By Zephyria 
It was a journey without a single monster in sight, perhaps thanks to the Dunmel Canyon extending to the upper reaches of the Shatun Desert, or perhaps because the winter winds of the desert were frigid, or maybe it was because all the worthy opponents had already been slain, leaving none behind.
A journey without a single monster in sight.
Four or five Sylphs, who had followed us from the Oasis out of curiosity, guided the wind currents. Thanks to them, it wasn’t hot even at the peak of midday when the sand dunes were hottest, nor was it cold during the deep nights when the sky descended like blackness.
The gait of the camels, refreshed and re-energized after resting fully at the Oasis, carried a sense of excitement.
However, I found it difficult to share in the excitement.
It was because Ruben had been taken by the mercenaries.
Whatever the reason, Ruben had been making an effort to mingle with the mercenaries these past few days. After all, granting decision-making authority to mercenaries was tantamount to entrusting them with responsibility.
Rubel is not the type to shift his responsibilities onto others. Because of this, he seemed to be putting a lot of thought into things, trying to navigate the situation.
While Hugh and Ruben mingled with the mercenaries, discussing their past lives and future plans, Marianne and Benjamin naturally fell into step beside me.
I couldn’t help but follow Ruben’s retreating back with my gaze. Marianne, who had followed my line of sight, smiled and nudged my forearm.
“You can go join them if you want. I’ll give you my blessing.”
“No, that’s alright.”
“They wouldn’t push Michael away from their group, would they?”
“I know, but…”
I swallowed, feeling awkward. I adjusted my collar with a restless hand to block the sunlight and continued,
“I’m afraid I’d just be getting in Ruben’s way.”
“You know that?”
“…Mm.”
It wasn’t the first time Rubel had been so demure and hesitant by my side.
I felt that if I were there, the child wouldn’t be able to say what they wanted to say, nor hear what they wanted to hear. I didn’t want to interfere with their work, even if it could be called work…
The clamor of the Sylphs flitting and chattering among the group felt bothersome.
Because of those Sylphs, the voices of the group members further away sounded muffled. Just as their voices didn’t reach me clearly, I figured my words wouldn’t easily reach them, which made it easier to speak.
There were so many things I hadn’t been able to ask Marianne because I hadn’t had the leisure to spend time with her separately. I decided to seize this opportunity to seek her advice on various matters.
As I pondered how to begin, Marianne suddenly asked cheerfully,
“How was the cake the other day? Was it good?”
“Mm. Yes.”
…That day was truly wonderful.
Rubel doesn’t particularly care for sweets, but he adored such beautiful food.
With some unknown skill, the cake, adorned with an abundance of sugar-coated fruits that sparkled like jewels, had incredibly soft cream, making it both delicious and visually appealing. Ruben, unable to hide his delight, buried his head against my shoulder for a long time, then, like a young bird, he pecked at the jewel-like fruits one by one.
Recalling that day, I felt a renewed sense of pride, and my Middle Dantian warmed pleasantly. If Marianne hadn’t told me beforehand, I certainly wouldn’t have remembered to prepare it.
I expressed my gratitude again, with the hope that she would continue to look out for me in the future.
“Thank you for taking care of it.”
“Oh, it’s nothing. It’s not like we’ve only just met and don’t know Michael isn’t good at romance.”
“…Ahem.”
“But I have a question I’m really curious about.”
“Yes.”
Marianne always hesitated less than others. Her eyes sparkled as she smiled slyly and suddenly asked,
“Have you really never dated before? Not even ‘before’?”
“…Yes.”
“No one you liked on your own? No one who liked Michael?”
“Yes. There wasn’t.”
It wasn’t something I needed to think about. I answered immediately, fearing it might cause unnecessary misunderstanding.
Marianne, looking at me with a puzzled expression, leaned against the camel’s neck and asked again,
“No, why?”
“Well… partly because chastity was considered a virtue.”
“Ehh.”
“But mostly because I was lacking as a person.”
“Michael?”
“Yes.”
“Michael?”
“…Yes.”
What was so puzzling about that?
Most of my acquaintances, not just myself, were in a similar situation. Of course, like my parents in my past life, many found good partners and started families. However, having shown early promise and dedicating myself to the Martial Arts Alliance, my situation was a bit different.
As Namgung Jeong-yeon, I traveled extensively for the Alliance’s affairs. I had no fixed residence and no land. Most people I met were fellow martial artists, and we were only interested in each other’s martial arts.
Also, I was quite shy around women. If I had known that men and men could love each other, as was possible with Sierren, perhaps things would have been different? No, even then, I wouldn’t have found anyone as lovely as Ruben. I slowly shook my head.
“…Perhaps.”
“…”
“…”
“No! Why do you stop talking? What is it!”
Feeling awkward, I wiped my face with my dry hand.
“…Wasn’t it to meet Ruben…”
“…Cough!”
“What?”
Benjamin, who had been quiet until then, suddenly choked and coughed excessively. I hadn’t said anything that would make him choke like that. Embarrassed, I cleared my throat a couple of times. Marianne narrowed her round eyes and glared, so I looked up at the distant sky.
“…I didn’t want to hear this kind of thing.”
“Hmm. Uh-huh!”
“Are you serious?”
I knew I had said something embarrassing. I glanced at Ruben, but he was still busy mingling with the mercenaries. It was a relief if he hadn’t heard. I smiled awkwardly and offered a sort of excuse,
“Half of it is true.”
“Half? What about the other half?”
“It was simply that all I possessed was the body I was born with and a sword. Anyone I married would surely suffer… so I didn’t really think about it. I didn’t bother thinking about it.”
“Ah, so now you have the leisure to date?”
Marianne grinned and made a coin shape with her thumb and forefinger.
Is it okay to say that?
It was satisfying that I could now offer Ruben various jewels. However, I felt that even if I hadn’t had the leisure, I would have inevitably pined for him at least once. That’s how I felt right now.
Since I just smiled without answering, Marianne asked again,
“Did the knights there not have money?”
“I… was a bit more destitute than others. Learning good Sword Arts in a harsh world, wearing un-torn clothes, and not having to worry about making a living was enough for me. Unless one was a direct descendant, it was fine not to continue the lineage, so I only heard talk of marriage a couple of times a year, during New Year’s.”
“Ughhh… I see.”
“Now, I only feel fortunate. If I had had a wife, I would never have dared to even consider it.”
She was referring to Ruben.
Marianne, who understood immediately, burst into laughter. Benjamin, who had been coughing until then, gestured, and she handed him a water bottle. Watching him drink half and spill the other half, I took back the empty bottle. Turning halfway, I took out a new water bottle from the bundle tied to the camel’s hump.
Marianne, stamping her feet, grabbed the camel’s reins and leaned back as far as she could. Her light purple eyes sparkled with delight, filled with sunlight. She asked in a tone that sounded like she was humming,
“Even after receiving a new body?”
“I only received a new body.”
That was right.
Didn’t the god himself say it? When one dies, one should become a spirit and lose their memories. He said I had entered a different body. Not that I was reborn, but that I had donned a new body.
Therefore, the me of my past life was still the complete me.
It wasn’t as if I could pick and choose the good parts and leave the bad ones behind.
“So, how old are you living as now?”
“…About… sixty?”
“Oh my! This person is truly hopeless! Not thirty, not seventeen, but sixty?”
“Cough.”
…For a moment, I had completely forgotten that I had lied to the children.
Because Marianne laughed so loudly, the people in front looked this way. Embarrassed, I waved my hand, signaling them to stop. In the midst of that, my eyes met Ruben’s, and as he gave a slight nod of greeting, I returned the gesture with a nod of my head.
Marianne, still chuckling, winked playfully and murmured,
“Still, since you’ve come to our world, please follow the laws of this continent. Protagonists in regression stories all live their lives at their own age.”
“But they… returned to their own bodies, didn’t they?”
“Ugh, I understand how you feel, but I’d like Michael to have lived as about twenty years old.”
“Why… is that?”
“Because I want my friend to be happy and at ease.”
Ah.
For various reasons, even after revealing my past life, he treated me the same as before. Because Marianne always treated me casually, I knew she wouldn’t change her attitude. Nevertheless, her voice, clearly declaring, “You are still my friend,” was comforting.
As I simply smiled contentedly, Marianne became mischievous again.
“You’re already losing your mind over Your Highness, so what’s this about sixty? You’re in the prime of your youth.”
“…That’s.”
“That’s what?”
“No, it’s not.”
Then, I remembered something I had decided to ask and, trying to act as nonchalant as possible, I casually brought it up.
“By the way, did…”
“Yes. Did what?”
“Did that guy Bill… say anything specific to Ruben… Do you know?”
“Cough!”
I don’t know why this person keeps choking.
I handed Benjamin, who was still struggling to recover, another water bottle. He groaned as he drank the water. Marianne quickly pulled down her hat, which was perched on her head, but it was clear she was trying to suppress her laughter, her shoulders shaking.
It seemed this was also something everyone knew except me. A sigh escaped me involuntarily.
“…No, what on earth…”
“Did Your Highness tell you? What did he say?”
“…He didn’t say much.”
“Quickly. What did Bill say?”
I’m the one who needs to ask, but I don’t know why he’s more anxious.
“…That I… prefer younger people… to older ones…”
“Hahahaha! Ahah! Hahahahaha! Crazy, crazy! Ah!”
“…”
“Ahah! Ah, what do I do, really!”
Fearing the people in front might hear, I quickly covered Marianne’s mouth.
As if finding the sight amusing, several Sylphs fluttered over to Ikyun. I hastily waved my other hand, shooing them away like insects.
I suddenly wondered what on earth they had been talking about amongst themselves.