LMI 33

Ashley was just coming out of the kitchen.

“Already done?”

“Uh, uh-huh.”

Koi nodded hastily at Ashley’s question. He was inwardly nervous that his actions might seem awkward, but Ashley just said, “Oh?” and brushed it off.

Was he okay?

Koi didn’t trust his acting skills at all, but seeing Ashley brush it off made him think it might not have been bad. He had no choice but to think so.

“Are you going to bed right away? Or do you want to drink some more?”

“I’ll drink more.”

Going to bed already was out of the question. Ashley smiled at his hasty reply. The swelling on one cheek was still there, but the handprint had faded a lot. By tomorrow, the swelling would subside and the handprint would be completely gone.

“You’ll be able to come to school on Monday.”

Ashley chuckled at Koi’s words.

“I told you I was going.”

Seeing his matter-of-fact reaction made him feel a little mischievous. Koi pretended not to know and asked.

“Even if you’re still like this then?”

Ashley looked down at him.

“Who was it that said I’d be cool no matter what?”

Koi’s cheeks flushed.

“…Me.”

Ashley nodded as if he was right, then chuckled. As Koi hurriedly followed behind him, who was walking ahead with a relaxed gait, he felt strange with his heart pounding inside.

*

“Haaaah.”

A satisfied sigh escaped. Koi was sitting next to Ashley in the garden, looking at the night sky. Next to them were piles of various kinds of soda and snacks.

“It looks like the stars are going to pour down.”

Koi said, reaching out his hand.

“This is the first time I’ve seen such a wide sky.”

“Didn’t you see it last time too?”

Koi quickly corrected himself at Ashley’s annoying remark.

“I can only see such a wide sky at this mansion.”

The power lines hanging from the utility poles didn’t cut across the sky, and it wasn’t jaggedly fragmented by the occasional rising buildings. The endlessly wide sky seemed to clear his chest every time he saw it.

“It’d be easy to see the constellations.”

Koi said, drinking his soda.

“Do you want to see them?”

At Ashley’s question, Koi turned his head and stared at him.

“Is there another way to see them besides this?”

Ashley muttered in an indifferent tone.

“I do have a telescope.”

“What? A telescope? A celestial telescope?”

Ashley, who had flinched and stepped back at the raised voice, replied a beat later.

“Um, well.”

“Amazing! Where? Where is it? Second floor? Third floor? Where is it? Can we see it now?”

Koi, who had shouted with a delighted expression, suddenly paused.

“Sorry, I got too excited.”

Seeing Koi, who had been so lively, suddenly deflate, Ashley chuckled. The ears that had been moving so quickly soon became still. Ashley suppressed the urge to touch those ears and said.

“It’s not here, it’s at the Eastern main house.”

“Ah…”

Koi’s voice, which had been high with excitement, died down. Ashley cleared his throat and asked.

“Do you like stars that much?”

“Yeah,” Koi nodded.

“I wish I could go to the astronomy department. I want to work at NASA.”

“NASA?”

“Yeah.”

Koi’s mood quickly changed and he said excitedly.

“I want to be an astronaut.”

“An astronaut?”

Ashley repeated his words again. Koi nodded again.

“I want to experience that universe firsthand. How great would that be? A pitch-black universe that goes on forever. Way over there, so far away, so incredibly…”

He stretched out his arm as he spoke. Koi already felt like he was in the middle of the universe. The navy-blue sky surrounding him felt like the universe. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Cold air filled his lungs. Koi felt like he was sinking into the universe.

“…Koi!”

Suddenly, Ashley called his name and grabbed his arm. Koi was startled and looked at him, opening his eyes that had been closed until then.

“Ash?”

Koi called him, bewildered. Ashley’s face was pale, without a trace of color. Surprised by the unexpected situation, Koi blinked and carefully opened his mouth.

“Ash, what’s wrong?”

Ashley, who had been staring at him with a pale face, blinked as if he had belatedly come to his senses.

“…Huh, uh?”

Koi was even more worried by his somewhat dazed reaction.

“Ash, what’s wrong?”

Only when he called him again did the tension ease from Ashley’s face, and a deep sigh escaped.

“Sorry, I was a little surprised.”

“Why?”

Koi asked again, still not understanding. Ashley opened his mouth and then closed it again.

“…No.”

Ashley said in a whisper.

“No, nothing. I’m sorry.”

Koi wanted to know the reason, but Ashley didn’t seem like he was going to tell him. All he could do was look at Ashley with concern.

“…Are you okay?”

Koi asked, seeing that some color had returned to his face. “Yeah,” Ashley nodded.

“I’m okay, now.”

Ashley smiled. But it wasn’t his usual refreshing smile. Koi tried to change his mood by making a light joke.

“Did you think I was going to go somewhere by myself?”

He even laughed out loud, but Ashley didn’t laugh. He didn’t turn away, embarrassed. He just stared intently at his face.

Ash…?

Koi waited silently, puzzled. The surroundings were silent. He couldn’t even hear his own breathing.

…Huh?

Ashley tilted his head towards him. A faint sound mixed into his ears, which had been endlessly quiet. It was the sound of his heart pounding and racing.

Koi stared at Ashley, who was approaching, with wide eyes. The heart that had been fluttering until now seemed to have become somewhat dull. All his senses were moving only towards Ashley. His eyes looking at him, his ears listening to his voice, every single hair on his body stood on end, keenly sensing his actions.

Koi held his breath. He couldn’t predict what Ashley was going to do at all. He was just watching him get closer.

The time, which was only a few seconds, felt endlessly long to him. He watched him with a quietly pounding heart. When he felt that Ashley’s eyelashes were particularly long and dark.

“Got it.”

Huh?

Koi blinked in surprise at Ashley’s sudden voice. A smile appeared on Ashley’s neat face that came into view, and he raised one hand.

“There was a bug.”

“A b-bug?”

Ashley readily nodded at his stammering question like an idiot. He got up from his seat with one hand clenched and asked.

“Do you want some ice cream?”

“Huh? Uh.”

Koi, who had been blank until then, nodded absentmindedly. Ashley smiled and then turned around and strode away.

Koi sat there, just staring at Ashley’s retreating figure. Listening to the sound of his heart pounding urgently, louder than ever, Koi thought.

I thought he was going to kiss me.

His face flushed hotly belatedly.

*

That was close.

Only after he had moved far enough away that Koi couldn’t see him did Ashley stop walking and stroke his chest. Why did I do that? No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn’t understand. Because the wind was so nice, because the dark sky was clear and bright, and because Koi, who was sitting next to him, Koi was.

It felt like he was going to leave far away.

“Haaa.”

He closed his eyes and let out a trembling sigh. Really, how stupid. Even if you’re lost in delusions, there’s a limit, how pathetic.

Ashley moved his rough steps towards the snack bar. While taking out ice cream and drinks from the refrigerator as he reached for them, he tried to find the cause of the unfortunate incident that had just happened.

It’s not like I’m a kid having my first love.

After slamming the refrigerator door shut, he turned around.

*

After taking a deep breath, Ashley walked towards the garden where Koi was. Koi was looking at the night sky with his legs folded and hugged. Ashley readily sat next to him and handed him the ice cream.

“Thank you.”

Koi took the spoon attached to the lid and put the ice cream in his mouth. The cold and sweet vanilla flavor spread throughout his mouth.

Delicious.

He couldn’t help but smile brightly, unable to control his naturally opening mouth. Ashley glanced at him and then turned his head away.

He had opened a can and poured about half of it into a glass, but he realized that he had brought the wrong one just as he was about to put the drink in his mouth. He thought it was root beer, but he had brought the Beer next to it. He put down the glass with the pungent alcoholic scent and looked for another drink.

He looked down at the cola he grabbed and was about to drink it, when he suddenly saw Koi gulping something down.

“Wa, wait a minute!”

Ashley, realizing that it was the Beer he had been about to drink, hurriedly tried to stop him, but he had already emptied the entire can.