Chapter 43 – The Price of Misjudgment
After finishing his psychiatric appointment, Yoon Ki-hyun recalled the additional diagnoses added to his medical record.
Depression and anxiety disorder. It wasn’t far from what he had expected, so there was nothing to be surprised about. It was just bothersome that the number of medications he had to take had increased.
Even so, if it meant he wouldn’t have to suffer through his erratic mood swings, it was a price he was more than willing to pay.
He had been inwardly tense when the nurse told him the initial cost would be high, including the first visit, tests, and medication, but the amount wasn’t as large as he had feared.
Compared to diseases where one has to pay tens of millions of won in medication costs every month, this seemed relatively cute, which was inevitable.
No matter how he thought about it, it was a godawful disease in every sense of the word.
‘Should I go protest in front of the Ministry of Health and Welfare and ask for [Read on Read BL Novels]health insurance coverage? Though I feel like I’d content">stolen contentdie faster than the insurance would ever be applied…’
Lost in these trivial thoughts, he arrived at the university hospital, where the test results were better than expected. Having simulated the worst-case scenario in his head, he actually felt a bit anticlimactic.
When he mentioned that he had started taking psychiatric medication to treat his depression and anxiety, the professor nodded and said he would take note of it.
The next appointment was in three weeks. It was a cycle that felt both far and near.
Whenever he came to the hospital, thinking about the amount leaving his bank account made him occasionally wish the next appointment date would never come. It was a simplistic, avoidant way of thinking.
He continued to pay, stubbornly trying to survive, but looking at the receipts still left him speechless. The figures were practically telling him to stop getting treatment and just go die.
‘But if this is a disease that only affects Guides, shouldn’t the Center handle it as a workplace injury?’
The thought crossed his mind, but he quickly dismissed it. As if getting a workplace injury claim approved by the Center was easy.
Such things applied to Espers who were seriously [unauthorized Read on Read BL Novelscopy]injured or died in the line of duty inside a gate; for Guides, the criteria for recognition were so strict that he didn’t even dare try.
It was around the time he was trying to hail a taxi back to the Center, a bag full of medicine hanging from his wrist. Amidst the crowd of average-height people, Jeong Si-jun, towering above the rest, caught his eye.
‘What is that guy doing at a hospital at this hour?’
He wondered if he had come to visit an acquaintance. Knowing that Jeong Si-jun would definitely make his presence known if they locked eyes, Ki-hyun tried to quietly slip away, but Jeong Si-jun managed to spot him and strode over.
“We almost missed each other.”
What did he mean by “almost missed each other”? Yoon Ki-hyun blinked and looked up at Jeong Si-jun.
“Team Leader Jeong.”
“Yes.”
Jeong Si-jun stood there firmly, as if he had business with him. He didn’t look like stolen contentsomeone who had just happened to run into an acquaintance while visiting the hospital for his own reasons.
“…What brings you here?”
He didn’t particularly want to ask, but his lips moved first. He was, to some extent, curious why the man was here at this time.
“I came to pick you up.”
“Who?”
“Who else? You, Yoon Ki-hyun.”
“Me?”
Asking back as if talking to himself, Yoon Ki-hyun blinked. Why on earth would Jeong Si-jun come to pick him up at this hour, a time when he should definitely be at the Center unless something unusual was happening?
Searching through his memories, he recalled mentioning that he [visit our site]would visit the hospital for a brief check-up, but he had no memory of discussing a pickup.
“You, Team Leader Jeong? Why?”
“Because you told me to?”
Jeong Si-jun also tilted his head, not hiding his bewilderment. His confident posture combined with his puzzled expression made it seem as though he had indeed finished a conversation with Yoon Ki-hyun.
“I said that?”
“What, you don’t remember?”
Judging by his aggrieved tone, it didn’t seem like he was lying, but nothing came to mind. It might have been something he mentioned in passing, but he couldn’t imagine he would have easily allowed Jeong Si-jun to come and go during working hours.
“Really, I did?”
As he asked again, Jeong Si-jun’s gaze drifted downward. Even indoors, the beauty’s face was wrapped in a muffler, and his eyes were still clouded with confusion.
‘No. I can overlook it if it happened when we drank and slept together last time, but to not remember this…’
He had come here after receiving Yoon Ki-hyun’s permission. Otherwise, how could he have possibly known which hospital Yoon Ki-hyun was visiting?
He could have used illegal routes, but he didn’t want to.
Jeong Si-jun still wanted to get along with Yoon Ki-hyun. Although it was ambiguous whether he wanted to be sex partners or lovers.
Yet, the Yoon Ki-hyun he encountered at the hospital was looking at him as if he had seen something he shouldn’t have. As if such a conversation had never taken place.
“I think I just mentioned it in passing, so I don’t remember…”
Jeong Si-jun looked down at Yoon Ki-hyun, who was trailing off in an uncertain voice, and his mind grew chaotic.
‘He doesn’t seem to be lying. Does he really not remember?’
He knew that Yoon Ki-hyun’s health wasn’t great. He knew he frequently had nosebleeds, his complexion remained pale, and he took prescribed medication after meals, but he didn’t know the exact diagnosis.
All Jeong Si-jun knew was that it was non-contagious, occurred in Guides, and required expensive treatment.
‘Eh, it’s not like we’re filming a drama. He probably just let it go in one ear and out the other.’
Usually, Yoon Ki-hyun didn’t listen to him very carefully. If there was a mistake, it was that he had talked too much nonsense just to get one more word out of Yoon Ki-hyun.
Especially since he’d been acting annoying lately because it bothered him that Ki-hyun was getting closer to Seo Yi-kyung, Ki-hyun had started ignoring him almost entirely.
No matter how he thought about it, this was more realistic. More so than some sudden amnesia.
“When someone speaks, at least pretend to remember. I’m a little hurt.”
Jeong Si-jun pouted, looking into the Read on Read BL Novelswavering eyes of Yoon Ki-hyun, who was looking up at him. He still seemed to be doubting the truth of his words.
‘This is actually a bit unfair.’
Jeong Si-jun slowly looked at Yoon Ki-hyun’s small head shaking slightly. He didn’t want to get irritated while picking up a sick person.
He suggested returning to the Center in his car, repeatedly checking the man standing beside him.
Despite being bundled up against the lingering severe cold, his small frame swayed precariously, as if he might collapse from a mere touch.
‘Should I feed him more?’
The only thing he could do without worrying about Yoon Ki-hyun’s reaction was to add more delicious restaurants near the Center to his list. His heart felt heavy today as well.
Having obediently climbed into the car, Yoon Ki-hyun stared out the window before suddenly speaking.
“Team Leader Jeong.”
“Yes?”
“Don’t think it’s weird, just listen.”
“What is it?”
“…I think my memory is a bit… erratic.”
He finally managed to finish the sentence. Truthfully, it felt a bit miserable. He never thought a situation would come where he’d have to say such a thing with his own mouth.
But he couldn’t just brush it off and pretend everything was fine.
If it were once or twice, it would be one thing. But from the distant memory of Hyun Ju-ho getting grabbed by the collar, to the night he spent with Jeong Si-jun, and most recently, the conversation about Jeong Si-jun picking him up from the hospital.
He was forgetting things that were important if you thought about it, and trivial if you didn’t. To the point [visit [unauthorized copy]our site]where he felt the severity himself.
“Is it like forgetfulness?”
“I don’t know if it’s just simply forgetting… but I have no memory of it at all. You said you told me you’d pick me up today. I have no memory of the fact that we even had that conversation.”
Jeong Si-jun fell silent for a moment. It was more serious than he thought. He had assumed Ki-hyun had just ignored his words, but to think there might be a problem with his memory.
‘No. Really?’
He knew about the frequent nosebleeds and the headaches, but the possibility of a memory impairment was a shock.
Not just a blur, but a complete absence of memory…
‘Is he really okay?’
Even for someone as reckless as Jeong Si-jun, who had pushed to be the personal Guide of a sick man, this felt serious.
“Is it because of that disease? The one where the medication costs tens of millions?”
“…I don’t know.”
He couldn’t give a definitive answer to anything.
It was certain that there were gaps in his memory, but how was he supposed to know why he couldn’t remember? He wasn’t a doctor.
“I just thought you should know, Team Leader Jeong. Because we might almost miss each other again, like today…”
“…”
“I’ll make notes as much as possible and ask during the next check-up. So, don’t worry too much.”
Yoon Ki-hyun offered the best solution he could manage [unauthorized copy]right now. He simply had to take many [visit our site]notes, review them often, and fill in the potential gaps in his memory.
Jeong Si-jun, staring blankly at Yoon Ki-hyun sitting in the passenger seat with a pale face, asked.
“Exactly what kind of disease is this? Are you even in a condition to provide guiding?”
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