By Zephyria 
“Yes…” With Haon’s faint reply, the conversation ended.
No words were exchanged between them as they entered the elevator, passed through the inner door, and walked down the hallway toward the entrance. Haon merely fidgeted with his mask, stealing glances at In-ho to gauge his mood.
“Get some rest. Call me if you need anything.”
In-ho, who had been walking a step ahead of Haon, paused briefly before the stairs. He turned his head slightly to look back at Haon.
“I’ll give you a new phone tomorrow. I ordered a few, so you can pick one from those.”
He didn’t just order one, but several.
A refusal almost leaped from Haon’s lips, but he swallowed it down. He didn’t want to upset In-ho any further.
“Yes, thank you.”
Haon gave a small bow, glancing at In-ho’s expression, which was more subdued than usual. Though he had no desire for a new phone, he pretended to be sincerely grateful.
“I’ll put it to good use.”
“…Alright.”
In-ho looked at Haon, who was bowing deeply, and then headed up the stairs.
The sound of fabric slippers brushing against the smooth floor continued. Hearing that sound, Haon slowly raised his head, his face clouded with deep anxiety.
Following the retreating figure of In-ho, Haon slowly made his way to his room. His legs moved heavily, slower than usual. He swallowed a sigh, resentful of his own slow body, which mirrored his stifling personality.
“Haon-ssi.”
As he took a heavy step, he quickly turned around at the sound of In-ho’s voice calling from a distance. In-ho had stopped halfway up the stairs and was looking at him. He wondered how long he had been standing there.
“Goodnight.”
In-ho offered a brief nighttime greeting, meeting Haon’s widened eyes. He didn’t add anything more after that.
“Yes… sleep well.”
Haon murmured toward In-ho’s back as he moved away again. Even after the sound faded, Haon continued to part his dry lips, staring up at the distant stairs.
Without even knowing what he wanted to say, he remained frozen in place until In-ho vanished from sight.
* * *
For the first time, Haon tossed and turned all night. It was the first time he hadn’t been able to sleep since staying at In-ho’s house. He wasn’t sensitive to his sleeping environment and usually fell fast asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. However, despite his efforts to sleep throughout the dawn, a chain of endless thoughts chased sleep away.
“Haa—.”
The sun was already rising outside the window. Giving up on sleep entirely, he got out of bed and trudged into the bathroom. He didn’t think sleep would come even if he stayed in bed all day. It was a problem, as he needed at least a little sleep to be able to work.
Swoosh—.
Believing he still had some time before his commute since the sun had just risen, he filled the bathtub with hot water. Because the phone—the only thing serving as a clock in In-ho’s house—was broken, he had no way of knowing the exact time.
Sitting in the spacious tub, Haon adjusted the temperature of the water that reached up to his navel and slightly spread his legs. While the pain had decreased since yesterday, the area below was still slightly uncomfortable when he sat.
“It’s quite swollen…”
Touching the slightly plumped area below, he leaned his face against one knee. He spread the wrinkled flesh and inserted his fingertips slightly into the narrow opening. As expected, the inside was also swollen.
After withdrawing his hand, he closed his legs again. He hugged his knees and buried his gloomy face against them. He felt a bit upset. No, quite a lot.
The fact that he had caused In-ho trouble by not bringing his phone, his timid personality that made In-ho frustrated, and the gaps in his memory regarding the night he spent with In-ho weighed heavily on his heart.
He had always thought it was a relief not to remember spending a heat with an Alpha. But now, he resented himself for not remembering the moment he was held by the person he liked. It felt miserable to imagine the sex with In-ho only through the lingering pain in his body.
To Haon, sex had always been an unfamiliar and frightening act. Whenever he was held by an Alpha while sober after the heat’s fever had subsided, he only ever felt negative emotions. Whenever an Alpha held onto him, he wanted nothing more than to run away. Even if he smiled, he would beg and plead internally to be let go.
Had it been the same when he was held by him?
He splashed his feet in the hot water and wiped his face. He felt pathetic for having such gloomy thoughts while using hot water in such a luxurious bathtub.
After soaking in depression for a while, Haon shook his head. Fearing that he might let his gloom show in front of In-ho, he forced the corners of his mouth upward. He didn’t want In-ho to dislike him any more than he already might.
‘Don’t show that you like him in front of that man.’
While practicing his smile, a conversation he had with Tae-hwi hyung suddenly came to mind.
‘I’m telling you this for your own sake. Don’t give him too much of your heart; just like him moderately.’
‘Why…?’
The moment he chewed over that conversation, the gently curved corners of his mouth slowly dropped.
‘You’re asking because you really don’t know?’
As if answering Tae-hwi’s following question, Haon gave a small shake of his head. Haon knew. He knew that he must not reveal his feelings to In-ho.
The emotions he felt would undoubtedly make In-ho uncomfortable. In-ho had clearly stated from the beginning that he did not date Omegas.
He must have been drawing a line.
If he tried to cross the line In-ho had drawn out of consideration, he might be kicked out of the house. It would naturally be awkward for In-ho to live alone with an Omega who liked him.
He bolted up from the tub and turned on the cold water. He cooled himself down and moved his facial muscles to create a more natural smile.
He wanted to stay at In-ho’s house for the remaining year and a half. He hoped to fulfill the duration they had agreed upon.
“Ah…”
While scratching his head vigorously, some shampoo water got into his eyes. As he forced his stinging eyes open to rinse them with water, a sudden thought occurred to him.
Since he was stupider than anyone else, perhaps if he ignored these fluttering emotions, he might eventually forget them.
* * *
After showering, he felt thirsty. Haon opened his room door, roughly shaking his wet hair. Since it was early morning, he naturally assumed In-ho would still be asleep.
“You woke up early.”
However, In-ho’s voice pierced through to Haon, who had been walking while looking at the floor. Startled by the unexpected voice, Haon froze on the spot.
In-ho was in the kitchen, drinking sparkling water from a blue bottle. It was a drink he enjoyed as much as water. Seeing him drenched in sweat, it seemed he had just finished working out and come downstairs.
“Did you shower?”
“Yes…”
As he awkwardly replied, he realized his stiff expression and quickly forced a smile. Seeing Haon suddenly smile brightly, In-ho forgot what he was about to say, closed his mouth for a moment, and set the blue bottle down.
An awkward silence descended along with the sound of the glass bottle hitting the marble.
The eyes of the two, possessing different hues, merely wandered through the air. Without looking at each other, Haon and In-ho stared at the empty living room and the hazy view outside the window.
“You should dry your hair.”
In the end, it was In-ho who broke the silence again.
“You’ll catch a cold if you don’t.”
“Ah… yes, I’ll dry it and come back out.”
Hearing In-ho’s words, Haon immediately returned to his room. He preferred air-drying, but since In-ho told him to dry it, he took out the hair dryer he rarely used.
Vrrr—, he quickly dried his hair with the uniquely shaped dryer. Thanks to his thin hair, the moisture disappeared quickly.
Haon combed his hair neatly and tidied up his face, applying the lotion he had almost forgotten.
When he lived in the countryside, he rarely used the lotions lying around the house. But since this was the house of In-ho, whom he liked, he felt he should take good care of his appearance.
While smiling brightly in the mirror, he became mindful of the bruise on his cheek and pulled his hair forward. Because his hair was short, it was difficult to cover his face no matter what he did.
Knock, knock.
Just then, In-ho knocked on Haon’s door and entered carrying a small tray. Because Haon had rushed back in, the door was already open.
“I thought you might be thirsty.”
In-ho had brought warm tea and a small bowl of thin rice porridge. He stood quietly in front of the TV, waiting for Haon’s reaction as if asking if he could come further in.
“Please come in.”
Haon welcomed In-ho with a thank you. Seeing In-ho’s gentle smile, his heavy heart began to lighten slightly.
“Sit on the bed and drink.”
When In-ho placed the tray on the nightstand next to the bed, Haon sat in the spot he pointed to without a word. Since he had been thirsty, the warm tea went down smoothly.
“Thank you.”
After moistening his throat with the fragrant tea, he fidgeted with the handle of the teacup. While Haon drank the tea, In-ho simply stood before him. With an expression that suggested he had something to say.
“Haon-ssi, yesterday—.”
“Cough!”
Just as In-ho was about to speak, a cough erupted from Haon’s damp throat. It was because he had inhaled the wrong way.
“P-please, cough. Continue, cough.”
Having properly choked, the coughing wouldn’t stop easily. In-ho sat beside Haon and rubbed his heaving back.
“Shall I bring some lukewarm water?”
“No, I’m okay now…”
Fortunately, Haon’s coughing subsided quickly, and his voice trailed off. It was because he remembered the last thing In-ho had said last night.
‘Stop saying you’re okay.’
He told me not to say I’m okay.
“The tea has cooled down just enough, so you can drink this.”
At In-ho’s words, Haon forced a smile and slowly swallowed the fragrant tea. It was hard to look In-ho in the eye, so his gaze kept sinking toward the floor.
I want to see him. But if I look at In-ho now, I feel like I’ll remember his face as he sighed in the car.
Last night, In-ho had a frustrated look on his face. At the slight furrow of his one eyebrow, Haon felt as if his own heart was being crumpled. It was the first time he had seen In-ho make such a face.
“Haon-ssi.”
He shifted his eyes slightly at the soft voice calling his name. Anxiety was evident in Haon’s hand as he toyed with the teacup.
“Sometimes, I speak a bit bluntly.”
In-ho took the teacup from Haon’s hand and rubbed his forehead with the other. As if the topic were unfamiliar, his words didn’t flow fluently.
“Only occasionally. Only when I’m in a bad mood. Even when I don’t want to, there are times when the words just come out harshly.”
In-ho’s sincerity was felt between the slowly broken sentences. Haon pricked up his ears and focused on the words being delivered.
“I didn’t say anything because I was afraid I might be like that in front of you. It wasn’t because I was angry.”
Haon didn’t want to miss even the small sound of his breath.
“I’m sorry. For making you uncomfortable.”
Haon’s mood, which had been rolling on the floor all night, began to slowly soar toward the ceiling. Haon swallowed hard, trying to suppress the feeling of flying.
“Ah, no…”
Reacting a beat late, Haon shook his head along with his hand.
“It was because of me that your mood soured, so you don’t have to apologize.”
He wanted to say, ‘I’m the one who’s more sorry,’ but since In-ho had forbidden apologies, he couldn’t. Haon simply did his best to decline the apology.
“That’s true. I was upset because of you, Haon-ssi.”
In-ho, who had placed the teacup back on the tray, spoke honestly. His characteristic languid smile lingered on his lips.
“I was quite hurt that I was forgotten by you.”
I spent the whole day worrying only about you, Haon-ssi.
The following words, spoken like a joke, did not sound light at all. Haon read the sincerity within the words hidden by the smile. In truth, he hoped it was sincere.
“I won’t forget now.”
Haon vowed, gripping the bowl of porridge In-ho handed him after the tea. Unlike In-ho’s lightly smiling expression, Haon was very serious.
“I’ll absolutely never forget. I promise.”
It was a vow he couldn’t be certain he could keep, but he impulsively made a solemn oath to In-ho.
“I’ll remember everything. Everything you say, In-ho-ssi.”
On this day, for the first time in his life, Haon made a promise he could not keep.