By Zephyria 
“…Are you okay, Noah?”
“Do I look okay?”
“No, well… um…”
“……”
“I’m sorry.”
Without being told, Carlisle scurried down under the bed and knelt down, actively appealing his remorse. It seemed that Allen hadn’t just tried to put him to sleep, as he had even bled from his nose. When I returned to my room from the great bath, Carlisle, who was still asleep, didn’t remember Allen coming at all. And then, after seeing my body, which was stained with handprints and bite marks here and there, he had been like that ever since.
A drooping dog’s ear overlapped with his gloomy head. I was determined not to let my heart melt at that illusion anymore. That’s a wolf. Not a cute puppy.
“Are you really sorry?”
“Y-Yes. Of course.”
“That’s strange… but why do you look so strangely satisfied…”
“……”
Look at him now. He might have some feelings of regret and pity. But first of all, his sense of accomplishment and satisfaction is greater. The blush on his cheeks is so soft. The gray eyes that he’s forcibly lowering are sparkling with vitality. Compared to the darkened appearance he had when he came to me in the early morning, this is almost a completely different person.
Carlisle couldn’t deny it and glanced up at me while still kneeling, then leaned his head on my knee. His docile eyes looked up at me. Is it because Carlisle is the only one who is younger than me? I can’t help but think he’s hopelessly cute.
“Hmm, I should have taken care of the cleanup for you…”
His attempt to escape from the unfavorable topic was clumsy but effective. I sighed lightly and stroked Carlisle’s head. Carlisle seemed to be secretly bothered by the fact that I had already washed my body clean when he woke up. It was so like Carlisle to believe without question that I had washed first because he didn’t wake up and my body felt sticky. If it had been Andrew or Adrian, I would have had to come up with excuses for how I got the water when I couldn’t even move and didn’t seem to have called a servant, or even for going to the bath.
“Carlisle.”
“……”
As I continued to stroke his head without thinking, the weight on my knees became heavy. When I looked down, Carlisle was already dozing off again. He hadn’t been able to sleep properly since receiving the letter, so was he finally relieved now? The warm body temperature that was resting on my knees and sleeping soundly felt incredibly young in an instant. I wondered if this child was suffering because he was involved with someone like me, but I shook my head. It was time to stop thinking like this. I promised not to abandon him. Then it was time to take responsibility from now on.
Okay, then I’ll soothe him and send Carlisle out first… then I’ll go straight to Andrew’s place and secretly bring a Potion… Ah. What about the messed up sheets…? Now that it’s come to this, it’s better to be honest with Nicole about Carlisle….
I was turning over the things I had to do in my head. With a languid yawn, Carlisle opened his eyes again.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Ah…. I dozed off. Did I sleep for a long time?”
“No, just for a moment.”
Hoo……. He took a long breath, rubbed his cheek against my knees and thighs, and then jumped up in an instant. It was too much of a ceremony to chase away sleep.
“I can’t do this. Being here with you is too good. It’s so good… I can’t do anything. I feel like I’m going to become a moron who just stays like this.”
“That’s quite a reaction for lending you my knees.”
“First of all, I’ll be waiting outside the capital. It would be better to talk about the next thing after your wedding. I want to take you to the Territory of Graham as you are, but…”
“Carlisle, I…”
“Don’t be sorry, Noah. I’m more sorry. I’m sorry that I can’t give you up as you want.”
Because I still ended up loving you.
His gentle voice, tinged with a faint smile, somehow carried the scent of long-held tears.
“Perhaps doing as you originally intended is the rational path for the Grand Duke’s heir. I know that well. But… I can’t do as you wished. That… didn’t work out.”
Faced with the young beast confessing his sorrow for still loving me, what more could I do? I repeatedly promised Carlisle that I would never leave like that again, that I wouldn’t abandon him, and kissed his weary eyes. Carlisle said that was enough, hugged me tightly once, and then left as quickly as he had come.
Standing by the window where Carlisle had left, I blankly gazed outside. It was nearing noon. The magic Allen had cast seemed to be wearing off, as the familiar sounds of daily life gradually began to mingle with the still-silent mansion, in contrast to the brightly shining sunlight. The gardener, thinking he had overslept, rushed out with his shears in a flustered state, and the stableman, still looking sleepy, yawned repeatedly as he slowly headed towards the Stable. Stretching my neck out the window, I could see a cluster of lilac-colored stock flowers in the distance. It was towards the room Allen was currently using, the room I originally used.
In this last chance with the bright sunshine. Yellow tulips were not planted in the garden in front of my room’s terrace. Filling the space in front of Allen’s room were still lilac stock flowers. At least I had kept one thing, no matter how the ending turned out. A soft smile spread across my weary face.
“Young Master!”
Without a knock, the door burst open with a bang, and a familiar voice rang out boisterously. “Wow, I must be crazy, I’ve never overslept like this before, really, Young Master, you know that, right? I’m sorry, what was I thinking? I didn’t even stay up late yesterday! By the way, it’s not just me, the kitchen staff and even the head butler, everyone in the mansion is…!” The chattering, energetic voice tapped at my nerves like dewdrops at dawn. Even the faint melancholy that had lingered unknowingly flew away on that voice.
“It’s okay, Nicole. I just woke up too.”
“You must be hungry. Just a moment, I’ll tidy up the sheets and bring you a meal right away…? Right…? Right…, aw…, ay…?”
As he crossed the drawing room and approached me by the window, the voice that had been rattling on faltered as if it had broken down. His dark brown eyes widened as much as they could as he took in my appearance, clad only in a flimsy dressing gown. Of course, it wasn’t because he was unaccustomed to seeing me in a dressing gown at this point. His horrified gaze darted back and forth between my mottled neck, bare chest, forearms, and calves before finally, “Eek, Young Master!” Nicole finally screamed.
“W-w-who is it? What rude person! How dare they, ugh…”
He clutched the back of his neck and collapsed, unable to finish his sentence as if his blood pressure was rising. I hurriedly got up and supported Nicole. Should I lay him down on the bed, I wondered, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. The bed was covered in a clearly identifiable, whitish, sticky fluid.
“Ughhh! What, what is this!”
“Nicole… Nicole?”
“Did His Royal Highness the Crown Prince visit, last night?”
“…….”
“Young Master!”
While I was wondering where to begin explaining, Nicole’s complexion turned increasingly pale as he considered something. I quickly opened my mouth.
“Lest you misunderstand, that… it wasn’t like I didn’t want it and was forced or anything… um, nothing like that.”
“Of course it shouldn’t be!”
“But the other party wasn’t His Royal Highness the Crown Prince, you see…….”
“Yes…?”
“You have to keep it a secret,” I whispered softly near Nicole’s ear. Although there was no one else around to hear.
“Grand Duke Graham came last night.”
“Hick…!”
“Well, he said he’ll be staying outside the capital until the National Wedding Ceremony… but it seems like he’ll be visiting often even after entering the Imperial Palace.”
“Young Master! A-a-are you crazy? What if you get caught!”
Still pale, Nicole mimed cutting his own throat with the edge of his hand. The frantic gestures were so desperate.
“Even if emperors and empresses who were strategically married each had mistresses, judging from His Royal Highness the Crown Prince’s current state, he would never, ever allow it. If you get caught, really, ugh…! Ah, no, if you like Little Duke Graham that much, you should somehow call off the Royal Wedding even now and flee to the Grand Duchy Territory altogether…!”
Fortunately, Nicole didn’t seem to be thinking of blaming me for committing the immoral act of seeing someone else while engaged. Having clearly witnessed the Crown Prince’s madness while I was gone, Nicole was worried about what kind of retaliation the Crown Prince might take against the spouse who cheated on him.
“Then shouldn’t we just not get caught?”
“Well… yes?”
“Great, I’m counting on you!”
“For what…?”
“What else? I’m saying please help me not get caught even after entering the Imperial Palace.”
“Ughhh, Young Master!”
I hid the fact that the Little Duke, whose physical abilities were incomparably superior to humans, would take care of things himself, and I teased Nicole, who was completely out of his mind. Still, I was being quite considerate. I didn’t tell him that the person I was playing with fire with in the Empress Palace included not only Carlisle but also the noble Little Count of our mansion, whom he had never imagined.