By Zephyria 
“……”
A long silence followed the outburst. His collarbone moved up and down with his uneven breathing. Huff, huff-. The inhales were long, and the exhales were short. It was because his breath was mixed with anger and uneven.
“You’re right.”
A dignified voice broke the hardening air.
Ki Tae-ho gazed at him with eyes like a calm lake, without a ripple.
It seemed like a will not to run away from the criticism directed at him. A determination to face the problem head-on and fulfill his responsibility.
“Under the pretense of doing what was best for you, I acted as I pleased. I never showed you kindness, and I never gave you a warm look. As a result, it became natural. I mistakenly thought you were a child who could do well on your own, so you would be okay. Someday… yes, someday, when you stand in the same position as me, I even had the absurd comfort that you would understand me.”
Ki Tae-ho paused to catch his breath, then opened his mouth again.
“I don’t expect forgiveness now. If you’re sick of even looking at my face… I understand that too.”
However-. Just as his wrinkled lips were about to move.
“Don’t be ridiculous!”
An enraged cry sharply cut off Ki Tae-ho’s words.
Ki Jae-eon’s expression was, well, hard to define.
As if the ‘desire to believe’ and the ‘desire not to believe’ were coexisting and clashing… a complex expression.
“Don’t lie, I know everything. Don’t you think I know? Father just wants me to be the me before I lost my memories-!”
Ki Jae-eon clenched his fist. His knuckles turned white with the force.
At that painful sight, Ki Tae-ho’s expression crumbled slightly.
“Jae-eon.”
The voice that called out was very cautious.
[Jae-eon]
It was a way of calling him that he had never heard before.
Ki Jae-eon unconsciously flinched and swallowed his breath. But the distance between the two remained the same. No matter how affectionately he called his name, the desolate relationship between father and son remained seemingly close yet out of reach.
“No, that’s not it. The fault is mine. You haven’t changed. You’ve always shone. And that light has changed me, us.”
Ki Tae-ho said that it was not you who had changed, but us.
“Lies…”
“It’s not a lie. Any version of you is the same to me. There has never been a time when I didn’t love you.”
“……”
“I loved you so much that I only wanted you to rise to a good position and succeed. But I realized too late that the method was wrong… and when I vowed to correct it properly, too much time had passed.”
But I couldn’t give up. Deep regret was reflected in Ki Tae-ho’s eyes.
“Because I’m your father.”
The determination not to let the years pass by foolishly was faintly evident in his voice. The moment he finished speaking, his shoulders dropped slightly. It was the face of a man who had abandoned meaningless authority and was walking the path of a true parent.
Ki Jae-eon bit his lip and held his breath.
The word ‘love’ somehow seemed to touch a deficient part of his heart.
Something unknown was filling the place that had been empty all along.
‘If Father’s words are all true, if they’re real….’
Then does that mean that all this warmth that I thought was not mine is ultimately mine, created by me?
“Jae-eon.”
“……”
“You don’t have to forgive me right away. I don’t expect that.”
“……”
“I’m not trying to put a burden on you.”
“……”
“I just don’t want you to blame yourself no matter what happens in the future, and I want you to be healthy… and live a long life….”
The end of his words trembled slightly. It was a sincerity that could not be faked.
‘Father….’
Ki Jae-eon was speechless at Ki Tae-ho’s attitude. He wanted to laugh it off as a lie like before, but strangely, the laughter that had risen to the tip of his tongue stopped in his throat.
Even when he tilted his head back and inhaled, a hot stone was stuck inside his chest and wouldn’t go down. It felt like he had swallowed lava. Something unbearably hot kept rising up and trying to flow back.
What, exactly, is this feeling?
‘Healthy… and live a long life?’
Is that really what he wants?
‘You, who always only talked about the Family….’
But ridiculously, his father’s words piled up in one corner of his heart.
Even more surprising was that the heat that had been boiling until just now was gradually cooling down on top of it.
Yes, the resentment that he had held onto for so long… unbelievably, it was starting to unravel from the edges.
A lie, this easily?
He himself was surprised by the change and paused.
“……”
Ki Jae-eon’s frozen gaze automatically turned to his father’s face.
Then he had no choice but to receive a new shock.
Because his father’s expression as he looked at him was very shaky. With that one small movement, the heart that had been denying the other person melted away. Ki Jae-eon closed and opened his eyes without a word. His distorted brow and the corners of his mouth represented his agony. Don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it so easily. He tried to hypnotize himself, but it was no use. Already, the unfamiliar energy of understanding was seeping into the cracked gaps.
Understanding. In other words, forgiveness.
His heart, which had no pride, was arbitrarily… trying to accept his father’s sincerity.
“Jae-eon.”
It was then.
“I’ve always wanted to say it. I’m sorry.”
Dad was wrong.
His eyes shook first, and his head followed.
A short breath, a tremor in his fingertips.
Without exaggeration, neatly, but clearly, his head was lowered.
It was only for a moment, but even the flow of air seemed to change slowly.
“……-.”
Ah, a foolish sound leaked out.
It was natural.
His father, Ki Tae-ho, bowed his head.
And that was… to his own son, no one else.
The great Ki Tae-ho.
“……”
Haa- The breath he barely swallowed was clearly heard in the silence.
Ki Jae-eon swallowed and looked at Ki Tae-ho. His father, who was asking for forgiveness in a low posture. It’s not a dream.
‘To me….’
Ki Jae-eon’s vision wavered for a moment. Then, something that had been crouching in his heart fell with a thud. A sense of triumph and emptiness swept over him at once, leaving behind a burning sorrow. He felt like a fool for being so easily swayed by just one apology…
But even so, a void was created in the center of his heart. Hatred, pity, understanding, anger. All the emotions piled up in layers and eventually created a new form.
Recognition.
Yes, it was recognition.
Hatred towards his family.
And yet, recognition of himself, who could not help but love them in the end.
A futile jealousy of ‘himself.’
But recognition of the achievements he had built up on his own, not someone else’s illusion.
‘What I made….’
Mine.
Ki Jae-eon slowly exhaled. His complexion, from which the confusion had disappeared, was very bright and clear.
“…I.”
The voice he uttered was firm without a tremor.
“I’m not going to live up to Father’s expectations anymore.”
“……”
“I’m going to do whatever I want. I refuse orders, instructions, and advice. I’ll eat what I want and rest as much as I want. I don’t want to live a life that meets the expectations of others anymore.”
“……”
“Don’t interfere in my life anymore. You don’t have the right.”
At his answer, Ki Tae-ho reflexively lowered his head further, but stopped at the following words.
“Instead-.”
It was a clear resonance.
“Please watch over me quietly.”
Ki Jae-eon slowly raised his head and said to his father, Ki Tae-ho, as if making a vow once again.
“I, Ki Jae-eon, will strive to be someone I am not ashamed of, putting my name on the line.”
Only after acknowledging himself could he finally grow.
Before he knew it, a faint smile was on Ki Tae-ho’s lips. There was no longer the same coercive appearance as before. It was the face of a father watching over his grown son.
“……Okay.”
“……”
“Thank you.”
With those words, the two left the room.
Ki Tae-ho looked back several times, but he didn’t bother to hold on to his departing son.
Of course, it cannot be said to be a perfect reconciliation. However, as with any parent-child fight, the relationship between the two, which had seemed to be frozen forever, will gradually thaw.
It’s still too early, but someday, flowers will surely bloom.