By Zephyria 
“Jeong-min!”
He had never once imagined he would have the pleasant experience of being called by name by someone he liked in the middle of a bustling downtown area in broad daylight. Perhaps because the past where such things could have happened had ended before they ever began.
“Shin-woo hyung.”
Jeong-min smiled brightly and approached Shin-woo, who was running toward him with a smile. Dressed in light casual wear, Shin-woo was still dazzlingly handsome.
“Wow, Shin Jeong-min looks so cool today!”
Jeong-min, who had been looking at Shin-woo in a daze, looked at him, bewildered by the sudden compliment.
“Aren’t you the one who’s cool, Hyung?”
“What are you talking about. You’re cooler than me. People kept staring at you. Didn’t you notice?”
Was that so? Since he had been staring only at the KakaoTalk messages they exchanged while waiting for Shin-woo, there was no way he would have felt the gaze of others. Jeong-min scratched his cheek, feeling suddenly embarrassed.
“You’ve really grown up well.”
“Ah, why are you acting so proud? Even my mom isn’t this proud of me.”
“No. I’m sure your mother is proud of you too. Did you get some rest?”
“Yeah, I slept in for the first time in a while. It was great.”
“Haha, right? Once you get a taste of that, you can’t escape. Just sleep in moderation.”
“I will. I’m trying not to let myself get too lazy.”
Jeong-min continued a casual conversation as he walked with Shin-woo. He truly couldn’t believe it. It all felt like a dream. Shin-woo might not think so, but Jeong-min was happy because this moment felt like a date between lovers.
After booking the tickets, there were about 30 minutes left until the movie started. Shin-woo suggested eating something quickly at the food court on the same floor, but Jeong-min wanted to eat a leisurely meal with Shin-woo.
“Hyung, let’s eat after the movie. How about some light popcorn?”
“Ah, shall we? They sell sausages and nachos too. Let’s get those.”
Excited like a child, Shin-woo ordered various things. Because both hands were full of food, it was awkward when he couldn’t show the tickets to the staff upon entering the cinema, but everything was just joyful and made him laugh.
The movie was an action film that had recently surpassed ten million viewers, but in reality, Jeong-min couldn’t see the content or hear the sound. His attention was focused solely on the man sitting next to him. Even though he thought he shouldn’t, a smile formed on his face and his heart continued to thumping wildly.
“Jeong-min.”
“Huh?”
“What are you doing? Was it that interesting? It’s over.”
It really was. White text was diligently scrolling up the black screen, and half the audience had already left.
He had tried so hard to look straight ahead and zone out, thinking Shin-woo would notice, that he hadn’t even realized the movie had ended.
“Get a grip, you brat.”
Shin-woo flicked Jeong-min’s forehead once and stood up.
“Let’s go eat.”
“Ah, yeah.”
He looked at Shin-woo’s back as he walked ahead. Then, he slid up to stand beside him. Their reflections appeared side-by-side in the elevator door. Their heights were similar. Although he hadn’t done any particular exercise recently, no matter how he looked, he was an Alpha…. While it felt bitter, he quickly steadied his heart, thinking he should have confidence. Shin-woo had said he would try. That meant he was trying for the current version of him. Jeong-min thought to himself that he shouldn’t be the one who is more ashamed.
“How was the movie?”
“It was okay.”
“Liar.”
They sat in a private room at a traditional Korean restaurant and chatted warmly. As expected, the movie they had just seen came up, and Jeong-min chose the most neutral answer while cold sweat ran down his spine, but Yu Shin-woo laughed as if he didn’t believe him.
“You kept looking only at my face. How did you watch the movie? Do you even remember who the protagonist was?”
Jeong-min ended up dropping his chopsticks.
“Uh…. Um, sorry. Was it distracting?”
“Why be sorry? It’s not like it’s the first or second time you’ve stared at my face. You’ve looked at me like that since the first time we met. So I’m used to the gaze, don’t worry. I enjoyed the movie.”
“Mm-hmm….”
What a relief. Jeong-min smiled as he picked up his chopsticks again. Yu Shin-woo always handled things so kindly, smoothing over situations where the other person might feel embarrassed.
“By the way, Hyung. Were you okay at the theater?”
“I was fine. I think the drug is definitely working well.”
“That’s a relief.”
“I’m starting to wonder if I should just live with this drug.”
At Shin-woo’s words, Jeong-min stopped eating and looked at him. Shin-woo was looking at Jeong-min with a bitter smile. Very seriously.
“Then I wouldn’t have to be forced into a pair with some stranger Omega…. Well, Cal Front invested in me, so they’d throw a fit, but I think I can resolve that to some extent. Taking the drug is a hassle, but I’m used to it now, so it’s not like I’ll forget to take it. And if it’s you, I feel like you’d take good care of me. Right?”
“Shin-woo hyung….”
“I think I shouldn’t give you too much hope, but strangely, every time I see your gaze, my ego swells. I feel like if it’s Shin Jeong-min, you’d do anything for me.”
I can do everything. Anything… For Hyung, I’d throw my body away, I could even become an Omega.
But if he said that now, Shin-woo would definitely feel burdened. He wanted to pull him into an embrace right now, beg him to accept him, and kiss him, but now… not yet.
“If you want it, Hyung, I can do everything. I have a lot of money. If Cal Front asks for a penalty fee, I can pay it, and if they sue, I can bring in the best law firm in the country. But this is about your life. I can’t put you in danger for my own greed. So let’s keep receiving treatment. Don’t give up, Hyung.”
“Yeah, I knew you’d say that.”
Shin-woo smiled and placed the last piece of rolled omelet, Jeong-min’s favorite, on top of Jeong-min’s rice.
“Actually, the Omega I matched with yesterday came out at 86%.”
“Ah….”
His heart sank. And immediately, regret flooded in. He should have just begged. He should have accepted it right away. Why did he pretend to understand and be generous…. His hands, which had barely calmed down, began to shake again. Jeong-min put down his chopsticks and hid his hands under the table.
“Since it’s the highest figure so far, they suggested trying imprinting. But actually, unless it’s over 90%, it’s all the same, so I told them let’s wait a bit longer. If a higher percentage Omega doesn’t appear within three months… I think I’ll imprint with the Omega I matched with yesterday.”
“I see. Right… that makes sense.”
If he can’t become an Omega within three months… is it the end? The period was shorter than he thought. He had already received the drug three times, yet he felt no change in his body. He was told the tremors would get better, but they were shaking again. Nothing was working.
“Jeong-min.”
“Yeah?”
“Shall we see each other every day? Since we’re jobless. We can see each other every day, right?”
“Every day?”
“Yeah. Let’s see each other every day. Let’s wander around more. Let’s do all the things we couldn’t do.”
There was no future in those words. No mention of dating, no mention of wanting to be together. Nothing was decided. It was merely like a mirage. Shin-woo was suggesting they start a relationship that couldn’t be defined as anything.
He is a bad person. A truly selfish person. And yet, Jeong-min thought he had to take that hand. Jeong-min quietly nodded, and a large hand came forward as always to stroke Jeong-min’s hair.
✽✽✽
After that, he met Shin-woo every day. Without fail. They drank a lot, went to amusement parks, and took short trips to the countryside. But they didn’t have a single moment of physical skinship. It felt like they did most of the things friends could do. Ignoring all the anxiety about the future, they thought only of the time when it was just the two of them. Until a text came from Kim Ju-hwan.
The fourth drug has arrived. Come tomorrow.
It was the first contact in nearly two weeks. During that time, he hadn’t exchanged any messages with Kim Ju-hwan. That was how he had been able to ignore everything… Kim Ju-hwan’s text was like a ticket back to reality.
“What are you looking at so intently?”
Shin-woo asked Jeong-min while cutting a steak.
“Ah, Hyung. I don’t think I can meet you tomorrow.”
“Hmm? Why? Boredom already?”
“What are you talking about. It’s not that… something urgent came up.”
“A fling?”
“I said it’s not that. It’s not….”
“I know, I know. You don’t have to tell me. Well, then I should take a break tomorrow for the first time in a while. Finally, a holiday.”
“Hyung, what’s with that comment? As if meeting me was like going to work?”
“Haha, it almost was.”
“You were the one who said let’s meet every day.”
“I might have gone a bit too far. Let’s do a five-day work week. I think we both need our own time occasionally.”
“Wow… a person can change this much.”
When Jeong-min made a fed-up face, Shin-woo quickly apologized and swapped the plate of steak he had neatly cut for Jeong-min’s steak plate. Jeong-min smiled and took a bite of the steak. Looking at the night view that looked as if it would rain at any moment, he tried his best not to face the reality of tomorrow right now.