#087

“I see.”

Hastily clutching the gem, Cullen stepped back. Although the curse of Rodiak could only be broken through his first partner, Kiyen, he feared showing Anan an unsightly spectacle. Concealing the gem in his embrace, he quickly separated from the group of Elves.

“I’m going to find my companions. Is that alright?”

“Yes, please go! We’re fine.”

Not only the Elves’ territory but more than half of the Duke’s territory was in ruins, so there was much to do. However, Lasano was more important for now, so Cullen put everything else aside. He also didn’t have the mental capacity to think about anything else.

Hating the dizzying heat that rose within him, Cullen clenched his fist tightly. As his fingernails dug into his skin, the pain momentarily pushed away the desire.

While searching for Ulli and Arne, Cullen scratched his palm with his nails dozens of times. Only after scratching until blood welled up did he meet with the others. Arne was the first to spot Cullen. Normally, that would have been impossible.

“Lord Cullen!”

“Did you find the High Priest?”

Ulli, having already met up with them, ran up behind Arne. Ulli didn’t seem to be suffering from side effects, but she looked quite exhausted. She must have used Pantal, so there would definitely be aftereffects.

The questions about Zarkas and their weapons that kept popping up briefly disturbed his thoughts before disappearing. Going to the temple was more urgent. He needed to confirm Lasano’s survival, and after that, he planned to hide and endure.

“Lasano’s injuries… are severe.”

The heat of Rodiak, at first, made one feel dizzy like a flu, and then, it ferociously gained momentum by exploiting weakened willpower. Enduring the dizziness, Cullen spoke in a low voice, and Arne noticed something strange.

“Are you alright?”

“Are you hurt too?”

Ulli grabbed him, perhaps to examine him. The moment Ulli’s fingers touched his wrist, he felt revulsion. What had been fine moments ago, the heat throughout his body vehemently rejected her touch.

He wondered if this had happened before, and then remembered that whenever the curse flared up, Kiyen had always taken him away.

He missed Kiyen. He wanted to run to him right now and hug him tightly.

But he had to endure. He had decided to try and bear this curse alone, somehow. Unlike the first time he was cursed, there was a possibility that the curse had weakened. Perhaps this time he could get through it.

“I’m just tired.”

Cullen finally managed to answer after mutilating his palm until blood completely pooled under his nails. The pain was effective, for now. Although the intensity of the pain needed to increase for it to be suppressed proportionally, one never knew. Pretending not to be dizzy, Cullen straightened his body.

“Lord Kiyen… took Lasano to the temple. Arne, your medical skills might be needed, so you should hurry.”

After saying this with all his might, Cullen began to walk. He resumed his pace, ignoring the worried glances he caught from Ulli and Arne.

Even if he acknowledged them as comrades, he couldn’t tell them about this. He wanted to keep his private matters with Kiyen to himself.

The name that surfaced without a moment’s pause fueled his desire, and Cullen bit his lip, breathing heavily. He felt like he was already hitting his limit.

Thanks to Kiyen’s shield, the temple and nearby public facilities were all safe. Upon arriving at the temple, Moet greeted them. He had been protecting the villagers with the knights, so it was unlikely he knew about what happened at the Duke’s mansion.

“Your Highness, you are safe!”

Following him, the knights prostrated themselves. The villagers gathered in the temple also paid their respects, recognizing the group. Hiding his bloodied fists in his collar, Cullen managed to ask him only one thing.

“Is the High Priest alright?”

Upon entering the temple, the heat that had been shaking his reason like poison briefly subsided. Perhaps it was a place where the Goddess’s power reached, so it might be mitigating the curse. However, Cullen had a premonition that this moment would not last long.

“The priests have taken him. However, his injuries are quite severe…”

At Moet’s words, Arne stepped forward. Although uncomfortable with the attention, he spoke with a desperate look, worried about Lasano.

“I am just a Common Priest, but I know how to handle herbs. I am also Lasano’s companion. May I see his condition as well? I want to help even a little.”

At Arne’s words, Moet’s eyes widened.

“You were Lord Kiyen’s chef…?”

“What, he was really a priest?”

While Ulli and Moet were both surprised, Cullen walked past them. The refreshing energy briefly cooled his head, but that was all.

Like ice melting in an instant, the energy flowed away like water, and the heat coiled again. It felt like his insides were burning. If he hadn’t turned his palms into rags, he might have already shown signs of heat. Swallowing a gag, Cullen leaned against the wall, pushing people aside.

“Your Highness?”

Moet followed Cullen, asking. Waving away the crowd that surged after him, he whispered to Moet.

“I need an empty room. For a moment, a place to rest……”

“Do you require a priest? Is something troubling you?”

What I need is Kiyen. Cullen barely swallowed the words. He had almost begged to be called to him.

“I am not injured…… guide me to a space where I will not be disturbed.”

“But……”

Cullen cut off the words Moet was about to utter sharply.

“Now.”

As he commanded with a pale face, Moet stepped back. After dismissing the knights, he quickly guided Cullen. Now that he had confirmed Lasano was alive, he only needed to compose himself. If he could somehow stay alive, he could call the High Priest and save him…….

Moet led him to an empty room. Given its rather grand size, it seemed to be a guest chamber. As soon as he entered, Cullen, gripping the doorknob, warned in a low voice.

“Do not let anyone in, and I request cold water for washing.”

Perhaps he could endure if he washed himself with cold water.

“Yes, Your Highness.”

Seeming to sense something was amiss, he immediately withdrew. Leaning against the door and sliding down, Cullen let out a pained breath.

Kneeling, he bit his lip, trying to force other thoughts into his mind. Lasano, or Zarkas, the dead Young Duke, but the words he struggled to recall soon melted away.

Finally alone, the dam broke. The lust he had suppressed with all his will rushed in. Krrk, he let out a groan and crushed his tattered palms again. It was no use anymore.

He wanted to feel Kiyen. He wanted to touch his soft skin, to be held by his firm muscles, to bite his sweet lips. The agony of not being able to taste it made his eyes well up with tears.

Cullen finally understood how maddening this curse was. How terrible would it have been if he had become like this with someone other than Kiyen? Thinking of becoming aroused to embrace someone he didn’t care for made him feel sick.

Not long after, Moet sent someone to bring a tub of cold water. Refusing Moet, who seemed concerned and wanted to check on him, Cullen sent him out of the room.

The moment the door closed, Cullen let out a haah, hot breath, and barely managed to stand.

Tearing off his blood-stained clothes, he threw his belongings and weapons onto the floor, then stepped into the cold water. The water in the ducal territory, with winter having arrived, was as cold as ice, and he shivered the moment his toes touched it. Haaak, he gasped, submerging his entire body.

If only Kiyen were here, everything would be resolved.

The moment he thought that, Cullen plunged his face into the water. So that the bone-chilling cold would seep in, so that he couldn’t think of Kiyen for lack of breath.

He repeated this for a long time, but it was in vain. The burning desire quickly warmed his cold body. Overwhelmed by a craving so painful it felt like death, Cullen roughly climbed out of the tub.

It was like a seizure. Stumbling towards the spacious bed, he collapsed onto it.

“Haa……. H, hng…….”

He rubbed his wet body against the bed. His body, knowing exactly what it yearned for, had already heated up. Cullen bit the sheets, suppressing his moans. Closing his eyes, he thought of anything but Kiyen, anything else…….

“Hoo, hoo, h…….”

His wandering hands gradually moved lower. Like the first day he was consumed by Rodiak.

The only difference was that his hands reached backward instead of forward. Even though he had always believed it was natural for a man to derive pleasure from his own genitals, all the pleasure Cullen knew came from behind. Kiyen had made it so.

“Ah, haa…….”

He squeezed his eyes shut and pushed his fingers inside. Unlike his cold fingers, the area around the opening was hot and twitching.

It was the first time he had touched himself there. As he thought that, a clear liquid dripped from the tip of his already erect penis. Every thought was a stimulation.

“……Ha, hng, ng, haa…….”

He let go of the sheet he was biting and let out a breath. His heart grew desperate, as if he were starving, and he pushed his fingers further into the tightly closed opening. As he forced open the hole, which was stiff from disuse, he felt the hot, squishy interior. It was strange.

“Kk…….”

Biting his chapped lips, he pushed his fingers in further. He fumbled and groped the unfamiliar interior. Merely by inserting something, the inner walls became restless and nibbled at his fingers, but it didn’t immediately turn into pleasure.

It was bizarre. When Kiyen inserted himself, just that alone made him feel so, so good…….

“Kiyen, haa, ha, Kiyen……”

He called his name, sobbing with impatience. He didn’t know what else to do.

What should he do to feel good by inserting? He needed to relieve the heat that had accumulated to the point of bursting his head.

Pulling his fingers out, Cullen rubbed his body against the bed. As a last resort, he tried to obtain pleasure in the only way he knew.

Sandwiching the sheet between his legs, Cullen moved his hips with his flushed body. As his penis rubbed against the sheet, a faint pleasure arose. It was just enough to make him go mad, spurting out little by little.

“Hng, h, haa, ha…….”

It was impossible. Cullen admitted his limits. Without Kiyen, there was no pleasure. His mind was filled entirely with Kiyen. His name was etched densely in his brain. It echoed like a quiet noise, filling the room.

Just then, the door opened. Cullen gasped and sat up. The heat pressing down on his entire body made it difficult to move, but if Moet or someone else had come to bother him…….

“I told you not to let anyone in……”

Cullen blinked his reddened eyes and looked ahead. As soon as he saw the tall, handsome man standing beyond the silently opened door, his mouth snapped shut. Kiyen, with his usual neat and beautiful face, was watching him.

“……Kiyen, sir?”

Joy surged madly, then subsided by a sliver of reason. Cullen hesitated and retreated.

He shouldn’t have come. He wouldn’t be able to bear it. The thought flickered faintly.

“What are you doing here?”