RYC 16

“Just for that?”

Doug looked up at me, appearing bewildered, and I spoke indifferently.

“You didn’t change your phone password.”

At those words, Doug’s jaw dropped. Then, as if snapping back to his senses, he spat out harshly.

“You went through my phone? Looking through someone else’s phone without permission—isn’t that the definition of tactless behavior?”

Doug lunged at me with words, but I remained unimpressed. Those who have committed a sin always try to shift the responsibility onto the other party. Seeing a prosecutor act exactly like the criminals he’s dealt with makes me realize that a person’s inner nature has nothing to do with their outer shell. Lost in this rather philosophical thought, I asked nonchalantly.

“Oh, then maybe I should have just called and told them that Douglas Bacon came to a hotel to sleep with me, had a round, and is currently showering?”

Doug shut his mouth, unable to say another word. I watched him with my arms crossed. After distorting his face in frustration, Doug eventually let out a sigh of resignation.

“……I’ve decided to get engaged.”

“Since when?”

“In about two months…… I met her parents at the last mayor’s party and we discussed a few things.”

Only then did I understand why Doug had subtly avoided the topic of the party.

“How long have you been seeing her?”

“……About six months.”

“Ha!”

A harsh sound escaped me. I ran a hand through my hair irritably. I quickly counted in my head how many times I’d slept with him during those six months. Including today, it felt like at least ten times. Anger began to surge within me.

“You’ve been seeing someone and you didn’t tell me until now? Then you shouldn’t have had sex with me.”

If he had apologized and said he was sorry, I intended to let it slide. I would have conceded if he said today was meant to be the last time, or that he planned to confess while breaking up.

But Doug said something absurd.

“What does it matter? That woman is that woman, and you are you.”

“……What?”

I thought I had misheard. When I reflexively asked again, Doug spoke nonchalantly.

“I like having sex with you. Don’t worry, we can keep meeting like this even after I’m married. I’ll make up some excuse on the weekends……”

“So,”

I cut him off. My voice trembled slightly.

“You’re saying you’ll marry her in front of everyone and sleep with me behind her back? Lying to your wife?”

“Why not? I told you, you’re the best. You need a sex partner anyway, so isn’t this a win-win? It’s no different from what we’ve been doing; you and I can just keep meeting occasionally and enjoy each other. Besides, you know that I basically can’t do it with women. I managed to do it somehow, but I only barely got it up and put it in by thinking of you.”

Hearing such words didn’t make me happy at all. What kind of nonsense was this bastard spouting? Did he think I’d be moved by such talk?

Continuing to ramble, Doug approached me and tried to embrace me. A part of the towel wrapped around his waist was standing stiffly. I stood my ground and waited until Doug got close. When he leaned toward me with a flushed face, I ruthlessly drove my knee up into his aroused groin.

“……Guh.”

In indescribable pain, Doug collapsed, unable to even scream, letting out only a strange groan. I looked down at him and gritted my teeth.

“You’re a son of a bitch.”

Leaving him there, gasping and clutching his crotch, I snatched up my discarded shirt. Just as I was about to leave, Doug shouted from behind in a cracked voice.

“Damn it……! You rolled around with other guys besides me too!”

“Shut the fuck up, you piece of shit!”

I screamed as I opened the door.

“That happened after I broke up with you! I was faithful to you while we were dating!”

Slam! I closed the door with all my strength. At the loud noise, guests staying in other rooms poked their heads out one by one and looked around. I walked as quickly as possible, hurriedly putting on my shirt.

My backside hurt and I was in a foul mood, so I took a taxi home, only to find something had arrived in the meantime. When I opened it, it was paperwork regarding the aftermath of an accident.

“……Ha!”

As I quickly scanned the numbers, a choked sound escaped my throat.

The insurance limit was insufficient.

* * *

Fuck, damn it, shit!

I cursed loudly while scrubbing the bathroom tiles frantically. Everything was infuriating. To pay the remaining balance, I’d have to go to the bank as soon as the weekend ended to look into a loan.

I haven’t even finished paying off my student loans yet.

“Ah!”

In an instant, my hand slipped and I sprained my wrist. Fortunately, it wasn’t a major injury, but I felt a searing pain.

“……Haaa.”

Letting out a boiling sigh, I sat leaning against the wall. As I stopped moving, everything became silent. For a while, I stared blankly into the air. I had been so angry, yet now the only thing on my mind was where and how much of a loan I could get. Despite having been so furiously enraged at Doug just a few hours ago.

How could I feel absolutely nothing now? Even if the romantic feelings had ended years ago, all that remained was the unpleasant lingering feeling of having unintentionally committed adultery.

Would I have acted differently if this had happened while we were dating?

The answer came the moment the question arose. Of course, I would have acted exactly as I did now. It was obvious that the emotions I felt wouldn’t be any different.

That’s why we broke up. Because the feelings were only that shallow.

The fact that the only emotion I felt for him now was a thin layer of anger seemed to prove that I had never loved that bastard so desperately, neither in the past nor now.

If I had truly loved that bastard, what would have happened by now?

I probably would have gone crazy, just as he did.

I closed my eyes and covered my face with both hands.

What a relief. The fact that my heart beats fiercely for no one but myself.

They say wolves love only one partner for their entire lives.

In a book I read as a child, there was a story of a wolf who wandered the forest searching for his mate who had been captured by humans, only to eventually be caught in a trap. The humans tried to tame him, but he did not lose his pride and simply gazed at the wilderness where he was born and raised until he breathed his last. And the female he so desperately sought had crossed the wilderness of the afterlife before him.

But because I am human, I do not know such sanctity.

“I’m sorry.”

A bank employee named Robin rejected my request in a cheerful voice, chirping just like his name. I smiled back and shook his hand.

“I understand, thank you.”

“Yes, have a nice day, Mr. Chrissy Jin.”

After a light handshake, I turned away. I maintained a smiling face until I stepped out of the bank.