By Zephyria Choi Hong-seo’s head, which had been shaking as if trying to shake off a hallucination, stopped.
He gripped the edge of the sofa tightly and lifted his head.
Lee Hae-sung’s face, with his brows furrowed and his lips pressed together, looked both angry and on the verge of tears.
It was somehow different from the face that had been relentlessly pushing ‘Yoon Hye-an.’ It was an expression revealing emotional Agitation and vulnerability.
As if regretting having shown that to Yoon Hye-an even for a moment, he rubbed his jawline widely and turned his head.
Choi Hong-seo could tell he was exercising patience.
Because of Yoon Hye-an, who kept imitating Choi Hong-seo and bringing up things only Choi Hong-seo and Lee Hae-sung thought they knew… he was being torn apart. Yoon Hye-an would be continuously picking at wounds that were waiting to heal.
And he probably wouldn’t want anyone other than Choi Hong-seo touching those wounds.
Yet, Choi Hong-seo could tell he was trying to handle this rationally, using his intellect.
After a short sigh, he looked back this way, his face perfectly returned to its usual self.
“There are experts who diagnosed Mr. Yoon Hye-an’s condition as projecting himself onto information about others encountered while suffering from memory loss.”
“What… does that mean?”
“It means that Mr. Yoon Hye-an lost his memory of who he is and what kind of person he is, and assuming he then learned detailed information about Choi Hong-seo. Instead of recalling his own past, it seems he wants to replace it with information about Choi Hong-seo. — That’s what it means.”
“Ah…”
Choi Hong-seo let out a sound of admiration and lowered his gaze.
He fumbled for his teacup and wrapped both hands around it. The tea had grown lukewarm in the meantime. He didn’t intend to drink it, just to feel that lukewarm temperature.
“If Mr. Yoon Hye-an wishes, I will help him receive counseling treatment.”
The voice Choi Hong-seo had liked so much continued its explanation, calmly and professionally.
“He’s active in New York and Boston, and video consultations are possible. It would also be good to take time once or twice to visit there for physical examinations. However, the patient’s mental comfort is the priority, so we received a proposal to try counseling first.”
It was by no means a forceful tone. But he couldn’t entirely hide the impatience that he expected ‘Yoon Hye-an’ to accept.
He couldn’t see Lee Hae-sung’s face, as Choi Hong-seo was only looking down at the table.
Only the sound of a deep sigh, like a breath of relief, could be heard. He seemed to be controlling himself considerably, so as not to let ‘Yoon Hye-an’ run away.
“I understand you don’t want to go back to how things were. You must be afraid of facing a past you don’t want to confront.”
The coaxing voice continued.
“But regaining your memories doesn’t necessarily mean the current personality of Mr. Yoon Hye-an will disappear. If we systematically approach the erased memories little by little, they say there’s a much higher probability of remembering everything before and after the accident. So, it’s even more important to receive careful treatment from a skilled professional.”
He doesn’t believe in surreal or unscientific phenomena.
Even Director Kang Woo-hyun, who believed in shamanism, probably wouldn’t entertain the idea that the dead Choi Hong-seo had awakened in Yoon Hye-an’s body. That was on a different level from seeing the past and predicting the future through the eyes of a god.
Let alone Lee Hae-sung, who, far from superstitions, didn’t even have superstitions beyond his tie-related routines. His attempt to solve this problem through medicine was an extremely common-sense approach.
Stroking the surface of the teacup with his thumb, Choi Hong-seo quietly voiced the thoughts he had organized while listening to Lee Hae-sung’s story.
“You still believe I obtained information from somewhere and am imitating Choi Hong-seo with that information, right? And that if I regain my past memories, I’ll stop imitating him… that’s what you think.”
“It was the best method I could think of. I hope you understand.”
He was serious and cautious. At the same time, there was clearly an aspect of not leaving any room for choice, as if there were no options. He clearly had no intention of letting Yoon Hye-an, who obviously had detailed information about Choi Hong-seo, go free.
Choi Hong-seo squeezed the teacup so hard it felt like it might fly out of his hand, biting down hard on his lower lip. The transparent, pale green tea water rippled in the cup. Fixing his gaze on the ripples, he spoke as if exhaling.
“If I go for that counseling.”
“……”
“Will the Vice CEO trust me a little more?”
Like the tea water in his hand, Choi Hong-seo’s voice trembled.
“Of course.”
A concise, immediate reply came back.
Choi Hong-seo slowly nodded.
“Then, I’ll do that. I’ll get counseling.”
He heard footsteps approaching. His shoes stopped beyond the table.
“I will support everything. Mr. Yoon Hye-an just needs to set aside about an hour once a week for counseling with the specialist.”
He looked up, and he was faintly smiling. If this could bring him even a little peace of mind, there was no reason to refuse or resist. After all, he didn’t have the guts to give up on staying by his side.
Looking up at him standing before him, Choi Hong-seo spoke as if praying to a god.
“Instead, I have a request too.”
His expression was generous. He looked like he would grant anything.
“Until you find evidence that I obtained that information from somewhere, I hope you won’t suspect me.”
Lee Hae-sung tilted his head slightly, and Choi Hong-seo added an explanation.
“That I… am using it as leverage to demand something from the Vice CEO.”
“……”
“Until you find evidence, or until I actually demand something from the Vice CEO… I’m innocent, aren’t I?”
Your guess is correct.
It was as good as indirectly admitting that I know Choi Hong-seo, and the things between Choi Hong-seo and you.
He was aware that he had come too far to deny it completely.
But he wouldn’t be able to find evidence. It wasn’t that he had obtained information from somewhere and knew it; it was because he, whom Lee Hae-sung knew as ‘Yoon Hye-an,’ was the very person involved in that information.
“You want me not to suspect you until then. Is that all you want?”
“Yes.”
Lee Hae-sung set two conditions: the counseling would be kept secret from the company and other Ji-ins, and he would agree to receive progress reports from the doctor as a guardian.
And he also promised to keep the fact that Yoon Hye-an was receiving counseling, and the content of that counseling, confidential.
He even offered to provide a trustworthy interpreter who would be discreet about the counseling, or to translate himself if he didn’t want to disclose the content to anyone else.
“Can I think about the details slowly?”
Lee Hae-sung glanced down at Choi Hong-seo’s trembling hands clutching the teacup and nodded.
“Let’s do that.”
“Then, I’ll be going now.”
Choi Hong-seo gathered his perfume, wrapping paper, and ribbon, and stood up.
“Alright. I’ve kept the protagonist for too long. You go ahead.”
He took out a cigarette, placed it between his lips, and gestured with his chin. In moments like these, he looked somewhat roguish. He wore a fine suit, spoke and acted gentlemanly with an intellectual face, but could instantly change his demeanor and seem like a ruffian.
Moving the cigarette from his lips to his fingers, he exhaled a long plume of smoke and gazed at his profile for a moment before Choi Hong-seo walked towards the exit.
When he had walked about halfway between the sofa and the door, a dry voice came from behind him.
“Looking at Mr. Yoon Hye-an, I feel it’s unfair.”
He stopped walking and turned halfway around.
By then, Lee Hae-sung was sitting on the sofa, smoking. Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on his thighs and blew out smoke, tapping ash.
“If that child… if they had jumped from a bridge, not a building… like Mr. Yoon Hye-an.”
When he uttered the words “jumped,” his voice became agitated and unstable.
“If they had, there would have been a possibility for that child to come back to life too. I keep thinking thoughts like that.”
He withdrew his hand from the ashtray and looked up, staring directly at ‘Yoon Hye-an.’
“Why. Do you find my words cruel?”
“……”
“That child defended me, saying I was a good person, but in reality, I’m a person who only thinks of my own people, even when witnessing a miracle happen to someone else.”
It seemed to imply that he shouldn’t expect Lee Hae-sung to give up and let him go by pretending to go along with him.
Taking another deep drag of his cigarette, he asked in a husky, low voice.
“Do you also know that Hong-seo told me I was a good person?”
“……”
“That I was unconditionally a good person… Do you know how much I was comforted by that childlike, blind faith, Mr. Yoon Hye-an?”
Looking at ‘Yoon Hye-an’ again, his gaze was no longer calm. His eyes, clashing with resentment, anger, and longing, looked like those of someone heavily intoxicated.
“You are like a god, Mr. Yoon Hye-an, who knows everything about us.”
His disheveled eyes seemed to be telling him to say anything. His dry lips moved, and Choi Hong-seo managed to force out a voice.
“Even if I didn’t know that, from what I can see, Vice CEO, you seem like a good person.”
“How would Mr. Yoon Hye-an know that?”
He sneered bitterly and brought the cigarette to his lips.
“Even though you dislike me, you helped me earlier.”
“……”
Before putting the cigarette to his lips, his hand stopped. Looking up at him with tired eyes, Choi Hong-seo bowed his head and quickly left the room. Even if he wanted to comfort him, there was nothing he could do. He couldn’t be the one to shed tears in front of him, suffering like that.
The attendant, who had stepped out of the lounge after placing the gift box, bowed deeply to Choi Hong-seo. He returned the greeting and hurried his steps.
The spot on his wrist where he had directly sprayed the perfume burned as if scalded. The scent emanating from there was completely different from what he had given in the past.
But it didn’t matter. Still, at least, it was from him.
He raised his wrist, buried his nose in the scent, and blended into the loud music and lights.
■