By Zephyria 
After my bewildered heart settled down, I could finally calmly consider what had happened.
Seeing the child sitting there, unable to hide their clumsy feelings and looking embarrassed, I finally understood.
They were complaining that I had called another child after promising to play with me. Thinking that, I was reminded of the child’s age again. Even if they tried to act like an adult, they were too young.
As the child hesitated and didn’t speak, I tried my best to comfort them by wrapping my arm around their shoulder.
“I didn’t mean to go play without you, Senior. Bill, for all his lack of tact, I’ve never seen him treat you badly, so I thought it would be fine to include him.”
“…Mm.”
“It’s not right to push someone out and pull someone else in among friends.”
“…I know. But…”
“Yes. You know?”
“…I wanted to play with just the two of us. I’ve been waiting so long for the exams to be over…”
It was a funny thing to say. I found it strange that such a complaint seemed cute, yet I couldn’t help but laugh. I buried my forehead in the child’s shoulder and laughed for a moment.
Whether from embarrassment or surprise, their stiff shoulder gave off a pleasant scent.
The child couldn’t speak for a while, then finally managed to speak again, their voice strained.
“I’m sorry. I know I’m being difficult with Young Master Ernhardt… I don’t know why I’m acting like this…”
“I see.”
“…”
I knew it was excessive behavior for a friend. But if I were to be strict, I also had my own issues. I had given Rubel so much of my heart and my presence that it was obvious to others.
Children have a knack for sensing who favors them, don’t they?
With that thought, I quietly continued to comfort the child. The child, who had been breathing softly, relaxed their shoulders and leaned into me, so I readily opened my arms and hugged them tightly.
Their black hair, as dark as ink finely ground with care, tickled my cheek.
I patted their underdeveloped shoulders and back, and when they curled up, tickled, I let Rubel go.
Instead, they pestered me to hold their hand, so I offered mine.
Suddenly, my stomach felt a tickle.
I heard that in Ciaran, even men shared romantic feelings. The moment that thought crossed my mind, I snapped back to reality as if doused with cold water.
It was absurd. What impure thoughts was I having about this young, beautiful child?
I quickly cleared my mind.
“…First, we need to go take the exam.”
“Yes. …I’m sorry. I couldn’t even eat because of me…”
“It’s only an hour or two late at most. Right after the exam…”
My hesitation was brief. Seeing Rubel so crestfallen, I had no intention of suggesting we go with other children. I glanced at the child’s hand, still tightly gripping mine.
“We can go to the night market and get some snacks. Just you and me, Senior.”
Rubel nodded without answering. Their flushed cheeks were so beautiful.
Suppressing my awkward feelings, I asked a few questions that might appear on the exam, and Rubel eagerly added explanations.
What the child told me appeared exactly on the exam, and I solved it easily.
❖ ❖ ❖
Perhaps it was because I hadn’t gone hungry since my rebirth, but my stomach felt particularly empty.
Worried about how Rubel must be feeling, I pulled the child in their school uniform into a carriage as soon as we left the exam hall.
On nights when the night market was open, many children went out to play, so there were many coachmen lingering near the academy gates. It was good not to have to wait.
When I asked what they wanted to eat, Rubel immediately listed several familiar restaurants and, with a flushed expression, said, “Let’s go here, let’s go there,” which I found adorable and made me smile again.
It seemed their earlier disappointment had completely vanished. What a relief.
“…Oh, oh. Why are you smiling?”
“No, it’s nothing. You have to choose just one place, don’t you?”
“Where do you like, Young Master Ernhardt?”
“I’m not picky about what I eat… I’d like to try something new.”
“Then let’s go for Owen-style dining. They say it has a lot of vegetables and feels healthy.”
“Let’s do that.”
The carriage stopped by the roadside, a scene now familiar.
I hopped out of the carriage and offered my hand to Rubel. It had become a habit to help Michael and Asdel when getting into carriages.
The other children from the camping class also took it for granted that the child who got out first would help the others, so I didn’t think anything of it.
However, none of them had ever held my hand so tightly that they didn’t want to let go again.
Flustered, I looked up at Rubel’s face. The child hesitated for a moment, then opened their mouth and quietly explained the reason.
“There are too many people. It would be a big problem if I lost you by accident.”
“…Me? You, Senior?”
“Yes. We came all this way, so let’s just hold hands until the restaurant.”
It was strange. Rubel and I were First-rate martial artists. I was capable of easily finding them among the crowd even if I accidentally lost sight of Rubel. Rubel would be the same. Who was I going to lose?
Unable to refuse the child’s plea at the right moment, I walked with them, holding hands.
It was even stranger because the crowd wasn’t so dense that our shoulders would bump. I could hear Rubel’s rapidly beating heart and scan their flushed neck with my eyes.
My clasped hand felt damp and warm. When I loosened my grip, the child tightened their hold on my hand.
Rubel was a well-raised young man.
When it was just the two of us, it was acceptable to pat them, call them cute, and dote on them. Since Rubel was treated like a child, and I liked it that way, I didn’t think much of it.
But the problem was that most couples walking hand-in-hand on crowded streets looked as affectionate as Danbi and his lover. I had never imagined I would be walking down this street like this with this child.
I followed, staring blankly at the back of the child’s head.
Still, it was a relief when we reached the restaurant and they let go of my hand.
The restaurant’s pillars were decorated with carved and brightly painted wooden sculptures, which caught my eye.
I was briefly surprised by the custom of removing shoes before entering a room, which differed from Ciaran culture, but when I saw the square, well-like indentations under the table designed to fit one’s legs, I was astonished.
Sitting on cushions with my legs tucked into the sunken floor felt like sitting on a hard chair. The food that filled the table was neatly portioned for each person.
There were pressed cakes adorned with flowers, and various kinds of vegetables and meat, all cut into uniform shapes and drizzled with a tangy sauce.
Seeing over thirty side dishes, I thought it rivaled the Emperor’s table.
We ate, with me encouraging the child to try this and that, and also being cared for. To avoid wasting food, I ate a few more aromatic herbs that Rubel refused to eat.
Seeing the child eat well made me feel content and happy.
Whether Ciaran people were particularly fond of cinnamon, or if Owen cuisine was always like this, I received a cinnamon-scented sweet tea after the meal.
While the dishes were being cleared, we chatted.
Most of the conversations I had with Rubel were about academy matters. I asked about Wilton Roberts and received answers. Rubel, in turn, asked me about Walter.
“About Senior Orgen.”
“Yes.”
“…Do you think he’s, um, handsome?”
“Pardon?”
It was a sudden question. Even though I could distinguish the faces of Ciaran children, it was difficult for me to tell if they were handsome or not.
Thinking Rubel was at an age where they were interested in appearance, I smiled and replied, “He is handsome. He seems to enjoy dressing up too.”
“Young Master Ernhardt… Do you like long hair?”
“What do you mean by that?”
“No, Young Master Kiadris and Senior Orgen… they both have rather long hair, so I was just wondering.”
I raised the handleless teacup with one hand and moistened my lips.
While in Ciaran, elaborate, flowing hair was considered the standard of beauty, I still found long, lustrous hair like a silken waterfall to be beautiful.
It was embarrassing to have this conversation with someone so much younger, but since my apparent age was nearing marriageable age, it wasn’t something I couldn’t answer.
“If I had to choose between short and long… Yes. I prefer long hair.”
“Then… Should I try growing mine out too? Do you think it would suit me?”
“…What? Why, Senior?”
“Just, no, just… well…”
…Isn’t that strange?
I quietly gazed at the child. When I didn’t say anything further, Rubel hastily changed the subject.
They mentioned that Matt Nico seemed unable to concentrate in class lately, often looking elsewhere during advanced swordsmanship lessons.
They also spoke of Lucilla, who seemed to have had a recent realization.
When Rubel expressed concern that their own skills seemed to be stagnating, I comforted them, saying they were doing well enough.
We also talked about Glotin Tenner, Marianne’s lover.
Previously, Shayden had mentioned that Oliver Combine and Glotin Tenner, who had taken a throwing knife technique class with me once, were very close.
Oliver was the eldest son of the Combine Baekjakga and was set to inherit the title and territory.
Glotin’s father had dedicated his life to assisting the Combine Baekjakga with his Single-rank title. Glotin had also entered the academy with the intention of living that way.
Therefore, under normal circumstances, Glotin should have been subservient to Oliver, but their relationship was on equal footing. In fact, it seemed Oliver was the one who was wary of Glotin or harbored dissatisfaction.
If Oliver could whisper about it to me, he could have voiced his dissatisfaction directly to Glotin’s face, but Oliver, while his expression might harden in front of Glotin, never spoke harshly.
When I asked why their relationship was like this, Rubel explained:
“Young Master Glotin Tenner is quite intelligent… and Young Master Oliver Combine is a bit timid. They say they grew up together like brothers from a very young age. Also, the Combine Baekjakga isn’t very large, so the hierarchy regarding titles isn’t very strong.”
“So, it’s not that they have a bad relationship, but rather that he’s voicing dissatisfaction about his sworn brother?”
“It’s not quite like that either…
Rubel hesitated, unsure how to explain.