By Zephyria 
Yeon-jun’s eyes flickered with hesitation before he leaned his head against Eun-ha’s lap.
“Hyung probably doesn’t know this, but…”
“Mm.”
“I…”
Trailing off, Yeon-jun wrapped his arms around his own calves, hugging them like a doll.
“I’ve never really been the jealous type.”
Eun-ha listened without saying much. He set the hairdryer down on the sofa and fixed his gaze on the crown of the black head.
“So… I always thought that kind of thing was childish, and something that just annoys the other person.”
As Yeon-jun calmly explained that he had been in a position where he couldn’t understand such feelings, and that he didn’t think it was a particularly healthy emotion in a relationship, Eun-ha looked down at him with a subtle expression. For some reason, it sounded like he was speaking from experience.
It probably was. He was mentioning his past dating history. Had his ex been the jealous type?
It was while Eun-ha was pondering this simple deduction. Yeon-jun suddenly let out a faint sigh and buried his face almost entirely into Eun-ha’s lap. He mumbled in a greatly reduced volume.
“And yet… because I’m like this now.”
“…”
“I kind of hate myself right now.”
“…”
As the words suggested, his voice was laced with self-loathing. A voice that sounded sad and upset. In short, he had never experienced jealousy in his life, tended not to understand the emotion, and had always regarded it as something far removed from the kind of relationship he pursued—but now that he had harbored that childish emotion, he found it quite regrettable.
Eun-ha, who had been looking down, reached out. As he placed his palm against Yeon-jun’s forehead as if enveloping him, Yeon-jun, who had been hiding his face in the lap, slowly lifted his head. Eun-ha lowered his hand a bit more and cupped Yeon-jun’s cheek. He pulled him slightly closer and spoke.
“Are you jealous?”
At the clear question, Yeon-jun met his gaze. Biting the inside of his lip as if to stall for time, he gave a slight, hazy-eyed nod. Eun-ha toyed with the cheek that felt warm, as if flushed with fever, and spoke nonchalantly.
“Of what?”
“…That you’re so close with that hyung.”
At the voice that had become as hazy as smoke, the corners of Eun-ha’s mouth curved upward. It was Yeon-jun who broke the silence that had fallen while Eun-ha maintained his calm expression.
“It’s strange, isn’t it?”
His voice sounded almost gloomy. Eun-ha finally couldn’t hold back a laugh and let out a small snicker. Feeling the gaze glancing up at him, he thought to himself: Yeah, it is.
“It is pretty strange.”
“…Ha. Right. I thought so too—”
“Why do you like me so much?”
A faint light flickered in the eyes looking down at him. Like someone fascinated by something strange and novel.
Yeon-jun occasionally witnessed this side of Eun-ha. Mostly, like now, it was a side he could glimpse whenever Eun-ha was curious about their relationship or Yeon-jun’s state of mind.
And every time, he would ask a similar question. Why do you like me so much? Why me of all people… He didn’t know why Eun-ha harbored the same doubt over and over, even after he answered.
There’s no particular reason. I just like you because you’re Hyung… As he prepared to answer as usual, his gaze was captured by those lively eyes, and he answered unconsciously.
“I wonder.”
“…”
“I don’t really know either.”
“If you don’t know, who would?”
A small laugh leaked out at the accusatory tone. Yeon-jun’s shoulders shrugged as he replied.
“I’m serious. That’s why it’s frustrating sometimes…”
“…”
“Why I like you this much.”
What’s with the frustration now? Eun-ha wrinkled his nose. After that, a series of whining voices continued in a relaxed atmosphere. Hyung has so many friends… and there are so many people who like Hyung…
The first part is true, but what’s the second part? This is the first I’ve heard of it.
Don’t pretend you don’t know.
After a brief moment of playful bickering, Eun-ha made it very clear: there was absolutely no need to worry about or care about his relationship with Gu Hae-bin. He wasn’t sure if the message had been fully received, though.
* * *
And after that, Yeon-jun’s period of suffering continued in small doses. This was thanks to Gu Hae-bin starting to pop up unexpectedly again, just as before. He was a guy with far too much time on his hands, and if he set his mind to it, he was the type who could easily camp out at Eun-ha’s house. Fortunately, he had enough tact that such a disaster didn’t actually happen.
Whenever Eun-ha was spending time at work at the cafe, Gu Hae-bin would appear before him casually, like someone out for a stroll. Since a college freshman—who was in the most leisurely period of his life, winter break—was stuck to Eun-ha’s side like a pair, a three-way meeting naturally took place.
Every time, Eun-ha observed Yeon-jun out of the corner of his eye, consciously checking for a reaction, but no significant change was visible. He mingled and conversed with Gu Hae-bin without any issues. Quite favorably, and innocently. Generally, it followed a pattern where Gu Hae-bin, who was very interested in their love life, would toss out a question first, and various conversations would follow. He didn’t know why this seemingly peaceful scene bothered him more.
Perhaps it was because he felt it intuitively. Regardless of Yeon-jun being friendly toward Gu Hae-bin, he was constantly conscious of and uncomfortable with the relationship between Eun-ha and Hae-bin.
If Yeon-jun had just revealed those inner thoughts openly, it wouldn’t have weighed on Eun-ha’s mind this much. The reason Yeon-jun tried not to show it was likely because he believed the cause lay with himself.
In other words, he thought he was the strange one for being jealous…
After a few days passed, Eun-ha finally contacted Gu Hae-bin separately.
Let’s not see each other for a while
To the blunt point he had made, a very short and clear reply returned shortly.
?
The feeling of absurdity was conveyed perfectly.
How should he explain it? After agonizing over it, Eun-ha endured a bit of embarrassment and decided to tell the truth.
I think Yeon-jun keeps worrying about the relationship between you and me. He’s jealous
Like… his expression isn’t great
The reply came back after about five minutes. Because the phone vibrated violently all at once, Eun-ha hurried to check the screen, only to immediately let out a cynical laugh.
lol fuck
Tell him to stop imagining shit
It makes me want to puke
I’m literally gagging right now
Eun-ha tapped the keyboard quickly.
Sorry, but I’m the one who feels like puking first, which is why I told you let’s not see each other for a while
a while (typo) → a while
Did you actually puke because of that?
Not yet
I just puked. I’m holding onto the toilet right now. I win. I’m more fucking disgusted
The finger about to tap the keypad hovered in the air. Ah. He might be a little annoyed. Eun-ha ran his tongue over his lower lip. He felt irritated, but he couldn’t find a clever way to pass that irritation back to Gu Hae-bin. The fact that it felt like a defeat made him even more annoyed. He should have said he’d vomited up all his stomach acid. It was already too late.
That evening, Eun-ha showed the messages to Yeon-jun. It was to prove that they were the kind of relationship that loathed each other and attacked one another without hesitation.
Let’s not see each other for a while?
I think Yeon-jun keeps worrying about the relationship between you and me. He’s jealous
Like… his expression isn’t great
lol fuck
Tell him to stop imagining shit
It makes me want to puke
I’m literally gagging right now
Sorry, but I’m the one who feels like puking first, which is why I told you let’s not see each other for a while
a while (typo) → a while
Did you actually puke because of that?
Not yet
I just puked. I’m holding onto the toilet right now. I win. I’m more fucking disgusted