By Zephyria 
167
“……Yes?”
“I’m sorry.”
“……”
The expression vanished from Ho-eun’s face. The sudden apology was bewildering and disorienting. He couldn’t find the words to reply and only moved his lips, so Tae-muk carefully took Ho-eun’s hand and said,
“I won’t do that again. Never.”
“……”
“I’ll cherish you.”
“……”
“To me, you’re… precious. Very.”
Tae-muk’s lips moved awkwardly as he continued to speak. It was the first time in his life he had ever said such words out loud. But to Tae-muk, Ho-eun was someone he could only describe as precious. No, even that wasn’t enough.
To Tae-muk, Ho-eun was not just his Bondmate. Of course, the fact that he was his destined partner was one of the reasons he was precious, but it was just one of countless reasons.
Ho-eun was beautiful, kind, gentle, smart, good, and… he was the one who made Tae-muk not alone.
Before, Tae-muk had always been alone. Although the Crimson Rain Brigade guys were always swarming around him, in the end, he was alone.
When he returned after being bitten by Devouring Ghouls all day, dragging his tattered limbs, the other guys were all embraced by their Bondmates, comforted in their pain, but Tae-muk had to writhe in agony alone in his empty tent. Maybe it wasn’t agony, but loneliness. No one could help with that, and no one could fix it.
But now, Ho-eun asks if he’s come, if he’s hurt, welcomes him, and worries about him. And he touches him with these pretty hands, and hugs him. It was a hand that caressed not only Tae-muk’s ragged body, but also his heart. How could he not be precious?
Tae-muk glanced at Ho-eun for a moment, then lowered his head and pressed his lips firmly on his wound. After that, he went up along his fingers and kissed the tips of his fingers.
And with his lips buried there, he sighed deeply.
“I wish your wounds would heal when I touch you…”
“……”
“I can’t heal you, so don’t get hurt. And don’t be sick.”
As he said that, he looked at Ho-eun, his gaze both tender and unruly. He seemed to hate the fact that Ho-eun was hurt so much it was awful.
“……”
Ho-eun stared blankly at Tae-muk. ‘I’ll cherish you,’ ‘precious.’ Those words lingered in his ears. In fact, they weren’t particularly special words to Ho-eun. He had heard them from his parents, his brothers, and even Deok-woo.
But hearing them from Tae-muk felt new. No, it was truly new. It was because he knew that the cherishing and preciousness he spoke of were different from the cherishing of his family.
After that, Tae-muk kept looking at Ho-eun’s hand. He frowned at the wound, or clicked his tongue as if he didn’t like something, but then he glanced at Ho-eun as if he was ashamed of what he had said, and then turned his gaze away as if it was nothing.
“……”
Ho-eun was staring at Tae-muk without blinking. As he did so, his appearance, that is, his handsomeness, struck him as new and great.
How could Tae-muk be so manly? His eyes were deep, but his gaze was like a beast’s, his nose was sleek and sharp, and how could his jawline be so sharp and firm?
As Ho-eun carefully admired Tae-muk’s face, he suddenly thought that he wanted to kiss him. He also wanted to hold him in his hands, touch him, and caress him. It was the first time he had ever felt such a desire.
Without realizing it, Ho-eun leaned his face towards Tae-muk. He even lifted his heels. But.
“Let’s go back now. I need to put medicine on your hand.”
Tae-muk said, releasing Ho-eun’s hand. Ho-eun was startled and quickly straightened up. His face flushed as if it had been heated in a fire. He, he was having these thoughts. Such lewd thoughts. He blinked, not knowing what to do.
Tae-muk, who was about to pick up Ho-eun, noticed his flushed face and frowned.
“Why is your face so red?”
“Oh, uh, that’s, uh, that is…, ah, my hand! My hand hurts…”
Ho-eun blurted out whatever came to mind. But Tae-muk’s face immediately became serious.
“Does it hurt that much? Let’s go quickly.”
Tae-muk suddenly hugged Ho-eun. Ho-eun was horrified and struggled to get away from him, kicking his legs. It was Tae-muk’s arms that he was hugged into every day, but suddenly he felt shy and embarrassed.
“Plea, please put me down. I’ll walk.”
At that, Tae-muk frowned and bound Ho-eun’s legs.
“What nonsense are you talking about? How are you going to walk in this snowfield? Do you want to catch a cold again and cough?”
“……Nonsense?”
“Of course. It’s nonsense, what else would it be?”
“……”
“Of course, your voice is nice to listen to, but just because you say nonsense in a nice voice doesn’t mean it becomes something else.”
Tae-muk said clearly and at length, which was unlike him. Ho-eun stared blankly at Tae-muk, and then.
“Hahahaha……”
He couldn’t help but burst into laughter. He said he would cherish him and that he was precious, but now he was saying nonsense, which was so like Tae-muk that he couldn’t help but laugh.
“Why are you laughing?”
Tae-muk raised one eyebrow as if he didn’t know why he was laughing. He wondered if Ho-eun had hurt his head without him knowing, so he examined his head. That was even funnier, and Ho-eun had to burst into laughter again.
Ho-eun’s spooning was always slow, but today it was especially slow. Tae-muk, who was sitting across from him, couldn’t stand it any longer and placed a thick piece of meat in his rice bowl.
“Eat.”
“……”
The meat marinated in soy sauce looked delicious, but it was rough and thick. It meant he had to chew a lot. Ho-eun reflexively closed his mouth tightly. Then, he felt a throbbing, stinging pain inside his lower lip. He couldn’t bring himself to touch the meat and just stared at it, so Tae-muk picked up his chopsticks again.
“Why? Don’t you like meat? Then eat bean sprouts.”
This time, he picked up bean sprouts. He only gave him two strands, so that he wouldn’t lose his appetite before he even ate them. But Ho-eun wiggled his lips this way and that, as if he was uncomfortable with something, and then slowly put down his spoon.
“I don’t want to eat anymore.”
“You’re full? Already?”
Tae-muk looked at the table with a bewildered expression. Ho-eun usually barely finished half a bowl of rice, but he had eaten at least half a bowl, but today he hadn’t even eaten that much.
Ho-eun rolled his eyes at Tae-muk’s hardened face. He was wondering whether to tell the truth or lie. Then, he thought it wasn’t right to lie to his superior, so he said in a small voice.
“That’s… my mouth hurts…”
“Your mouth hurts? Why?”
Tae-muk bent over and stared intently at Ho-eun’s mouth. But Ho-eun’s mouth was fine. It wasn’t torn or broken anywhere, and it wasn’t pale. It was just beautiful.
Tae-muk narrowed his eyes as if he didn’t know what was going on, and Ho-eun covered his mouth with his sleeve, as if he was embarrassed by his gaze, and said quietly.
“I think I have a canker sore.”
“What’s a canker sore?”
“It’s also called a mouth ulcer.”
“So, what is it?”
Annoyance crept into Tae-muk’s eyes. He knew about pain from being cut or torn, but he was completely ignorant of pain caused by illness. Thanks to Ho-eun, he was learning about new illnesses every day, and today he was going to learn about something called a canker sore.
“It’s an inflammation that occurs in the mouth, and it’s painful to chew food.”
Ho-eun said, still covering his mouth.
“You have inflammation in your mouth? Let me see.”
Tae-muk pushed the table away with one hand and pulled Ho-eun’s body in front of him. Ho-eun, who was sitting on a cushion unlike Tae-muk who was sitting on the bare floor, slid forward as if he was being served.
“……”
Instead of answering, Ho-eun shook his head. He was embarrassed to show his mouth. He also didn’t want to make a fuss about something that wasn’t a big deal.
“Open. Your mouth.”
But Tae-muk urged him with a fierce expression. He looked like he would break his jaw to open it if Ho-eun refused.
“It’s, it’s nothing…”
Ho-eun hesitated for a moment, then reluctantly opened his mouth. Tae-muk carefully grabbed Ho-eun’s cheek and examined his mouth. But he couldn’t see any inflammation. He wondered if it was under his tongue, and was about to stick his finger into his mouth when.
“Here…”
Ho-eun gently turned his lower lip inside out with his hand. Between the pink flesh, there was a white, scaly thing smaller than a pinky nail. It was a minor wound in some ways, but it seemed quite uncomfortable because it was in his mouth.
Ho-eun already didn’t enjoy eating, and now it hurt every time he chewed. It was the perfect condition to stop eating.
Tae-muk sighed through his nose and slammed the table irritably. The two bowls of soup on the table splashed at the same time. The metal spoons rattled and convulsed.
“Are you doing this on purpose?”
He glared at Ho-eun as if he was displeased.
“……Yes?”
“Why do you get sick every time I tell you not to get sick? Are you taking revenge?”
Ho-eun blinked for a moment, then burst into laughter, “Pfft.” He had no intention of taking revenge, but even if he did, would he make his own body sick? And could that even be considered revenge? It was nonsense.
But Tae-muk was serious.
“Don’t laugh. Tell me straight.”
“I’m not doing that.”
“Then why are you sick?”
“Uh… It happens when I overdo it a little, or when I’m tired, or when I don’t get enough sleep.”
Ho-eun answered, pressing down on his lower lip with his hand and then releasing it. It used to happen when he was at home if he ate a little less, or went out to see the sights with Deok-woo, or didn’t sleep well. It was a wonder that it hadn’t happened yet on the battlefield.