By Zephyria 
“Some monsters can regenerate even if their arms are cut off. They’re over 3 meters tall and so strong that ordinary people get ripped in half if they’re caught.”
“Strong? Is that monster white?”
Sakira, who had been explaining various monsters, tilted her head at my question.
“Why do you keep talking about white monsters? Do you know one?”
“Maybe. It feels like it’s on the tip of my tongue… What is it?”
“Huh? You know a monster, really?”
Just as I was getting impatient with something I couldn’t quite grasp, the tightly closed carriage door opened. As Sakira had said, Abyss was perfectly fine, not a hair out of place.
“Are you hurt anywhere?”
“Shouldn’t I be asking you that? Did you catch the bird?”
“It didn’t seem to have any intention of attacking. It just flapped its wings a few times and left. It was so big and a monster I’ve never seen before, so I thought we should get away quickly.”
“Okay, then. How much further do we have to go?”
“About 8 hours. We’ll be driving non-stop, so you should get some sleep.”
Abyss handed me some game cards and a few books while he was talking. His demeanor was somehow reassuring, so I impulsively said,
“You’re like a dad.”
“……Pardon?”
“Cough……”
Abyss’s face turned pale in an instant, and Sakira, who had been quietly beside him, made a sound as if she was choking.
Did I say something wrong? I was flustered by their excessive reaction.
“No, your actions… It’s just a joke.”
“W-What kind of joke is that…… How could I dare…… Just call me brother……. Ah, no. Not even brother!”
Abyss, after saying it himself, was startled and shouted. I flinched without realizing it at his shuddering, and Sakira pushed Abyss away with her foot.
“Stop saying weird things and get out. Get out, get out!”
“Ah, anyway, if you need to stop the carriage urgently, please tell me!”
The carriage door slammed shut with a loud noise. But the door quickly reopened, and Abyss peeked his head out.
“I didn’t close it hard, the wind blew it shut.”
“……”
“Then we’ll depart.”
I nodded with a sullen expression, and the door closed smoothly without a sound.
“Ahem, ahem.”
Sakira cleared her throat a few times and then changed the subject.
“Now that your health has improved a lot, is there anything you want to do?”
It wasn’t like I said anything wrong, and it was obviously a joke, but I couldn’t understand why they were so disgusted. I was curious, but I didn’t think they would give me a straight answer, so I just didn’t ask.
“Something I want to do? I don’t know……”
I’ve never thought about that. For the past few years, I’d faint and wake up to find the seasons had changed, and I was always sick, so I didn’t have time to think about the future.
Losing my memory is also a factor. Every time I try to remember something, I get a headache, so I intentionally avoid thinking about it. I tried hard to just be blank.
And they said my health has improved, but the truth is that it was common for it to get worse again, so I wasn’t particularly happy.
“There’s plenty of time, so think about it slowly. If you want to do something, be sure to tell me. I have a lot of money, you know. I can do anything Aska wants.”
“……”
Sakira pounded her left chest with her fist as if to say, trust me. I wanted to ask why you’re trying to do everything I want, but I had a feeling she wouldn’t give me a straight answer either.
Most of the people in the store didn’t want to think about my past. If they hadn’t taken care of me so devotedly, I would have thought I was a terrible person who only did bad things in the past.
If that wasn’t the case, there would be no reason not to tell me.
“How much money do you have?”
I wasn’t really curious, but I didn’t have anything else to say, so I asked.
“A lot. Actually, I earn a lot, but they sometimes give me pocket money, so whatever amount you imagine, it’s probably more. They gave us a lot when we broke up, too. Aska has never had a good sense of money……”
“……”
How am I supposed to react to this? Was it like alimony? Embarrassing…….
I closed my mouth and was silent before changing the subject.
“Aren’t you just a shopkeeper who sells daily necessities? Does your business do that well?”
“Well, it’s similar……. Anyway, you don’t have to worry about money. Haha, I never thought the day would come when I’d say these words to Aska.”
I nodded, looking at Sakira, who was smiling as if it was amazing.
“I’ll think about what I want to do slowly.”
“Yes, and what if you don’t want to do anything? You can just live like a loafer. Just don’t do gambling or drugs. Don’t drink alcohol either, and smoking is bad for your health……”
“……”
You told me to do whatever I wanted, but the things I shouldn’t do are increasing. I used the grateful nagging full of worries that started without warning as a lullaby and went to sleep.
¸.•¨•¸.•¨•¸.•¨•¸
The ride was surprisingly comfortable, but I couldn’t sleep deeply. I kept falling asleep and waking up, and I felt like I had a dream, but I couldn’t remember it.
“Get off slowly. Shall I hold you?”
I wasn’t fully awake yet, so I took Abyss’s hand and got out of the carriage.
“Aska!”
“Welcome!”
“Weren’t you tired? Do you want to wash up and change first?”
“You haven’t eaten yet, have you? You need to eat something to take your medicine.”
I couldn’t even open my eyes properly, and I greeted them in a daze, then staggered inside. I was strangely drowsy until I was undressed, washed, ate, and took my medicine.
Is my condition getting worse again? It was as expected. I’m glad I didn’t have any expectations.
“You just need to rest.”
But contrary to my worries, the conclusion was that this was simply travel fatigue, not the chronic illness that had been tormenting me for the past five years. Abyss and Sakira, who had been worried, seemed relieved at the doctor’s words.
I was just sitting in the carriage, but I got travel fatigue from that? Is it because I’m weak? Anyway, it was absurd.
“If it weren’t for the monster, we would have traveled leisurely……. I’m sorry.”
Abyss bowed his head with a pained expression, even though it wasn’t his fault.
“We’ll go out, so take a nap. If you need anything, call us.”
Sakira left a small bell where my hand could reach it and took the gloomy Abyss out.
When I’m sick, the best thing to do is just lose consciousness and sleep, but because I’m only moderately sick, I couldn’t fall asleep. I had severe muscle pain, so I closed my eyes and tossed and turned in bed, eventually raising my upper body.
I grabbed the back of my neck and moved my head from side to side when I suddenly heard a small noise in my ear. It was so faint and small that I thought it was the sound of the wind at first, but the intervals were regular.
Tap, tap, tap.
It was like lightly tapping a table with the tip of a fingernail. I got out of bed like an old man and focused on the sound.
At first, I didn’t know where it was coming from, but after listening for a while, I realized it was coming from the window. I threw open the thick curtains, but all I could see was the dark night sky.
Just in case, I pressed my face close to the glass and stared into the darkness. As expected, I couldn’t see anything.
Tap, tap.
Then I heard the unidentified sound again.
“……”
It was so small that I hadn’t seen it, but some kind of brown chick was pecking at the window with its sticky beak. It was so out of the blue that I thought I was hallucinating at first.
When my condition was really bad, I would often hear hallucinations or see illusions. But it was too realistic to be that.
The chick, who was staring at me, started headbutting the glass as if asking me to let it in. If its head breaks from that, I’ll have a bad dream, so I carefully opened the window. The chick fluttered into my face.
I reflexively held out my palm, and it landed on it as if it had been waiting, but it was so light that I couldn’t even feel its weight.
It was too much to call it a chick…….
“……”
What should I call this? It was like a giant eagle made small.
―Cheep, cheep.
“……”
―Cheeping.
“……”
A very thin and clear musical sound like the tone of an instrument struck my eardrums. The bird cried a few more times like that and then, exhausted, spun around a couple of times in place and then collapsed.
“Are you sleeping?”
I asked, dumbfounded, as I watched it close its eyes. But the bird didn’t move and didn’t cry anymore.
What is this situation? No, what is this bird and why is it acting like it knows me? Is it just being friendly? Is it just looking for a place to rest because it’s cold at night?
I was dumbfounded, but I couldn’t kick it out, so I just closed the window and drew the curtains again. There was no big movement until I carefully returned to the bed and slowly placed it next to the pillow.
The bird, who glanced at me as I got into bed with a bewildered expression, fluttered its wings, puffed out its chest, and then lowered its head.
It was an action that clearly said, I’m going to sleep now, so don’t talk to me, so I muttered without realizing it.
“Oh, okay. Good night……”