By Zephyria He had taken off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves comfortably to his elbows, and on his shirt collar was the tie gifted by ‘Yoon Hye-an’.
“Oh…”
Following Choi Hong-seo’s gaze, which was fixed on the tie, his eyes also drifted downwards. He chuckled and gripped the knot of the tie, shaking it lightly.
“You gave it to me yourself, and now you recognize it? How cruel.”
At that time, he had worn a different tie when he went to Hanseo Group… so he thought this gift was useless.
Instead of saying that, Choi Hong-seo tightened his grip on the mug he held in both hands.
“It doesn’t clash with the color of the tie you gave me last time, so I think I’ll use both well. Thank you.”
“…What?”
His voice, asking for confirmation, trembled, his gaze at him trembled, and even though he was holding the warm mug, his hands trembled. Yet, he offered no explanation to Choi Hong-seo. He just took a sip of coffee with a bitter smile.
The tie he gave me last time…
His words treated the Yoon Hye-an in front of him entirely as Choi Hong-seo. Not because he knew he was Choi Hong-seo, but because he wanted to. Because he wanted to erase Choi Hong-seo’s absence, even if only in that way.
Even knowing that, his heart pounded frantically.
“Why don’t you sit down? If the sofa is uncomfortable, you can sit at the dining table.”
Lee Hae-sung gestured towards the dining table behind him, speaking to Choi Hong-seo, who remained standing. Since there was only a two-seater sofa in the room, sitting on it meant sitting right next to him. And very close at that.
His already chaotic mind became a complete mess. Unable to sit down quickly, Choi Hong-seo pushed the chair here and there, flustered, and finally placed it at an awkward distance from him before sitting down.
Lee Hae-sung, who had been quietly watching him, rubbed the handle of his mug with his thumb and asked in a slow voice.
“Do you want me to leave that quickly?”
“It’s not that… It’s just too small here. If you have something to say, let’s go to the cafe downstairs…”
“Why do you want me to leave so badly?”
“You must be uncomfortable in a place like this.”
“It’s not uncomfortable at all. I don’t think I’m the one who’s uncomfortable.”
He took another sip of coffee, lowered his gaze, and looked down at the dark liquid in the mug. Then, with his lips sealed, he let out a long sigh. His broad shoulders, wrapped in his shirt, rose as if inflating, then slowly settled back down.
Lifting his eyelids, his gaze returned to Choi Hong-seo.
“If you were going to be so distraught, why did you give me the tie?”
His tone was chiding, but it didn’t carry a serious weight. He let out a short sigh, as if regretting something, and added in a lighter voice.
“I won’t be here long, so don’t make that deathly face.”
It wasn’t that he wanted him to leave quickly, nor was he dying. Rather, he wanted him to stay longer.
Yet, he had to wish for him to leave quickly, and the longer he wanted him to stay, the more anxious his stay became. What he wanted was Choi Hong-seo, but he wasn’t Choi Hong-seo right now. That’s why…
Rustle, rustle.
Tiffany, who had been quiet, started making a racket as if she had found a toy under the bed. It seemed like she was playing a maze game among the boxes pushed under the bed, filling up the space. He also looked under the bed.
The moment the sound subsided, Tiffany poked her furry face out.
Without fully emerging, she lay flat under the bed, only her face sticking out, and tilted her head, looking up at the unfamiliar visitor.
Nyaa?
Her cry, as if asking who he was, sounded somewhat anxious. Choi Hong-seo quickly got up and brought her favorite Churu, intending to calm her down with a treat. As soon as she saw him taking the Churu from the kitchen cabinet, Tiffany darted towards the kitchen, avoiding the visitor.
“Okay, I’ll give it to you quickly. But you have to be good, alright?”
As he returned to his spot, he earnestly pleaded with her, who was sticking close to his legs and following him. Please, don’t cause any trouble until he leaves.
He sat on the floor, maintaining a certain distance from him, and began feeding Tiffany the Churu. As always, she placed her front paws on Choi Hong-seo’s hand and licked the treat with all her might, focusing only on the snack. She seemed to have forgotten her wariness of the visitor.
“What’s her name?”
He, who had been silently looking this way, asked in a voice that seemed to show little interest. It felt like there was no topic to discuss, so I was asking.
“It’s Tiffany.””Tiffany?””Yes, I didn’t put it on, it was before.”.. So, I apparently put it on like that before the accident.”Ah… So, Tiffany?”
“……”
So, Tiffany? Not knowing what it meant, Choi Hong-seo looked at Lee Hae-seong, who was sitting on the sofa.
“Long fur with gray spots on a white background.” Especially gray stains around the eyes, nose, mouth, and ears that look like they have been dyed.”
“……”Did you put it on without knowing?” Well, I can’t even remember the name I gave myself.”Tiffany cried out in a high voice, perhaps because the height of her hand changed while looking at the understanding.” “Lower your hand more,” the creature expressed its dissatisfaction by pressing its front paw against Choi Hong-seo’s hand. Choi Hong-seo quickly lowered her hands.
“One of the cats raised by Freddie Mercury of the rock band ‘Queen’ had exactly this color and was a long-haired breed.” Her name was Tiffany.”Ah… I didn’t know. I’m just…”Did you think it was a name taken from a jewelry brand?”Instead of answering, he nodded, and Lee Hae-seong chuckled softly.
No matter how much she licked, there was nothing left to eat, so Tiffany turned around without hesitation and jumped onto the bed. Choi Hong-seo began to lure the guy because his mouth was dry.
“Tiffany, you need to behave.” Chu, I’ll give you one more treat. Let’s eat one more churro, okay?The one that burrowed into the blanket, which was not properly organized and was all bunched up, wandered around freely inside it. I heard the sound of paper scratching and crumpling as someone stepped on the poster.
“Tiffany, Tiffany, come this way.” Huh?Choi Hong-seo lifted the blanket towards the unseen side from where Lee Hae-seong was sitting and called the cat almost pleadingly.
“It seems you can’t find the hole to come out.””Yuhaseong, who had only been watching Tiffany’s movements as she was making a fuss under the blanket, stood up as if to help.”
“No, it’s not!” It’s just for fun, so you don’t need to worry about it…!”
“……”I shook my head, but I couldn’t stop him.”
Tiffany peeked out from under the blanket that he had thrown off. Thinking it was playtime, the guy tilted his head in confusion, looked up in understanding, and quickly hid back under the blanket.
However, Lee Hae-sung did not search for Tiffany again and did not rummage through the blanket.
The corner of the poster for
Lee Hae-sung, who had been paused for a moment, completely pulled the blanket to one side. And I bent down to pull out the other posters layered under
He looked so angry that he couldn’t even start a conversation with me. It was a terrifying expression as if I had witnessed my partner’s infidelity.
However, I had to say something. Although I acknowledged that I “knew” about the tie and the card, it was different from this. I felt like he would immediately explode in anger, asking why I was imitating Choi Hong-seo even in this house.
This is… Because it’s being sold cheaply on the internet…”He tried to make a pitiful excuse, but it seemed that nothing was heard by his ears.”
A low-resolution print that cannot even be compared to the original poster he had given to Choi Hong-seo. He looked down at them in silence.
After a long time, his jaw muscles were stiff and hard as he struggled to swallow dry saliva.
“Do you want to continue the consultation?””He spoke in a voice that sounded like metal, as if he had forcibly torn through a tightly blocked throat.” It was a completely unexpected remark.
“…What?”If you don’t want to do it, then don’t do it anymore.””Consultation?””You didn’t want to do it anyway, and you were just forcing yourself to do it because of me.””Is it something I don’t have to do?””Finally, Lee Hae-sung, who had been looking down at the poster the whole time, turned his face this way.” However, what he was looking at was no longer the ‘Yoon Hye-an’ in front of him. I was looking at ‘Choi Hong-seo’ beyond that. I couldn’t explain it logically, but I just knew. I couldn’t help but know. I cannot forget the gaze of my lover looking at me.
He nodded his head several times and said in a muffled voice.
“You don’t have to do it.” Don’t do it.”When he looked down at the poster and then back this way, his eyes examined every corner of Yoon Hye-an’s face.” As if to say something, he took a deep breath and pursed his lips, tightly closing them as if swallowing his words, and in an instant, he turned his body sharply.
“I enjoyed the coffee.””I quietly listened to the sound of him picking up the jacket he had draped over the chair back and heading towards the front door.” The sound of footsteps wearing shoes suddenly stopped, and the area behind me became quiet.
“I apologize for causing trouble.”.. It’s a lie.”
“……”You were planning to torment me, weren’t you?”His voice was trembling. “You were planning to torment me, weren’t you?”‘ ― That was something I said to Choi Hong-seo. The day I first slept over at his house, in the guest room. To Choi Hong-seo, who was in his arms.
It felt like a signal he was sending, so I couldn’t ignore it. I slowly turned around and faced him. The words he wished for were returned to him exactly as the past Choi Hong-seo had said to him.
“If I do this.”.. Do you dislike it?His face contorted in pain. My cheeks trembled, and my eyes shook.
He spoke as if he were expelling the last breath remaining in his lungs.
“……Do you think you would dislike it?That was the last one. I could no longer face him and lowered my head.
The door opened, then closed again, and I could only hear the fading footsteps walking down the hallway towards the elevator.
I didn’t want to go quickly. I wanted to be together longer.
Aren’t you going to play with me? Weren’t we supposed to play together? Tiffany peeked out from between the blankets and looked up. I forced a smile while looking at that guy and then shifted my gaze.
Three posters spread out on the bed, torn and wrinkled.
The posters he had gifted to Choi Hong-seo were all original posters from the time of release, with premiums ranging from several hundred thousand won to as much as several million won. They were special products that looked as if they had just been printed yesterday, well-preserved like new.
However, what is rolling around on ‘Yoon Hye-an’s’ bed are low-quality scans… In other words, it was a counterfeit.
I thought that right now, the existence of ‘Yoon Hye-an’ might be like this poster. A role play that can clumsily soothe the longing for Choi Hong-seo, imitation, counterfeit… Fake.
The perfume he gave was also fake. 최홍서에게 주었던 것과 병만 똑같은, 내용물이 다른 Fake.
The current self was all fake. The ‘fake Choi Hong-seo’ trapped in Yoon Hye-an’s mask.
To tell her to stop counseling meant to say not to regain Yoon Hye-an’s memories. Telling Yoon Hye-an not to regain her memories was essentially the same as telling her to continue imitating Choi Hong-seo. I couldn’t tell if that was truly a fortunate and good thing, or if it was misfortune and a curse.
The clear thing is that as long as he wants, I have no choice but to stay by his side in the way he desires.
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