#40

It happened one day. Amber tilted his head at a missed call from an unknown number on his phone. If it had been the call from Tennessee he was waiting for, the caller’s number wouldn’t have appeared.

Above all, the caller’s number was long and started with 44. As far as Amber knew, all US area codes were three digits. After a brief moment of thought, Amber scratched his head and called back. Surprisingly, the call was answered immediately.

“Hello.”

[Hello.]

From that first greeting, Amber realized that 44 was the country code for the UK. Even without explaining that it was the London branch of the security firm, the accent made it obvious. Though flustered, Amber explained that there had been a missed call. There was a brief bustle behind the phone.

[Are you Mr. Dexley? Mr. Ryker Amber Dexley?]

“Yes, that’s correct.”

The security firm. Is it Tennessee? Amber’s heart began to beat rapidly.

[Are you a family member of Mr. Isaiah Clayton?]

“I’m not that kind of…”

Ah… no way.

[Are you not?]

The heart that had been racing with anticipation was now pounding anxiously as if it might jump out of his chest.

Please, Tennessee.

Amber pleaded out of habit. Please, I hope you didn’t leave me and go completely.

“I am… Did something happen?”

[He is currently hospitalized. Mr. Clayton left your name and phone number as an emergency contact.]

“Where… where is he? I’ll go, I’ll go right now. Right now…”

Amber searched for his car keys with trembling hands. Damn it, he was sure he had left them on the kitchen counter, but no matter how much he searched, they weren’t there. Only after ransacking the sofa and dining table did Amber find the car keys sitting quietly next to a vase. He told himself to stay calm, but it wasn’t easy. He felt tension and anxiety, but at the same time, a great sense of relief washed over him. At any rate, Tennessee was alive.

[I’ll give you the hospital’s contact information.]

Amber wrote down the number being dictated with trembling hands. He pressed so hard that the paper crumpled along the path of the pen.

“Is it critical? Is it something serious?”

Feeling that he wouldn’t be able to drive properly, Amber took a taxi. The voice over the phone was annoyingly calm.

[For security reasons, it’s difficult to provide details, but it was an accident that occurred while protecting a client.]

Amber was sick and tired of Tennessee’s despicable steadfastness.

He had once asked why Tennessee decided to go into security.

‘Is it because of things from the past? Or do you want to do something else now?’

Looking down at Amber through a veil of white smoke, Tennessee had a peculiar look in his eyes.

‘Are you asking if I’m repenting?’

When Amber nodded, Tennessee smiled faintly. There was a thick scent of cigarettes. Conscious of Amber’s dislike for smoking, Tennessee often kept the window open. Tennessee’s thick hair swayed in the wind. Bathed in sunlight, Tennessee looked languid.

‘Repentance isn’t done in that way. Expecting to be forgiven and become a new person just by doing good deeds is a cowardly thing.’

In the hazy drifting cigarette smoke, Tennessee’s eyelashes cast a shadow. Tennessee looked a bit tired. He seemed to be drifting into a languid sleep, just as he did whenever Amber was by his side.

‘Rather than regret, I just do it because it’s an easy job.’

Amber knew that there were times when Tennessee spoke with a clumsy honesty, rather than a blatant lie or a bold truth. Like a stray dog burying its nose in the trash abandoned on the street, Amber sometimes dug through the words Tennessee had discarded to glimpse the inner flesh.

Tennessee’s answer was short, but it was enough for Amber.

‘Are you sleepy? Shall we go.’

Amber had stood up, and Tennessee had nodded and risen as well. It was in that house in Chicago.

Tennessee had said he was a soldier. So, he must have spent several years in the military, likely doing dangerous work for a long time. He had also worked with the FBI for a few years. Since everywhere he went was a war zone, his work there probably wasn’t safe either. He had remained unscathed throughout all those long years, so how could an accident happen so soon after he started working as a bodyguard?

While the nurses guided him, Amber had to wipe away cold sweat.

His heart was racing. Despite spending his entire life doing dangerous work, Tennessee had never once shown signs of struggling. Though his body was covered in scars from various wounds, he never complained or acted as if he were doing someone a favor. Perhaps that was why Amber had thought Tennessee would always remain this serene. Like a superhero in a comic book, he believed Tennessee would never be hurt, and that he would overcome any hardship or adversity.

But Tennessee was also human. He was a mere mortal.

Amber had thought there would be no way for him to know if Tennessee died right this second, but a part of his heart must have held an unconscious arrogance, believing that Tennessee could never let that happen. Amber bit his lip.

Then, seeing Tennessee lying in the bed, Amber turned his head away as if to avoid him. Even though he hadn’t done anything, he was suddenly out of breath. He had to struggle not to shake.

There wasn’t a single spot on his body that was intact.

With a pale, ghostly complexion, Amber listened to the doctor explain Tennessee’s condition. Contrary to his disastrous appearance, Tennessee’s injuries were not life-threatening.

“It’s too early to be relieved, so we’ll have to monitor his progress… but I’d like to say it was a stroke of sheer luck.”

At the doctor’s words, Amber could guess the scale of the accident. However, he thought that if Tennessee were truly a lucky person, he wouldn’t have been hurt like that.

He probably never lived a life of peace and comfort, yet he was hurt again. Wondering if this wasn’t unfair, Amber gave a self-deprecating laugh.

It was only after two full days that Tennessee opened his eyes. Amber was in the middle of sending text messages to inform his family. Feeling something strange, he looked up and discovered Tennessee staring intently at him.

“Tennessee.”

There were certainly many things he wanted to reproach him for, but upon seeing Tennessee’s blue eyes, a surge of emotion took over.

“Does your head hurt?”

There was no reaction from Tennessee.

Amber sensed something was wrong. Tennessee’s eyes were transparent and empty, like glass beads. It was a gaze like that of an inanimate object. It was also like the eyes of a reptile staring at its prey. It felt as if he were being sucked in, but at the same time, a sense of crisis washed over him.

“Tennessee?”

Amber slowly raised both hands. He was no longer small and young, and since he was nearly 6 feet 4 inches tall, he didn’t know if such a gesture would work, but Amber hoped to look as non-threatening as possible. Approaching slowly as if dealing with a wild beast, he slowly lowered himself into the chair beside the bed. Throughout this series of actions, Tennessee remained unresponsive, his gaze fixed on Amber.

“Who are you?”

“Amber. I’m Amber.”

Normally, he would have felt hurt, but Amber wasn’t wounded. It was because he had sensed something strange about Tennessee.

“You’re Amber?”

Amber curled the corners of his mouth up, but Tennessee’s expression was different from the one he usually knew.

“Prove it.”

Was it because it had been so long since they met? Amber tossed out a light joke.

“Well, we agreed that if we reunited once I became an adult, you’d date me.”

Even though there was no change in expression, Amber detected a slight confusion in Tennessee.

In reality, Tennessee was feeling deeply confused.

The man in front of him was exactly the adult Amber Tennessee had expected. A playful yet sly appearance. A serious atmosphere unusual for his young age. However, the voice and physique were different, and above all, the face…

Tennessee did not recognize that face. That was impossible. Tennessee had been certain that he would recognize Amber in any situation.

“You’re Amber?”

Without realizing it, Amber looked at his own reflection in the window. David would occasionally look at Amber—especially on the day he wore a tuxedo to the prom—and tear up, saying, “I can’t believe that little Ryker grew this much,” but Amber didn’t think he had changed so much as to be unrecognizable.

Indeed, while his frame had changed significantly, there were no major differences in his physical characteristics, and anyone could link the childhood Amber to the current Amber.

The reason Tennessee didn’t recognize Amber was not, in the end, because Amber had changed much.

The playful smile Amber had forced on his face crumbled.

“I’ll go call the doctor for a moment.”

“It seems to be prosopagnosia.”

That is what the doctor said. It was only after taking another MRI that he heard those words.

“It can happen due to head trauma. He didn’t have it before, right?”

As Amber nodded anxiously, the doctor continued.

“In cases where prosopagnosia is acquired, there aren’t many reported cases of recovery. It could also be psychogenic. It’s difficult to make a definitive diagnosis yet, so let’s wait and see.”

As he listened silently, there was no sign of resignation in Amber’s eyes. In his view, Tennessee was a person who could not be explained by existing logic or methods. Therefore, Amber steadied his heart, believing that Tennessee simply couldn’t recognize him for a short while.

When Amber returned to the hospital room, Tennessee was awake. He had that gaze, observing like a predator.

“I really am Amber.”

Realizing that Tennessee was still not convinced, Amber hesitated before unbuttoning his shirt.