#093

‘Can’t he even tell me who he made the promise with?’

I racked my brain, trying to find a clue in Athanas’s silence.

‘I don’t think he looked this haggard when he handed over the reliquary.’

That was only a few hours ago.

What could have happened in that short span of time?

‘Maybe it was too dark then for me to notice anything strange, but…’

One thing was for sure: he didn’t look this exhausted when he was sleeping beside me yesterday.

“Can you not even tell me who you made the promise with?”

“…I made the promise with myself.”

“What?”

“Because no matter what one does, they cannot escape themselves.”

‘What is he talking about?’

A promise with himself?

Isn’t that usually just called a ‘resolve’ or a ‘vow’?

“Um… so you’re saying you promised yourself not to tell others about the worries you’re currently having?”

Athanas nodded silently.

I felt a bit dumbfounded.

‘…Couldn’t he just say he resolved not to whine to other people?’

I was worried he’d encountered some weirdo and gotten hit with a Curse.

Come to think of it, he looked about this tired when he suddenly had a nosebleed.

“I see. Understood.”

“…You aren’t going to ask further?”

“Huh? You said you vowed to yourself not to tell.”

What does he want from me?

Is he saying he won’t bring up his worries first, but he’s willing to answer if someone asks?

‘Like, “I vowed not to order delivery food starting today, but I never said I wouldn’t eat it if someone else ordered it for me,” something like that?’

“If I ask you to tell me, will you tell me what your worries are?”

“I will speak if I judge that disclosing them would be more beneficial.”

“And? Is it currently a situation where disclosing them to me would be more beneficial?”

Athanas opened his mouth, then closed it.

“…It does not seem so yet.”

“I see. Then tell me when that time comes.”

Athanas frowned slightly and spoke.

“Do you not feel suspicious or annoyed that I am… acting so frustratingly? Do you not feel that a person who hides things in this manner cannot be trusted…?”

“What? No way! Athanas, you let it slide immediately when I said I had something I wanted to keep secret! I have no intention of prying into things you wish to hide either.”

“…….”

Athanas looked at me with a subtle expression.

I thought that was the best possible answer, but…

‘His reaction is damn lukewarm.’

What does he want?

‘Was he planning to lead this into a “let’s confess everything and hide nothing from each other” kind of thing?’

Not a chance.

I will never reveal the fact that I was a player, even if it kills me.

Think about it. If someone told me, “You don’t know me, but I’ve played your life simulator for about 300 hours, so I know you damn well,” what would I think?

Would I think, “Wow, you know me so well! We’ll be great friends!”?

‘It would be fucking creepy and disgusting.’

For both my sake and Athanas’s, it was better to keep it a secret.

“Ah, right. There was something else I was curious about….”

“…Ask your question.”

“What did you put inside the reliquary?”

To change the subject, I asked about the thing that had been bothering me.

The contents of the reliquary were wrapped in linen, so I couldn’t tell what they were from a glance. Of course, I could just peel back the cloth myself, but I didn’t want to witness something akin to a ‘image excluded due to harmful results’ and suffer mental trauma.

‘If possible, I wouldn’t even want to know indirectly, but…’

What if Athanas really put a part of his own body in there?

If a creature of the Distorted One bit into those contents and used ‘Distortion,’ it might have been affected.

And if it had added things like ‘Tracking’ or ‘Paranoia’ as a bonus….

“Did you not open it to check?”

“I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Uh, I find things like severed body parts to be very frightening. It’s probably because I haven’t received the Blessing of Order.”

“Then it would be better to remain ignorant.”

I stopped fiddling with the reliquary.

‘So that confirms it is a part of a human body.’

“…Whose part is it? At least tell me that.”

“It is mine.”

“What? No, why on earth did you put your own part in there? What if it was stolen by a Vassal of the Othergod along with the reliquary, do you know what they would do with it….”

“And so, was it stolen?”

For a moment, I was speechless.

I did get it back, but it had been snatched away once.

‘He already got incredibly angry, asking if I was sane just for being alone with Andrea, so if I tell him I even met a creature of the Othergod today, he’s going to absolutely flip out…’

Above all, I had been in a situation today where I couldn’t even use my confident ‘trump card,’ so I had no excuse.

‘…He already sees me as a total pushover, but if he hears about this, he’ll think I’m a hopeless, bottom-tier piece of trash.’

But if I don’t report it because I’m afraid of being scolded, that’s when I actually become bottom-tier.

“…I’ll tell you, so please listen without interrupting.”

‘Still, I gained a lot in the end, so he’ll be less angry after hearing the whole story.’

“So, here is what happened….”

As I recounted the events, I emphasized several times that Andrea didn’t suspect me at all and that the creature was too stupid to be very dangerous.

“…And so, everything was resolved well. It was also a good choice that you didn’t visit the orphanage, Athanas. If you had come, you might have triggered Bishop Andrea’s ‘distorted’ perception, and the situation could have turned extreme.”

Bishop Andrea showed an abnormally strong hostility toward Athanas.

It must have cost quite a few points to ‘distort’ it to that extent.

“Please continue to be careful not to run into Bishop Andrea. I’ve persuaded him not to act rashly by telling him I would deceive you, but I don’t know how he will react when he actually encounters you. We must not provoke Andrea until Adelaide’s safety is secured. Do you understand?”

Instead of answering, Athanas stared intently at me.

I felt a terrifying pressure.

‘Seeing as no System message popped up, he’s really just staring at me purely…’

“U-um, if you have a complaint, say it in words. Don’t glare at me so scarily.”

“…Are you finished speaking?”

“Huh?”

“You told me not to interrupt, so I waited.”

‘…So he just glared the whole time?’

What a weirdo.

“Then, if I say I’m actually not finished, are you going to keep your mouth shut?”

“…….”

Athanas frowned.

Realizing this was no time for jokes, I quickly wiped the smile off my face.

“I’m sorry. I’ve finished what I wanted to say, so you may speak now.”

And I hurriedly added before Athanas could snap at me.

“U-um, I am reflecting deeply on my lack of foresight, so please don’t be too angry.”

A series of pathetic excuses followed. That if he got too angry, I might think about hiding my mistakes next time; that if he let it slide just once, this wouldn’t happen again; that this was the best I could do….

“Stop.”

Athanas reached out and clamped his hand over my mouth.

“…I will not be angry, so please shut your mouth.”

I gulped.

‘How is this “not being angry”?’

His expression looked fucking pissed.

He was already exhausted to death, and listening to a goblin’s excuses seemed to have pushed him over the edge.

Athanas let out a long breath. It sounded less like a sigh and more like a groan of pain.

“Fabio. You truly are….”

‘Truly what?’

A human who is incredibly annoying?

‘But if you think about it, shouldn’t I be the one who’s pissed right now?’

In the first place, if he hadn’t just handed over the reliquary without consulting me, Andrea wouldn’t have snapped.

I was the one who faced the danger due to a misjudgment, and I was the one who resolved it and obtained information.

Athanas was the one who knew nothing until it was all over and only heard the report belatedly.

What loss did he suffer that justifies him losing his temper?

“…Do you believe you were in the wrong?”

I pointed to the hand covering my mouth. I meant, how could I answer while my mouth was blocked?

But Athanas was firm.

“Nod if you admit it, or shake your head if you do not.”

‘…He’s completely blocking any attempt to blur the point with both-sides-ism.’

As expected of a future Heretic Inquisitor.

Regardless, he made me admit that ‘I am the one who did wrong’ first.

He knows exactly how to seize the initiative in a conversation.

‘Now that I look at it, staring at me with those hollow eyes was probably a performance to make me feel intimidated and guilty.’

Athanas is a genius of facial acting, after all.

Even if he isn’t actually feeling it, pretending to be furious to the top of his head would be simple.

‘…Is there no law in the Church of Order stating that expressions of intent made under coercion are void?’

I reluctantly nodded.

“Admitting a mistake is also a vow not to repeat the same action next time. Do you agree?”

‘Of course.’

There was only one thing I did wrong in this incident.

I failed to predict that even my trump card would be nullified.

It was a relief that it worked out, but if it had gone wrong, the result would have been horrific. The sensation of my life flashing before my eyes was still vivid.

‘If I had known beforehand that I’d be in a situation where calling the Saintess was impossible, I wouldn’t have gone there no matter what.’

When I nodded, Athanas continued.

“…Then, promise me that from now on, you will prioritize your own safety above all else at any moment.”

I blinked.

‘Why bother?’

The request to promise something so obvious was so strange that I couldn’t nod immediately.

I didn’t understand why Athanas was saying this to me.

‘I’m already doing that without needing a promise.’

To be honest, if my own safety had been perfectly guaranteed, I wouldn’t have cared whether this Dark Realm perished or not. I would have lived with my eyes closed and ears plugged, thinking that whatever happened was beyond my control.

‘I can’t exactly shake my head here….’

With a lukewarm feeling, I nodded.

Athanas’s face softened slightly.

“You have clearly promised.”

‘…What is this?’

It was just a verbal promise, not a binding contract or oath, but it felt strange.

‘Seeing as nothing popped up in the System window, it means it’s not something interfering with my mind…’

As soon as Athanas removed his hand from my mouth, I asked immediately.

“…What happens if I break the promise?”

“Nothing special happens. However, you will lose a bit of my trust.”

If you break a promise, you lose the other person’s trust….

It was a very ordinary sentence, but coming from Athanas, it didn’t sound ordinary.

“…And what happens if I lose your trust?”

“If there is no trust between two people, there is no need to respect the other’s opinion. Is that not so?”

94 – #094