By Zephyria 
My whole body was on edge. I hadn’t kept a proper distance and had just rushed in, so it was understandable that he felt threatened.
He glared even harder, pressing for an answer. I needed to clear up the misunderstanding immediately, but I couldn’t answer his question. I didn’t even know the answer myself.
Not friends, not lovers, just acquaintances. What relationship could be more abstract and vague than that?
I wanted to run away. My pathetic nature, always turning away at crucial moments, reared its ugly head without hesitation. But running away wouldn’t make things disappear. I wasn’t a kid anymore, and that stupid phase was over.
My molars ground together with difficulty. My jaw clenched so hard that even my cheeks stiffened. I couldn’t properly see what kind of face Gyeoul was making.
I barely managed to open my stiff lips. The tip of my tongue hit the roots of my teeth on the roof of my mouth and dropped.
“I’m…”
“He’s the guide who showed me around today.”
I closed my mouth, interrupted by Gyeoul’s words. I had been about to introduce myself as a college classmate. The relationship he defined was even more distant than that. Honestly, it was worse than just knowing each other. Anyone could be that.
Two pairs of shoes side by side, and one pair facing them.
It felt like the line that had just been drawn was setting our limit. A business relationship, just helping with the trip for the day. I had expected something more, and my nose twitched. It stung. Maybe I had been trying to catch a glimpse of hope.
Not even as friends, but if you thought I had some value, then maybe, just maybe, we could stay in touch, even if only occasionally. I wanted it to be fate, not just coincidence.
He seemed subtly excited, and his English came out faster.
“So, you met at the Statue of Liberty? A stranger who could be dangerous. Of course, if you were less bored, I should be grateful for that.”
Gyeoul’s unfriendly answer clearly displeased him. He seemed much more transparent than I thought. The way he subtly blocked Gyeoul was a perfect example.
The man was dressed to the nines, covered head to toe in designer brands. I couldn’t help but scan him. It was almost instinct. To assess the opponent. He was probably doing the same. I could already feel his sharp gaze.
A long beige coat that reached mid-calf, a white knit sweater over a white shirt, slim-fit brown slacks and a glimpse of a belt, sand-colored ankle socks, and black loafers with a famous logo. He had clearly put a lot of thought into it.
‘Is this Ian?’
For a moment, my thoughts went in the wrong direction. Suddenly, the attractiveness I had felt turned malicious. Even though I knew it wasn’t the answer. I couldn’t just hide behind Gyeoul and hope the awkward moment would pass. I had to do something.
I spoke in the most trustworthy and polished voice I could muster. It was a tone I often used at work.
“We’re high school classmates.”
I brought out the oldest fact I could. I straightened my posture, as if there were no ulterior motives involved. I had learned from experience that slumped shoulders only left a bad impression.
The man released Gyeoul’s wrist and naturally extended his hand to me. I lightly grasped his large hand, so as not to make him feel awkward. The faint wariness melted away like snow. Our clasped hands shook gently.
A smile spread across his pleasant face.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Winter is a dear friend of mine, so I overreacted. I’m Michael Abbott. Please, call me Michael.”
“…Yi-tae Quinn. You can call me Quinn.”
He had no problem referring to Gyeoul as a friend. It was something I couldn’t do.
I heard a faint sound of suppressed laughter right next to me. Quinn, a low murmur followed. I rolled my eyes to find the source of the sound. Gyeoul was looking at me, his lips twitching.
His lively lips parted.
“Quinn, we were shopping. Want to join us?”
“Of course. Is that okay with you, Quinn?”
“…Yes.”
I had missed the timing, and finally let go of the hand I had been holding. Gyeoul’s fingertips brushed against the back of my hand and moved away. The spot where we had touched tingled. It felt like a secret contact. Whether that was his intention or not.
My mood fluctuated.
The sight of their backs, now a pair, stung my eyes. Anyone, not just Michael, could stand next to Gyeoul. I had to consciously remind myself that that wasn’t my place. Otherwise, I might get greedy again, not knowing my place.
I didn’t have enough strength in my hand and accidentally dropped my phone. Thanks to the case, it didn’t break. Despite the loud crash as it hit the floor, neither of them turned around.
It was a really loud noise…
“Wasn’t this the perfume Ian used to wear?”
“Oh, are you two so close that you even know each other’s scents?”
“It’s on his desk. It would be more of a problem if you didn’t know. I go there dozens of times a day to get approvals.”
“That’s also a form of interest.”
Michael very naturally grouped Gyeoul and Ian together. His playful tone conveyed intimacy.
Suddenly, I imagined wedging myself between them, who were standing so close. I had often thought about it since high school, so I could easily picture it. Gyeoul completely despising me, and me, the disgusting me, still being satisfied, flashed through my mind.
What if I smashed all that perfume and grabbed Gyeoul’s wrist and left…?
A hollow laugh escaped me. It was a ridiculous pipe dream. All I could do was stay here and wait for Gyeoul to look back at me. Even if it took a very long time, I could wait.
“I should buy one. If I don’t buy something, I think I’ll be in trouble for a while.”
“Okay. I won’t misunderstand. You don’t have to explain.”
Gyeoul picked up a perfume in the shape of a blue bottle. He had chosen a gift, so were they finally leaving? The lining of my stomach was cracking. Nausea and stabbing pain came in waves.
I blinked my parched eyes and turned my head. I was overcome with the urge to break a bottle on the shelf and shove it into my wrist. Gyeoul easily took pity on the weak. So, he might even give a little attention to an animal like me.
“Are you going to use that? It’s a heavy, cold scent. It doesn’t suit you.”
“It’s not for me. There’s someone I’m grateful to who I think it would suit.”
“How romantic.”
“Are you saying you want me to get you one too? Are you jealous?”
Jealous.
Michael recoiled from Gyeoul in disgust. They seemed to joke around like that often; the whole scene looked familiar. I glimpsed two different types of perfume in Gyeoul’s arms, completely different from the base notes.
Did Gyeoul know the meaning of giving perfume as a gift? Had he chosen it with such a significant and heavy heart? Hoping to be remembered. With a face that I couldn’t see, but that shouldn’t be revealed to the world, a face of excitement.
I lowered my head and hid my panting breaths. My rapid breathing was due to my chronic illness, not for any other reason. Like jealousy.
“Quinn, are you not interested in perfume? It would be nice to buy one as a souvenir. I can recommend one. Were we boring you with our private talk?”
The kind Michael spoke to me first. I composed my expression, smiled, and raised my head. Gyeoul’s collar was slightly twisted to the left. I should fix it.
I replied to him in a polite tone.
“No, not at all. Would you recommend one?”
I took a step towards Gyeoul. I couldn’t stay back when I was the topic. Now all three of us were standing side by side. Like a group.
Michael took out a blotter from the display and expertly sprayed perfume on it. He shook it about five times, smelled it, and then repeated the process with a different perfume on a new blotter.
“This is difficult. Winter, don’t you have any perfume to recommend? I don’t know Quinn very well.”
“…He doesn’t use perfume much.”
“It’s a souvenir. He can start using it now. It’s a nice gesture, and it has meaning. I’ll give you the perfume I choose as an apology for my rudeness earlier.”
Gyeoul seemed uncomfortable. That feeling was evident in his expression. Michael didn’t seem to notice and was just focused on his task. Gyeoul was more important to me than some perfume that I had never seen before and wouldn’t even use.
There was nothing I wanted so much that I would ruin his mood.
I was about to reach out to stop Michael from picking up a new perfume when Gyeoul glanced at me and said, a little coldly.
“There’s no need for that, Michael.”