#144

Shin Ho-jae probably already knew. Unlike him, Ho-jae would have been in constant contact with his family and friends in Korea.

As expected, Shin Ho-jae wasn’t surprised, nor did he ask what it was. He simply took his time tidying up everything he had eaten. Then, he asked something unexpected.

“How did it feel?”

“What do you mean?”

“How did you feel after seeing that article?”

For a moment, Jung-hyun was speechless and couldn’t answer.

How did he feel? Well… he thought that it didn’t feel real, and that while he might be responsible for the death, he felt no sense of responsibility or guilt. And then, foolishly, he worried about his mother who was still in Korea.

None of these were things he felt comfortable sharing candidly with Shin Ho-jae. He didn’t feel the need to distinguish whether it was because he wasn’t the type of person to openly reveal his inner thoughts, or because it was the shame of a blood-related family, regardless of how completely he had severed ties.

“When I was young, there was an uncle who was very close with my family. We used to hang out with his family often.”

Just as the silence was filled only by the sound of the engine, Shin Ho-jae suddenly began to speak.

“From a certain point, we stopped seeing my uncle’s family even when we went to my grandmother’s house. It turned out that my uncle had fallen into a cult, squandered his fortune, and had borrowed money from the extended family and relatives under the guise of investments. My house was no exception.”

“…….”

“It was a complete disaster. My uncle blindly believed the cult members and wouldn’t even listen to my father, so eventually, he severed ties with the family entirely… But my father seemed to miss him from time to time. As a child, I couldn’t understand that, but now I think I do. If it had been Shin Yeon-jae, I think I would have continued to worry about him too.”

Shin Ho-jae let out a low cough, as if feeling bashful.

“So, what I’m trying to say is… just because everyone calls someone a monster doesn’t mean you have to do the same. When it comes to blood siblings, even if it’s only half, there are things that others simply don’t know.”

“…….”

Having said that much, Shin Ho-jae fell silent. Jung-hyun figured he was waiting for him to organize his thoughts.

‘Half.’

That’s what Shin Ho-jae had said. He had suspected that Ho-jae vaguely knew about him and Kwon Ki-hyuk, but it seemed he knew more than expected. For a moment, he wondered exactly how much the other knew, but then he realized that the extent of his knowledge wasn’t particularly important. After a long silence, Jung-hyun spoke.

“It felt strange. I had never once imagined a scenario where Kwon Ki-hyuk died.”

It was exactly as he said.

Since he was human, he would die eventually; he knew that clearly, yet he had never once imagined that the man would meet his end while he was still alive. He thought he would be strangled by that man, exactly as he was, forever until the day he died.

“…What kind of person was Kwon Ki-hyuk to you?”

Shin Ho-jae asked.

“There’s something you told me once. That in order to let someone go, you have to carve them out from inside you.”

“…….”

“Anything is fine, so just try talking about it. I won’t keep what I hear today in my heart; I’ll just let it flow away.”

Jung-hyun let out a low sigh.

“There wasn’t anything grand enough to describe in such lofty terms. Kwon Ki-hyuk was just… my half-brother, and a child in a grown man’s body.”

“…….”

“I think that’s why. Even while being strangled every night during my childhood, and while the things Kwon Ki-hyuk did were terrifying, I wasn’t afraid of Kwon Ki-hyuk himself.”

Shin Ho-jae knit his brows slightly and looked at Jung-hyun.

“I think it’s because, in a corner of my heart… I understood Kwon Ki-hyuk, who was starving for my father’s love and attention.”

“…Are you sad?”

“Haha. Hardly.”

Jung-hyun laughed with a sound like air escaping a balloon.

“I feel relieved. Yes, I feel relieved.”

The mourning was short. Any mourning he couldn’t finish, his father surely would have done enough of. This was enough for him. Jung-hyun took a deep breath in and out.

“Thank you. Thanks to you, I think I’ve completely carved him out.”

At his words, Shin Ho-jae smiled slightly. Then, after a moment, he asked.

“Are you in contact with your mother?”

Not knowing the intent behind the question, Jung-hyun looked at him.

“I heard from reporter Park Ha-na that the funeral was held a while ago.”

“Ah….”

Jung-hyun trailed off. Since there was no way to contact him, his mother probably couldn’t deliver the news. Of course, even if she had, he didn’t know if he would have attended.

Jung-hyun let out a heavy breath. He still hadn’t been able to contact his mother. It was a simple matter of just calling her, saying he heard the news, and asking if she was doing alright.

Perhaps he was afraid that a single phone call would bring everything back, now that he had cut everyone off and finally achieved this much on his own. Just as he was wearing a bitter smile—

“Should I go see her for you?”

Jung-hyun snapped his head up at Shin Ho-jae’s words.

“I’ll go see if she’s doing well the next time I go back to Korea. I know you’re worried about that.”

“…….”

“Or we could go see her together. Ah, but that probably wouldn’t work.”

Shin Ho-jae immediately changed his mind.

“If your mother treats you harshly, I don’t think I could stand it. I’ll just go see her by myself.”

Jung-hyun remained silent for a long time.

It was strange. Just because Shin Ho-jae said that, the idea of contacting his mother didn’t feel as scary.

Why?

He couldn’t pinpoint the reason immediately, but instead, one thing became vividly clear.

If Shin Ho-jae hadn’t been there, all these events surrounding him would never have reached this conclusion.

What would have happened if Shin Ho-jae hadn’t dragged Kwon Ki-hyuk’s deeds to the surface?

He would have just been holding his breath in a distant foreign land, and Kwon Ki-hyuk’s status would have remained the same. Kim In-jung’s mother would not have been able to resolve to carry out her revenge, as she wouldn’t have had the certainty that Kwon Ki-hyuk was the true culprit.

When Kwon Jung-hyun had given up on Shin Ho-jae to protect him, it was because Shin Ho-jae had disregarded everything to protect Jung-hyun that this ending was possible.

He had felt it was terrible for Shin Ho-jae to give something up for him. He had thought that something built upon sacrifice was as fleeting as a castle built on sand.

But Shin Ho-jae was not like his mother. Nor was he like his father or someone like Kwon Ki-hyuk.

Shin Ho-jae was strong.

His grip on the steering wheel tightened instinctively. This was probably why contacting his mother no longer felt frightening.

Because he realized that Shin Ho-jae was now completely on his side. Because he could clearly feel that such a strong person was supporting him from behind.

Hadn’t Shin Ho-jae been showing him a ‘life built by the two of them’ for a long time already?

* * *

Deep blue darkness had settled over the road leading to the reserved resort. Yellow lights illuminated the log buildings and the Bau River; seeing them alongside the conifers covered in thick snow made it feel as if he had stepped into a scene from a fairy tale.

After parking, they took their luggage and entered the log building used as the reception. Since neither had packed much, their only luggage consisted of a duffel bag and a Boston bag. The skates Shin Ho-jae had packed were the heaviest items among their belongings.

After a short wait, an elderly couple who managed the resort welcomed them warmly. They seemed like a very affectionate couple.

Jung-hyun sat in front of the bonfire and drank the warm tea provided as a welcome drink, while Shin Ho-jae finished the check-in.

“Two rooms, correct? The building is just outside to the left and behind; I’ve assigned you rooms on the upper and lower floors. Unfortunately, there’s no elevator in the building, so please use the floor that suits your preference.”

As she spoke, the wife handed over two keys with wooden rings.

“Do you want to take the downstairs room, Hyung?”

Ho-jae asked as he handed over the keys. Jung-hyun, confirming that the room numbers on the two keys were different, wore an unreadable expression for a moment, but his attention was quickly diverted when the male manager began explaining precautions, mentioning that bears or moose could appear in the area.

“While staying at our resort, please keep your phones away for a while. The internet doesn’t work well anyway! Haha.”

Despite the good-natured man’s joke, Jung-hyun stepped back a pace, looking deep in thought. Since Ho-jae was too preoccupied with him to react, the man finished the rest of his speech with an awkward expression.

“Ahem, anyway, the greatest advantage of our resort is the silence, away from the hustle and bustle of city life. It might be so quiet that you wake up to the sound of an owl hooting in the middle of the night, but that too is a way to fully enjoy our resort. Well then, have a good night.”

Though phrased romantically, it was essentially saying the soundproofing wasn’t very good. Since it was unexpected, Ho-jae turned to Jung-hyun with a slightly bewildered look. Jung-hyun was already walking ahead.

Ho-jae followed him, carrying the luggage. He could feel with his whole body that Jung-hyun’s expression and reaction were quite different from when they had first started the trip.

In truth, considering Jung-hyun’s tastes—much like booking business class—it would have been right to reserve a five-star hotel, but the reason for choosing this resort was purely due to Shin Ho-jae’s greed.

This was the place Ho-jae and his family had planned for a summer vacation, which had been canceled when his father collapsed. From the moment Lake Louise came to mind as a travel destination, he had desperately wanted to come here with Jung-hyun.

His lips felt dry. At this resort, guests could enjoy fondue at the fireplace bar until 10 PM. Since there was nothing to do after sunset and the internet barely worked, it seemed to be the resort’s own way of providing service to its guests.

The photos in the guest reviews looked so atmospheric and wonderful that he had really wanted to try it on their first night. However, because Jung-hyun’s words had noticeably decreased and his facial expression had hardened, it wasn’t the right atmosphere to bring it up. Since it was a scene he had simulated several times while booking the place, it was a shame, but Ho-jae tried to soothe his heart.

It probably wasn’t because he disliked the resort. The Jung-hyun he knew wasn’t the type of person to act immaturely over such things.

There was only one predictable cause. Bringing up his family in the car earlier.

Would it have been better not to mention his mother? The point where he suddenly became quiet seemed to be then.

He saw Jung-hyun, walking ahead, checking the room number on the key. Then, after glancing at Ho-jae, he strode toward the inner hallway with an expressionless face. Shin Ho-jae followed him, his own face becoming serious.

There were two types of rooms at this resort: detached suites and villa rooms within the building.

How much had he agonized over this until the very end? Naturally, he had wanted to book a detached suite. However, the problem was that all the remaining suites were double-bed rooms.

Since the place was modeled after a mountain lodge, the space wasn’t large, and the thought that booking a room with a single king-size bed and a jacuzzi right in the middle would be too transparent wouldn’t leave his head. After long deliberation, Shin Ho-jae eventually chose two villa rooms.

Until now, regardless of Jung-hyun’s will, he had arbitrarily kissed him or helped him ejaculate, but those were actions taken because he wanted Jung-hyun to look at him properly. If he hadn’t done that, a person like Kwon Jung-hyun would have very easily pushed him outside the line.

But what about now? Finally, Jung-hyun had embarked on this trip to look at him properly. In short, he was currently on a trial. That’s why he had to be even more cautious.

“Give me the luggage.”

At Jung-hyun’s words, Ho-jae snapped his head up to find him already standing there, having opened his room door with the key. Shin Ho-jae handed him the Boston bag he was holding.

“I’ve requested breakfast to be delivered to the room tomorrow morning. If there are any foods you can’t eat, please let me know. I’ll tell them to leave it ou—”

“Why did you book two rooms?”

What? Shin Ho-jae asked blankly before composing his expression and answering.

“I thought that would allow you to rest more comfortably, Hyung.”

“Ah.”

Jung-hyun let out a short, hollow laugh.

“Thanks for the consideration.”

“……Do you perhaps not like the room?”

“Of course not. Breakfast comes to the room? There isn’t any particular food to leave out.”

“Ah, yes….”

“Good night.”

Jung-hyun smiled strangely and closed the door.

Click. Hearing the sound of the door closing, Shin Ho-jae turned around with a dazed face. To go up to his own room on the upper floor, he had to walk straight down the hallway and use the stairs. Shin Ho-jae’s steps stopped dead in front of the stairs. He turned back.

The question of why there were two rooms, the pheromone he felt before the door closed.

There’s no way, I must have misread it, he muttered to himself, but his feet moved forward, forward.

As soon as he arrived in front of the room, Shin Ho-jae urgently knocked on the door. The door opened immediately. Shin Ho-jae poured out his words in a somewhat frantic tone.

“I know this sounds ridiculous. But right now, your pheromone is exactly like……”

The sentence couldn’t be finished. It was because Jung-hyun grabbed the back of Shin Ho-jae’s neck and kissed him just like that.

145 – Puck Drop