By Zephyria 
His sexual relationship with the man wasn’t very satisfying. He had approached with a gentlemanly demeanor, but his bedroom manners were the worst. He kept slapping Eun-ha’s ass in excitement, and while doing it doggy-style, he roughly pressed down on Eun-ha’s neck. Almost like he was choking him.
The only thing Eun-ha liked was that his body temperature was high. Eun-ha hugged the man for a while after they were done. With his body exhausted, he intertwined his legs with the man and nestled in his arms. The man seemed quite pleased with this, fondling Eun-ha’s ass and saying cheesy things. His hands were rough and coarse. Eun-ha mostly ignored him, focusing only on the warmth the man provided, and calmed his mind.
It was warm, and he could hear his heartbeat. He felt like his chest, which had been aching as if it would break, was being filled.
The man kept whispering that Eun-ha was cute. When they parted, he asked for his contact information. Eun-ha said he would contact him and took the man’s number. Then, as soon as the man left the hotel room, he deleted it. He blinked languidly and fell into unconsciousness without even knowing when he fell asleep. It was a good night’s sleep for the first time in a while.
When Eun-ha didn’t contact him, he visited the cafe again a few days later. Eun-ha treated him like a stranger, ignoring the subtle signals he was sending from under the surface. He hoped he would pick up on the implications of his rejection and back off.
However, the man waited until late at night and dragged Eun-ha, who was leaving work, into a secluded alley. He reproached him, asking why he hadn’t contacted him and why he was avoiding him. The eyes he faced were filled with an anxiety of unknown origin.
Eun-ha was dumbfounded that the man was acting as if he had some kind of ownership over him, even though they had only spent one night together. He was the type Eun-ha despised the most. In an instant, his nerves were frayed, and he spat out whatever came to mind. The man, who had been bearing it with a strained jaw, suddenly showed a flash of anger. The moment he felt a sense of crisis as reason quickly left his pupils, he had already been hit in the face. Not satisfied, the man raised his hand again. It might have been a predictable outcome. From the moment the man made a huge misunderstanding and unilaterally pushed his position, from the moment he arbitrarily slapped his ass and acted like he was choking him without any agreement.
Staggering from the powerful blow, Eun-ha felt his reason flicker away and grabbed a large piece of concrete debris nearby. He struck the visible thigh with all his might. “Ah!” He climbed on top of the man, who fell screaming, and struck his shoulder again. His hair was grabbed. After that, he doesn’t remember much.
He ended up at the police station after a passerby reported it. That’s when he found out that the man was even married. Crazy bastard. Eun-ha glared at the man as if he couldn’t believe it while being interrogated. Only then did the man seem to come to his senses, avoiding Eun-ha’s gaze with a pale face. He looked like he was worried about his family, which was fucking disgusting. He should have no conscience at all. If he was going to act sober, why did he act like that with me?
He felt a surge of desire to get revenge on the fucking bastard, but he hated being tired even more. Eun-ha left the police station after reaching an agreement.
Returning home at dawn, Eun-ha was reminded of how he had come to prefer stable partner relationships over one-night stands. If you go crazy with loneliness and pick up just anything, you’re bound to have problems like this.
Despite the reminder, Eun-ha ended up sleeping with another man he met at a Pub four days later while drunk. It wasn’t bad in many ways, so they met about two more times. He only thought about bringing up the idea of a partner, judging the other person in his mind.
Living thoughtlessly and recklessly as usual, it was soon Park Hyun-ji’s birthday party.
One weekend in May, Eun-ha didn’t forget his friend’s warning that he would be severely punished if he didn’t come, and attended the party. The location was a mansion owned by Park Hyun-ji’s family. It wasn’t their main residence, but a second home used for multiple purposes. They often held parties, entertained guests, lent it to acquaintances on special occasions, and used it as a vacation home for relaxation.
It was owned by Park Hyun-ji’s Parents, but Park Hyun-ji was the one who was more involved, and thanks to that, Eun-ha’s friends used it almost like a hideout. Eun-ha also used to frequent this place until a few years ago. But he hardly comes anymore.
Eun-ha, who was familiar with the space consisting of a large main building and a small detached house next to it, surrounded by high walls and a large yard, took a moment to look around at the scenery. The interior was already in full swing with a playful and festive atmosphere. People in simple attire went back and forth between the swimming pool and the poolside barbecue area, and next to it, a boisterous drinking party was taking place on the widely installed Cabana Sofa. The interior of the mansion, with its front entirely open with clear glass, also looked messy with people tangled here and there. The loud music coming from somewhere and the voices bursting from everywhere heightened the excitement.
Some familiar faces approached, half drunk and staggering. Eun-ha, wearing his public face, was exchanging greetings smoothly. “Oh! Lee Eun-ha!” He raised his head at the sound coming from far above, and saw Park Hyun-ji leaning against the glass railing of the second floor of the main building, smoking a cigarette.
“Why are you here so late? I thought you weren’t coming. Come up quickly!”
Eun-ha briefly curled up the corners of his lips towards him. He politely brushed off the people approaching and headed to the second floor. He wished Park Hyun-ji a happy birthday and exchanged brief greetings with the friends who had arrived earlier. The group of friends he belonged to were playing pocket billiards and betting.
Eun-ha watched the betting and joined them. He exchanged perfunctory greetings with some familiar faces and accepted a cocktail that someone brought him. After that, it was a familiar time. Drinking, betting, playing games, and talking.
He quickly became pleasantly tipsy. He moved locations several times, and many people passed by. Eun-ha occasionally showed a smooth smile and mingled with them like flowing water. He especially had many fun conversations with his friends. It was enjoyable. He didn’t come out to play often, but once he made up his mind, he wasn’t the type to back out.
As he drank whatever was given to him, he started to become rapidly confused from some point on. He instinctively felt that if he drank any more here, he would pass out. Maybe he had already reached that point without knowing it.
“You should go and rest, Lee Eun-ha.”
“Yeah…”
Gu Hae-bin, who was sitting next to him, noticed this and tapped him on the shoulder. Eun-ha, who had answered, staggered up and headed where his body remembered. He groped along the long corridor and opened the door to one of the rooms used for guests. He immediately collapsed onto the visible sofa. He felt like the world, which had been shaking in all directions, was being pulled down with three times the gravity. His mind quickly blurred.
He took a short nap. It was close to sleeping, but he was buried in a strange state of arousal with about 10 percent of his consciousness. It was because it was too noisy all around to fall into a deep sleep.
While he was drowsily stretched out, he heard incessantly boisterous voices. Some people left, and other people came. Accordingly, the rapidly changing flow of conversation entered one ear and flowed out the other.
Why didn’t Ju-hee come?
Suddenly, a woman’s voice that he could understand caught his attention, and a familiar low tone rumbled and pierced his eardrums.
Noona is busy these days preparing for her recital.
Aha. That’s too bad. I want to see Ju-hee.
Anyway, I’m glad you came. I was curious about you. Ju-hee cherishes you so much.
…Noona cherishes me?
Or what? You know I’m close to Ju-hee, right? Every time she goes somewhere, she says she has to buy you a gift. Jun does. Our Jun does. And three years ago? When you were seriously injured? How much Ju-hee suffered back then. She cried and cried while drinking…
—Ah. But isn’t that what everyone does?
Everyone? I buy gifts for my Parents, but I never buy gifts for my own brother. And I don’t care if he’s sick and dying. I don’t even have his contact information on my phone.
More importantly, do you have a girlfriend?
…Why suddenly?
Do you have one or not?
I don’t.
Why not? Do you want to date me?
…Excuse me?
Hey. Don’t joke like that. He’s young.
He looks like it. How old is he?
A low answer that followed. A burst of laughter in an instant. Voices. Voices. Voices…
He opened his eyes. His vision, which had been foggy like covered in mist, gradually cleared. The surroundings were somehow quiet. The noisy mansion had a much calmer atmosphere. Voices were still coming from somewhere, but they were only faint. It was a silence that felt strangely unsettling.