DD 8.1 Breathtaking Sound

Breathtaking Sound

Gallery Phantom.

Among the galleries scattered throughout Samcheong-dong, this place is particularly recognized for its ability to discover new talent.

If a promising artist signed an exclusive contract with Phantom, which was said to have a knack for recognizing them, success was practically guaranteed not only in the domestic market but also in the overseas market. ―Such rumors circulated not only among established artists but also among students majoring in art who dreamed of becoming full-time painters.

Young, ambitious artists who pursued experimental and unique works and wanted to be recognized for them visited Phantom directly with their portfolios several times a week.

They first had to go through an interview with Manager Han. Afterward, some of those whom Manager Han deemed suitable were sent to CEO Ryu, Lau Wikun.

‘I heard that Seo Yi-hyun was also discovered at this Phantom.’

And six or seven out of ten of them invariably brought up the name of Seo Yi-hyun.

And each time, Lau’s hand, which was passing over the portfolio, had to pause.

Pretending not to be surprised, pretending that his heart wasn’t sinking at the name, he tried to appear calm and asked.

‘Is the fact that we discovered Seo Yi-hyun the reason you want to sign with us?’

‘He’s a fairly successful artist in our generation. I’m not interested in recognition from the mainstream market, but I don’t want to be ignored either. If I’m going to do work that’s divisive anyway, I’d rather be hated for sure and loved for sure. He’s practically a role model for people like me.’

The artist Seo Yi-hyun was growing so much that his name had to be heard even in such a distant place. Not by Lau Wikun’s side.

‘But of course, I’ll be different from Seo Yi-hyun.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Even if I receive a better offer from somewhere else before the contract period, I will never betray Phantom.’

Occasionally, some people added such words.

The type of people who believed that Seo Yi-hyun, who was just a fledgling artist, had received an offer to join ‘The Hands,’ a Paris-based art foundation, and betrayed ‘Phantom,’ which had discovered him, and left for ‘The Hands.’

There was no artist who brought a good portfolio among those who blindly believed and mentioned such rumors. There was no need to feel sorry for rejecting them. It was fortunate.

Lau closed the portfolio and explained to them each time.

‘Seo Yi-hyun did not betray Phantom. It was just a decision made after mutual consultation because we judged it to be a very good opportunity for him. He was not our business tool, but our friend.’

After they left with a look of having made a mistake, he invariably wanted to smoke. Sometimes, he felt very ferocious. It was anger at himself.

Even if it wasn’t for ‘Changing,’ Seo Yi-hyun should have gone to ‘The Hands.’ It was too good an opportunity for Lee Hyun as an artist, and he would grow much more with the experience there. He couldn’t tell him to give up such an opportunity. That’s not love.

And perhaps if it hadn’t been for ‘Changing,’ Lau himself would have abandoned Phantom for Lee Hyun and gone to Paris with him. The expression ‘abandon’ might sound extreme, but he would have done so without any hesitation. That was the truth.

But following Lee Hyun was not allowed.

Because of the terrible sin he had committed against him himself.

He is only staying here because he was not allowed.

There was no other reason or purpose.

In the castle called ‘Phantom’ that he had built with his own hands, Lau was floating like a faint ‘phantom.’

This is the story of Lau Wikun at that time.

■ ■ ■

The group exhibition of artists affiliated with the fall season was one of Phantom’s annual events.

And prior to the main exhibition, a pre-opening event was held for VIP customers. As a result, the lights at Phantom were on until late.

Only a smaller number of VIPs are invited to the after-party that follows the event. Having maintained ties with Phantom for a long time, some of them had developed relationships closer to acquaintances or friends than customers. Therefore, the after-party always flowed pleasantly like a lively social gathering.

That day, too, only about ten VIPs remained until the end.

They had a good time mingling with Phantom staff at a table set up in the second-floor hall. Plenty of drinks and food were prepared, and a professional DJ was hired to play music that suited the atmosphere.

Lau, who was also present, was pulled away from the group at the request of one of the customers and was slowly looking around and introducing the works.

“How about this piece? I see this artist often these days.”

The man, who was about the same age as Lau, was a new customer who had formed a relationship through the introduction of an existing VIP. Although still young, he was a big spender who had already bought dozens of pieces in less than half a year.

“This is an artist named Jin Jaeyeon, who received a very good response at this year’s Hong Kong art fair. All the works exhibited at that time were sold out. It seems like it would go well with the collection that Jeongmin has.”

“I think this artist is probably an Omega….”

“Yes…. That’s right.”

What does the gender of the work and the artist have to do with each other? It was an uncomfortable question, but he couldn’t not answer.

“I’m sure the CEO has met the artist, right?”

“Well… yes. She’s our affiliated artist.”

“I heard that I used to like drawing quite a bit when I was young. I should have kept drawing. Then maybe I could have become an artist affiliated with Phantom….”

The man, who trailed off at the end of his sentence, glanced at Lau once and brought the champagne glass to his lips.

This man, who was conveying his favor to Lau, was also an Omega. It was certain unless Lau’s Pheromone nervous system had broken down. And probably a Golden Omega.

The man was keeping other Omegas around Lau in check. Even though they were not related at all.

Lau was not so naive as to not know the intentions behind the man’s words and actions.

And he was experienced enough to naturally pretend not to know, even though he knew everything.

“I also heard that I had some talent for drawing when I was young…. After meeting many painters while doing this job, I realized that it’s not something that can be achieved that easily. It’s an area where overwhelming geniuses are active. It’s a great pleasure just to be able to help and appreciate their work from the closest distance. Would you like to see another work by Jin Jaeyeon?”

The man did not hide his disappointment at Lau’s attitude of pretending not to know and moving on. And he didn’t back down.

“If I buy that painting from earlier, will the CEO bring it to me in person?”

“Haha…. Kwon Juhan usually handles the delivery.”

“Hmm… then what if I buy three pieces?”

“…….”

Lau stopped walking and turned to look at the man.

The Golden Omega, who had grown up without lacking anything, expressed his favor toward Lau more clearly than before. It was a clear expression and look of seduction.

Bending over, Lau lowered his voice.

“I’m not a host.”

No matter how VIP a customer was, Lau did not act subserviently.

Basically, he responded politely and courteously, but there was no need to grovel to sell paintings. If you have good artists and good works, flattery is unnecessary. ―That was the operating philosophy that had been maintained since Phantom opened.

Moreover, there were quite a few people who maintained their VIP customer status at Phantom in order to build a relationship with Lau Wikun, who came from a Hong Kong art tycoon family that exerted a unique influence on the Eastern and Western art scenes. In the first place, there was no need for him to be subservient to them.

However, the man was not intimidated by Lau’s quiet pressure.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.”

“It’s an insult to me, but it’s also an insult to the work. If you’re trying to buy the work with that intention, I’ll have to decline. There are plenty of customers who want to own our artists’ works.”

“Don’t get so angry. It was just a joke. I was short-sighted.”

The man kept smiling brightly at Lau, who was getting angry. Lau took a step to the side, avoiding the man’s hand that was trying to grab his arm, and instead put his hand on the man’s shoulder.

“And keep your Pheromones to yourself. Anyway, they won’t pass through my receptors at that level.”

The smile finally disappeared from the man’s face as he watched Lau, who was walking toward the painting.

Would those two look peaceful if viewed from a distance? A middle-aged woman, one of the lively group left at the table, looked at them with a satisfied expression.

“Those two look so good together. It’s nice to see.”

The woman with a large white brooch on her chest was a long-time VIP of Phantom and an ardent fan of Lau’s mother, Suki Kim.

“Does CEO Ryu seem to be doing better now?”

“I know, right? He was not himself for a while, even though he used to be so healthy.”

“No. His face is still rough. He’s thinner than before.”

Some agreed with her words, while others denied them. The woman with the white brooch shook her head while watching Lau.

“Compare him to when he came back from New York. He was like a ghost back then. Right, Manager Han?”

At the sound of her voice calling him, Manager Han finally turned around and looked at Lau inside the exhibition hall.

It was earlier this year that Lau, who had been holed up in the New York apartment that had been renovated to live with Lee Hyun, returned to Seoul.

At the time, he was literally a wreck. Everyone around him was so surprised that they couldn’t even ask him anything.

Lau judged that he was not in a state to appear in front of customers. Manager Han agreed with that. In any case, Lau Wikun was the symbol of Phantom. Not only his background but also his dignified and beautiful appearance had an effect on appealing to customers that could not be ignored.

Lau was able to show his face to customers only after staying out of sight for about a month.

To the long-time VIP customers who were worried, he made the excuse that he had a lot of troublesome things to deal with because the opening of the New York branch had fallen through, and he was busy resolving them.

After returning, he seemed to be focusing on work normally. He often stared blankly out the window, and the number of times he socialized with people noticeably decreased, but he no longer looked like a wreck. He seemed to be gradually recovering his past life. At least, that’s how it looked on the surface.

The same was true of his current appearance of attending to customers.

Judging from his somewhat stiff expression and rigid attitude, Lau seemed to be aware of the other person’s favor toward him and was clearly showing his intention to refuse. In the eyes of Manager Han, who had known Lau for a long time, it did not seem like they were getting along at all. The VIP customers’ hopes were likely to end as just hopes.

Other than that, he could no longer be seen as unstable or so immersed in his own world that he was unable to function in society.

Manager Han turned back to the group and nodded.

“That’s right. When he first came back from New York…. I was really surprised at that time.”

“Right? I don’t know how much weight he lost. I almost didn’t recognize him at first.”

The woman with the white brooch looked triumphant after receiving Manager Han’s agreement. A man with horn-rimmed glasses, another VIP customer, grumbled jokingly.

“But even when he was so haggard, CEO Ryu was still just handsome. The world is so unfair.”

Laughter of agreement erupted from here and there.

Pretending to drink champagne, Manager Han looked at Lau more closely.

As the customers said, he seemed to be doing better. He seemed like someone who had completely shaken off the shadow he had been wearing so heavily when he returned from New York.

Has he really decided to forget Seo Yi-hyun now?

That didn’t seem likely.

Lau’s longing for Seo Yi-hyun was more than just rational excitement or attraction, or sexual impulse caused by Pheromones.

He loved Seo Yi-hyun’s world of work, was the most ardent fan of that world, and almost yearned for Seo Yi-hyun as a human being.

He was clearly impressed by Lee Hyun’s gentleness and the strong will that was quietly rooted within him, and his persistence in trying to rise above his wounds. He was fascinated by the inner beauty of the human Lee Hyun.

Such love cannot be washed away. It cannot be replaced by anyone else.

It was not that he happened to fall in love with someone next to him, but that he fell in love because it was that person.

“Manager Han, does CEO Ryu really not have anyone he’s seeing?”

The woman with the white brooch lowered her voice secretly and asked. Manager Han only responded with an ambiguous smile.

“Haha…. I don’t think so, but who knows what’s going on inside him?”

“The people around him won’t leave him alone, but I’ve never heard him say he’s seeing anyone. Look over there, Jeongmin is hitting on CEO Ryu right now. Am I right?”

When the woman with the white brooch nudged him, the person next to her also looked at Lau and nodded.

“Of course, anyone can see he’s hitting on him. Otherwise, why would Jeongmin be buying so many paintings?”

“Don’t say things like that. He must have bought them because he liked the works.”

Manager Han reacted somewhat firmly, as the conversation seemed to be flowing in a strange direction. Strange rumors were bound to arise in such a setting.

Jeongmin is hitting on Phantom’s CEO Ryu, CEO Ryu doesn’t seem to dislike it, the two are dating, Jeongmin went to CEO Ryu’s family home to greet them…. It was only a matter of time before the rumors swelled like that.

“Or maybe CEO Ryu has someone hidden overseas?”

This time, the man with the horn-rimmed glasses stepped forward. The private life of a Golden Alpha with a good appearance and a great background was bound to be of interest to people in society.

“It doesn’t make sense that someone so handsome doesn’t have a partner. There are no rumors that he’s seeing anyone. Then it must be someone overseas. And you know what…. I saw CEO Ryu at the airport a while ago.”

“At the airport?”

This time, Manager Han showed interest first. He shared all of Lau’s important schedules, even for work, but he had never heard that he had recently traveled overseas.

“Was it two weeks ago? Was it two weeks ago that I went to Hawaii?”

“That’s right. I remember because it was the day our child returned home.”

“Yes, that day. Two weeks ago on the weekend. I saw CEO Ryu at the airport.”

The man with the horn-rimmed glasses, who had confirmed his departure date with his acquaintance next to him, made a fuss as people’s attention focused on him.

“I was going to say hello because I was happy to see him, but he hurried into the gate. When I looked, his destination was Paris?”

“…….”

Manager Han, who had emptied the champagne left in his glass, turned to look at Lau.

If it was two weeks ago, it was when he had tried to drag him out of the house to play tennis with Choi In-woo and the three of them. Lau had clearly refused with a look of annoyance.

‘What kind of tennis is it with three people, not four? I’m too tired these days. I’m going to sleep at home all weekend.’

And yet, a flight to Paris….

He wouldn’t have gone to spend time with Lee Hyun. If the two had decided to be together again, there was no reason to keep it a secret.

But if he had boarded a flight to Paris for another reason, there was no need to keep it a secret either. Lau always informed them of long-distance travel in advance in case of an emergency at Phantom.

What is it? Why is that man making so many secrets these days?

“CEO Ryu, Jeongmin! Stop it and come here! Let’s mingle together!”

The woman with the white brooch waved her hand greatly, calling the two people. Lau, who turned to look this way, smiled softly and moved his steps closer.

“Is there enough champagne? Should I ask them to bring more?”

People urgently stopped Lau, who was about to call a waiting staff member on a business trip.

“We’ve already drunk a lot. How much more are you going to get us drunk?”

“There’s still some left in the ice bucket, CEO Ryu.”

“Okay, you two have a drink too.”

The woman with the white brooch took the lead and filled the glasses of Lau and the man named Jeongmin.

“What were you two talking about so seriously?”

“I’m increasing my collection these days. I asked the CEO for some advice.”

Judging from Lau’s attitude, it was clear that he had rejected the man’s favor, but Jeongmin was not at all discouraged.

Manager Han glanced at Lau’s expression. He first took a seat opposite Jeongmin, not next to him. He must have been trying to keep his distance on purpose. Moreover, he was not showing interest in Jeongmin’s conversation and was taking care of other customers. Without being particularly cold, just naturally like water flowing.

Receiving favors was as common as eating for Rau. So, he couldn’t help but become an expert in refusing them.

“Oh, speaking of which, Seo Yi-hyun has released a new work.”

It happened in an instant.

“Oh my! Are you alright, CEO Ryu?”

“Ah… I’m fine. Did I startle you?”

Someone unexpectedly brought up the name Seo Yi-hyun, and it paralyzed Lau Wikun. He had just raised his glass from the table and knocked it over with a clumsy gesture. It was a rare mistake for him.

“Oh dear, your thigh is all wet!”

“I have a spare set in my office. Don’t worry.”

Lau, who had been shaken by the name Seo Yi-hyun, reassured everyone with his usual smile. He roughly dabbed the champagne off his thigh with a napkin, excused himself, and got up from his seat.

“I should wash up first. Please continue your conversation. Excuse me.”

Manager Han watched Lau’s retreating figure as he crossed the hall towards the restroom.

No one could have imagined that there was any connection between the name ‘Seo Yi-hyun’ and Lau’s mistake. Only Manager Han, Choi In-woo, and Kwon Juhan exchanged bitter glances.

“I also saw the article about Seo’s new work. The ‘Colorful Ghosts’ series. It’s as powerful as ever, isn’t it?”

“Seo is a very diligent young artist. Working hard is a very important virtue for an artist.”

The woman with the white brooch, who had always thought highly of Lee Hyun, nodded with a pleased expression. Behind her, someone cautiously raised a different opinion in an excited tone.

“It seems like the critical response to this work is also sharply divided, though?”

“Young artists should try things like that. You have to push your individuality to the extreme to find your true self. You can’t be an artist if you’re just looking at what the critics think. Of course, his recent works are good too, but I’m really looking forward to Seo’s works after he turns thirty.”

“Still, I don’t really like that artist.”

A man named Jeongmin, who had been silently listening until then, interjected with a stiff voice.

“Oh? What do you mean, you don’t like him?”

“You have to be a good person before you’re an artist. I can’t separate the work from the artist.”

“Why? What are you talking about? Did Seo have some kind of scandal?”

The man with the horn-rimmed glasses tilted his head and asked.

“Honestly, Seo Yi-hyun was able to get to where he is thanks to CEO Ryu. The CEO discovered him and barely gave him a foothold, but he immediately went to The Hands… Honestly, it seems opportunistic to me.”

Lau’s footsteps could be heard just as Jeongmin was finishing his sentence. Manager Han involuntarily checked his expression. It was a composed blank face, but judging by the distance, he must have heard everything Jeongmin said.

“CEO Ryu, your pants? Are you sure you don’t want to change?”

“It’s downstairs. It looks like the gathering will be over soon anyway, so I’ll change later.”

Lau shrugged in response to someone’s concerned words and sat down. He must have heard Jeongmin’s words, but he seemed to have decided not to react to them individually. It was a relief.

“Opportunistic… I’ve only greeted Seo Yi-hyun a few times at Phantom, but he didn’t seem like that kind of person.”

“That’s right. He was such a gentle young man, it’s surprising that he paints such intense works.”

“Seo is like a mild milk soap.”

I wished they would stop talking about Lee Hyun at this point, but the situation didn’t go as Manager Han hoped.

Lau pretended to be indifferent to the topic, only fiddling with the stem of his champagne glass. Then, for a moment, a brief smile flickered across his lips and disappeared. It was a reaction to hearing the analogy of him being like a mild milk soap. It was a smile that seemed to be filled with emotion after hearing news of a past lover he had once loved passionately.

Has he become okay with talking about Lee Hyun now?

Has the emotion he was so abnormally obsessed with turned into a memory of the past?

Was the mistake earlier just a coincidence, and not because of the name Seo Yi-hyun?

“You can’t know what someone is like just by looking at their appearance.”

Jeongmin stuck to his opinion, no matter what people said.

He became a customer of Phantom after Lee Hyun left for Paris, so he wouldn’t have had a chance to notice that there was something between Lau and Lee Hyun. Is he really misunderstanding Lee Hyun’s trip to Paris, and not just out of jealousy?

“That’s true, too, I guess.”

Someone appeared who agreed with Jeongmin, even while feeling uneasy. However, the woman with the white brooch spoke with a confident tone.

“But it’s also true that when you get to our age, you develop an eye for distinguishing between what’s real and what’s fake. In my opinion, Seo is not someone who is two-faced.”

“Still, the fact that he took an offer from another place and abandoned Phantom before his contract period was over is undeniable.”

Jeongmin’s stubbornness was slowly making the atmosphere awkward. Kwon Juhan, who was quick to notice this, slyly joined the conversation with his unique smoothness.

“Hey, don’t say it like that. Seo Yi-hyun received the offer because he’s talented, and the CEO encouraged him to go and gain experience there because it was a good opportunity.”

At the end of Juhan’s words, Jeongmin looked at Lau across from him. A nonchalant man who didn’t even glance at him and just sat there sipping champagne.

Jeongmin thought. Maybe trying to seduce Lau with Pheromone was too hasty a decision.

The intentional release of Pheromone was like showing your naked body in front of the other person. He stood before him completely naked, without a single thread, and it was like hearing him say, ‘Your naked body doesn’t excite me, so put some clothes on.’

How desperate must he have been to go that far? Couldn’t he have been more gentlemanly and refused while wrapping a towel around his naked body?

Even so, he didn’t feel like giving up on him, even after being insulted like that.

“CEO Ryu always thinks from the artists’ perspective. The more kind people like that are, the more they should have kept their loyalty. Just because he told him to go doesn’t mean he should have actually gone… I don’t think it looks good.”

“Let’s stop talking about this. He was our affiliated artist, and it was a mutually agreed-upon matter.”

Lau, who had been silent until then, said to Jeongmin in a subdued voice.

“It’s because the CEO is too generous and lenient that you get taken advantage of. It was an opportunity that wouldn’t have existed in the first place if it weren’t for the CEO, but his ingratitude is too much.”

“No, I’m saying Lee Hyun… Seo Yi-hyun didn’t betray him.”

Kwon Juhan looked at Lau, not knowing what to do in an awkward posture. However, Jeongmin, who was convinced that Lau had been betrayed by Seo Yi-hyun, increased the intensity of his criticism towards Lee Hyun. It was a strategy to stand up for Lau in his own way.

“Everyone was fooled by his gentle appearance. In fact, he was more of a fox than anyone else….”

Clang.

Lau’s hand was rough as he put down the empty champagne glass. He glared at Jeongmin across from him with seething eyes. His eyes were bloodshot and glistening, as if he had suddenly become very drunk in that short time.

“It might be the opposite.”

“The opposite?”

“It might not be that Seo Yi-hyun used me, but that I committed a sin against Seo Yi-hyun that forced him to leave.”

“That can’t be true. What could someone like you have done wrong to such a rookie artist? He just goes around backstabbing people with an innocent face….”

This time, Lau jumped up from his seat. And he walked around the long table and approached Jeongmin from behind.

“Get up.”

“…Pardon?”

“Shut your mouth, get up, and get out.”

“What did you say?”

“Get out of my gallery right now.”

A mess broke out. Lau grabbed Jeongmin by the scruff of his neck and dragged him out of his chair.

The chair fell over, the table shook, the champagne glasses fell, and the startled customers got up from their seats and became agitated. Ignoring Jeongmin’s resistance, Lau dragged him down the stairs.

“What’s wrong with CEO Ryu? I’ve never seen him like that before.”

“I know. That gentle man….”

“The CEO must have had too much to drink today. You know how much he cares about his affiliated artists. Lee Hyun and… no, he didn’t break up badly with Seo, but he keeps getting misunderstood, so he must have gotten angry about that.”

While Juhan skillfully calmed the other customers, Manager Han called the on-site staff to clean up the mess. In the meantime, the two men were halfway down the marble staircase that curved in an elegant arc.

Manager Han sighed deeply and circled his temples with his fingertips, trying to follow Lau. However, someone placed a hand on Manager Han’s shoulder and stopped him. It was Choi In-woo.

“I’ll go.”

Downstairs, Lau had already thrown open the heavy double doors. Choi In-woo followed him and ran down the stairs.

Who said he was doing better?

He hadn’t forgotten, and he had no intention of forgetting, that man.

He may look fine on the outside, but he was clearly bleeding in a place where no one could see him, with serious internal injuries. His heart wasn’t here. In this place without Lee Hyun, he was just wandering around like a Ghost.

■ ■ ■

As the two men entered the entrance, the sensor above their heads turned on the lights.

“How far are you going to follow me?”

Lau, who had been leading the way, turned around with a dissatisfied expression. Because of the close distance to his height, Choi In-woo’s face was shadowed.

“It’s an order to watch you until you get home safely.”

“An order? From whom?”

“Manager Han.”

“……”

Lau, perhaps aware of the seriousness of the commotion he had just caused, smiled awkwardly, took off his shoes, and changed into indoor slippers.

It had been a long time since Choi In-woo had visited Lau’s house.

There was a time when he used to come and go often, spending lively times in the garden, living room, and kitchen. It was when Lau Wikun was most like a person. When Seo Yi-hyun was here….

You could enter the house directly from the parking lot through the basement. However, Lau parked his car, left the parking lot, and chose the troublesome path of crossing the garden and entering through the front door.

The reason was obvious. There was no need to ask.

He must be preserving the basement where Lee Hyun lived as it was.

Choi In-woo, who followed Lau into the hallway, frowned as he looked around the dark living room.

“What’s wrong with this house?”

“It’s perfectly clean, why are you picking on me?”

Lau replied in a tired voice as he crossed the living room and entered the dining room.

“I’m saying it’s too clean. It doesn’t feel like a house where people live.”

This time, Lau didn’t even bother to reply. He stood in the dark kitchen, took a bottle of water from the refrigerator, and drank it straight from the bottle without pouring it into a cup. Then, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and asked Choi In-woo if he needed water.

“Want some?”

“Not water, give me some alcohol.”

“You’ve been drinking all this time, what alcohol?”

“Should I stay over?”

“Don’t say disgusting things and go.”

“Who said I was going to sleep with you? I’m not into Alpha with bigger muscles than me.”

“……”

“If you have any good wine hidden away, take it out. Let’s drink until morning for the first time in a while.”

“I’m tired. I’m not in the mood.”

Lau waved his hand, passed Choi In-woo, and went back the way he came, trudging towards the stairs. It was completely different from the Lau he knew. He was like a Ghost with a heavy iron ball chained to his ankle.

“…Lau Wikun.”

He had never called him in such a hesitant voice.

Choi In-woo, facing Lau who had turned around, couldn’t bring himself to say what he was going to say.

Tell him to go to Lee Hyun. If he really loses Lee Hyun, he will live a life worse than death in an even more terrible state than he is now. Wouldn’t it be better to get down on his knees and beg?

He couldn’t say it.

Because his eyes were already so desperately wanting to do so.

The blackest thing must be his own heart, which wants to do it so much but can’t.

“Never mind. Go to sleep.”

After Choi In-woo left, Lau’s feet, which had been climbing the stairs with heavy steps, gradually slowed down and stopped. He stood there in the darkness for a while, then turned around and headed for the basement.

He went down the stairs and turned on only the minimum amount of indirect lighting.

It felt like Lee Hyun, who was preparing to sleep next to the bed, would turn around and smile shyly. If he asked, ‘Can I sleep here?’, he would silently lift one side of the blanket.

Or, he might be able to see Lee Hyun’s back as he sat in front of the easel with a brush in his hand, not even knowing that it was late.

When Lau watched Lee Hyun’s engrossed back for a long time, he would suddenly feel afraid and lonely. There were times when he trembled with a sense of Alienation, feeling as if Lee Hyun, who was swimming freely and uninhibitedly in his own world, would not return to this world to which he belonged.

He would make a sound and approach Lee Hyun from behind, overlapping his hand with the hand holding the brush, forcing him to look at him, overlapping his lips, and trapping him in his arms, away from the painting… Nights of sweet anxiety.

Lau slowly approached the large H Frame easel. He pushed and pulled it, rolling the wheels for no reason.

Lee Hyun’s tools and materials were gone, but the easel, chair, and trolley remained. The furniture, three or four potted plants, and small household items were still there.

The yellowish light from the garden shone obliquely through the window above his head. He stood blankly on the stage of dim light and looked around the empty room. As if he was looking for the owner of this room, even though he knew he had already left.

He hung his head and stroked the back of his neck before approaching the bed. It was a place he had personally tidied up just a few days ago. He sat on the edge and stroked the sheet with his palm. The bedding was also all the same as what Lee Hyun had used.

He didn’t entrust anything about this basement to the Housekeeper who helped with the housework. He took care of everything with his own hands.

That’s how it is now, but for a long time, he hadn’t even dared to come down here. It was only after meeting Im Morae and Seo Yi-han in Bali last summer that he was able to set foot here for the first time.

But even now, he still couldn’t bring himself to sleep here.

He knew that everyone who knew about his relationship with Lee Hyun was worried about him. Whenever the name Seo Yi-hyun was heard somewhere, everyone looked at him with almost horrified faces, as if a bomb had dropped.

It was the same today. The faces of Manager Han, Kwon Juhan, and Choi In-woo, who stiffened for a moment when one of the customers mentioned Lee Hyun’s name. And then, the glances that subtly checked his expression.

Lau chuckled bitterly and clasped his hands together on his lap.

Even if he wanted to tell them about his current state, he couldn’t. He couldn’t share this feeling with anyone.

Trying to explain his current self was like trying to move the water of the sea with his hands.

Even if you scoop up the seawater in your hands, you can’t show the sea with it. Nothing is explained. So he had simply decided to keep his mouth shut.

Just like he had lived without sharing this unique trait, no, this deformed trait, called Ghost with anyone. Even this state of precipitation derived from his love with Lee Hyun was solely his responsibility.

He took a shower in the basement bathroom as he was. The closet had some underwear, pajamas, and loungewear that Lau could use.

And, striped T-shirts were neatly hung on hangers.

After Lee Hyun left, he bought them whenever he saw them, and before he knew it, he had more than ten of them. He flipped through the neatly hung T-shirts one by one before closing the closet door.

He dried his wet hair with a towel and stood in front of the bookshelf. It was a bookshelf where he had collected Lee Hyun’s media appearances. Even though he had bought all the overseas art magazines, the amount was only enough to fill one shelf.

He took out the most recently released magazine and went to the bed. It was an experimental art magazine based in Berlin. He opened the part marked with an index tab.

It was an article about an editor who visited The Hands in Paris and covered Lee Hyun’s new work. It was the seventh work in Lee Hyun’s latest series, ‘Colorful Ghosts’, which customers at Phantom were talking about.

The article, which included a short account of meeting Lee Hyun and talking to him, although not an interview, covered other artists belonging to The Hands as well and continued for four pages.

It was content he had already read dozens of times. Yet, unfailingly, he read it as if seeing it for the first time, engraving each character into his mind. Rau, who had slid the towel covering his head down to rest on his thighs, was engrossed in the article.

When asked to introduce his work, Lee Hyun smiled, seemingly at a loss. It was a smile that suggested he had already said everything he wanted to say through his work, and what more was needed. The neatness of his hands clasped together evoked the image of a shy young Asian man from common stereotypes, but his firm eyes reminded one that he was a being who was serene but never weak.

The Lee Hyun he met in person was a man who was his work itself.

The eye of the storm.

The critics had long been saying that what he wanted to convey was chaos and anxiety, but as the series progressed, a different story emerged. Wasn’t he, rather, talking about something that never wavered even amidst chaos and anxiety? Just like Lee Hyun himself.

Lee Hyun had never agreed to media photoshoots, and this time was no different. Instead, photos of his work were properly featured.

In his work, the characters, with their exaggerated features, were literally colorful. Therefore, it was easy to see them as chaotic at first glance. However, as the article he had just read expressed, there was definitely an unwavering core within them.

The artist’s gaze upon chaos.

That gaze accepted the diverse ‘Ghosts’ that seemed incompatible with each other as they were. The Ghosts did not clash with each other, but rather harmonized.

‘Wasn’t he, rather, talking about something that never wavered even amidst chaos and anxiety? Just like Lee Hyun himself.’

Rau read that passage repeatedly.

There were people who properly looked at Lee Hyun’s work and properly understood it. While that was welcome, touching, and grateful, on the other hand, a dark possessiveness stirred within him, a desire not to share Lee Hyun.

In fact, he wanted to own all of Lee Hyun’s published works.

If he set his mind to it, he could carry it out without Lee Hyun finding out. But he would never do that. Because it would be a betrayal of Lee Hyun’s choices and efforts.

While at The Hands, Lee Hyun had to make himself known and be evaluated solely on his talent. To do so, he was enduring much criticism, neglect, and sometimes even ridicule, continuing his unwavering artistic activities.

If Rau secretly bought up Lee Hyun’s works as soon as they were released here, it would be the same as nullifying those efforts.

It was okay not to possess him.

The intense desire to possess him was still there, but hadn’t he realized painfully that possession was not the end of love?

Rau carefully stroked Lee Hyun’s work on the page with his fingertips.

He just knew it. That Lee Hyun was also going through a difficult time.

Not to punish the bad guy Lau Wikun, but to forgive him.

Not to forget each other, but to endure this time for the day they could be together again.

That he still loved him. That he wanted to forgive him. So please, steadfastly wait for him. Lee Hyun was saying it through his paintings. By painting the ‘Ghosts’ in his works so beautifully.

Rau closed the magazine and put it back in its place. And before turning off the lights, he looked around the empty room once more. It felt as if the whole room had been emptied just because one person was gone. Hesitating as if he couldn’t bear to look, Rau turned his head and headed for his bedroom.

After taking care of various trivial matters as part of his pre-bed routine, he stood beside the bed. He picked up the frame on the bedside table and smiled briefly.

A tall rabbit wearing a handsome best Wetsuit and holding a pocket watch.

It was Lau Wikun’s appearance as drawn by Lee Hyun.

He lay down on the left side of the bed, leaving the spot next to him empty instead of lying in the center. When he slept with Lee Hyun here, Lee Hyun’s spot was always on the right. When he lay down, was hanging directly in front of him.

He lay on his side, looking at Lee Hyun’s empty spot. He took one of the two stacked pillows and hugged it.

He was alone now in the bed where their Pheromones had been stirred together as Ghost and Diamond Dust, communicating hotly.

The blood flowing through his body was boiling as if burning, yearning for Lee Hyun. For his only Diamond Dust.

He closed his eyes and murmured as if chanting a spell to quell the withdrawal symptoms.

“Seo Yi-hyun.”

He curled up even more and hugged the pillow tightly.

“Hyun-i, see you tomorrow.”

■ ■ ■

Saturday.

Seoul.

The weather is cloudy.

Somewhat chilly temperature compared to the average year.

“The autumn foliage in the garden is beautifully colored. In just the last few days.”

That was Housekeeper’s first greeting upon arriving to take care of the house. Rau, who greeted her at the entrance, glanced outside through the crack in the open door.

“I guess it’s because it got cold quickly. Was it hard for you to come so early?”

“It’s not early for me. I had breakfast and even leisurely drank a cup of tea before coming, you know. CEO Ryu must have been busy preparing for the group exhibition. The official opening is next Friday, right?”

“Yes, that’s right. So there’s a lot of laundry piled up, and the dressing room on the second floor is a bit of a mess… I’m sorry.”

“That’s my job, what are you talking about? Or should I have looked in more often? Have you been eating properly?”

“I’ve been eating out most of the time.”

“But you’re going on another business trip without even catching your breath? Going on business trips every weekend, your body won’t last.”

Looking down at the Boston bag placed on the stool in front of the entrance, Housekeeper clicked her tongue with concern. Although it was an excuse he had made up himself, Rau smiled awkwardly at the word “business trip” and changed the subject.

“You know I’m healthy.”

“You shouldn’t be so overconfident. What about the herbal medicine I had made for you before? Are you taking it regularly?”

“Oh? I think I have to go because of my flight time.”

Checking his wristwatch while pulling up the sleeve of his trench coat, Rau acted exaggeratedly and playfully.

“Not trying to avoid my nagging, are you?”

Rau smiled at Housekeeper, who was giving him a sidelong glance, and affectionately stroked her arm.

“I’ll be back. I bought fig cake in the pantry. The one you said was delicious last time. Eat it with your family.”

“You said you were busy. You didn’t have to bother with that. Thank you as always.”

Putting on his loafers and picking up his Boston bag, Rau carefully added a final request before leaving the entrance.

“I’m always grateful. And the basement… you know, right?”

“Of course, don’t worry, I won’t touch the basement or even go down there.”

“Yes, please take care of it. I’m leaving. Don’t come out!”

Despite Rau’s plea not to come out, she stepped outside the entrance. Affectionate nagging followed Rau’s retreating figure towards the gate.

“Handsome looks, successful business, thoughtful care for people… Why hasn’t such a perfect person found a partner yet…? You shouldn’t be so picky!”

“I’ll be back!”

Pretending not to hear, he raised his arm high and waved at her.

That he hasn’t found a partner because he’s too picky.

Rau chuckled to himself as he got into the back seat of the waiting sedan.

Ah, but maybe that’s true. The fact that the person he’s waiting for and longing for is Seo Yi-hyun means he’s being very picky. That makes sense.

With a bitter smile, he looked out the window. The vegetation around the Han River was now showing the full colors of autumn.

It had already been several months since he started flying back and forth to Paris, spending more than twenty-five hours on the plane every weekend. It had been since he went to Bali for his summer vacation.

He had met Im Morae and Seo Yi-han at Double Six Beach in Bali.

In the first place, ‘meeting’ wasn’t the purpose. He hadn’t even thought that they would recognize him. It was just a trip to spy on them. Perhaps he wanted to soothe his longing, even indirectly, by watching them, the people who were precious to Lee Hyun.

But Im Morae recognized Rau at once and approached him. And pointing to the Rau in the painting that Lee Hyun had drawn, she had said.

“How could I not recognize you? Lee Hyun really has a talent.”

The man in the painting with big rabbit ears and looking at the pocket watch hanging from his vest. It was Rau himself, no matter how you looked at it.

Alice in Wonderland.

The pocket watch rabbit guiding her to Wonderland.

That was how Lee Hyun was depicting Rau.

In front of that painting, he could no longer control his longing. He had gone there to soothe his longing, but instead, he had completely broken down emotionally.

Until then, Rau had been at a loss after letting Lee Hyun go.

Should he fly to Paris and cling to him selfishly? If he cried and begged, saying he felt like he was going to die and go crazy, wouldn’t Lee Hyun accept him out of pity, even if it was just out of pity? He had thought about that countless times a day. He had actually booked tickets to Paris several times.

But he didn’t want to be accepted by Lee Hyun in that way.

Mere pity was not enough. He wanted his whole heart.

Rau, who had only repeated the process of booking and canceling plane tickets, changed his mind after his trip to Bali.

He decided to just focus on surviving for now. He had to survive in order to wait for him. To do so, he came to the conclusion that he could only breathe if he watched him, even from afar.

He booked a ticket to Paris, and this time he didn’t cancel it.

This suspicious business trip started then.

■ ■ ■

Paris. 19th arrondissement.

Time difference of 7 hours from Seoul.

The weather is a bit colder than in Seoul.

“It’s rare to find Haussmann-style buildings in the 19th arrondissement, so it has a certain charm. There’s also an elevator. It’s cramped, though.”

The real estate agent smiled and pressed the close button on the elevator. Rau, who was following behind him with his hands in the pockets of his trench coat, nodded silently. The ceiling of the elevator seemed to almost touch the top of his head.

“Within the range you mentioned, this is the closest property to The Hands. It came on the market on Wednesday, and it’s already popular. I had a hard time holding it for you until you could visit.”

The real estate agent shrugged his shoulders and spoke in a slightly boastful tone.

It had already been a month since he started apartment hunting to find a house in the 19th arrondissement, where The Hands was located. He was looking at three or four houses each time he visited, but a property he liked didn’t appear easily.

The conditions Rau set were, in a way, simple.

It had to be as close to The Hands as possible. But, excluding the house directly across from it.

That was all.

The elevator stopped on the 6th floor. There were three front doors surrounding the hallway. The agent rummaged through his bunch of keys and opened the door to number 601, which faced the elevator. A real estate agent with a bunch of keys. It was quite a different scene from Korea.

“The area around the canal has long been a new hot spot in Paris. There are many trendy cafes and restaurants, and there are also supermarkets like ALDI

1

) and MONOPRIX

2

) nearby, as well as bakeries, so it will be convenient for you to live here.”

“I’m not going to be living here, so I don’t mind a little inconvenience.”

At Rau’s blunt reply, the agent slightly raised the corners of his lips.

After turning the key in a complicated way, the agent opened the door. Unlike the hallway, which was completely dark, the space inside the door was filled with light. Thanks to that, the house looked a little bigger.

“What do you think? It’s not small for a studio in Paris.”

“I don’t care about the size of the house. Location is more important to me.”

There was not much to look around, and the spaces on both sides visible from the center were all there was to the house. The special thing was that it was long horizontally, so it was possible to separate the space to some extent even though it was a studio type. And, most of that long wall was a window, so there was plenty of light.

After looking around the kitchen and bathroom occupying the north end, Rau asked with a stiff expression.

“How is Monsieur

3

) Dupont’s apartment? Is he still not willing to sell it?”

Another apartment in the 19th arrondissement where an elderly couple in their seventies lived.

That apartment was Rau’s most coveted item, and it was located in a perfect location. It was on the same street as The Hands, but not directly across from it. It was located diagonally, and the communal entrance was around the corner, making it suitable for hiding from people coming and going from The Hands.

In particular, Monsieur Dupont’s house was on the same floor as Lee Hyun’s room.

If he stood by the bedroom window, he might be able to see Lee Hyun’s shadow moving back and forth in the room.

The problem was that it wasn’t a property that was on the market. Rau was the only one coveting it. The agent shook his head with a troubled expression.

“I offered the purchase price you mentioned, but it didn’t work. To be honest, I thought they would waver at that price… but they didn’t budge. I was a little surprised. I think you should give up on that house.”

“Hmm, that’s a shame.”

With both hands in the pockets of his trench coat, Rau shrugged his shoulders. It was hard to hide his disappointment. He went to the window and looked out at the building across the street. As he had seen on the way in, there was a famous supermarket on the first floor of the light blue building.

“They said they rented for a while when they were newlyweds and then bought their first house, and they’ve lived there for 30 years since then.”

“……”

Rau, who was pulling back the thin inner curtain and looking down at the people coming and going from the building across the street, turned to the agent.

“Now their children have all left home, and it’s too big for the two of them to live in and manage… They say they can’t leave because the house contains all the years they’ve lived as a couple.”

She shrugged her shoulders, saying that it couldn’t be helped.

After looking at her for a while, Rau turned his head back to the window. Two men who looked about the same age as Rau were just coming out of the supermarket. The taller of the two was wearing a baby carrier, and the other was carrying a shopping basket on his shoulder. They were probably a male Alpha and male Omega couple.

The man wearing the baby carrier was fiddling with the baby’s feet, which were wearing thick socks, and holding the other’s hand with his other hand.

The shorter man, who was pointing at something across the street, turned to look at his lover. The two people who kissed briefly walked slowly along the streets of Paris on a leisurely weekend afternoon.

At the sight of strangers who had nothing to do with him, his heart suddenly ached as if it were being torn apart.

Such a happy daily life could have been his and Lee Hyun’s. It was none other than his own madness that had ruined it and smashed it to pieces.

“Did you ever dream of having a child through me someday?”

“…….”

“So you were trying to make me… an Omega?”

He remembers Lee Hyun’s eyes and face as he said that. The face that was sad and pessimistic even in that moment when he was trying to shock and hurt Rau with the lie that he was pregnant.

“I don’t need a child. I’ve never even thought that far!

That desperate cry was sincere. If he had wanted a child, he wouldn’t have needed Lee Hyun as the partner.

At the time, Rau was out of his mind. He was trying to use the Pheromones he despised so much to keep Lee Hyun by his side. Whether it was an Alpha’s Pheromones or a Ghost’s Pheromones, it didn’t matter.

If I had gone as far as getting Lee Hyun pregnant at that time….

That child would have been nothing more than a hostage to keep Lee Hyun by my side. Even though it was my and Lee Hyun’s child.

He felt a chill. He vividly realized how abnormal he had been at the time.

Rau covered his entire lower face with his large hand. He rubbed it as if crushing his skin. He nodded his head, looking at the peaceful backs of the two men moving away to the south.

“30 years as a couple in one house… I guess so. I wouldn’t have sold it either.”

After saying that in a thoughtful voice, Rau moved away from the window. When he turned to the agent, he had a look on his face as if he had made up his mind.

“Let’s give up on that house. I’ll sign the contract for this place.”

“You’ve made a good decision. It’s vacant, so you can use it as soon as the sale is completed.”

The apartment hunting that had lasted for about a month was finally over. The agent also looked relieved.

■ ■ ■

The purpose of going to Paris was clear.

To hover around Lee Hyun and capture his image in his eyes.

In the early days of going back and forth to Paris, he focused on figuring out Lee Hyun’s daily routine.

As it had been when they lived together in Seoul, Lee Hyun’s day was very regular. The time he worked, the time he went out, and the cafes and restaurants he frequented were almost constant. Lee Hyun was a fairly easy person to stalk.

After grasping the general routine to some extent, I stopped following Lee Hyun around every single day. It wasn’t easy to tail someone by car in the narrow alleys of Paris, and I couldn’t risk following him on foot.

I could see Lee Hyun almost without fail just by waiting at predetermined locations. As if I had an appointment with him.

That was satisfying enough. And it had to be.

The day after signing the apartment contract, Rau parked his car diagonally across from The Hands after leaving the hotel. He was waiting for Lee Hyun to go out for his morning walk.

The darkly tinted, unremarkable vehicle was perfect for hiding.

Until now, he had rented a car every time he visited Paris, but yesterday, after parting ways with the broker, he signed a contract for a new car. Now that he had a fixed residence in Paris, it seemed okay to buy a car.

Foreigners needed complicated documents and administrative procedures to buy an apartment, but that was a matter for the broker and agent to handle. Having an apartment and a car would significantly reduce wasted time.

He would have even more time to focus on Lee Hyun. Rau was satisfied with his improved stalking environment.

“…….”

Rau’s eyebrows twitched as he leaned over the steering wheel, watching the front door of The Hands.

He slowly raised himself up without taking his eyes off his target.

Lee Hyun, with an eco-bag slung over his shoulder, was just leaving the building. It was as if real morning was just beginning in the narrow, shabby alleys of the 19th arrondissement. At least, it was for Rau. His heart beat rapidly.

“Seo Yi-hyun, good morning.”

He greeted Lee Hyun quietly, knowing he couldn’t hear him.

Lee Hyun would definitely turn the corner and stop by his favorite cafe first. He would have a simple meal of a sandwich or salad, or a piece of bread with coffee, and then go for his morning walk.

His walking spots were mainly around the canal or Buttes-Chaumont Park. Sometimes he went to Parc de la Villette, and occasionally he walked to Père Lachaise Cemetery, a round trip of about two hours, with a deeply thoughtful expression. Based on his observations so far, it was certain.

Rau’s car was parked on the opposite side of the regular cafe, in the direction Lee Hyun was moving. Still, the stalker’s heart pounded, wondering if he might be discovered.

Only after Lee Hyun disappeared around the corner did Rau’s sedan start moving. Since he knew the destination, there was no need to follow too closely and risk being noticed.

Lee Hyun’s favorite cafe was located by the canal. The building next door was a pizza place on the first floor. Rau slowly parked his car in front of the pizza place.

Lee Hyun, wearing jeans and an autumn jacket, was sitting at an outdoor table at the cafe. Under the blue awning, at the far end of the row. It was Lee Hyun’s favorite seat when sitting outdoors.

“Isn’t it a bit chilly to sit outside?”

Rau immediately checked the temperature on the car’s tablet screen. It was 8 degrees Celsius.

His worried gaze turned to Lee Hyun. Waiting for his order to arrive, he took out a sketchbook and pencil. He was lightly warming up his hand before starting the day.

He didn’t seem to be shivering from the cold, but Rau wasn’t comfortable. His jacket didn’t seem thick enough.

Even in the middle of winter, you could often see Parisians sitting on benches in the Luxembourg Gardens or Tuileries Garden, reading books as long as the sun was out. But at this temperature, tourists would all avoid the outdoors and prefer the warm indoors.

Even though Lee Hyun’s neck, without a scarf, looked cold, even though he wanted to button up his jacket, there was nothing he could do for him now. Once he was his closest person, even inside him….

Rau hid his bitterness and forced a smile, as if speaking directly to Lee Hyun.

“Our Seo Yi-hyun, you’ve become a real Parisian.”

Unaware that someone was watching him, Lee Hyun began to sketch the surrounding objects, scenery, and people. Judging by the busy movement of his eyes, he seemed to be drawing the bicycle parked in front of him.

As he watched his focused, neat face, the rigid worry on Rau’s face slowly melted away. Instead, a gentle loveliness filled the space.

Lee Hyun exchanged a few words with the waiter who brought his order. They even laughed together about something.

Every time Lee Hyun smiled, Rau was unconsciously smiling too. Like an audience member who is moved by the emotions of the protagonist in a movie, crying and laughing along with him.

Seo Yi-hyun was like a beautifully composed movie to Rau Wikun. A masterpiece that never gets old, no matter how many times you watch it, and makes you admire the same scenes every time.

While eating and drinking coffee, Lee Hyun sometimes put down his pen and looked into the distance. The sharp observer’s gaze captured the peaceful waves of the canal, or looked at the modern apartments built across the canal. He looked up at the bare tree in front of the cafe, which had almost lost all its leaves, and occasionally stared for a long time in the direction where Rau’s car was parked.

It couldn’t be, but there were moments when he felt like he had made eye contact with Lee Hyun.

At those times, it felt like his rapidly beating heart would stop completely. He couldn’t move, as if his heart had been pierced and pinned to a specimen board like a stag beetle.

Was Lee Hyun about to notice something?

Was he going to stare at this side, put down his coffee, get up, and come closer?

Was he going to wander around the car and finally knock, knock, on the driver’s side window?

Was I afraid that would happen? Or was I hoping it would?

Fortunately or unfortunately, that never happened.

Lee Hyun began to gather his things. He took out his pencil case and put in his pencils, closed his notebook, and put it in his bag.

“Are you leaving already?”

With a face full of regret, Rau gripped the steering wheel and tapped its surface.

“Show me your face a little longer.”

Just as Lee Hyun was about to get up after paying, a couple approached the outdoor seating area. With their arms around each other’s waists and shoulders, they had a dog with big ears.

While the two were briefly considering which seat to take, the puppy showed interest in Lee Hyun. The young, energetic fellow lunged at Lee Hyun’s calf, seeking attention.

Lee Hyun, who was about to get up, put his eco-bag back on the back of his chair and accepted the puppy’s playfulness. He turned his body completely towards it, making his face even more visible than before. His coat opened up, slightly revealing the T-shirt he was wearing underneath. Invariably, it was striped.

A welcome and longing smile escaped Rau’s lips.

Lee Hyun’s striped T-shirt seemed to be proof that Seo Yi-hyun, who said he loved him, and the current Seo Yi-hyun were still the same person, that he hadn’t changed.

The couple, noticing the puppy’s movements, spoke to Lee Hyun, and Lee Hyun stroked the puppy with both hands while looking up at them and continuing the conversation.

“You must be very popular with animals. Why wouldn’t you be?”

Rau, resting his chin on his hands placed on top of the steering wheel, simply watched Lee Hyun with a contented smile. He was grateful that he could see him a little longer thanks to the puppy.

Lee Hyun’s touch, stroking the puppy’s face and neck, seemed quite skilled. It wasn’t something he had only done once or twice.

Perhaps he had looked up how to make dogs feel good because he was always popular with the neighborhood dogs whenever he came to the cafe. Lee Hyun was certainly capable of that.

While talking to Lee Hyun, the couple naturally took a seat at the table next to him. Even from a distance, the atmosphere looked very pleasant. A beautiful young man from the East, with a clear and pure ink painting-like atmosphere, had a kind smile and voice, so who wouldn’t be attracted to him?

“Don’t be so kind.”

Rau whispered quietly, resting his chin on the steering wheel.

“What if they both fall for you?”

One-third was sincere, one-third was a joke. And the remaining one-third was pride in his lover, who was loved by everyone.

Lover….

The smile slowly faded from Rau’s contented face. The blue in his eyes was more heavily tinged with gray.

He looked at Lee Hyun, who was stroking the puppy’s small face, and asked quietly.

“Are we still lovers, Lee Hyun-i?”

But of course, he couldn’t get an answer from him.

Lee Hyun took out his cell phone. Judging by his gestures, he seemed to be asking the couple if he could take a picture of the puppy. They readily agreed.

Lee Hyun seemed to be taking quite a few pictures of the playful face of the puppy, who had his front paws on his lap. Laughter never ceased between the three of them, as if they were old friends.

The sight of Lee Hyun smiling in this distant place, away from him, gave Rau conflicting emotions.

But he couldn’t wish for Lee Hyun to be living in tears either….

Finally, Lee Hyun got up from his seat and slung his bag over his shoulder. The puppy, clinging to Lee Hyun’s calf with his front paws, seemed to be holding him back, telling him not to go. After stroking the puppy’s head a few more times, Lee Hyun completely left the cafe area.

The puppy looked in the direction Lee Hyun was walking away, then turned to look at his owners. Then he looked at Lee Hyun again. It was as if he didn’t understand why Lee Hyun was leaving already without playing with him more.

Because the puppy was doing that, Lee Hyun stopped and looked back several times. He burst into an endearing laugh and waved to the puppy and the couple.

“You’re cuter, though?”

While watching Lee Hyun waving, Rau also unfolded the hand he had been resting his chin on and waved it slightly.

Stalking isn’t something anyone can do. It was a job that required talking to someone who doesn’t answer, smiling while looking at a smile that wasn’t directed at you, and waving while looking at that person looking at someone else.

Rau suddenly realized.

This was similar to unrequited love.

Unrequited love. He had never even experienced it during his most sentimental adolescence.

Come to think of it, it was during that very adolescence that Rau received the ‘sentence’ of being a Ghost and fled to Boston, USA, with his mother, almost as if he were running away. Even the unrequited love of looking at someone alone and agonizing over them was a luxury for Rau at the time.

He had only focused on training to become a Golden there. To avoid unknowingly turning some Beta into an Omega. To avoid committing such a terrible act.

Rau bitterly scoffed, his shoulders drooping.

Despite those efforts, he had ended up Changing the most precious person.

If he became a Golden Alpha and could control his Pheromones, he could also prevent Changing. Changing was, after all, in the realm of Pheromones.

If a very high-ranking Golden Omega was determined, they could confuse and interfere with the control of a Golden Alpha. But Changing was the act of transforming a Beta into an Omega. It was not at all difficult for Rau Wikun to control his Pheromones and Changing against a Beta who did not have Pheromones,

Except for one very special, single person.

Diamond Dust.

Rau fixed his gaze on the receding back of Diamond Dust.

Judging by the direction he was walking, it seemed that his destination today was Parc de la Villette, further north, rather than Buttes-Chaumont Park.

When Lee Hyun’s calm back, walking along the canal, was about 50 meters away, he finally got out of the driver’s seat and headed to the cafe. He sat down at the very table where Lee Hyun had been sitting just a moment ago.

It was a lucky day. There were many times when someone else would take this seat as soon as Lee Hyun got up.

The puppy, who had been so friendly to Lee Hyun, sat upright next to his owners and looked up at Rau. He tilted his head and stared at him, barked once softly, but didn’t try to approach. He even made a whimpering sound and went to the opposite side of the table.

As chilly as the weather had become, the chair still had the warmth of the person who had been sitting there before. The warmth left by Lee Hyun.

He didn’t bother trying to calm the emotions that surged more intensely than that warmth. He simply let them be, as they shook him as they pleased. Anything that came from Lee Hyun was worth savoring as it was.

He ordered a warm latte and a croissant. The same menu that Lee Hyun had eaten at this table a little while ago. It was an ordinary menu, so the waiter who took the order didn’t find it strange at all.

Hiding in front of that person’s favorite cafe, sitting in the seat that person sat in, ordering the same menu that person ordered…. A proper stalker.

He scoffed at the thought and drank his coffee. The same taste and aroma of coffee that had warmed Lee Hyun’s body.

In fact, he was going crazy with worry about Lee Hyun’s body, as much as he missed him and wanted to be by his side.

Lee Hyun was about 50 percent Omegafied. If no additional Changing was done by a Ghost, the change would stop here. Even if the progress made inside his body was unavoidable, he could live the life of an ordinary Beta on the outside, as he had been doing so far.

He knew that ‘Diamond Dust’ was just an ordinary Beta when the ‘Ghost’ wasn’t around. He knew it in his head. But he was worried that Lee Hyun’s less mature sex hormones might suddenly cause problems.

He had asked Yooni to keep it a secret from Lee Hyun and to let him know if there was anything wrong with Lee Hyun’s health, but he couldn’t completely relax. He knew that Lee Hyun wouldn’t show his discomfort to the people around him unless he was really sick, which made him even more worried.

“Even if you had to physically separate yourself from him, you should have separated Lee Hyun from that situation itself.”

When he confessed that he was a Ghost and that he was turning Lee Hyun into an Omega, Choi In-woo had said that with a look of contempt. If he couldn’t resist the power of Pheromones by Lee Hyun’s side, he should have maintained a distance where Pheromones couldn’t act.

The ‘physical separation’ that Choi In-woo had talked about was probably a situation like this right now. Seo Yi-hyun and I living like strangers, separating me from Seo Yi-hyun’s life. That way, Seo Yi-hyun would be protected from being Changed.

Rau’s gaze, which had been silently watching the northern direction where Lee Hyun had disappeared, fell on the table. He reached into his trench coat pocket, took out a cigarette, and lit it.

The Pheromone attraction that exists between ‘Ghost’ and ‘Diamond Dust’.

It had an almost destructive power that couldn’t even be compared to the Pheromones between Alpha and Omega. A power so strong that Choi In-woo, who was awkwardly stuck between Regular and Golden, couldn’t even imagine.

No Golden Omega had ever broken through Rau’s defenses.

Rau had never used his Pheromones, and he had lived without being swayed by anyone’s Pheromones, to the point where he was teased for trying to become a Beta. That was Rau’s pride.

But Seo Yi-hyun’s, Diamond Dust’s, Pheromones had easily broken down Rau’s defenses. Broken down? No, they had melted them away without a trace.

He had tried taking more than the prescribed dose of suppressants, which he hadn’t needed since becoming a Golden, but it was useless. Lee Hyun’s Pheromones tore through such things as easily as paper and covered and swept over Rau. All the while, Lee Hyun himself was unaware that he was emitting Pheromones.

No, Pheromones don’t matter. That’s not the essence of the problem.

As Choi In-woo said, if he had cut off his relationship with Lee Hyun and lived without any connection, Lee Hyun would have been safe.

But he couldn’t do that.

He didn’t have the courage to explain what a Ghost was and ask him to accept the changes that were gradually turning him into an Omega every time they had a relationship. ―He didn’t have the courage to tear Lee Hyun away and send him far away.

Even if he went back to that moment, it would be the same.

It was wrong, and he regretted it with all his being. Because he had lost Lee Hyun because of it.

But he knew that even if he went back, he would repeat the same mistake. He would have no choice but to repeat the same sin, tormented by fear, like a machine whose functions were paralyzed and broken by a mysterious force.

He was glad that he seemed to be doing well here so far without any problems. Because he wasn’t a complete Omega, he had no problem with his daily life without taking suppressants. Lee Hyun, now free from the Ghost, was just a Beta.

Beta….

Lau Wikun’s lips deeply inhaled the cigarette filter.

He remembers Lee Hyun’s Pheromone. The richness and power that made it impossible to resist, as if the highest Golden Omega was deliberately secreting it. It would call out and draw in his own Pheromone, hidden deep behind his defenses, and then enchantingly coil around and swallow it…

He remembers the ecstasy of the two Pheromones achieving perfect unity and maximizing communication. How could he forget?

It was on a different level from the so-called ‘Pheromone sex’ that some groups who used Pheromones like drugs or hallucinogens talked about.

Opening the defenses completely with trust in the other person, and allowing one’s own Pheromone to react sensitively to the colors and rhythms created by the other’s Pheromone, slowly intertwining.

A sense of perfect unity where reason and instinct become one, in a state of completely surrendering oneself to the experience that the mixed Pheromones show, changing color, scent, and intensity from moment to moment.

It was not the animalistic Pheromone that Rau had despised all his life.

In sex with Lee Hyun, Pheromone was a delicate second language.

He could tell Lee Hyun with Pheromones, that he loved him fearfully.

Lee Hyun’s Pheromone clearly told Rau, too. That he loved him. That he felt his love.

Lee Hyun himself may not have been aware of the movement of his Pheromones, but his instincts were revealing his Pheromones to Rau without any concealment.

That Lee Hyun, my only Diamond Dust, is living as a Beta. In this distant place, 9,000 km away from me.

Lau Wikun’s hand, which had been flicking ash, stopped for a while above the ashtray.

And just as it was about to move again after a long time.

Drrrrk. Drrrrk.

Lau Wikun, who was slowly bringing the cigarette to his lips, paused. His cell phone rang in his inside pocket. It was Manager Han.

He briefly calculated the time in Korea and connected the call.

“Yeah. What’s up?”

[I call on the weekend and that’s the first thing you say?]

“Sunday’s almost over, I was wondering if there was something urgent…”

[I’m at Shushu Studio with Choi In-woo. I thought of you and called.]

“Ah… is that so?”

[We’re about to move to have dinner. Wanna come?]

When he was in Paris, Manager Han or other people called quite often. He didn’t want to lie every time, so he often didn’t answer, but he couldn’t do that every time.

“Thanks for the invite… but I’m good.”

[Why? Where are you now?]

Lau Wikun’s hand flicking ash became anxious at Manager Han’s question. If he said he was at home, they might say they were coming over.

“I’m out. I’m out somewhere.”

It wasn’t a lie.

[Out where? In the countryside?]

“Yeah, in the countryside. I probably won’t be back until late at night.”

[Is that so? Then there’s no choice.]

If you keep pushing us away like that, we might not invite you later, Choi In-woo’s threatening voice came from over the phone. Thanks to that, he was able to laugh awkwardly.

[But where do you always go every weekend these days?]

“You told me not to just stay at home. I’m trying to get some fresh air.”

[Well… that’s better. Where in the countryside? The call sounds really far away.]

“Is it because my phone’s not in good condition? Have a good dinner, see you at Phantom tomorrow.”

He hurried and ended the call, pretending to have something urgent to do.

Manager Han seemed to be probing a bit persistently today, but it seemed like he had avoided it well. His stalking and lying skills were improving day by day.

There was no particular reason for keeping his trips to Paris a secret. He just wanted to prevent the people around him from letting their imaginations run wild with this one fact.

Lau Wikun knew very well that they wanted him and Lee Hyun to get back together. He was grateful for that.

But there were many sensitive and complex parts that were difficult to explain to them. Delicate exchanges of emotions that only Lau Wikun and Lee Hyun, the parties involved in the relationship, could know.

He didn’t want any speculation or premature celebrations right now. This was the punishment Lee Hyun had given, and he wanted to bear this weight entirely alone.

Lau Wikun, who had been drinking coffee, put it down, stubbed out the shortened cigarette, and picked up the cigarette pack again. His eyes suddenly narrowed as he brought a new cigarette to his lips.

“I can’t keep staying if I can’t produce results. I’m also conscious of it, and it’s stressful… I’m looking for other ways.”

English with a strong German accent. It was a familiar voice. Lau Wikun slowly raised his head.

A man with his hair tied up to his shoulders, frowning, and walking quickly past the cafe.

It was Ben, an artist belonging to The Hands.

He was thoroughly checking The Hands’ website, which introduced the affiliated artists, every time it was updated. He wanted to know what kind of people they were, since they were colleagues living with Lee Hyun. He even knew the faces of all the office staff as well as the affiliated artists, as he was monitoring The Hands’ common entrance every weekend.

The man’s expression and gait seemed hasty and anxious, as if something wasn’t going his way.

In Lau Wikun’s memory, the man was always frivolous when he was with his colleagues. He was the type to step back from everything, act nonchalantly, avoid serious conversations, and be playful. But even such a man seemed to have his worries. He just didn’t confide in people.

As far as Lau Wikun knew, that man named Ben hadn’t released a work for several months.

He had seen many artists fall into slumps while running the gallery. Some artists overcame it and produced better works, but that was not always the case. If it wasn’t a temporary slump but the inspiration to create something had completely run out, it was sadly difficult to recover.

The world Lee Hyun had entered was so cold and harsh. It was a battlefield where monsters with both talent and effort were competing. If they couldn’t continue to showcase noteworthy works, they would be immediately ignored.

The art world today was as rapidly changing as the fashion industry, which is often considered to have a fast pace of change. Many new stars appeared, and just as many were pushed out. There were also many artists who left on their own because their mentality couldn’t withstand it, even though they still had talent.

Lau Wikun, watching the man’s back as he crossed the bridge leading to Quai de la Mégisserie and moved away towards the opposite side of the canal, let out a heavy sigh.

It was bitter but unavoidable. The Hands would also be trying to help their affiliated artists overcome their slumps. He stubbed out the briefly smoked cigarette in the ashtray. His mouth tasted bitter.

As he picked up the glass to finish the remaining coffee, something flickered in his vision. His gaze inadvertently fell on a white object lying on the floor under the chair. The object, which he thought was a pebble, was an eraser.

“……”

Lau Wikun picked it up.

It was a product of Faber-Castell, which Lee Hyun favored.

Traces of use where the paper packaging surrounding the edge had been peeled off and the four sides had been evenly rounded. It was exactly like Lee Hyun’s habit. It seemed he had dropped it while putting things in or taking them out of his pencil case.

Like someone who had found a jewel on a deserted night street, Lau Wikun clenched it tightly, as if afraid someone would see him. His clenched fist unknowingly went to his left chest, to his heart.

His heart was racing at the accidental luck.

It was a lucky day. He was able to see Lee Hyun’s new side, playing with the dog, and thanks to that, he saw him smile a lot. And to get a piece that had fallen from Lee Hyun. He was grateful to Lee Hyun for making the mistake of dropping the eraser.

He shoved the hand clutching the eraser into his trench coat pocket and finished his coffee.

Even if they couldn’t be together, he wanted to stay a little closer to Lee Hyun’s side.

He didn’t want to go back to Seoul.

■ ■ ■

The flight he had booked to Seoul was scheduled to depart at 1 PM Paris time.

It was the last flight that would allow him to barely make it to Phantom by 10 AM. He had to leave the 19th arrondissement by at least 11 AM to board the plane without rushing.

He was planning to leave after capturing Lee Hyun’s appearance as he returned home from his morning walk. But for some reason, it wasn’t easy to leave in front of The Hands that day. Just 10 more minutes, just 10 more minutes… Then it became 11:30 AM. 30 minutes to Charles de Gaulle Airport. It was really time to leave now.

But just as he was about to turn the steering wheel, Lee Hyun reappeared.

Lau Wikun had no choice but to take his hand off the steering wheel.

Lee Hyun, wearing the same clothes as in the morning, was with several colleagues. It was a group of six or seven people, including Baek Yooni and her girlfriend, and Ben, whom he had seen in the morning. They were probably all going out for lunch together.

The group, mostly made up of people in their 20s, was boisterous, excited about their Sunday outing.

When his colleagues made silly jokes, Lee Hyun just looked at them and smiled. Within that group, Lee Hyun looked like a college student of his age. Diligently working towards his dreams, worrying about his career path, and spending time with his friends on weekends… A diligent and ordinary twenty-three-year-old.

The way he had his hands in his coat pockets, the ordinary but stylish jeans, the small and slender face with neat features that looked like they had been delicately drawn with ink. And on top of that, the introverted and shy smile that occasionally appeared.

“Ugh…”

Lau Wikun groaned and hunched over. His emotions were so overwhelming that he actually felt pain in his chest.

He knew the happiness of having once possessed that loveliness.

The privilege of being able to hug him, stand by his side, touch his cheeks and lips, and enjoy his Pheromones.

Someone in the group bent down to tie their shoelaces, and Ben jumped over their back like a vaulting horse. Lee Hyun shook his head as if he couldn’t help it, but smiled brightly, revealing his teeth. The laughter of the young group floated like colorful balloons in the leisurely Sunday alley.

Lee Hyun’s smile, which he gave to others and while looking at others, gripped and twisted Lau Wikun’s heart. He swallowed the pain and barely opened his mouth.

“Are you happy?”

It was a small, whispered voice.

He didn’t know whether he wanted Lee Hyun to be happy here, or to be tormented by longing and look for him every night. Perhaps it was a question for Lau Wikun himself.

He wanted to jump out of the driver’s seat and call him right away.

Lee Hyun! If he called, he would stop and turn around. And then, with a smile that was several times brighter than the one he had shown to his colleagues, a smile that seemed to fill his entire face and heart, he would run towards him.

He would hug that Lee Hyun tightly, inhale the scent of Diamond Dust that only he could enjoy, and confess his true feelings.

He was completely captivated by the thought that all problems would be solved so easily in an instant.

But there was no way he could dare to do such a thing.

If he appeared in front of Lee Hyun now, he would definitely not be able to treat him harshly. It wasn’t because they no longer loved each other that they had broken up. He might be filled with tears, a mixture of hatred and longing, resentment and desire, and hug him.

But was that really the way Lee Hyun wanted to reconnect?

Was that really why Lee Hyun had come all the way here to endure, for such a vague reunion?

A clear knot was needed. And it had to be Lee Hyun who tied that knot, and who cut off the remaining scraps after tying the knot, declaring the end of time. Only then could we bury the past in the past and move forward together into the future.

The best he could do now was to respect Lee Hyun’s choice.

And to wait.

Lee Hyun turned the corner with his colleagues. The tail of light that had been illuminating the alley seemed to have disappeared with him. Suddenly, the alley was dark.

It was so hard to breathe, as if Lee Hyun had taken all the oxygen away.

Lau Wikun collapsed, burying his forehead on the steering wheel.

A short honk sounded in the deserted alley where most of the shops had their shutters down. It was like a heavy scream.

■ ■ ■

Across the canal, Lee Hyun’s favorite cafe could be seen between the parked boats.

He and his colleagues would definitely appear along that road and return to The Hands. To see them on their way back, it was safer to wait at a slight distance. Lau Wikun waited for Lee Hyun to come on the other side of the canal.

While the call to Manager Han was connecting, Lau Wikun kept glancing at the clock on the car’s tablet.

The 1 PM flight had already been canceled. He kept dragging out the time, saying just a little more, just a little more, and it was already almost 2 PM. It was evening in Seoul, heading towards 8 PM.

There was a flight to Incheon at 4:30 PM. He was thinking of taking that flight for now.

[Oh, it’s me.]

Manager Han’s leisurely voice, befitting a Sunday evening, was heard.

“Were you resting?”

[I’m lazing around at home. Ah… I guess I drank too much yesterday. I still have a hangover.]

“I figured.”

Lau Wikun chuckled, keeping his eyes fixed on the front. He didn’t expect that hanging out with Choi In-woo and Shushu would end with just dinner.

[Choi In-woo is one thing, but when did Shushu’s drinking get so good? She drank two bottles of wine by herself? CEO Ryu, have you seen Shushu drink that much?]

“It’s been a long time since I’ve had a drink with her.”

[Hasn’t it been a long time since CEO Ryu had a drink with anyone these days? Huh?]

The sound of an awkward laugh, out of guilt, seemed to be heard over the phone.

[You’re trying to laugh it off. Anyway, wow… Jung Se-in has become a heavy drinker, hanging out with Choi In-woo so often these days.]

Jung Se-in was the Korean pronunciation of Shushu’s Hong Kong name, Zheng Xiuyan. Just like Lau Wikun was known as CEO Ryu in Korea.

[Ah, but why did you call?]

“About tomorrow, is it possible to come to work in the afternoon?”

[The exhibition preparations were all finished last week. It’s okay. Why? Are you still in the countryside?]

“Yeah, that’s how it turned out.”

[Did something… happen?]

Manager Han’s question seemed worried, and also seemed to be subtly probing something.

“It’s not that. I was just sorting out my thoughts. I was thinking of spending today here and getting up and moving in the morning.”

[That’s a good idea. Clear your head a little more and come up slowly.]

“Thanks. You must be tired, rest more. I’ll hang up.”

Just as Lau Wikun was about to end the call, Manager Han hurriedly stopped him.

[CEO Ryu.]

“Yeah?”

[You can just rest tomorrow. You don’t have to push yourself.]

Unlike the beginning of the call, which was full of playfulness, Manager Han’s voice was serious. It was a voice that felt like sympathy for a man who couldn’t escape the pain of a broken heart.

Who would have known that the day would come when he would make the people around him worry about something like this.

No, no one had expected that Lau Wikun would fall into such a deep love that he couldn’t come to his senses.

Lau Wikun laughed silently at the thought that life was so unpredictable.

“No. I have to go out in the afternoon. Thanks.”

After ending the call, he hurriedly booked the 4:30 PM flight. Even while doing so, he didn’t forget to check the situation across the canal.

When he decided to go to Paris, he had made two promises to himself.

First, he would never leave any visual records of Lee Hyun’s appearance, such as photos or videos.

Second, he would not get too caught up in this and interfere with his work in Seoul.

He had been keeping them well so far, but this was the first time he had extended his stay in Paris by canceling the flight he had booked. For some reason, he couldn’t take his feet off the ground today.

It might be because he didn’t see Lee Hyun as much as usual because he spent almost all his time yesterday signing the apartment and car contracts.

“You have to leave when it’s exactly 2 o’clock. Extending the time any more than this is a violation of the rules.”

Lau Wikun muttered sternly to himself, his fingertips tapping anxiously on the steering wheel.

If he broke the rules, he would obviously want to throw everything away, including Phantom, and settle down in Paris. Even now, his true feelings were that he wanted to do that. He was just holding back because he thought such a man would not be loved by Lee Hyun.

Lau Wikun, searching for the cigarette pack while keeping his eyes fixed on the other side of the canal, dropped it at his feet. He flailed his arm to grab the small box and raised his head, and as if it were a lie, Lee Hyun and his group appeared at the end of the bridge in the meantime.

“You don’t give me a chance to let my guard down.”

Lau Wikun threw the cigarette pack on the trench coat on the passenger seat and took off his sunglasses. While hanging the legs of the sunglasses on the neckline of his V-neck knit, he continued to observe the movements of the group with his eyes.

A smile spread across his face as he found Lee Hyun with his hands in his coat pockets.

What could he do but be happy as long as he was in his sight?

It didn’t seem like they’d gone far. It seemed they were coming from a meal on the northwest side of the canal across the bridge.

The group was still boisterous. Baek Yooni and her girlfriend were holding hands, unlike before, and Baek Yooni held a small bouquet in her other hand. It was a simple bouquet made of three or four purple cornflowers. Even from this distance, the colors were very vivid. Probably a gift from her girlfriend.

They looked happy. They pushed and pulled each other’s hands, walking down the street as if dancing. Seo Yi-hyun, with both hands in his coat pockets, followed them slowly.

Lau’s brow furrowed. It wasn’t because of the November afternoon sunlight pouring in through the car windshield.

As if watching the climax of a movie where conflict was escalating, he clasped his hands in front of his lips. His chest felt tight, and he had to take several deep breaths. The breaths sounded more like sighs.

As the group completely crossed the bridge and headed north toward ‘The Hands,’ Seo Yi-hyun’s pace fell further and further behind.

Then he backtracked toward the spot he had just passed.

Seo Yi-hyun stopped completely in front of a gift shop. The gray-tinged, dark mint-colored sign and finishing materials gave it a vintage feel.

Seo Yi-hyun stared intently at one spot inside the display window. Even though he enjoyed observing his surroundings, it was rare for him to show so much interest in the merchandise being sold.

What could it be? What had caught Seo Yi-hyun’s eye?

Lau leaned his upper body as far as he could over the steering wheel. But no matter how much he frowned and concentrated, he couldn’t see inside the display window.

As if completely captivated, Seo Yi-hyun stood motionless in front of it.

The group, realizing that Seo Yi-hyun had fallen behind, stopped about ten meters ahead and looked back. They seemed to be raising their arms to call Seo Yi-hyun. Seo Yi-hyun looked at them too. But he kept glancing back at the inside of the display window.

Even as he completely left the front of the store, Seo Yi-hyun’s face was still turned toward the display window, as if he had lingering regrets. He looked like someone leaving reluctantly. It reminded Rau of the puppy who had gazed endlessly at Seo Yi-hyun as he left for the park that morning.

“What did you like so much?”

Lau was angry at his own situation, unable to give Seo Yi-hyun the thing that had interested him so much. He wanted to rub his face roughly with both hands in misery, but he couldn’t take his eyes off Seo Yi-hyun.

Was it just his imagination? Seo Yi-hyun’s shoulders seemed heavier as he rejoined the group. The way he raised the collar of his coat, pulled his chin in, and lowered his head made his listless walk seem like it wasn’t just because of the cold.

Was there something he wanted? He wasn’t the type of kid to get sulky just because he couldn’t have something….

As the ‘The Hands’ group disappeared into the alley, Lau put his sunglasses back on and started the car. The temperature was low, but the sunlight was intense. It was almost dangerous to drive without sunglasses.

Anxious, Lau’s hands kept gripping the steering wheel tighter. He parked the car in front of the gift shop and hurried out, almost jumping out.

Lau also stopped in the same spot where Seo Yi-hyun had stood. It was as if he were an enthusiastic fan who had gone to the real location of a favorite movie and was reenacting the scene exactly.

“……”

As if bewitched by something, Lau slowly pulled down his sunglasses.

His gaze was fixed on a large doll standing on the right edge of the quaintly decorated display window. Just like Seo Yi-hyun’s had been.

Standing there was a model of the rabbit from ‘Alice in Wonderland.’

The rabbit, dressed in a waistcoat and jacket and holding a pocket watch, seemed to be a fairly elaborate, high-quality item. It was also quite large, about the size of a four- or five-year-old child.

The picture that Im Morae had put on the wall of the beach club in Bali.

And now, the picture that Lau cherished on the bedside table next to his bed.

In that picture, Seo Yi-hyun’s Lau Wikun was the watch rabbit leading Alice to Wonderland.

The feeling that Seo Yi-hyun must have felt, unable to leave this place, rose from his feet and seemed to swallow him whole.

“You idiot. Forget about that rabbit.”

Lau’s hand, holding the sunglasses, tightened, and veins popped out on the back of his hand.

“He hurt you.”

The sunglasses felt like they would break in his hand.

Next to the rabbit was an Alice model in a blue dress and white apron. Alice’s curious, large eyes seemed to resemble Seo Yi-hyun’s.

Lau, covering his face with his large hands, whispered as if collapsing.

“No, please don’t forget.”

As if Seo Yi-hyun were right in front of him. As if pleading directly to him.

It was really time to leave now.

Should he buy the watch rabbit model and give it to Seo Yi-hyun when he could stand by his side again someday? He even thought about that.

But Lau left the front of the store as he was and got into the car.

He didn’t know when someone would buy that model, but until then, he hoped that every time Seo Yi-hyun passed by this place, he would see the rabbit and think of him.

Rather than forgetting me and living happily, I want you to be hurt by longing for me. So that you’ll want to come back to me.

He decided to accept that his love was only that much.

While driving toward Charles de Gaulle Airport, Lau left the car window open. The wind blowing into the interior was cold, but he couldn’t help it because he felt suffocated.

A haenyeo can usually dive to a depth of 10m for about 1 minute. After diving, they float to the surface and exhale, making a high-pitched whistling sound like a flute. Sumbisori.

A precious moment to exhale the long-held breath and inhale a new one.

Life in Seoul, so to speak, was a dive for Lau. And the time in Paris, where he could see Seo Yi-hyun’s face from even a little closer, was like Sumbisori.

He passed a sign saying that Charles de Gaulle was 10km away.

It was time to dive again.

While calmly watching the front through his sunglasses, he kept rolling something in his hand.

It was a Faber-Castell eraser.

■ ■ ■

Paris, a few days before Christmas.

A monumental snowfall was blanketing the entire city of Paris in white. The sleet that had begun to fall early in the morning had turned into snowflakes the size of a child’s fist by noon. After noon, the snow had piled up on the streets so much that feet sank deep into it.

This kind of heavy snowfall was very rare in Paris.

The most excited, of course, were the children. It seemed like there were so many children living in the 19th arrondissement that every alley was occupied by them.

Snow had piled up on Lau’s sedan, which was waiting for Seo Yi-hyun in front of ‘The Hands.’ But there was no need to brush the snow off separately. As soon as it reached a certain thickness, small people would come and sweep the snow off the front and rear hoods.

That snow became material for snowball fights, and it also became the first starting point for rolling snowmen. Sometimes it became white pollen sprinkled on a friend’s head.

Thanks to the various children of various ages playing in various ways, the time spent waiting for Seo Yi-hyun’s appearance was not boring. This was also like a scene from a movie.

While waiting for Seo Yi-hyun, the world seen from the driver’s seat was like a drive-in theater in itself. Lau sipped warm coffee from time to time and chuckled.

Children who were still too young to play alone were with their guardians. Even a toddler who had just started to waddle, closer to a baby than a child, went out into the street fully armed.

Hands wearing ridiculously small gloves touched the snow on the ground. The small body, squatting awkwardly, looked unstable because it couldn’t balance itself well yet. The child’s guardian was restless beside him, afraid that he would fall forward at any moment.

A warm smile appeared on Lau’s eyes and lips as he leaned on the windowsill and looked out at the scene.

It was a smile that transformed the scenery in front of him into his own happiness, while falling into sweet fantasies.

As if a miracle had happened before Christmas, the world suddenly seemed full of generous hope and happiness. For the sole reason that it had snowed.

Knock knock.

The unexpected knock startled Lau. Lau, who was lifting his tumbler to drink coffee, turned to the driver’s seat window with a puzzled expression.

A girl was standing there. She was about six years old, with her face barely visible above the window.

Lau lowered the window for now.

“Hello?”

“Hello.”

The child also raised her small hand, wearing wool gloves, and greeted Lau.

“What’s wrong? Is there anything I can help you with?”

“I have a question.”

“Oh… okay.”

The child took another step toward the window and lowered her voice.

“Mister, are you a detective?”

“Huh?”

“You’re always watching from inside the car here. You’re a detective, right?”

“Oh….”

It was hard to betray the child’s eyes, which were full of certainty and anticipation. It was clear that she would be disappointed if he said he wasn’t a detective.

Lau put the tumbler he was holding back in the cup holder. And after pretending to look around with a cautious and secretive look, he gestured for the child to come closer. And, like the child had done, he lowered his voice and whispered.

“How did you know I was in the car?”

“I’ve seen you get out of the car a few times. I thought it was an empty car, but I was surprised when you got out.”

“Hmm…. I see.”

Lau nodded and said solemnly, putting his index finger in front of his lips.

“But it’s a secret that I’m a detective.”

“I know! Because the criminal mustn’t find out!”

With her big brown eyes shining, the child clenched her gloved hands and looked up at Lau. The detective wasn’t exactly chasing a criminal, but that was a trivial detail that didn’t matter to the child.

“You know a lot about detectives, don’t you?”

“I’ve read several Sherlock Holmes books.”

She looked smart, but Sherlock Holmes? It seemed like a pretty difficult book for a six-year-old to read. Lau widened his eyes as if impressed and asked.

“You can read Sherlock Holmes?”

The child sighed with her small lips. As if to say, ‘Don’t you know that?’

“Sherlock Holmes for children. I’m a child now, so I can’t read the ones for adults.”

“Ah, right. I guess so.”

Lau managed to hold back his laughter at the child’s serious attitude.

“But when I grow up, I’ll read the real Sherlock Holmes too.”

“Yeah, I think you’ll be able to read it soon?”

The child smiled brightly, as if pleased. It was a smile that he couldn’t help but smile back at.

“Then, can you keep this a secret between detectives?”

He could tell that the expression ‘a secret between detectives’ had captured the child’s heart at once. In the large, unsuspecting eyes with clear outlines, there was a moment of intense trembling.

“I’ll keep it a secret from Louise, from Alain, and from Mom and Dad too.”

“Amazing. You’re very trustworthy.”

While seriously agreeing with the child’s words, Lau was swept up in a very new feeling.

Until now, he had never had the opportunity to be close to a child, and if he had to put it bluntly, he had felt that they were difficult and troublesome. Even though he loved Seo Yi-hyun enough to lose his mind, he had only focused on keeping him by his side, and he had never even imagined having a child with him.

But for the first time, vaguely, he imagined Seo Yi-hyun and his child. Then he soon smiled crookedly and jeered at himself.

Imagining a child when he’s been kicked out and banned from approaching. What a pipe dream.

“It’s sad to have a secret from your best friend, but Louise or Alain might accidentally tell someone else, right?”

“Alain doesn’t talk.”

“Hmm?”

“I tell Alain everything, but Alain never tells anyone.”

“Really?”

“Because he’s a dog.”

“Ah….”

Lau looked at the sky with narrow eyes and nodded. Like someone who had gained a deep understanding.

After promising to keep it a secret from the dog Alain in the name of the detective, the child returned to her friends. Leaving behind a greeting of ‘Joyeux Noël!

.’

The snow that had melted on the child’s red wool hat sparkled. Lau chuckled, thinking she looked like a little fairy.

The red-hatted child rushed off to the next alley with her friends, and not long after, Seo Yi-hyun appeared at the front door of ‘The Hands.’ Perhaps because of the snow, his morning walk had also been skipped, so this was the first time Lau had seen Seo Yi-hyun today.

Lau leaned forward nervously.

Seo Yi-hyun was wearing a slightly thicker coat than usual, but he wasn’t wearing a scarf or gloves. Since entering the full swing of winter, Seo Yi-hyun had never worn a scarf or gloves.

No matter how much higher the average winter temperature in Paris was than in Seoul, winter was still winter. Parisians also wore thin clothes, but they took good care of their winter accessories.

Lau’s face furrowed as he watched Seo Yi-hyun’s bare hands pulling on the iron handle of ‘The Hands.’ It felt like his own hands were freezing.

“Are you doing that on purpose to hurt me?”

He knew that wasn’t the case, but he said it out of frustration.

Seo Yi-hyun, who had stopped walking and looked up at the sky, spread his palm and measured the snow falling on it. To Lau, even that was like a scene from a movie.

“Couldn’t you at least use an umbrella.”

Unlike Lau’s wish, Seo Yi-hyun decided to just get snowed on instead of going back to his room to get an umbrella.

When he had called Yooni before, he had suggested that he wear winter accessories like a scarf or gloves, but it was no use.

Of course, Lau didn’t mention that he had seen Seo Yi-hyun in Paris in person. He had just asked if Seo Yi-hyun was dressing warmly and naturally led the conversation.

[He says he can’t because it’s frustrating.] Even though someone gave him a gift, it doesn’t work.]

That was what Yooni had told him.

‘Really? Someone… gave him another gift?’

[Seo Yi-hyun is popular, you know. Not just as a romantic interest, but there are a lot of people who like Seo Yi-hyun as a person.]

That’s right. Why wouldn’t there be? It was a situation he had expected and prepared for. But even so, Lau’s back was covered in cold sweat while listening to the news.

‘Maybe, he’s even getting confessions… or something?’

[I don’t think I should say any more. I feel like… a spy.]

Yooni hesitated and answered in a troubled tone. Lau nodded and agreed.

‘Okay, I guess so. This is enough. Thank you.’

He said it calmly, but in fact, he had spent more than a week tossing and turning, unable to sleep, thinking that someone who liked Seo Yi-hyun was around him.

It’s over now, we broke up. ―Neither Lau nor Seo Yi-hyun used such firm expressions to explain their changed relationship. So the people around them couldn’t ask directly.

Choi In-woo and Shushu roughly knew the inside story. They knew that Lau was a ‘Ghost’ and what he had done to Seo Yi-hyun. But Manager Han, Baek Yooni, and Kwon Juhan only vaguely guessed that the two were no longer in the same relationship as before, and they had no idea why.

They were still both caring about each other and loving each other, so what was the reason for this?

They were frustrated, but they couldn’t dig too deeply. They understood that romance was a much more complex and sensitive event than a third party watching from the outside, and that love was several times more complex than romance.

Seo Yi-hyun, who had come down the stairs, started walking toward the canal.

The temperature was low, the wind was cold, and it was snowing, so the road wasn’t good. Where was he going? He was carrying a backpack, so it didn’t seem like his destination was nearby. Curious, Lau slowly drove the car and followed him.

Seo Yi-hyun, who had passed his favorite cafe and the gift shop with the watch rabbit, crossed the bridge.

The road was bad, but Seo Yi-hyun’s walking speed was a little slower than usual because he was observing the snowy scenery. But because all the cars were crawling because of the heavy snow, it wasn’t too difficult to slowly follow Seo Yi-hyun by car.

A smile crept onto Lau’s face as he looked at Seo Yi-hyun’s back, with his hands in his coat pockets and looking around at the scenery. How could someone’s back of the head be so lovable?

At the same time, he felt bad because his long neck and nape, exposed above the collar, looked cold. If only he could put his arm around him. If only he could melt his red, frozen earlobes with the warmth of his own hands….

A bistro with a blue and white striped awning

He could see it just across the bridge. A bistro with a red awning faced the house, separated by an alley. Lee Hyun turned into the alley between them.

He’s taking the Metro Line 7.

It wasn’t difficult anymore to roughly predict Lee Hyun’s movements by observing his route. He sped up to overtake him. His plan was to get to the exit Lee Hyun used first.

As he passed Lee Hyun, he looked at him through the side mirror.

A face meticulously drawn as if with ink on Rice paper.

In the mirror, he was quickly receding into the distance.

He imagined turning the steering wheel right then and there, stopping the car, and revealing himself in front of him. Lee Hyun, it’s Christmas. If he awkwardly smiled with that excuse, how would he react?

Resting his elbow on the windowsill, Rau touched his lower lip and gave a bitter smile. It was just a useless fantasy.

Joining the main road, Rau made a U-turn towards the exit Lee Hyun used, and Lee Hyun turned the corner of the alley around that time. Rau’s car slowly started moving towards Lee Hyun.

Squeak, screech.

The wipers repeatedly cleared the snowflakes falling on the windshield. With each swipe, Lee Hyun’s figure came three or four steps closer.

Lee Hyun descending the stairs of the metro exit, and Rau in the sedan. The distance between the two gradually narrowed and then crossed. Then, they moved away again.

Lee Hyun bumped into a man coming up from the station. He briefly apologized and then went back down the stairs. However, Lee Hyun didn’t notice the man who couldn’t leave easily and kept looking back.

Rau, who had temporarily stopped at the traffic light with the hazard lights on, watched the whole scene through the rearview and side mirrors.

He briefly thought about tailing him like a real detective or cop. But it was too dangerous. He’s probably going to his usual art supply store in the Marais district….

Once Lee Hyun went out, the stalker had nothing to do.

Rau, driving around the neighborhood, felt like having a drink. He returned to the apartment, parked the car, and headed towards the canal on foot.

He decided to wait for Lee Hyun’s return somewhere. He knew exactly where the perfect place was. He quickened his pace, hunching his shoulders against the increasingly chilly weather. He was worried about Lee Hyun, who had gone out wearing light clothes.

“Bonjour!”

As he entered the store, the tall waiter recognized Rau and raised a hand in a friendly greeting.

“Bonjour.”

Rau responded simply.

It was a bistro that Lee Hyun almost never passed by, yet it was diagonally across from Lee Hyun’s favorite café and the entrance to The Hands’ alley. It was the perfect location to wait for Lee Hyun without fear of being caught. It was inevitable that it became Rau’s regular spot, and in the meantime, he became acquainted with the waiter.

Luckily, there was one window seat left. Rau took off his coat and settled there.

The Christmas tree had already been occupying the center of the store since mid-November, and carols were playing inside. This time of year, similar scenes unfolded everywhere in the world.

“It’s been so long since we’ve had such heavy snow in Paris, right?”

The waiter said in a friendly manner, handing over the menu. He was convinced that Rau lived nearby.

Rau nodded, looking at the scenery outside the window following the waiter’s gaze.

“Yeah, it’s rare.”

“You won’t be in Paris for Christmas, will you?”

“……”

At the confident tone, he raised his chin and looked up at the waiter.

“You speak a little French, but you’re more comfortable using English. You’re not Parisian. Usually, people go back home where their families are for Christmas.”

“Ah… no. I’m planning to be in Paris this Christmas.”

Rau shook his head as he opened the menu and replied.

“Ooh. Your lover must be in Paris?”

The waiter said with a lewd expression and voice, teasingly. Then, he looked down at Rau’s face and nodded as if agreeing with himself.

“Well, you must have a lover.”

Rau, who chuckled at his affability, suddenly looked out the window again. The street that Lee Hyun always passed by had become a familiar sight to Rau as well. This Christmas, he would be here. With him. By his side. Even if he didn’t know it.

“That’s right. I want to be with him, so I’m staying in Paris.”

“I see.”

He wanted to feel like he was Lee Hyun’s lover, even if it was just by saying this to someone he didn’t know well.

The waiter, who had taken the order and collected the menu, added as if he had just remembered something before leaving.

“Oh, one more thing.”

“……”

“I always thought you couldn’t be Parisian because you always give generous tips.”

Rau chuckled at the waiter’s playful expression with a wink.

He spent a relaxing time drinking wine for the first time in a while.

The excited atmosphere a few days before Christmas. The accumulated snow and the falling snow.

The warm light of the bulbs decorating the tree and the carols.

Things that had been meaningless before, things he had looked at with indifference, made Rau sentimental. What if he could share all of this with Lee Hyun? With that one wish alone.

Paris in heavy snow was beautiful. Even though it wasn’t a view with the Eiffel Tower, the Champs-Élysées, or the Seine in the background. No, this corner of the 19th arrondissement was more beautiful than any glamorous place in Paris right now. Because it was the place where Lee Hyun would return.

What he had told the waiter was not a lie. Rau was actually planning to stay here until after Christmas.

Manager Han had given him a week off as Phantom was undergoing a major interior renovation.

“Take a break. Do what you want…. Go wherever you want to go. Don’t spend twenty-five hours round trip on the plane every weekend.”

She knew. She knew that Rau was flying back and forth to Paris every weekend.

Kwon Juhan went even further.

“Go and take him back.”

He had said that with a challenging look. Go and take Lee Hyun back. He was the one who wanted Phantom to be one forever more than anyone else, the one who had dreamed a Peter Pan-like dream. The changed relationship between Rau and Lee Hyun might have been a wound to Kwon Juhan equivalent to his parents’ divorce.

Take him back….

Rau poured more red wine into his empty glass and smiled painfully with a deflated sound.

If he had been taken away by someone, he would have tried to get him back by any means. But Lee Hyun hadn’t been stolen. He had lost him himself. He couldn’t blame anyone, and he didn’t know who to challenge.

He could only wait for Lee Hyun’s forgiveness.

Michael Bublé’s ‘The Christmas Song’ ended and a new song just started. It was ‘Santa Claus Is Coming To Town’ sung by Frank Sinatra.

Come to think of it, it had been a year since he started waiting for Lee Hyun.

Rau frowned without realizing it at the memory of last Christmas.

Last Christmas, when he had to clean up the mess he had made in New York, where everything he had prepared for Lee Hyun remained intact, was a terrible memory.

What he had prepared for Lee Hyun?

No, it was a trap to keep him from leaving me.

What would this Christmas be like?

If the past year of waiting had been fruitful, then the white-bearded old man riding a sleigh pulled by reindeer would give me a small reward too.

Rau covered his face with one hand and chuckled inside. He shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it.

It was really an unlike-him imagination.

Around the time he was drinking his third glass of wine, Lee Hyun appeared on the bridge.

Rau remained seated and watched Lee Hyun. He silently followed his movements with his eyes, sipping and swallowing the wine as if watching a movie.

In the darkening late afternoon scenery, Lee Hyun’s back view with a backpack hurried along. Even so, he didn’t forget to stop briefly in front of Mr. Rabbit. As if to say hello to the doll.

Seo Yi-hyun, who couldn’t just pass by Mr. Rabbit.

That alone was like a small reward from Santa Claus to Rau. It was enough.

As the sun completely set and the heavy snow that had been pouring all day subsided, Rau left the store. Heat rose from his wine-warmed body, and the air touching his cheeks felt rather cool.

After crossing the bridge, he invariably stopped briefly in front of the gift shop.

Mr. Rabbit, Alice, and the adorable tea set.

Inside the window decorated with Christmas ornaments, they seemed to emit a more mysterious light than usual. It felt as if fantastic things would unfold before his eyes any moment.

Since when have I become someone so influenced by the Christmas atmosphere? Rau chuckled, stuck his hands in his coat pockets, and turned away. But he didn’t dislike the feeling.

Carols were also playing from Lee Hyun’s favorite café. The people eating, drinking, laughing, and chatting inside the café where light leaked out all looked happy. He didn’t envy their happiness.

Because he was happier now, loving and waiting for Lee Hyun, than he had been in the past when he didn’t know or love Seo Yi-hyun.

Just as he turned the corner, he inadvertently glanced to the side and noticed that Ben from The Hands was following him. Strictly speaking, he wasn’t following him, but he was just going to his own destination as well.

While pretending to browse the store’s stall, Ben passed Rau.

Thump, thump. Ben, who had shaken off the snow by stomping his feet on the stairs, disappeared inside the front door of The Hands. At this moment, Ben was the most enviable man in the world to Rau. He could return to the same place as Lee Hyun and knock on his door anytime.

The street corner. In front of the eyeglass store that was closed for the night, Rau looked up at the windows of The Hands for a long time. Judging by the fact that most of the rooms were dark, they were probably all gathered in the living room on the second floor.

I thought I wanted him to be in pain from longing for me rather than forgetting me and having a good time. Now, he was glad that there were people by Lee Hyun’s side.

He was glad that Rau himself, not Lee Hyun, was the one looking up at the windows from which light was leaking out from the snowy street corner. Sincerely.

He imagined Lee Hyun spending a boisterous and warm year-end surrounded by people. With a warm smile, Rau turned around. Should he find a stoic bar somewhere without any of the soft Christmas atmosphere and drink more? He walked slowly towards the apartment with that thought.

He stopped on the street to slow down his pace of returning home and took out a cigarette pack. He cupped his left hand around the end of the cigarette to block the wind in order to light it.

Tap, tap. The sound of footsteps running through the snowy alley suddenly caught Rau’s attention.

Like foreshadowing in a movie, the footsteps strangely made Rau’s heart flutter.

The footsteps that had been getting closer stopped abruptly nearby. Rau turned his head towards the street corner he had turned away from a little while ago.

“……”

He froze as if he had encountered an angel in a dead end.

His left hand moved on its own and took the cigarette he was holding from his lips.

White breath rose from Lee Hyun’s lips as he gasped for air. He couldn’t believe it.

Should he run away? Should he run away?

He didn’t have any excuses prepared to tell Lee Hyun why he was here.

“To be staking out… aren’t you, too, conspicuous with your looks?”

It wasn’t the expression of looking at a hideous monster or a creepy ghost.

Lee Hyun was smiling brightly, just like he had in his imagination.

As if the painful process of facing the truth and digging into each other had never happened.

As if he had accidentally run into a lover he had been eagerly waiting for.

This was a miracle.

Was he really allowed to approach Lee Hyun and talk to him?

Rau, who had been standing there stiffly, looking at Lee Hyun with the heart of a sinner, wondering if he dared to approach, suddenly started moving without hesitation. He threw away the unlit cigarette and strode, almost ran, towards Lee Hyun. His feet moved first before he could come to a conclusion.

Because Lee Hyun was crying.

He cupped his cheeks and wiped away the tears with his thumb. It was Lee Hyun’s cheek that he had wanted to touch so much.

He looked into Lee Hyun’s tearful eyes that were looking up at him.

His wet eyelashes fluttered, and Lee Hyun’s hand tightly grabbed Rau’s arm that was cupping his cheek.

“Don’t go….”

Lee Hyun’s one word was an absolute command to Rau. He pressed his forehead against Lee Hyun’s forehead and nodded.

“I won’t go anywhere until you tell me to go.”

He would run to him right away if he suddenly wanted to see him on a whim.

And then, if he said he never wanted to see his face again, he would disappear right away.

He was already a body that had promised Lee Hyun that. He was even prepared to repeat that act for the rest of his life.

At the unbelievable miracle, he slowly pulled Lee Hyun closer and hugged him. Lee Hyun’s temple touched his right cheek. He felt Lee Hyun’s breath on his neck. His chest was full of Lee Hyun’s warmth.

Haa….

His eyes closed on their own, and a sigh of relief was exhaled from deep within.

This is not Sumbisori.

It was permission to come up to land completely.

He was holding Lee Hyun, who was telling him not to go, in his arms. Lee Hyun’s two hands were holding him tightly. He kept hugging Lee Hyun’s shoulders, who wasn’t even wearing a coat, tighter and tighter. As if trying to hide him from the eyes of the whole world in his arms.

He was alive now. He felt like he was going to live.