By Zephyria 
Before I could answer, Gyeoul went inside. Your face covered my eyes like an afterimage. I couldn’t tell if the blurriness was because of tears, or because the whole world was filled with Gyeoul.
I belatedly realized the awkward presence in my hand. I think I picked it up intending to throw it away, but thinking that even this was your trace, I couldn’t easily discard it.
If the paper cup was intact, I would have matched my lips to where yours had touched. I tossed it and it hit the nearby trash can. It made a small colliding sound, indicating it went in properly, and then it was silent.
Why was I so happy when you said perfume suited me? It was obvious it would suit me since it was a perfume you gifted.
I recalled the liquid sloshing at the bottom, almost all used up. How long would it take to arrive if I ordered it now? Considering the remaining amount, I think I could use it until this week. Would it arrive by then?
I roughly rubbed my damp face with my hands. The faintly remaining moisture was blown away by the wind. I stared at the sea for a long time. I could only hope that the redness on my face would be soaked by the waves and disappear in the meantime.
∗ ∗ ∗
I was incredibly busy.
I could define the past few days in just one sentence. I was so busy that I didn’t even know how time was passing.
As if the amount of work I had done so far was a joke, it was burdensome just to get through each day’s tasks. Mina was a very excellent Sunbae, but there were limits, and Tony was too busy handling his own work to help me.
However, it wasn’t like I couldn’t handle it without their help. It’s just that the number of times I worked overtime increased. Of course, it wasn’t mandatory, but I had to get this done to pass the work on to other teams, so I couldn’t fall behind.
It was already not enough to pour all my concentration into work, but it was also a problem that my eyes kept going to those two.
Their seats were close, so I could hear their voices too well, and my hearing automatically reacted to Gyeoul’s voice. Every time he opened his mouth, my gaze, beyond my control, turned towards him.
Just like right now.
“Please review this.”
“Leave it next to me. I’ll give you a report by the afternoon. Oh, I have a question.”
“Yes, please ask.”
“Are you free this evening?”
Ian asked Gyeoul in a flirtatious manner. What business would a company employee have seeing him privately? Asking if he was free in the evening was, in a general sense, a date invitation.
He was even holding Gyeoul’s wrist as he was about to turn around. He could have just said it, so why was he grabbing him? He should at least let go quickly.
‘Doesn’t that team work overtime?’
I clicked my pen anxiously.
I had seen Gyeoul stay at the company late at night more than once or twice, even if it wasn’t as much as our team. I shouldn’t dare wish for your misfortune, but I hoped that you would have something to do at work today.
I didn’t like Ian. To be exact, I couldn’t like him knowing the meaning of the look in his eyes as he looked at Gyeoul. He always looked at Gyeoul straightforwardly, and there was clearly an affection in his gaze that he couldn’t hide. It was very blatant, but it was uncertain whether Gyeoul knew.
There’s no way he wouldn’t know. Even I know.
“Is it because of what we talked about last time?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
Ian subtly didn’t observe formalities and spoke comfortably. He often did that, actually. And every time that happened, my eyes would meet his. As if he was deliberately showing it to me. Even though we’ve never even had a casual chat.
Gyeoul hesitated for a moment and then shook his head.
“I can’t today.”
His firm refusal was so welcome that I almost failed to manage my expression. Ian was no longer looking at me, but even so, I didn’t want to reveal this subtle feeling.
Maybe he already knows.
Ian maintained a bright smile without showing any reaction. He always had a relaxed face only when talking to Gyeoul.
What is Gyeoul’s expression like? Do you perhaps have feelings for him too?
I belatedly realized the obsessive clicking sound. Since when have I been doing this? Tony was staring at me, probably because it was quite loud. I hurriedly met his gaze and tried to pretend that I wasn’t interested in that side.
“What’s not working?”
“Ah… I don’t know where I went wrong.”
Tony let out a short sigh as if he understood. There were often moments when developers were justified in whatever they did. Just looking at the desk cluttered with Energy Drink cans, you could predict their mental state.
So, they tended to think of easy things as difficult.
He pulled his chair towards me and looked at the screen together. He must be having a hard time with his own work, but he often looked at mine, saying he was my Sunbae.
“Wow, it’s really tangled. Even if I had been looking at it for a long time, I wouldn’t have been able to find it.”
He completely attached his body to mine and pressed the keyboard. More than half of the letters filling the screen disappeared, and it was filled with new formulas that Tony had entered. I couldn’t help but admire just looking at it. My lips tingled with wanting to ask him how he figured it out.
How long had we been doing that? Finally, he closed the parentheses as if putting an end to it. It was the moment when the error that had been bothering me for hours was finally resolved.
The screen running the test no longer showed any red. It was working normally as if nothing had happened. Tony nudged my arm as if boasting. Because we were so close, the chair slid slightly to the side.
I couldn’t help but smile at his bright, cheerful smile. The image of Ian and Gyeoul was still floating in a corner of my heart, but I could cover it up a little with what had just happened.
Tony raised his fist and held it out to me. I was still not used to expressing joy with this kind of action, but I awkwardly bumped it.
Tony laughed loudly, holding his stomach at my awkward behavior. He laughed so loudly that everyone around could hear him, which made me even more embarrassed.
While changing the subject, I revealed my true feelings about him. It was a sincerity that came out very carefully, squeezing through a small gap.
“You’re really amazing. How did you solve it in one go?”
“It’s because you have to go back to the beginning to see the problem. If you’re buried in it, you can’t see the solution. In times like this, you need someone else’s help.”
He wiped the tears from his eyes and answered. He grabbed the mouse again and moved the wheel to return to the first screen. He pointed to the first line, which had a completely different formula applied.
It was simple and very basic. As Tony said, if my head wasn’t complicated, if I wasn’t focused on other things, I could have easily found it.
“Thank you. I understand now.”
“If you have any concerns, talk to me anytime. I’ll help you.”
Funnily enough, that one word felt very reliable. Even though he’s only one year older. I didn’t think I would rely on someone the same age, but I did.
Tony put a familiar Energy Drink on my desk, telling me to cheer up, and went back to his seat. Isn’t he really telling me to drink and work myself to death? This is already the fourth can today.
I moved the can to the corner, chuckled softly, and unconsciously turned my eyes. I passed Ian looking at the monitor and met eyes with Gyeoul, who was staring at me.
Uh.
An exclamation circled in my mouth before finally subsiding. I didn’t know what to do and just blinked. I was aware that I should avoid his gaze, but my body didn’t move as I thought it would.
There wasn’t really any emotion on your face. Rather, it would be right to say that we met by chance. But because you were looking at me so precisely… it was so unfamiliar that it was strange.
‘This has never happened before.’
My pupils shook. I couldn’t grasp your intentions, so my head spun. I hadn’t done anything wrong, but it felt like cold sweat was dripping down.
Gyeoul soon turned his head as if he had no interest. Only I was left, looking at the heartless him.
If you would look at me one more time…
For some reason, I felt down. I belatedly realized that I was excited just because he was interested in me. I was someone who could be happy with just one of your glances.
It seemed like I needed to take a break for a while. I couldn’t even catch such a simple mistake properly, so how could I do the next task?
I reached out to drink the drink Tony gave me, but an orange light flickered on the taskbar. It was the company messenger that was opened for this project.
‘There shouldn’t be any contact right now?’
I grabbed the mouse with the hand that was reaching for the drink to check if it was an urgent work message. I could drink the Energy Drink anytime. Tony gave it to me boastfully, but it was always available in the office.
Winter
[You’re going to die if you keep doing that.]
I had to seriously consider whether the chat containing the sentence was meant as a death threat.