“Michael. Come here. Your clothes are all dirty.”
Father Joseph brushed the dirt off Ire’s clothes with his hands. Then, he rubbed Ire’s cheeks, chapped red from the cold, and smiled. “Look at your face. Like a ripe apple.” Ire had only heard of apples; he had never eaten one.
Ire liked the feel of his large hand on his cheek. Perhaps it was because he had grown up without knowing a father figure. Father Joseph was also the one who gave him the baptismal name Michael, along with the name Ire. Sister Agape had told him that he was named Ire because he came to the church seven days after it opened.
“Sister! Look at this!”
Ire called for Sister Agape, making a fuss. Christmas was approaching, so they were decorating a tree. The decorations were just painted tin cans or paper cutouts, but he was still happy and joyful.
“Pretty. Shall we put it here too?”
Sister Agape hung a paper star high up, out of Ire’s reach. Ire, who had been excitedly opening his mouth, looked around. Matteo had been missing since morning. He always followed him around like glue, so he couldn’t contain his curiosity and tugged at Sister Agape’s sleeve. He was about to ask where Matteo had gone when the door burst open, and bright light flooded into the church.
“Father Joseph! Sister Agape! Get away! Strangers, cough!”
The man was a volunteer who lived nearby and helped with church affairs. As he collapsed, spitting blood, Father Joseph rushed towards him. Ire, terrified, hid behind Sister Agape, but the door was violently thrown open, and men with guns stormed in.
Sister Agape grabbed Ire’s hand and quickly headed inside the church. She pushed Ire under the desk in the prayer room, held his hand tightly, and looked intently into his eyes.
“Michael. Don’t come out of here, no matter what. Understand?”
Ire, terrified, clutched at Sister Agape’s sleeve. The Sister smiled as usual and stroked Ire’s hair. “I’ll be right back. Count to a hundred.” The door closed, and Ire, left alone, buried his face between his legs in fear.
One, two, three, four….
What was next? What was it…?
But even after waiting a long time, Sister Agape didn’t appear, and neither did anyone else. Was it over? Could he go out now? After much deliberation, he peeked out from under the desk and crawled out. He carefully opened the door and walked down the hallway, muffling his footsteps.
He heard a soft laugh and felt relieved. It wasn’t a big deal after all. But why hadn’t Sister come to get him? As he thought this, a fishy smell wafted into his nose as he got closer to the chapel.
Ire stopped at the end of the hallway.
“Sister…? Father…?” He called out in a faint voice, but there was no answer.
As Ire turned around the pillar and entered the sanctuary, his legs gave way, and he collapsed. Father Joseph was lying on the floor, covered in blood and in a terrible state. His body trembled, and tears welled up.
“Father…?”
As he regained his senses and crawled towards him, he heard a panting sound from somewhere. He noticed someone under an old chair in the sanctuary. He didn’t recognize her at first because the veil she always wore was off. Then, he realized it was Sister Agape, and his breath caught in his throat.
Sister Agape was staring at Ire with her eyes open. Red blood flowed from the corners of her mouth, which always wore a smile, and her body was heaving up and down. Below her, a man with his pants down was panting in a strange position.
Ah, ah….
Pain struck him as if his throat was being strangled, and an unknown sound escaped his mouth. He barely managed to get up and go to Sister Agape, but the man, belatedly noticing Ire’s presence, jumped up and pulled up his pants.
“Shit, what is this! There was a kid?”
“Where did he come from? Hey, who are you!”
“Is this bitch your mom?”
The man, chuckling, put a cigarette in his mouth and kicked Agape’s body, tap, tap. Each time, Ire’s body flinched. Sister Agape’s skin, lying there, had turned as white as wax. The men holding bottles and guns had crazy looks in their eyes. Among them, a man with an eyepatch swaggered closer.
“He’s pretty. Is it a girl?”
Ire was frozen, tears streaming down his face. It felt like a hot fireball was rising from his stomach, but he didn’t know exactly what it was.
“Hng… euh… sob….”
“Hey kid. Come here. I’m not a scary man.”
“Heh heh, as if I’d believe that. You crazy bastard.”
“Let’s grab him first. We’ll get some money if we sell him to the old men?”
As the man grabbed his wrist, Ire collapsed and covered his head. A pain like being split with nails arose, and an unbearable agony surged. A scream or sob, he didn’t know which, burst out, and the men shouted.
“What the hell! Shut him up!”
“Shut up before I shoot you!”
“Damn it, just shoot him!”
The moment the man’s hand touched him, Ire slammed his forehead against the floor. This is a dream. This isn’t real. It’s impossible that Sister and Father are dead. God always protects the good people, doesn’t he?
But why! Why! Why on earth!
Beeep- Tinnitus worsened, and he started to run out of breath. The boiling rage swallowed his small body, and words of curse began to pour out of his mouth. Die! Die! All of you die! He felt vibrations below his knees, and the sound of something shattering and screams were mixed together, turning it into chaos.
That was the last memory.
“…Michael….”
Opening his eyes to a familiar voice, Matteo’s face appeared first. As soon as Ire saw him, he burst into tears of sorrow. “Brother… I had a scary dream…. Sister… Father….” Matteo hugged the sobbing Ire. “Let’s go… we have to get out of here….”
He covered Ire’s face with his clothes.
“Where’s Father? Where’s Sister…?”
“…….”
“Matteo….”
Ire pulled on his clothes with his small hands. What he saw before him was, surprisingly, the burning church. Surprised, he tried to get out of his arms, but Matteo hugged him tightly again.
“Scary people came… those people… those people… sob!”
Even as he muttered blankly, Matteo didn’t react.
“Where did Father and Sister go…?”
“Later, you can see them later.”
“When…?”
“When Ire becomes a grandpa.”
No matter how hard he tried to hold back, the tears wouldn’t stop flowing. Matteo put Ire on an old Quad Bike. Only then did he realize that the back of his hand, which was tucking in his clothes tightly, was red. As he burst into tears again, Matteo kept wiping away his tears.
“Don’t cry. Father and Sister wouldn’t want you to cry.”
Foolishly. He had a look on his face like he was about to cry himself.
Kim Ha-yoon, with his hands in his pants pockets, quietly looked down at Ire, who was lying on the bed. A small light was on in the darkened room. Ire had gone in earlier, saying he was going to sleep before the movie ended, and about an hour later, he heard groaning from somewhere.
“…tteo….”
He frowned and made a painful expression, so Ha-yoon sat on the edge of his bed. He touched the hair that had fallen down with his hand. Quiet. His chest rose and fell rhythmically as he slept soundly. This time, he slowly moved down.
He had felt it before, but Ire’s body temperature was low. When he touched his cheek, Ire woke up as if he had been awakened by the touch. Then, he found Kim Ha-yoon in the dark and sat up abruptly. He coldly pushed away the hand that touched his face.
“Why are you here?”
“This is my house.”
Ire looked around and rubbed his face. Ah, he had a dream. He had been crying at Matteo’s affectionate touch, but he was quite embarrassed to see Kim Ha-yoon in front of him. He was worried that he might have made a slip of the tongue in his sleep, so he cautiously looked at Kim Ha-yoon.
An awkward atmosphere flowed, and he wanted him to leave quickly, but Kim Ha-yoon flopped down on the empty seat next to him.
“I’m being generous. I’ll sleep next to you.”
“Why…?”
“If you have a nightmare, I have to comfort you.”
“Who? Me?”
He looked at him with an absurd expression, but Kim Ha-yoon patted the bed with his hand. Lie down. Then he closed his eyes. Ire grabbed his pillow. Without hesitation, he was about to go out to the living room when his arm was grabbed, and his body fell backward. As he tried to get up again, Kim Ha-yoon wrapped his arms around his chest and clung to him.
“I had a shitty dream too. It would be nice if we could rely on each other.”
“Let go. It’s uncomfortable.”
“Bear with it. We have a lot to do tomorrow morning. We have to sleep like this to stay in good condition.”
The more he tried to escape, the more Kim Ha-yoon tightened his grip like a noose.
“I get it, so sleep apart. It’s stuffy.”
“I used to have a dog.”
Suddenly, why is he talking about a dog….
“His eyes looked like yours. He was a husky, and he was handsome. He was also very loyal.”
“…….”
“I used to hug him every night when I slept. Then I wasn’t afraid of anything.”
“I’m not a dog.”
“I know. You’re a person. The same person as me.”
He seemed to have put strength into the word “same.” He thought it was just his imagination. Ire was about to say one more word but stopped. Every time he wiggled his body, he clung even closer and rubbed his cheek against his shoulder. Looking to the side, Kim Ha-yoon had his eyes tightly closed.
A cool scent tickled his nose. In a resigned mood, he sighed and stared blankly at the ceiling. What are two guys doing? He was thinking that.
“What happened to that dog?”
He was suddenly curious and asked, and Kim Ha-yoon answered willingly.
“He died.”
“Why….”
“He bit someone and seriously injured them.”
“…….”
“I couldn’t keep a dog that had tasted blood once, so I shot him.”
“Who? Captain’s father?”
“No. Me.”
Ire looked at Kim Ha-yoon at the emotionless voice. His face with his eyes closed felt very peaceful. What was it like when you killed the dog? Were you sad? But he couldn’t ask. Instead, he imagined it in his head. If the day comes when I betray him, wouldn’t he kill me like he killed the dog? He had such an imagination.