By Zephyria 
His body felt heavy. As if he might never wake up again. It was so difficult that even opening his eyes was painful, but unlike his body, his mind commanded him to wake up. He forced his eyes open with great effort.
“Ah….”
His vision was blurred. Where on earth was he? Judging by the smell of the space, it seemed to be a hospital… Jeong-min blinked a few times and then frowned. As his vision gradually cleared, it proved that his guess was correct.
“Why the hospital….”
His voice was cracked, perhaps because he was thirsty. He swallowed hard and took a breath. He clearly remembered meeting Kim Ju-hwan yesterday, receiving the pheromone drug… and mixing bodies with him as usual. Then his condition gradually worsened… and in the midst of that, Hyung had called… he remembered trying to go meet Shin-woo hyung and then collapsing…. He couldn’t remember what happened after that.
“I… didn’t die.”
Jeong-min muttered with a slight trace of a smile. He wasn’t talking to himself. He was speaking to the man sitting beside the bed, looking at him with a grave expression.
“I know.”
The man sighed, stood up to bring a glass of water, helped Jeong-min sit up, and then perched on the edge of the bed.
“I’ll drink it.”
As he spoke, Jeong-min’s hand was trembling like an aspen leaf. Not only that, but he lacked strength in his body; his hand rose regardless of his will and then dropped with a thud.
Kim Ju-hwan was afraid to look at Jeong-min. He wanted to avoid it. He didn’t want to admit that Jeong-min’s condition was that bad. But the sight of Jeong-min last night was so poor that it wouldn’t have been strange if he had died. No, he truly thought Jeong-min had stopped breathing.
As Jeong-min’s complexion grew increasingly pale, Kim Ju-hwan had carried him to the research institute. Until he could show him to a doctor… he had checked several times to see if he was still breathing. It was horrific. To the point where he never wanted to experience it again.
“Kim Ju-hwan.”
Looking at Kim Ju-hwan, who was staring blankly at him while holding the water glass, Jeong-min sighed and called his name. Only then did he see the man’s pupils shake, and Jeong-min smiled.
“Hey, I didn’t die.”
“Don’t say things like that, even as a joke.”
Only then did he bring a straw and hold it out to Jeong-min, who drank the water slowly, as if he had been waiting for it.
“Want more?”
“No… I’m okay.”
“Does anything hurt?”
“No. Other than being a bit dizzy….”
“Then lie down.”
“I want to go home….”
“Go after the IV drip is finished.”
After laying Jeong-min down and tucking him in with a blanket, Kim Ju-hwan gazed silently at him. Lately, the number of times Kim Ju-hwan stared at him without speaking had increased. He had stared intently before, but back then it felt like watching an animal in a cage; now… it felt like he was seeing him as a human being.
Feeling slightly burdened by that gaze, Jeong-min intentionally avoided looking at Kim Ju-hwan. But for some reason, he couldn’t avoid that gaze today. If he thought there was worry in those eyes… would that be too much self-consciousness?
“You….”
“Yes.”
“I think you’re worried about me.”
“You only realized that now?”
Jeong-min had expected him to say, ‘Me? No way,’ but he was surprised that he admitted it so readily.
“I don’t know about everyone else, but I’m probably the one most worried about you right now, Sunbae.”
What should he say…. Should he tell him not to joke? Or tell him to stop playing around… or should he say thank you? While he hesitated, Kim Ju-hwan stood up as if no answer was needed.
“Rest a bit more. I’ll go meet your attending physician.”
“…Okay.”
“If anything happens, press that button.”
“Got it.”
As if he had so much left to say, Kim Ju-hwan didn’t leave the hospital room easily. He stood by the door and gazed at Jeong-min for a long while more before finally closing the door and leaving.
Only after the sound of the door closing could Jeong-min close his eyes. Then he slowly lifted his hand. Fortunately, strength had returned to his hand, and he could clench his fist. He could feel it more and more. His body had reached its limit. This was like a final signal from his body.
“Should I… give up?”
He wondered if he should now accept that he couldn’t change the fate decreed by heaven. He felt that only then could he, as well as Yu Shin-woo and Kim Ju-hwan, move forward. But to do that, he would have to stop his feelings for Yu Shin-woo.
The reason he had received the drug last night was because of the phone call from Yu Shin-woo, who had been completely drunk.
‘You’ll become an Omega, right? Jeong-min… you will, right?’
He knew that Shin-woo was struggling. Because lately, almost every time he saw him, he was drinking. Whenever Jeong-min suggested going out for some fresh air or taking a trip, he would react with horror and anger. He would ask if he was in a condition to go outside right now. Seeing him terrified that he might develop a resistance to the drug at any moment, Jeong-min understood, yet a corner of his heart felt suffocated.
Generally, Yu Shin-woo would go to match with an Omega during the day. It had been a long time since Jeong-min had accompanied him to the hospital. He simply waited at home, blankly, for his call to come. He wanted to talk and discuss more things, but Jeong-min never had the chance, and inevitably, his heart began to wither.
And then, after a long time, he called and asked, ‘You’ll become an Omega, right?’ That was why he felt he had to become an Omega. He believed that by becoming an Omega, they could go back to how things were.
“But you know.”
I know. That we can’t go back. Jeong-min smiled bitterly.
✽✽✽
Once Jeong-min’s IV drip was finished, the attending physician entered the room. Kim Ju-hwan had been waiting quietly outside and only stood up when the physician came out.
“He is currently changing his clothes.”
“Are there any abnormalities?”
“Um… as you know, there are no particularly new symptoms other than the ones already appearing. Other than the fact that he has become very weak. For the time being, we should focus solely on his recovery.”
Ju-hwan agreed. In fact, the drug he had given Jeong-min yesterday was merely a nutritional supplement, different from the usual medication. However, a drug rejection reaction had clearly occurred, and seeing how much he struggled… the conclusion was that he couldn’t even accept nutritional supplements now. At this rate, Jeong-min would truly be in danger. But….
“If only he’d listen to me.”
Kim Ju-hwan sighed, leaning his hand against his forehead. Jeong-min’s stubbornness was no joke. He wondered if Jeong-min would accept it gracefully if he suddenly suggested stopping the drug administration.
“He said he would.”
At the physician’s words, Kim Ju-hwan looked at her in surprise.
“When I suggested it would be better to stop the drug administration for a while, he said he would. He mentioned that his body needs to be healthy to hope for the future.”
“…Haa.”
It was a sigh of relief. To not listen to him but listen to the doctor. He didn’t know whether to call that admirable or disappointing. But for now, relief came first. For the time being, he would have to take Jeong-min and feed him some nourishing food.
“Ah, also, looking at the pheromone levels right now, it seems Doctor Shin’s rut will arrive soon, so I’m mentioning it. Since he shouldn’t take suppressants either. Please keep an eye on him and bring him to the hospital immediately if any abnormalities occur.”
“I understand.”
The physician spoke about the precautions for a long time, and Kim Ju-hwan listened with full concentration, missing nothing. Jeong-min, having changed his clothes, opened the hospital room door and came out. Seeing him walk out normally, Kim Ju-hwan finally felt the tension leave his body. Thank god. He is alive.
✽✽✽
After putting Jeong-min in the car, Kim Ju-hwan took the wheel. Before he knew it, this whole situation felt natural.
“Shall we go to your house, Sunbae?”
“Sure.”
With that answer, the car departed. As soon as they left the underground parking lot, light poured in, momentarily blinding him. Because Kim Ju-hwan reacted with more surprise than Jeong-min’s small flinch deserved, Jeong-min laughed. This guy really was worried about me, wasn’t he?
“I’m okay. It was just the glare.”
“You haven’t seen much light, Sunbae. You’ve been shut in the house lately.”
“That’s true.”
“…Since you need to take care of your body for a while, let’s exercise together.”
“Shall we? It’s been a while since I exercised.”
“And let’s eat some nourishing food. I’ve been struggling a bit lately because I couldn’t eat properly due to work.”
“You… were you actually working?”
“Sunbae….”
“Just kidding.”
He knew. He knew better than anyone that Ju-hwan was crazy about work. He had seen him buried in his phone and laptop whenever he wasn’t with him. That was why he couldn’t even ask if he didn’t go to the office.
“Alright. Let’s do that. Let’s eat something delicious too.”
“Um… then shall we go abroad?”
“Abroad, all of a sudden?”
“Exercise, eat delicious food… since you’re resting, it’s better to go somewhere nice.”
A trip…. Even after leaving the hospital, he had lived this way and hadn’t been able to travel alone. Of course, before things became like this, he had visited Busan and a few other domestic spots with Shin-woo, but even then… since moving, they hadn’t gone anywhere together once.
“Shall we….”
“Then I’ll look into it.”
“You said the rut is coming soon… let’s think about it after the rut is over.”
“Okay.”
A sudden brightness appeared on Kim Ju-hwan’s face. It wasn’t very obvious, but that was why Jeong-min could tell. That he was in a good mood right now.
Jeong-min looked out the window at the blue sky stretching between the buildings. He must be exhausted. Seeing that the sky, which he used to look at without a second thought, now felt suffocating….