By Zephyria 
It might have been because the sun set early, but the air, heavy with raindrops, was very humid and cold.
Marianne, just as she had dried our party earlier, used Magic to make the thoroughly soaked Leon and Peter fluffy and dry again. Unable to wait any longer for the Innkeeper who wasn’t coming, Giselle and John went into the kitchen. Thanks to the skilled ones who brought a magnificent meal, we ate a hearty dinner and had nothing more to do.
Usually, after arriving at an inn and finishing dinner, our party would briefly review the route for the next day before retiring to our respective rooms. However, since we had decided to stay at this inn until the rain stopped, there wasn’t much to discuss.
Ann and Peter, who had been contemplating, made eye contact, tilted their heads, and then nodded once.
“Then we’ll go take a look around to see what’s nearby. At least, we’ll feel at ease if we can confirm when the market is held in this town or if there are any open shops.”
“Alright. If anyone else wants to go out, let me know beforehand.”
“I’ll rest for now.”
“Me too. I think I’ll go in and meditate a bit.”
Everyone except for the two Mercenaries agreed to rest in their rooms. I felt an urge to run far away outside, but without an excuse, I simply kept my mouth shut. How would we spend this rainy season until the rain stopped? My cheek felt itchy for no reason, so I brushed it with my hand.
Typically, small inns assigned two people per room. Therefore, the occupants of each room were always fixed. Marianne and Hugh, Elvin and Benjamin, Leon and Nadish, Giselle and Ann, Peter and John.
And me and Ruben.
I still hadn’t decided how to wish Ruben a happy birthday. My entire being tensed at the presence approaching from behind me.
Because glass was expensive, inns like this usually used wooden windows. Most inn room windows I had encountered were typically wide open to let in sunlight or for ventilation.
But today was different. Perhaps to block the rain, the windows were tightly shut, making the interior quite dim. Two beds, one table, two wooden chairs. And one oil lamp to illuminate the darkness. Unlike me, who took off my straw hat first, Ruben lit the lamp.
The sound of a fire starter striking echoed from behind me.
Lamps that used animal oil with a wick were not commonly used in Sierren. Yet, seeing Ruben handle the fire so skillfully made my heart flutter again. In the flickering orange light, the child’s face was brightly illuminated from chin to cheek, casting deep shadows, and I watched him as if entranced.
“Haa…”
“Hm?”
“…Ah, no. It’s nothing.”
Honestly, I’m in deep. If I’m going to be crazy, I should at least do it gracefully, but here I am, losing my mind over every gesture and movement of the child like a starving mutt. My own hot sigh escaped involuntarily, making my cheeks burn.
Perhaps it was because we arrived at the inn earlier than usual, but even after finishing our meal and coming up, the time was still early. Hesitant to lie down immediately, I pulled out a chair and sat. Ruben also took off the cloth wrapped around his head and his straw hat, hanging them up before sitting in the opposite seat.
If only there had been a sofa, we could have sat side-by-side and spent time together.
Sitting facing each other with the lamp lit, a sense of obligation to say something pushed me. Hesitantly, I opened my mouth.
“Um,”
“That’s…”
Since we spoke at the same time, both our mouths closed.
As I stood there, unsure of how to handle the awkwardness, Ruben chuckled and rested his arms on the table. The child’s broad shoulders curved forward, and his lovely face drew closer, becoming a little brighter. Seeing the sweet smile reflected in his dark eyes, I struggled to suppress my own urge to smile.
The child let out another soft laugh and asked mischievously,
“Why are you so nervous?”
“…Hmm.”
Should I say no, or should I say yes?
Was I… nervous right now?
I don’t have a habit of laying out all my inner thoughts, so I was at a loss as to where to begin. Seeing my hesitation, Ruben extended his hand from the table towards me. …As if to take it. But…
Unable to take it immediately, I just watched. The child tapped the table with his fingertips as if urging me on.
Letting out a deep sigh, I finally took the child’s hand. Then, Ruben intertwined his fingers with mine, giggling. The sound of my pounding heart tormented me.
What am I doing?
Why can’t I say the easy words, “no,” and continue like this?
From outside the closed window, the pattering sound of rain drumming against the glass echoed dully. The child’s clasped hand was warm, the light illuminating the dim room flickered softly, and his dark gaze meeting mine was incredibly sweet. It felt as if we were the only two left in this quiet world.
Suppressing the turmoil within me, I remained still. Ruben asked again,
“What are you thinking?”
“…”
Should I say it, or not?
But even without speaking, my heart was laid bare. I no longer had the strength or the leisure to hide it.
Swallowing my hot breath, I forced my voice outward.
“…Tomorrow is Ruben’s birthday, and I have nothing in my hands right now…”
“Nothing?”
“…I was just thinking about that a little.”
Then, the child suppressed another laugh. He then gently shook our clasped hands. Wondering what kind of game this was, I watched as he pressed my knuckles firmly, then brought his palm back flush against mine. My breathing involuntarily quickened.
The child brought my hand to his lips.
And then, in a slightly husky voice, as if he were being spoiled, he whispered,
“What you have in your hands.”
“…Yes?”
“What you have in your hands…”
“…Not that, not that.”
“Tsk, tsk,” I tried to scold, but my voice grew hoarse and I stopped.
Would scolding fix it? It was my fault for accepting everything from the beginning and finding him so endearing. The things the child had pestered me for were usually similar. Knowing today would be the same, I asked anyway.
I wondered if things were the same now as they were before revealing my past life, and I wanted Ruben to voice what I desired. Was I blaming this child for my intention to do something I shouldn’t?
Shaking my head, I asked again.
“…Not that. What I can do…”
“…Mmm.”
I gazed intently at his thoughtful face.
Being like this was no different from watching flowers bloom. It felt like such a heart-filling happiness to suppress the stirring in my chest and watch him as if counting every single one of his eyelashes.
Then, the flower spoke to me, and I was startled.
“Then, go on a date with me.”
“…Yes? …Ah, um… But I’ll have to arrange for guards.”
“Let’s play in the room.”
“…In the room? How can that…”
“Eat meals in the room too, and play with me, just the two of us. All day long.”
Was it really such a grand thing to be a birthday present?
But since the child liked it, I supposed it was fine. Hesitating for a moment, I nodded.
After that, we spent a long time chatting about all sorts of trivial things. Ruben told me a few things I needed to do as soon as I woke up the next morning, and the more I heard, the stranger and more peculiar they sounded, making it difficult to suppress my awkward feelings.
But well, if he liked it, was there a need to object? I nodded in agreement and memorized them firmly.
Since there was a lot to do tomorrow, we decided to go to bed early.
❖ ❖ ❖
The next day.
As soon as I woke up, I went downstairs at dawn. I sat by a chair placed in a corner of the hall and was about to give the dozing attendant some silver coins to run an errand when Hugh Benson, still half-asleep, descended the stairs.
He stretched his arms high above his head and rolled his shoulders, his face still looking drowsy.
Martial artists who have reached a certain realm are no different from superhumans. They are people above people; they don’t get tired easily even without sleep or food. But could the fatigue of Hugh Benson, who had been chasing after us on horseback and constantly sparring with Leon and Nadish to scout ahead, be the same as mine?
He must have sensed me coming down and followed me, having slept well. I greeted him with an awkward feeling.
“Did you sleep well?”
“What are you doing up so early?”
His gruff greeting, as usual, made me feel relieved. I had intended to talk to him anyway, so it was good. I cleared my throat, stopping the attendant who was about to recite the menu again.
Hugh Benson still had one eyebrow raised high.
“Well… Today, Ruben wanted to eat in the room, so I came down.”
“What? Is Your Highness ill?”
“No, it’s not that.”
Feeling awkward and embarrassed for no reason, I averted my gaze.
Would I need to explain in detail that I wanted to do various things for his birthday? Beyond the inn door, which was left ajar, the rain was still falling. Perhaps due to the damp, drizzling air, every word I spoke felt muffled.
“He just… seems to want to be spoiled.”
“…Ah.”
A chilling silence fell.
I expected him to say “Alright, alright” and go back upstairs, but he just stared at me for a long time, and I stood there, staring back. Even though I knew he had just gone to prepare food, I found myself wishing the attendant would come out quickly.
I know I’m acting suspiciously. I had already confessed to Hugh that I had done something terrible to Ruben. But what could I do? When Ruben acted pitiful and cute, I wanted to give him everything he asked for.
At least, until I return to the world I once knew… Until then.
After staring at me for a while, Hugh Benson asked in a voice filled with disbelief,
“You that…”
“Yes. Please speak.”
“Alright, I’ll just speak casually. That… are you okay?”
“Hm?”
Okay with what?
Confused, I looked at him. Hugh Benson had an equally awkward and uncomfortable expression as I did.
“No… like, dating a guy or something. Is that common in your world?”
“Ah. …It wasn’t, but…”
“And you.”
…Me?
Hugh Benson didn’t finish his sentence, instead running a hand through his hair and smoothing his bangs. His sigh, exhaled afterward, was deep and profound.
“Never mind, forget it. You’re both adults, so you’ll figure it out. I won’t worry about it anymore.”
He yawned ostentatiously, revealing the hint of his Adam’s apple.
Watching his back as he turned away, I suddenly spoke what I hadn’t been able to ask because we never had time alone together.
“Um, Senior.”
“Hm?”
“Senior, why… did you wear bandages over your eyes?”