By Zephyria 
“Didn’t we just make eye contact?”
Aska seemed to have noticed the gaze as well. I was unconsciously nervous and asked Aska.
“What if I get scolded?”
“Why? You didn’t do anything wrong.”
Did I not do anything wrong? Or did I? I didn’t think Mahir would scold me that much, but I was strangely nervous.
As I was thinking that, I suddenly realized. The reason I was scared wasn’t because I was afraid of being scolded, but because it had been so long that I felt awkward. Besides, for whatever reason, I killed Khalifa. I was even more perplexed because I couldn’t predict how Mahir would react to that.
At that moment, Aska, who had been staring at me, suddenly grabbed my hand.
“If you get scolded, I’ll get scolded with you.”
“Why? You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“If we get scolded together, it’ll be less scary, right? It’ll be divided in half.”
Does that mean the fear will be divided in half? It was hard to understand, but that wasn’t the important thing right now.
“If it gets too hard when you’re being scolded, send me a signal.”
Aska seriously pressed down on the back of my hand with his fingernails.
“If you do this, I’ll take you and run away.”
“……”
I was speechless at the specific method. Was he really serious? I stared blankly at Aska and laughed.
“And you can say I killed the Emperor.”
But my facial muscles stiffened at the words that followed.
“I’m not human anyway, so if I say my power went out of control, wouldn’t that be taken into consideration? It’s somewhat true that it went out of control. And I was the cause in the first place.”
His tone was serious, without a hint of playfulness.
I reached into my hood and groped Aska’s cheekbones and eyes.
“You want me to throw you into the fire to save myself?”
Did Aska really think I could do that? That in itself was shocking.
“What fire? I’ll just get scolded a little. Mahir wouldn’t really burn me, would he?”
Of course, I knew Mahir wouldn’t do that. But the problem wasn’t the severity of the crime or whether there would be punishment. It was a question of whether I would put Aska in front of me as a shield to avoid trouble, whatever the reason.
Not just this, but no matter what difficulties or hardships came, I could never do that. I’d rather hold hands and die together.
How could I explain this fact that would never change, even if the earth and sky were to switch places? I sighed and grabbed Aska’s hair, pulling it hard.
“I can’t do that.”
“Why? I don’t care if I get scolded by Mahir, I’m not scared. I don’t think I’ll get scolded that much.”
While we were having this conversation, Mahir had already gone far away and was out of sight. I put my hood back on and took Aska’s hand.
“Let’s go.”
We didn’t say a word on the way back to the inn. It wasn’t intentional, but there were so many people and it was so noisy that it wasn’t a situation where we could talk.
In the war-like scene, Aska bought two candies and a pendant with a fake jewel. As soon as we got back to the inn, Aska put the necklace around my neck.
When I looked closely, it felt similar to an earring. Something I couldn’t explain in words… a vibe? I didn’t know what it was, but it didn’t matter since Aska gave it to me.
“Aska.”
I opened my mouth as I tidied Aska’s messy hair and tied it up. Aska, who was licking the candy he had just bought, turned to me.
His lips and tongue were dyed blue because of the candy’s coloring. It was quite a sight, and I lost my words for a moment. He wasn’t a child, so why wasn’t it awkward… I was just moving my lips, not knowing what to say, when Aska held out the candy to me.
“Try this. Something keeps popping on my tongue.”
What did he mean by popping? Curious, I stuck out my tongue and licked the end of the candy. Then, something really popped on my tongue as if lightning had struck. But that was only for a moment, and I frowned at the overly sweet and artificial taste.
“Isn’t it amazing?”
How could he eat something like this? I covered my mouth with my hand and nodded.
“It’s amazing. Anyway, it’s not your fault that I killed Khalifa that day. Have you been thinking that all along?”
I had been intentionally avoiding this topic and not even thinking about it. That’s because Khalifa was an existence that couldn’t be explained by simple emotions like sadness, anger, or joy.
I had never organized this emotion. I had never faced it.
For the first time since that day, I recalled the situation in detail. The conversation we had while facing each other with swords, the accusations, the expressions and eyes, the temperature of the blood that splattered, the feeling of the frozen sword tearing through leather and piercing flesh…
Even though time had passed, it was as vivid as if it had happened yesterday.
“Even if it wasn’t you, I would have eventually done something like that someday. I’m not saying this so you don’t feel guilty, but that’s the truth.”
Aska, with his blue lips closed, stared blankly at me. It wasn’t a situation to laugh, but his lips twitched when I looked at his face. I had no choice but to take my eyes off his blue lips and turn my head to look at the air.
“I thought I could endure it until Mahir became Emperor, but that probably wouldn’t have been possible. If you weren’t there, I would have caused trouble long ago, right?”
Since getting married, there hasn’t been a single day to rest. I had to clean up after Aska’s accidents, search for the Forbidden book, find out about Aska’s condition, give him blood, give him sex education, and take him out to play…
Even if I had ten bodies, it wouldn’t have been enough.
“I was always angry, like a volcano waiting to erupt. You may have been the trigger, but I didn’t kill Khalifa because of you. Got it?”
Aska tilted his head with a bewildered expression. Then, as if he didn’t understand, he asked.
“But is that so important? Whether it’s because of me or not?”
“You’re saying nonsense about taking the blame for me because you think I killed him because of you.”
As I spoke, my chest became stuffy again. Not knowing how I felt, Aska shook his head with innocent eyes wide open like a rabbit.
“No?”
“No?”
“I just offered an alternative because you seemed to hate being scolded. Like when you leave bread you don’t want to eat, and I eat it for you.”
It seemed like he was giving an easy-to-understand example, but it was even more confusing. I couldn’t understand what he meant at all.
“Anyway, we’re accomplices. What’s the point of two accomplices arguing about whether it’s because of you or me?”
Aska sighed as if he was frustrated and approached me. Then, as if to strengthen the bond between accomplices, he suddenly tried to lick my lips. Like that candy from before…
No matter how cute and lovely Aska was, my shoulders flinched when I saw his blue tongue. As I pulled my upper body back, Aska looked at me with a shocked expression.
Just as I was about to make an excuse, I heard a knock. It was a helping hand from the sky. I quickly got up and opened the door wide.
“Why…”
I already knew it would be Abyss, so I opened the door without thinking, and there was an unexpected person standing beyond the door.
“……”
It was Mahir.
Not a hallucination, but real…
No, why did he suddenly appear like this?
I couldn’t close my gaping mouth and froze in place, still holding the door.
What should I say when I meet Mahir? I thought it would be best to act as if nothing had happened, as if we had just parted yesterday.
It would definitely be awkward, but if I smiled and joked, wouldn’t Mahir smile along with me as he always had? It wouldn’t be bad to just gloss over it like that.
As the time to meet Mahir approached, my thoughts became firm. I thought I should just act immature like when I was young, so I could hide my awkward feelings as much as possible…
As I met his dark eyes filled with all sorts of emotions, I took a step back. I knelt down on the floor and lowered my head with my palms showing. As soon as the cold, hard floor touched my forehead, I opened my mouth.
“To the Sun God Rahan…”
Before my trembling voice could finish, Mahir grabbed my arm and pulled me up. As soon as I straightened my bent back, he hugged me tightly.
“Where have you been?”
Mahir, who was now the Emperor, asked with the same worried voice as before. I was hugged so tightly that I didn’t know what expression to make, so I just closed my eyes.