By Zephyria 
My scalp ached from the tightly pulled hair. I didn’t know how terribly boiling anger was hidden beneath his seemingly fine face, and without even thinking about controlling his strength, he indiscriminately dragged my body, which was slumped over the unconscious Carlisle.
“Ah…!”
My limp legs collapsed like a sandcastle the moment they came down from the bed. The reason I didn’t fall headfirst, embarrassingly burying my face, was, ridiculously, thanks to the hair Allen was holding onto. My posture, almost kneeling with my neck bent painfully, was not intentional, but it was close to subjugation. Although the person who made me kneel didn’t seem very pleased.
“…It hurts. Let go.”
My voice still had lingering sobs. The hole where my penis had been pulled out and the inside couldn’t even be closed. The sensation of the semen that Carlisle had spilled so abundantly on the floor flowing out was so vivid that even if I tried to remain calm, my shoulders kept twitching imperceptibly.
It seemed that Allen had only felt a surge of anger and hadn’t deliberately grabbed my hair to humiliate me, as he let go of my hair without much of a response. My body collapsed onto the cold floor with a thud. He didn’t pick me up but instead pulled on the bedsheet under Carlisle. Then, after confirming that most of it was already soaked with the bodily fluids of two people, he touched his forehead with his hand. He closed his eyes tightly and trembled his chin.
“…Okay, I understand.”
It was a sudden admission. I was still collapsed on the floor, barely breathing, and looked up at him.
The pale face, like a sculpture viewed from the cold floor, was filled with a precarious tension rather than dignity.
“I understand that you’ve decided not to love me anymore. I like that the feelings you give to that Crown Prince or Little Count are affection. I admit that what makes me angry enough to want to overturn this ridiculous bet right now is… jealousy.”
“You… what are you trying to say?”
Once again, a nosebleed flowed down his expressionless white face. Because he didn’t wipe it away, the particularly prominent bloodstains stained his lips and chin, and even his neat clothes, messily. It was a painfully bright red color. But, he opened his mouth calmly, saying.
“That guy is not allowed.”
“……”
“Fate is powerful, Noah.”
“……”
“If I intervene any more, the already weakened world might not be able to withstand it. It might shatter before our bet is even over. So I can’t intervene.”
Whether the sun had already risen, a hot air rushed in through the window that Carlisle had opened. The cold floor, filled with the summer sunlight, was warmed warmly. My tired body welcomed the warmly heated floor, but his voice, pouring down from above, was colder and more chilling than a winter blizzard.
“If I don’t intervene, fate will keep struggling to find its original form. Like inertia. The closer you get to that guy, the more the fate associated with him will try to repeat itself like inertia.”
You know what your fate with that guy was now. The anger felt in the quietly continuing low voice was perhaps fear. He slowly lowered his posture and met my gaze. Only one knee was touching the ground. A long finger flicked up my chin.
“You’ll want to use that guy to die again. You’ll want to escape without fail.”
“……”
“Tell me. Is that really what you want?”
I couldn’t bring myself to nod. If I were the me of the first life, who was willing to risk death if only I could escape from God, from this man in front of me… No. There’s no need to go that far. If it were just the me from a few months ago, I would have nodded without hesitation. Because this time, it was really the end of everything. My soul, worn out to the point of being worn down, would no longer be able to withstand the repetition and would shatter into pieces and disappear.
But.
‘I only wish. Please allow me this life. No matter what moment comes, I will not give up on you. Even if every day cannot be happy, I will try to make you feel happy at least in the moment we fall asleep together. I love you, Noah. I will bet my whole life on you alone.’
I remember so vividly the appearance of my fiancé, who confessed his love with violet eyes, unusually shyly smiling.
‘I won’t ask for more. Noah. If you tell me to give up everything as it is and continue to be a beast in the Imperial Palace, I will do so… I wouldn’t dare to make things difficult for you, so please just allow me to watch you from nearby.’
Rather than blaming me, who had only deceived and deceived him from the beginning by hiding my identity, the high temperature of the lovely beast, who desperately wished to be allowed to be by my side, had warmed my shoulders just a few minutes ago.
‘Are you trying to repay me for mistreating you in this way? If that’s the case, then good. Use me as you please. I won’t dare to covet your love… Just don’t push me away. Noah, don’t… Don’t push me away like this…’
What about the voice of the noble Little Count, who whispered so weakly like a candle about to be blown out in the wind, never even dreaming that the root of my soul was his true brother?
…I don’t want to die. Not like this, really, at least not like this.
My inner voice, which I had never even consciously recognized, surged up like a burst of sorrow.
Even if it was just for one day, I wanted to be completely free from the clutches of the arrogant God and live happily without any worries with those who loved me, and those whom I might someday come to love.
“I don’t want you to die.”
“…Allen.”
“If I only wanted that, if I wanted to vent my anger on you for not following my will, I would have already achieved my goal long ago. You may not want to believe it, Noah.”
“……”
“I am in love with you.”
It’s just not in the way you want. After finishing speaking, he lifted my body, which was covered in teeth marks and handprints, high in his arms. And then, without hesitation, he stepped over my door and walked down the long hallway.
Even if people were asleep, it was inevitably shameful to go outside the room without a single thread on, with someone else’s semen dripping between my legs.
The place he carried me down to was the large bathhouse located in the basement. Usually, I would draw water from here and wash in the bathtub in my room, so it was my first time coming down here directly. Allen said that his abilities were precarious because he had forcibly subdued the resisting Carlisle, so he couldn’t help it and I had to bear with the inconvenience. He seemed to be thinking of maintaining the ‘human’ form, ‘my’ body, until the very end.
Was he really intending to wash me, saying things like ‘let’s wipe your body first’ earlier? He poured warm water prepared in the large bathhouse endlessly over my head and shoulders. Swish, swish. Wherever the torrential stream of water passed, the thickly embedded bodily fluids were cleanly washed away.
I stayed still for the time being, doing as he did. It didn’t seem like he was going to do anything crazy right away.
He spoke grandly, as if being close to Carlisle was something that hastened my death, but I had no intention of going along with that insolent prediction.
It probably wasn’t a lie. That without his artificial intervention, the world would try to follow the same path as my first life, which had already been completed once. Meeting Lennox, and meeting Carlisle again while disguised as a servant… I had experienced firsthand that it was quite similar to the appearance of my first life, if not for the forcibly changed Setting values. Fate is indeed powerful. It’s an opponent that can’t be underestimated at all.
However, that’s why I have no intention of complying without any resistance. If I had chosen to comply with fate, I would probably have remained by Allen’s side forever like a paper doll as his mate long ago.
Someday, Carlisle might stop loving me, or get tired of me… At least, that couldn’t be the reason I left Carlisle’s side. Because I promised. This time, I promised that I would never abandon him.
“I can guess roughly what you’re thinking with that small head…”
It was around the time when most of the sticky liquids on my body had been washed away. Allen grabbed my chin and whispered, kissing my lips thickly.
“But still, wouldn’t it be better to keep your distance? Unless you want to get pregnant before the bet is even over.”
“What?”
“If the Alpha or Omega trait is a Blessing I bestow, then having the characteristics of a Sacred Beast is a trace of the Blessing that the Ancient God bestowed. Those who carry that Blessing in their bodies can impregnate anyone they want, regardless of gender.”
I was racking my brain, wondering what this was all about, when his remaining hand swept down and dug into my crotch in one swift motion.
“You know that the Graham Clan’s children are conceived as wolves and born as wolves, right? For your information, the gestation period for wolves is about two months.”
“……!”
And then, in the very next moment, a long finger was brutally thrust into the gap that was still not completely closed.