By Zephyria 
“What happened with Ban Seo-yi?”
I had no answer. I didn’t know the reason either.
“I don’t know. He suddenly ignored me unilaterally and said he wanted to cut ties.”
Do Yun-hyeok, showing some tact, offered a word of comfort.
“Well, he’s usually so self-willed. He’s like that normally. If you leave him be, he might come back around.”
“He’s like that normally?”
Do Yun-hyeok nodded.
“He has severe mood swings, so he’s all over the place. He’ll laugh one moment, get angry the next, go silent, or scream in his sleep.”
“Scream?”
“Yeah. The other day, he was crying and screaming that he didn’t want to do it again.”
“Didn’t want to do it again?”
Listening quietly, I unconsciously echoed his words. Do Yun-hyeok shrugged it off casually.
“The teachers at school really dislike Ban Seo-yi, and apparently, he even appeared in their dreams.”
“Ah…”
I nodded, a sense of unfamiliarity washing over me.
‘No wonder he developed such a hysterical personality.’
Thinking back, Ban Seo-yi’s mother in the novel also had a similar personality. Living in the same household, it would be hard to escape her influence. Especially if he experienced it at school too.
“Actually, I didn’t tell you in a text because I was worried you’d be concerned, but he seems to be overdoing it lately. He suddenly started showing interest in Yeonmyeong High School’s affairs… Never mind, forget what I just said. It’s not my place to talk about it.”
My lips pressed shut. Do Yun-hyeok awkwardly ran a hand through his hair. Not wanting to see him uncomfortable, I quickly shook my head.
“No, I get the gist of it. Thanks.”
Ban Seo-yi had spoken as if using his connection with the Yeonmyeong High School chairman was easy, but it seemed that wasn’t the case in reality. Do Yun-hyeok, who was also friends with Ban Seo-yi in the novel, seemed to know the situation.
Considering the unavoidable circumstances, my anger subsided. However, I wasn’t ready to let it go entirely.
The saving grace was that Do Yun-hyeok could act as an intermediary.
“So, if anything comes up about me later, please let me know. If you even will.”
“That’s difficult, but…”
The red-haired boy looked down at me and smiled playfully.
“I’m a little jealous.”
“What?”
“I feel a bit left out when you only talk about Ban Seo-yi.”
I stared at him, dumbfounded. His nickname, which I had almost forgotten recently, popped into my head. The mad dog was still the mad dog. Why did he even like me? As if my head wasn’t already spinning, it brought back Min Si-hu’s failed confession, which I had buried in the graveyard of my memories.
Suddenly, I felt suspicious. Come to think of it, what was our relationship that I was having this conversation with Do Yun-hyeok?
“So what do you want me to do? What do you want from me?”
I adjusted my hat properly and spoke with a hint of annoyance. My words didn’t come out kindly, fueled by my already foul mood.
I don’t know what everyone wants from me. I’ve never felt romantic feelings in my life. The more I thought about it, the less I understood. Do they want to hold hands, to touch?
‘Really?’
As I pondered seriously, Do Yun-hyeok gently lowered his gaze. His thick eyelashes cast deep shadows. His hand, fiddling with the cigarette tucked into his chest pocket, moved lightly.
“I want to be by your side.”
“……”
“That’s all. You’ll push me away if I ask for more, won’t you?”
“……”
His tone was playful, but the voice delivering the words was utterly serious. His clear answer left me momentarily speechless. His handsome face remained composed, as if he knew all my thoughts. He knew that the moment I crossed a line, I would refuse him outright.
I stood there in silence.
In a typical teen romance novel, everyone spouts strange lines. Perhaps I had never taken their words as genuine. The realization suddenly settled in my mind.
‘But anyone would have done this.’
A thought, almost an excuse, surged in my chest.
Even if I wanted to be serious, I couldn’t. Even if I tried to accept it as reality, everyone acted like they were fake. I just wanted to maintain balance, otherwise, I felt like I would trip over my own feet sometimes. I decided not to take this world too seriously. Except for those moments when someone got hurt right in front of me…
“…What if you don’t like that either?”
My question, laced with sarcasm, made me flinch. I hadn’t intended to be so biting. But Do Yun-hyeok was calm, as if he had anticipated my words.
“Then I’ll have to make you like me.”
It was an unusual, yet undeniably Do Yun-hyeok-like answer. The problem was with me. If my previous tone was a slip of the tongue, now a genuinely spiteful feeling arose.
Who likes whom? A feeling of absolute refusal to lose.
“What if I don’t?”
“That’s impossible.”
“I think it’s possible.”
“Then…”
Do Yun-hyeok drew out his words and pulled a long, white cigarette from his chest pocket. The cigarette holder between his long, slender fingers spun like a magic trick.
“Should I cry?”
“Huh?”
I doubted my ears at the unexpectedly uncool answer. My mind, which had been anticipating a predictable response, felt numb.
“But I don’t think crying will help.”
What is this…
He scrunched up his face in a grimace and clutched his thick chest with his other hand.
“I imagined it for nothing. My heart feels like it’s tearing apart.”
Thwack. With a groan, Do Yun-hyeok ran his hand through his hair, and the slender cigarette in his hand snapped in half with surprising ease.
“This won’t do. I’ll have to risk my life to woo you.”
“……”
Startled, I stole a glance at him as if trying to escape.
‘Why is he saying something like that so casually?’
Is it because he’s an antagonist in a teen romance novel? I felt foolish for starting to take him seriously again.
“Why would you risk your life for something like this?”
I touched my temple and sighed, averting my gaze. Do Yun-hyeok turned to me as if he’d heard something absurd.
“Of course, I have to.”
“Why risk the only one you have?”
“Because it’s the only one I have, I have to risk it on you.”
Are we even having a conversation?
Repeating the same illogical points, I realized I was attempting to converse with a lunatic. Why do I always try to talk to him? Am I incapable of learning from this?
“……”
“……”
We looked at each other with expressions of incomprehension, and I broke eye contact first. I felt like I would definitely lose any staring contest. As if to justify that I wasn’t losing, I mumbled.
“I like people who are quiet and responsible.”
“That’s me exactly?”
“…You fail at ‘quiet’.”
Do Yun-hyeok shamelessly pointed to himself. I glanced dismissively at his handsome face. It was absurd.
“Looking at you, I’d say you’re quiet enough.”
A moment of silence enveloped us. Just as I was about to say I was going home, Do Yun-hyeok looked at me as if he could read my mind. His piercing gaze was palpable even through the brim of my hat. While I momentarily forgot how to speak, Do Yun-hyeok murmured softly.
“When I see you, I can finally breathe easily.”
“……”
“And it feels like I’m about to remember something I’d forgotten. What could it be…”
A faint breeze blew along the wall. Suddenly, it felt so cheesy my tongue felt dry. I adjusted my hat and held my breath.
His thick eyelashes blinked slowly, as if trying to avoid the wind.
And then he uttered a word I could never have imagined.
“Destiny?”
“Oof!”
Is he crazy? I was about to ask him back, but I accidentally bit my tongue. I bit down so hard that my fingers, which had been curling up in embarrassment, straightened out.
Tears welled up. The metallic taste of blood spread in my mouth.
“Destiny…”
Meanwhile, Do Yun-hyeok continued to mutter his own thoughts.
‘Doesn’t he even ask if I’m okay?’
Feeling a pang of resentment, I wrinkled my nose and glared.
But something felt strange. Do Yun-hyeok seemed entranced, as if under a spell, lost in his own words.
“Destiny…?”
It was obvious. I had told myself I wouldn’t fall for this kind of trick! I waved my hand in front of him, meaning ‘Stop it and snap out of it.’ Do Yun-hyeok’s eyes, which had been blankly staring into space, blinked rapidly.
“Huh? What? Did I just say destiny? Then it must be.”
Do Yun-hyeok was just spouting nonsense. The nickname ‘mad dog’ was well-earned.
I felt like I really needed to go home. The sky, long past dismissal time, was starting to dip towards evening.
I shook my head and put my hands in my pockets. Suddenly, I felt hard, round objects. It was the mobile phone charm Do Yun-hyeok had given me as a gift last time.
The beads, strung in a circle, fit easily over my index finger. I stroked the bead caught on my knuckle with my thumb.
“……”
I stopped myself before saying something more to Do Yun-hyeok. Honestly, I didn’t even know what I wanted to say. I felt awkward myself.
I firmly refused Do Yun-hyeok’s offer to walk me home and headed home alone.
❖ ❖ ❖
Amidst the chaos, final exams were approaching. I also received a call from the reporter I had interviewed. They were conducting further investigations regarding school violence and said the report would be delayed. I decided to look on the bright side. Dropping a bomb on the school before exams would only add to the confusion.
As I diligently prepared for the exams, a strange atmosphere began to permeate the school.
It started with rumors that the gym teacher had given an interview to a broadcasting station. At first, it was just curiosity – ‘Why would the gym teacher be interviewed?’ – but as rumors of the counseling teacher also being interviewed surfaced, the mood began to shift subtly.
The final blow came with another rumor: someone had voluntarily reported the Iljinhoe to the police.
I didn’t know when or where the rumors started, but they were already being accepted as fact among the students.
‘Who would dare?’
Even though they were whispering, it was clear everyone was thinking it. The cafeteria, where all grades gathered at the same time every day, was a place where one could gauge the atmosphere among students.