but a large one for salad. It was difficult to describe Eun-soo eating cake as simply “eating.” Words like “scooping” or “shoveling” were more fitting.

In fact, he had considered bringing a whole cake, but decided against it fearing it would interfere with dinner. He had compromised on three slices. Tarts were a separate matter.

Eun-soo took a large scoop of Sachertorte, which had a thick chocolate coating, and brought it to his mouth. His plump, puffed-out cheeks couldn’t have been more adorable.

Do-kwon leaned down slightly to meet Eun-soo’s eyes.

“Eun-soo.”

“Yes?”

Eun-soo answered with a mumble. Unable to resist that loveliness, Do-kwon lightly stroked the plump cheek with his thumb. He found it hard to pull himself away from something so pretty.

“I’m going to take care of some work for a moment. Keep eating your cake. If it’s not enough, there’s more in the fridge.”

“……Okay.”

Eun-soo nodded. He didn’t bother asking why. It wasn’t as if he didn’t know what Do-kwon did or how busy he was. Besides, Do-kwon had barely gone to the office since they started seeing each other. He simply figured there was something that needed handling.

Do-kwon headed toward the study door. Eun-soo gazed at him blankly. Watching that broad back recede gave him a strange feeling. He realized it had been a very long time since he had watched Do-kwon’s back as he left for somewhere.

Back when Do-kwon had lost his memory. He had seen it countless times then. He had cried and clutched his chest while looking at that magnificent back.

Recalling those times, his heart suddenly sank. An inexplicable anxiety surged—the fear that Do-kwon might not return, and that he might be left alone again.

Unable to ignore that futile anxiety, Eun-soo called out to stop him.

“Do-kwon.”

“Yeah?”

“Will you be… late?”

Even after saying it, Eun-soo felt like sewing his mouth shut. He was embarrassed. He felt like a frightened child who couldn’t stay home alone. Then, he pressed his lips together firmly.

No, what’s wrong with that? He can ask. It’s not like he asked something he shouldn’t. It’s just a normal thing people say to each other.

“…….”

Do-kwon gazed intently at Eun-soo, whose expression was shifting by the second. It was obvious what was going through that pretty, small head.

Do-kwon smiled faintly and shook his head.

“No. No way. I’ll be back soon.”

At those words, the worry vanished from Eun-soo’s face. Do-kwon wanted to ruffle his hair. Clenching his tingling palms, Do-kwon left the study.

After closing the door carefully, Do-kwon took his phone out of his pocket. He dialed a familiar number. The call was picked up before the second ring.

“Secretary Jeong. I’m leaving now.”

With a grim expression, Do-kwon strode out of the house with long strides.

* * *

The VIP floor of the hospital was silent. It was that languid time when the sunset begins to seep in, so it seemed everyone was taking a nap.

Stepping off the elevator, Do-kwon walked down the hallway, putting on leather gloves. Secretary Jeong and two other burly men followed behind him. At a glance, they didn’t look like people coming for a friendly hospital visit.

“How did that bastard find out where Eun-soo is?”

Do-kwon asked Secretary Jeong.

“Actually, he looked for the Director before he looked for Team Leader Yoo.”

Secretary Jeong answered in a monotone voice.

“For me?”

“Yes. After being released as a model prisoner, he found out that Team Leader Yoo had died, and it seems he was deeply shocked. Whether he wanted to confront the Director or resent him, he searched for you, but the Director was….”

“I was?”

“You were far too fine.”

Do-kwon’s brisk pace came to a halt. Frowning, he looked at Secretary Jeong with disapproval.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well… by ‘fine,’ I don’t mean you looked happy or joyful, but… uh… you were working regularly, and your face in the media looked perfectly normal, which must have seemed strange. Especially since it was Team Leader Yoo who passed… away. It would have been more fitting for you to be skin and bones, wasting away in a psychiatric ward.”

“And?”

“So, he spent a few days lingering around the company trying to see you. He spied from the underground parking lot, the cafe in front of the office, and the benches. Then he must have realized you weren’t coming into work. After that, he went to your house….”

“Don’t tell me….”

Irritation filled Do-kwon’s eyes. Secretary Jeong nodded with a somber face.

“Yes. He must have seen you heading toward Gyeonggi-do and followed you.”

“……Ah, fuck.”

Do-kwon pressed his throbbing temples firmly with his thumb and middle finger. Unintentionally, he had personally guided that piece of shit right to Eun-soo. Irritation and anger, as well as self-loathing, surged within him.

Do-kwon moved forward, huffing like an enraged bull. He reaffirmed his resolve, over and over, that he would absolutely kill this bastard.

“It’s here.”

Secretary Jeong pointed to a hospital room. It was the room with the nameplate [Seo Seong-heon].

Do-kwon stopped abruptly. Then, one of the men pulled a small container from his coat. At a glance, it looked like an eyeglass case. It opened sideways, just like one.

The man opened the container and held it out to Do-kwon. Inside was a single, sleek syringe.

Do-kwon took it. Then, another man opened the room door. Courtesies like knocking were omitted. This was a task that had to be carried out secretly but boldly, and quickly.

Do-kwon entered the room. The two men followed. Secretary Jeong stood with his back to the closed door. Since they had alerted the hospital in advance, there wasn’t a single soul passing by, but he stood guard just in case.

The room, drenched in the deep red of the sunset, was spacious. It was excessively luxurious and clean. Instead of the smell of disinfectant, there was a subtle scent of scented candles. It felt entirely alien for a place housing a patient who had been in a coma until yesterday.

The patient—Seong-heon—was asleep. The thick bandages wrapped around his head showed that he was not in a normal state.

During the struggle at the gallery, a large shard of glass had embedded itself in the back of Seong-heon’s head. He had undergone major surgery and had been unable to open his eyes for several weeks.

Do-kwon had intentionally not told Eun-soo. Eun-soo didn’t have the kind of personality to feel gratified by hearing that Seong-heon was on the verge of death. He would likely only think of Seong-heon sporadically. From now on, there would be no reason to mention Seong-heon’s name in front of Eun-soo.

Seong-heon was a being who deserved to be forgotten. Even if he were to drop dead, that fact must not reach Eun-soo.

The men stood on either side of the bed. Their shadows fell over Seong-heon’s face like grim reapers.

Do-kwon approached the bed slowly and cleared his throat. It was a signal for the visitor’s arrival to wake him up. However, Seong-heon’s closed eyes showed no sign of opening.

One of Do-kwon’s eyebrows shot up. Seeing him lying there so comfortably twisted his mood. The gaunt body, the sunken eye sockets, and the dark circles under his eyes didn’t even enter Do-kwon’s field of vision.

Do-kwon signaled the men with his eyes. Immediately, they slammed their large, rake-like hands down on Seong-heon’s shoulders. They looked as if they intended to bury him into the bed.

Under the immense pressure, Seong-heon snapped his eyes open. His pupils, wavering between the boundary of dream and reality, were incredibly cloudy.

“Wha—what!”

Discovering the men, Seong-heon flailed his limbs. But his shoulders were pinned down so hard that he could barely wiggle his legs.

“Who are you people! Let go of me!”

Seong-heon screamed like a squawking duck. Despite having been bedridden, his voice was loud. Do-kwon frowned deeply at the ringing shouts. He should have cut his Adam’s apple when they met at the gallery. He had been so blinded by the sight of him with Eun-soo that he hadn’t thought that far.

Do-kwon clicked his tongue in regret. Then, he thrust his face close to Seong-heon’s. As if to make sure he knew exactly who it was.

“You… Seo Do-kwon….”

Unfortunately, it seemed Seong-heon’s vision was still intact despite taking such a hit to the eye. Or perhaps, since only one eye had burst, there was no problem judging what he was seeing.

Meeting Seong-heon’s gaze, Do-kwon gave a pleasant, beaming smile. The corners of his mouth curled up widely.

“Hello, hyung.”

“You bastard… why are you here….”

Seong-heon’s eyes widened. His struggling became even more violent. In response, the men pinned down his thighs as well, fixing his body in place. Seong-heon’s pupils twitched anxiously.

Men binding his body. A smiling Do-kwon. And despite his screaming, not a single sound from outside. He had a bad feeling.

Seong-heon grit his teeth. Then, he suddenly opened his mouth wide, as if to scream. At that moment, Do-kwon plunged the needle into Seong-heon’s neck. He did it with such force that if it had been a knife instead of a needle, Seong-heon’s neck would have been severed instantly.

Do-kwon pressed the plunger and injected the drug. The transparent, cold liquid was sucked entirely into Seong-heon’s body.

“Kh….”

Seong-heon let out a suppressed groan. His wide eyes glared at Do-kwon as if to kill him. But it was only for a moment. His pupils dilated as wide as manhole covers, and his face instantly flushed a deep red. Veins rose like snakes on his neck, temples, and forehead.

Seong-heon clawed frantically at the bed with his fingernails. It felt as if his heart was drying up and shriveling like a walnut. His blood grew hot. No, “hot” wasn’t enough. It was like boiling water. He felt as if the veins carrying that blood were being cooked.

“Wha—what… what….”

Seong-heon looked at Do-kwon with eyes where the capillaries had all burst. Do-kwon, maintaining his smiling face, explained kindly and softly.

“It’s nothing much. You know drugs, right? It’s a drug. I made it by mixing adrenaline and a few other things. I prepared it specially for you, hyung. I hope you like it.”

“You crazy….”

Seong-heon ground his teeth. Then, suddenly, he snapped his neck back. His body stiffened as if having a seizure, his knees pulled inward, and he made a rattling sound in his throat.

Do-kwon climbed on top of Seong-heon’s stomach. Then, he gripped Seong-heon’s jaw violently. Seong-heon groaned under the powerful grip. It felt as if his jaw would shatter like a cracker.

“Look at me.”

“Ugh….”

“Who am I?”

Do-kwon asked in his characteristic low voice. Seong-heon’s eyes, devoid of focus and clouded beyond measure, looked at him. His pupils were so blurred that even though he was clearly looking at Do-kwon, it seemed as if he were staring into a void.

“Seo… Do, kwon….”

Seong-heon stammered. At this, Do-kwon shook his head with an expressionless face.

“No, I am an Alpha.”

“…….”

It was a nonsensical statement. He had asked him to guess who he was, but when he said the name, he suddenly claimed to be an Alpha. The conversation was flowing strangely, but Seong-heon himself couldn’t perceive the strangeness. His mind was hazy because of the drug Do-kwon had injected. His vision was filled with Do-kwon, and his ears echoed with that chillingly low voice.

Do-kwon stared intently at Seong-heon. Thus, Seong-heon could not avoid those eyes.

“I am an Alpha.”

“…….”

“And at the same time, I am the monster who came to kill you.”

Do-kwon became vividly imprinted in Seong-heon’s pupils. The world was blurry, but only Do-kwon was clear. As if hypnotizing him, Do-kwon repeated the same words with slight variations.

“I am an Alpha, and I am a monster.”

At those words, Seong-heon saw horns growing from the top of Do-kwon’s head. His eyeballs turned blood-red, and his pupils ripened into a yellowish hue. His face turned black, and his mouth slit open long, reaching his ears. A tongue emerged from between his teeth, wriggling like a tentacle, repeatedly coming up to Seong-heon’s eyes and retreating.

“Ugh… uuu….”

Seong-heon began to tremble violently. He was a real monster. He was a monster itself. Do-kwon’s hand gripping his jaw was so enormous. And his fingernails were so long and sharp. Everything was threatening.

Just as Seong-heon tried to shut his eyes tight, Do-kwon pulled his jaw up, forcing him to look at the men binding his limbs. The eyes of the men, backlit by the light, were also red eyeballs with golden pupils, just like Do-kwon’s.

“This one is an Alpha, and that one is an Alpha. Naturally, they are all monsters.”

“Ugh….”

“Every Alpha in the world is, in fact, a monster.”

Do-kwon whispered low and coldly. That voice was sucked into Seong-heon’s mind. His body shook as if convulsing. The bed itself rattled. But Do-kwon continued regardless. Very secretly, yet clearly, he gnawed away at Seong-heon’s psyche.

“I climbed up from hell to kill you. I am the leader of those monsters.”

“Uuu….”

“Alphas are everywhere. In the scorching midday sun, and in the damp darkness of midnight. There are more than a hundred, more than a thousand.”

Do-kwon’s voice continued without pause. He gave Seong-heon no room to think. It was truly like the whisper of a demon. Seong-heon’s blood-red face turned pale. He became as white as a corpse whose blood had been entirely drained.

Just then, Do-kwon gripped Seong-heon’s neck. His hideous hand clawed painfully at Seong-heon’s throat. Hook-like nails dug into the skin, and a hammer-like thumb pressed down as if to crush the Adam’s apple.

“Every Alpha is after your neck. Your neck, Seo Seong-heon.”

“Kugh… no…”

“It’s true. They grind their teeth, wanting to tear your neck apart. I’m grinding mine too.”

Do-kwon clicked his upper and lower teeth together. Every time that sound echoed, Seong-heon’s shoulders jerked. Tears streamed down from the corners of his eyes.

“An Alpha will eventually kill you.”

“…”

“You have to keep running. To a place where there are no Alphas.”

“Keu-heok…”

“But one day, you’ll be devoured. Alphas will tear your limbs apart. They’ll rip open your belly to pull out your intestines and gouge out your eyeballs.”

“Huuu… no… I don’t want to… no…”

For a long time after that, Do-kwon repeated over and over again about Alphas, monsters, and their desire to kill Seong-heon. Five minutes, ten minutes, twenty minutes. When a full hour had passed, Seong-heon, who had been shaking in convulsions, finally fainted.

Do-kwon stepped off of Seong-heon. The men who had been restraining him also let go. Do-kwon tidied his disheveled bangs.

Today, Do-kwon had come for revenge. Seong-heon’s social status and career were already shattered, and he had agonized over what else he could use to bring him down.

It had been a grueling deliberation. Finding the answer was difficult. Simply causing physical pain or cutting off a limb wasn’t enough.

To ensure that the misfortune of Seong-heon appearing before Eun-soo again never happened. To ensure he could not live a normal life. To make it impossible for him to function in society. He had to be broken completely and thoroughly.

Then, he thought of returning exactly what Seong-heon had done to Eun-soo.

However, Seong-heon wasn’t an Omega. What effect would a heat inducer have? He was a man who didn’t know shame to begin with. So, Do-kwon focused on fear.

Just as Eun-soo had feared cars and nameless Alphas, Do-kwon wanted to instill that same fear in Seong-heon. Alphas were everywhere. They were as numerous as cars in this world, and they weren’t specific.

The very existence of an Alpha had to become a source of terror.

Do-kwon’s goal was to make him live a life fearing that the Alpha living next door, the Alpha who happened to be in the same elevator, or the Alpha sitting at the next table in a restaurant might be a monster—that they might suddenly rip his mouth open or drag him down to hell.

Seong-heon would certainly fear Alphas. Since he had spent his entire life longing for and envying Alphas, he would recognize their presence instantly, like a breakout of hives. And in his terror, he would end up strangling himself.

Do-kwon desperately hoped that Seong-heon would hurt, very, very much.

Just as Eun-soo had been afraid.

Just as Eun-soo had cried.

Just as Eun-soo had suffered.

He had to suffer too.

…Because I did.