By Zephyria 
121
“…….”
Tae-muk looked back at Ho-eun with suspicious eyes. It was a look that said, ‘You? I don’t think you can do it.’ Ho-eun swallowed hard and looked around.
“I think I need something sharp……”
“There’s nothing like that here. Just do it.”
“W-with my hands?”
Ho-eun felt the resolve he had barely managed to hold onto crumble again. The thought of digging into that wound with his fingers already sent shivers down his spine. Tae-muk frowned at his trembling form.
“I told you to just call Byeonguk.”
“No! I, I’ll do it. I’m General’s Bondmate. I have to do it.”
Ho-eun said firmly. It was a useless sense of responsibility.
But Tae-muk didn’t stop him anymore. It wasn’t like he was asking him to do it, and there was no need to refuse when he was offering. It also seemed like the wound would heal faster if Ho-eun’s fingers dug into it.
Tae-muk silently turned his back again. Ho-eun stood close behind him.
“T-then, I’ll do it. Tell me if it hurts.”
Tae-muk chuckled at those words. What was he going to do if it hurt? Was he going to stop? It was an unfamiliar thing to hear on the battlefield, and at the same time, it was funny.
“…….”
Ho-eun swallowed hard and carefully brought his hand to the wound. And just before his fingertips touched it, he swallowed hard once more. He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again. Then, he took a deep breath and plunged his hand into the wound, holding his breath.
“Ugh……”
Ho-eun groaned, pulling at the corners of his mouth. Tae-muk’s skin was sticky, hot, slippery, and strangely firm. He couldn’t move his fingers carelessly, and even trying to spread them was difficult.
Ho-eun’s eyes were a mess. Tae-muk was the one whose wound was being dug into, but somehow he seemed to be in more pain. But.
“You need to go deeper.”
Tae-muk gave a difficult command.
“Ugh……”
Ho-eun pushed his hand deeper with a groan. His fingertips must have touched something wrong, because blood gushed out again. He gagged at the stream of blood running over his fingers.
I can’t do it. I can’t. This is something I can’t do. It’s impossible.
He was about to pull his fingers out when.
Something round and hard brushed against his fingertips. It was a completely different texture from Tae-muk’s flesh he had felt so far.
A bullet.
Ho-eun’s pupils shrank. Without realizing it, he pushed his fingers deeper into the wound. Then, with his eyebrows raised and his mouth pursed, he began to fish for the bullet.
But it wasn’t easy to get the bullet out. Every time he touched it with his fingertips, it spun around and went deeper inside. Each time, blood gushed out. By then, Tae-muk’s broad back was completely soaked in blood. It looked as if he was wearing a Durumagi made of red silk.
“…….”
Ho-eun, with beads of cold sweat on his temples, hesitated for a moment. Should he give up? But if he left it like this, the wound wouldn’t heal. Tae-muk would have to keep suffering. That wouldn’t do.
Alright, now that I’ve stirred up the wound, I have to achieve my goal.
Ho-eun gritted his teeth. Then, he pushed his fingers deeper into the wound. And finally, he was able to grab the bullet with his fingertips.
By then, his wrist was throbbing and the back of his hand was tingling. It felt like he was getting a cramp. But Ho-eun carefully pulled the bullet out.
Finally. The bullet came out of Tae-muk’s body.
It had a very different shape from the bullets Ho-eun knew. It was flat, irregularly crumpled, and glistened even though it was soaked in blood.
“Haa……”
Ho-eun let out a sigh of relief.
“Ha……”
Tae-muk also let out a languid breath. With the bullet that had been lodged between his bones and muscles gone, he felt as refreshed as if a bad tooth had been pulled. At the same time, he could feel the wound healing little by little from the inside out where the bullet had been lodged. It seemed that Ho-eun’s touch was already having an effect.
Tae-muk rotated his wounded shoulder back in a large circle, smiling faintly.
Before, he had found the wound and the healing process disgusting, but since meeting Ho-eun, he had come to look forward to it. He even had a strange desire to bleed in order to receive his healing.
Tae-muk savored the sensation for a while. Then, he pushed off the floor with his legs and turned to face Ho-eun.
“Now that you’ve done it, it’s not a big dea-, ……you.”
However, Tae-muk couldn’t finish his sentence.
“Hng……”
Ho-eun, holding the bullet, was crying with his mouth tightly shut. Judging by the fact that his small face was completely wet with tears, it seemed that he had been crying from the moment he put his hand into the wound.
“…….”
Tae-muk stared at Ho-eun’s face. Without saying a word, without even blinking, he just stared.
In his dark eyes, Ho-eun’s reddened eyelids, his tear-filled eyelashes, his pale cheeks that were now flushed, and his lips that were so red they looked like they were bleeding, were reflected one by one.
For a long time, Tae-muk watched Ho-eun with an almost obsessive gaze, muttering to himself.
“……You’re crying now.”
“Hng……, h-huh, what, what did you, hic, say?”
Ho-eun, flushed with tears, asked back, his shoulders shaking intermittently.
“It’s nothing.”
Tae-muk denied quietly. Then, he chuckled. It was only for a moment, but it was definitely a laugh.
“……Huh?”
Ho-eun frowned slightly at that. Why is he laughing? How can he laugh? He was shot. He has a hole in his back. He’s still bleeding. He even had the impious thought that he might be crazy from the pain.
Even so, tears continued to stream down his cheeks. The tears hanging from the tip of his chin fell down, plop, plop, plop. Tae-muk caught the tears that were about to fall with his palm. Even the moderately warm tears were so Ho-eun-like.
Tae-muk continued to watch Ho-eun for a while, then belatedly noticed that his hands were covered in blood. A distorted bullet was rolling around in his palm.
Tae-muk jumped up from the chair. Then, he led Ho-eun to the sink on one side of the inn room.
“Wash your hands.”
“Hng……, yes……”
Ho-eun couldn’t stop crying even as he washed his hands. Seeing the blood being washed away by the water made his heart flutter again. Ho-eun’s tears mingled with the blood flowing down the drain. Tae-muk sighed through his nose. He thought it was nice to see him cry, but he was at a loss because he was crying so much.
“Wash your face too.”
At those words, Ho-eun nodded and washed his face with cold water. But after only a couple of splashes, he started sniffling and dropping tears again. Eventually, he just burst into tears, as if he was so sad about something.
“Bend over.”
Unable to watch any longer, Tae-muk personally wiped his face. He wiped it roughly with his large hands, as if an adult was washing a child’s face. It was more like scrubbing than washing. Soon, Ho-eun’s face was red from the friction. Tae-muk stiffened, startled by the handprints that remained.
How can a man’s skin be so soft and delicate……? It felt like if he sucked on it, the skin would peel off and come into his mouth.
Tae-muk, who had pulled up one corner of his mouth, carefully wiped Ho-eun’s face with a much gentler touch than before.
After that, Ho-eun continued to sob as he watched Tae-muk throw the distorted bullet into the trash can and roughly wipe his blood-stained back with a cloth.
Ho-eun stared blankly at his hands. The texture of Tae-muk’s flesh, skin, muscles, and blood remained intact on his fingertips.
That softness. That hardness. That heat.
“Ah……”
When he recalled it, he felt nauseous. Then, suddenly, a wave of dizziness washed over him. His whole body turned cold, and his vision went black. His eyelashes twitched. Soon, his knees buckled and his body slumped down.
Just as he was about to plummet to the floor, Tae-muk, who belatedly noticed him, quickly grabbed his waist.
“You……”
“I’m okay…… I’m okay.”
Ho-eun answered something he hadn’t even been asked again. He couldn’t even open his eyes properly, but he was trying to get up somehow, so Tae-muk sat him down on the bed. And he handed him some water. His dry hands couldn’t even hold the cup properly, so he had to hold it up to his mouth for him.
Ho-eun, who was pale and haggard, swallowed the water with difficulty. Tears were still welling up in his eyes. Tae-muk frowned and then relaxed as he watched him.
“…….”
He had only thought it was nice to see Ho-eun cry, but suddenly he didn’t like it so much because he thought he might die from crying. Just how weak was his body……?
“Why are you so weak?”
Tae-muk criticized Ho-eun, but he tilted the cup to match the speed at which he was drinking.
“I’m sorry……”
Ho-eun apologized sincerely after emptying half of the water. His tear-soaked voice was damp. The voice was unnecessarily pathetic and sad, so Tae-muk couldn’t say anything else. He just kept getting annoyed, but he didn’t know why he was getting annoyed.