By Zephyria ■
“Thank you for your hard work! Thank you for your hard work!”
As the cameraman called “Okay,” Choi Hong-seo smiled brightly and bowed deeply.
The chief editor for today’s photoshoot quickly approached. He patted Choi Hong-seo’s back repeatedly, his expression one of satisfaction.
“The work today was excellent. Thank you, Hyean.”
“Thank you. I enjoyed it too. Please call me again.”
“Oh, of course! Please come again when
The General Manager, who was in charge of the photoshoot’s styling, also added praise as he took the jacket Choi Hong-seo was wearing.
“I heard the solo song Dong-ha released this time was written and composed by Hyean? I listen to it in my car every day these days. It’s so lovely and dreamy, perfect for the end of the year. Did you hear it playing during the shoot earlier? That was me playing it?”
“Hyean got so shy when his own song came on. Thanks to that, we got another cute shot.”
“Dong-ha really knows how to perform the song well. Thank you. Please listen to it a lot.”
Choi Hong-seo repeatedly bowed his head in response to the praise.
He felt more embarrassed when talk turned to his composing than when he was praised for his acting or photoshoots. He was still a rookie with only three released songs, so being treated as a composer felt quite awkward.
Even after taking a commemorative photo with the staff, the editor couldn’t let Choi Hong-seo go, expressing his regret.
“It’s Friday night, so it would have been great if Hyean could join the company dinner. But you have to go somewhere, right? What a shame.”
“Ah… I know. I’m very sorry too.”
“Ah, he must be so busy these days after finishing filming for the movie. He’s probably getting calls from everywhere. Let him go quickly.”
Thanks to the stylist stepping in, Choi Hong-seo was able to leave. He was already in a hurry, so he was grateful to her.
“I apologize. I will definitely join you next time.”
As he hurried into the dressing room to change, Choi Hong-seo first grabbed his phone. He needed to check if Lee Hae-sung had contacted him.
Choi Hong-seo’s expression brightened noticeably as he unbuttoned the cardigan he wore over his bare skin like a knit. A message and photos had arrived from the Carrot Seller.
Carrot Seller: The two of them have arrived and started drinking (9:02 PM)
Carrot Seller: The side dishes are tofu kimchi and seafood pancake (9:05 PM)
Carrot Seller: And talk about the Paris apartment they’ll be living in (9:06 PM)
Carrot Seller: Ah… listening to couples talk is this painful (9:31 PM)
Carrot Seller: I don’t often have to listen to boring stories, so I didn’t realize (9:33 PM)
Carrot Seller: Should I brag about the photoshoot pics Hong-seo sent me too? (9:35 PM)
Carrot Seller: Holding back though lol (9:35 PM)
Carrot Seller: Tofu kimchi, it’s Hong-seo’s favorite, so I’m thinking about it more ^^ (9:38 PM)
Carrot Seller: I want to see you soon (9:38 PM)
Lee Hae-sung was currently in Gangnam meeting Jeong Ji-in and his partner, Yi-han.
It was a final gathering with Jeong Ji-in and Yi-han, who were moving to Paris, France, after closing their CNC in Korea.
Lee Hae-sung, who had just returned that evening after a week-long business trip to North America, had to go straight to the meeting place from the airport. Their departure date was the day after tomorrow, and this was the only time they had to meet before then.
At the end of the messages, Lee Hae-sung had attached a photo of the side dishes he took himself, as well as a selfie of the three of them drinking, also taken by Lee Hae-sung.
The three people in the photo looked comfortable and happy.
Seeing them brought a smile to his face, but at the same time, there was a dull throbbing.
It was a feeling of apology and pity for Lee Hae-sung, who couldn’t easily say ‘I have a partner too’ while spending time with a sweet couple. And the loneliness of not being able to stand proudly before Jeong Ji-in, one of the few people in the world who had been alive and loved ‘Choi Hong-seo’.
However, these feelings didn’t last long or make him feel depressed. What more could he ask for? To wish for more would be excessive greed.
Choi Hong-seo quickly changed his clothes and rushed out of the studio without even removing his makeup.
Even though he was rushing without washing his face, he couldn’t meet him immediately. He felt impatient. This was the first time he had been apart for a week since his ‘comeback’, so his heart fluttered.
As soon as he settled into the back seat of the van, he sent a reply.
Me: Your selfie skills have really improved a lot (9:45 PM)
Me: I’ll praise you later (9:45 PM)
Me: I finished my shoot safely. I’m leaving now (9:46 PM)
He expected a slow reply since it was a meeting after a long time, but a response came back immediately.
Carrot Seller: You finished sooner than expected? As expected of a photoshoot master^^ (9:48 PM)
Carrot Seller: I’m so curious how you’ll praise me? (9:50 PM)
Carrot Seller: Did you eat? Aren’t you hungry? (9:51 PM)
Me: I ate the lunch box you prepared earlier (9:51 PM)
Carrot Seller: What time is it now? You probably only ate a little because you had to look good anyway (9:53 PM)
Me: I’m thinking of ordering fried chicken when I get home (9:54 PM)
Me: Because you worked hard today (9:55 PM)
Me: But are you drinking a lot tonight? (9:55 PM)
Carrot Seller: Why? Do you want to see me soon?^^ (9:57 PM)
Me: I do… but still, it’s the last time seeing Hyung Ji-in (9:59 PM)
Me: Take your time and spend quality time with them (9:59 PM)
Carrot Seller: We’ll shower together tonight (10:04 PM)
Carrot Seller: I don’t plan on getting so drunk that we can’t do that (10:05 PM)
Me: How do you feel about Hyung? (10:07 PM)
Carrot Seller: Hyung? Which Hyung?^^ (10:08 PM)
Me: Hyung Ji-in. Not Hyung Haesung. (10:10 PM)
Carrot Seller: He seems happy. (10:10 PM)
Carrot Seller: I wonder if I’m making our Hong-seo as happy as he is. Enough to make me self-reflect (10:12 PM)
Me: Don’t have those kinds of reflections (10:12 PM)
Me: Hyung Haesung is invincible (10:12 PM)
Me: People will start complaining if we only message (10:13 PM)
Me: See you at home♡ (10:13 PM)
It still took courage to add the final heart. After repeatedly typing and deleting it because he thought it didn’t suit him, he decided that if Lee Hae-sung was happy doing something that didn’t suit him, then it was good enough.
Just as he was about to put down his phone, thinking Lee Hae-sung would now focus on his drinking session, the screen lit up again.
Carrot Seller: ♡♡ (10:14 PM)
Receiving one heart and returning two, Choi Hong-seo’s lips twitched as he tried to suppress a smile.
Lately, Yong-jae’s questioning had become persistent, asking if he was dating because he sometimes had a huge grin while looking at his phone.
Nearly a year had passed since the first filming of
In the meantime, Lee Hae-sung and Choi Hong-seo had moved from Bundang to UN Village.
It was where Choi Hong-seo had lived.
It was where Lee Hae-sung had preserved all of Choi Hong-seo’s traces.
Returning to that place felt the most natural.
Every time the van, driven by Yong-jae, passed through familiar alleys after work and entered the underground parking lot of this house, his heart would swell with the realization of ‘having returned’. Even after nearly a year since moving into this house, that feeling of emotion had not faded.
He pulled up the hood of his sweatshirt, layered over his jacket, slung his crossbody bag diagonally across his chest, and waved goodbye to Yong-jae.
Taking the elevator up, he entered the password and opened the door, and the sensor at the entrance lit up.
Niya.
Tiffany was the first to greet him. Before even taking off his shoes, he crouched down and picked up Tiffany.
“Tiffany. Was everything okay? Did you poop well?”
The cat rubbed its nose against his without any sign of annoyance.
Unlike in Bundang, now hired staff came and went to manage the house and take care of Tiffany. It seemed they had left about 30 minutes before Choi Hong-seo’s arrival today.
“Just a moment. I’ll send a message saying I’ve arrived… and then I’ll give you a treat.”
Choi Hong-seo took out his phone and skillfully sent a message with one hand, then headed to the kitchen.
He placed his bag on the island counter, washed his hands at the kitchen sink, and took out a treat.
While he did this, Tiffany followed him closely, rubbing against his calves.
“Do you like me that much?”
Nyaa.
“You like the treat, don’t you?”
The cat rushed to the treat without even answering. As he stroked Tiffany’s back, he glanced at the clock on the wall. It was already past 11 o’clock.
“They started drinking around 9… it should be past midnight, right?”
Tiffany, who had been burying its nose in the treat, lifted its head and looked at him. The cat tilted its head, licking its lips, its face so cute that he let out a small laugh.
“Yes, no. Eat up.”
After finishing the treat, Tiffany lay down between Choi Hong-seo’s legs as he sat with his legs stretched out on the floor. He stroked the cat from its neck to its tail, sitting like that for a while. Checking his phone every 30 seconds.
“You said to spend plenty of time with them, acting all cool, but look at you now.”
Tiffany merely yawned lazily with an indifferent expression, as if it didn’t care.
He got up, thinking he might as well try to work, even if he couldn’t focus. Tiffany, whose comfortable spot had been taken, followed Choi Hong-seo with a displeased meow.
At the very end of the hallway.
The room Lee Hae-sung used as his bedroom was now used by both of them as their shared bedroom, and the master room, which had been Choi Hong-seo’s room before his ‘comeback’, was used as a study. Apart from removing the bed, the room was almost the same as before.
He first lit an incense stick and turned on the desktop computer. Even then, he couldn’t sit at the desk and kept moving around restlessly, picking things up and putting them down.
Tiffany seemed to notice that he was different from usual. Sitting on the sofa, the cat tilted its head.
“Am I this nervous because I haven’t seen him for a week? Doesn’t it seem like I’m pretending?”
Choi Hong-seo, who had been flipping through a few manga books in front of the bookshelf, asked this as he turned to Tiffany.
Just then, the phone on the desk rang. Both Choi Hong-seo and Tiffany’s gazes turned towards it. The caller was Lee Hae-sung.
“Yes. It’s me.”
[Did you order chicken?]
“Not yet.”
[Then wait for 30 minutes? So we can eat together.]
“Oh? Are you coming already?”
[The two of them are leaving soon, so they’re busy with various things. And I just got back today.]
“You must be tired, right?”
[Hmm… that too. But when I met them, I couldn’t really focus on what they were saying. I wanted to see you quickly.]
Choi Hong-seo, who had placed the manga books back on the bookshelf, raised his gaze.
The walls were covered with movie posters, so densely that there was barely any space left.
“Actually, me too. I can’t focus on anything.”
[……]
There was a brief silence on the other end of the line, followed by a light, sweet sigh.
[A week-long business trip. It’s truly unbearable. I should suggest it to the company.]
He said it as a joke, but neither of them laughed.
His heart beat faster at the thought of seeing him sooner than expected. After ending the call, Choi Hong-seo, who was about to leave the study, paused for a moment. Then, he looked over the posters on the wall again.
The works they had watched together over the past year varied in genre, director, nationality of actors, and release year.
But they all had one thing in common.
They were all happy endings.
Lee Hae-sung had started taking photos again and enjoyed watching movies like he used to. However, there was still one thing. He still never watched movies that didn’t have a happy ending.
The desire not to lose the happiness he had so painstakingly held onto.
Choi Hong-seo understood that careful devotion well.
Suddenly, he missed him uncontrollably.
It wasn’t the pretty excitement or fluttering he had felt moments ago, but a longing that felt like overwhelming sorrow.
He had convinced himself, and Lee Hae-sung, that he was fine. But he could finally admit that this past week had been agonizingly long.
Taking in each poster, Choi Hong-seo called out to Tiffany, who was lying on the sofa.
“Tiffany, let’s go. Let’s go pick up Daddy.”
■
As his smiling face appeared through the opening door, radiating warmth.
Choi Hong-seo couldn’t look him directly in the eye.
His heart was in turmoil, and his cheeks and ears burned. His gaze fell to his feet. He couldn’t understand himself.
Tiffany, in his arms, struggled to get to him. Even as he handed Tiffany over to him, Choi Hong-seo’s gaze remained fixed around his chest.
“Welcome back? You must be very tired.”
He was wearing a striped tie. It was a gift Choi Hong-seo had given him before this business trip. If there was one thing Choi Hong-seo wanted, it was to fill his entire tie collection with gifts from himself.
“It’s only been a week. Is Tiffany your priority?”
His voice held a hint of disappointment.
“I wanted to hold our Baby first.”
This was the first time they had been apart after being so completely settled together. They hadn’t slept separately for a single day in over a year.
He realized how much he had spoiled himself.
As he was held by him, breathing in his scent and receiving his warm kisses, he felt tears welling up.
“I… I feel strange. I’m going to get some air for a moment.”
He fled, feeling too bewildered by himself.
As soon as he stepped out onto the living room balcony and closed the door behind him, the tears he had been holding back flowed. The hot tears were instantly cooled by the cold wind. He quickly wiped them away with the back of his hand.
“I’m crazy… I’m insane… Why am I crying?”
Lee Hae-sung had been the one constantly saying he missed him, whether through video calls or messages during the week. Choi Hong-seo, as always, had woken up at the same time, exercised, fed Tiffany and cleaned its litter box, worked diligently, and followed his usual routine. So he hadn’t noticed his own emotions at all.
Even in the cold wind blowing from the Han River, his heart didn’t calm down.
He rested his hands on the icy railing and gazed at the night view across the river.
He heard Lee Hae-sung’s footsteps approaching the balcony cautiously, but he couldn’t look towards him. Secretly wiping away his tears again, he turned his head.
His long arms wrapped around his waist from behind. It was a gentle movement, as if to say not to be surprised.
Warm skin touched his cheek. His scent enveloped his entire body.
“Do you not like this old man anymore?”
“Don’t say that.”
His arms, which had been cautious, tightened around his waist. He slid his head down, burying his lips and nose deep into his neck, inhaling his scent deeply.
“You were the one who avoided me first, Hong-seo?”
“I’ve become too foolish.”
“What?”
“It was just a week-long business trip. I don’t know why I’m crying over something like this. I’ve become a fool.”
“I like it though?”
“I feel like I’m getting weaker… I don’t like that.”
Lee Hae-sung gently took Choi Hong-seo’s hand, which was still gripping the cold railing. He enclosed both hands and squeezed them tightly, sharing warmth.
“Originally, children cry more when there’s someone to comfort them. Someone to run to and say, ‘I fell,’ ‘I’m upset.’ That means Hong-seo has someone like that now. So, I like it?”
“……”
“Were you that upset because you couldn’t see me for a week?”
As he nodded, the person pressed tightly against his back let out a low laugh.
“Let me see. You didn’t wash off your makeup to show me, did you?”
“……”
No longer stubborn, he turned around to face him.
“My makeup is all smudged, isn’t it?”
“No, it’s almost the same?”
His warmth, as familiar as his own body temperature, enveloped his cheeks.
“I missed you.”
“Me too.”
“I wanted to be with you quickly.”
“…Me too.”
This time, he wrapped his arms around his back first. Cold lips traced Lee Hae-sung’s face, searching for his mouth. The lips that met soon grew warm. They shared their lips and body heat, trying to fill the time they were apart and the longing that came with it.
Nights spent waking from nightmares still existed. Sometimes it was Lee Hae-sung, and sometimes it was Choi Hong-seo’s turn. The difference now was the sense of relief upon waking.
They would take in the sight of each other sleeping beside them, bring a finger under their nose to check their breath, and then slip into the other’s embrace to confirm their warmth. Only then could they drift back into a pleasant sleep.
Though he had acted indifferent, he was still a little afraid of falling asleep and waking up without him beside him. He decided to accept it.
Lee Hae-sung, pulling away, held Choi Hong-seo tightly within his coat and embraced him.
“Actually, I made a bombshell declaration today.”
“A bombshell declaration?”
“That I’m seeing someone.”
“……”
“When the two people invited me to their place in Paris, I said I had someone I wanted to bring with me.”
Choi Hong-seo looked up at Lee Hae-sung, too surprised to speak. But his face remained serene.
“Y-you told My acquaintance, Hyung like that?”
“I know you’re afraid to show yourself as you are now to Ji-in and introduce me as your lover.”
Jeong Ji-in knew that Choi Hong-seo and Lee Hae-sung were lovers.
To someone who knew that, the current ‘Yoon Hye-an’ could appear as someone imitating Choi Hong-seo. Just as Lee Hae-sung had initially seen him.
Or, he might think that Lee Hae-sung regarded ‘Yoon Hye-an’ as a replacement for Choi Hong-seo.
It was because of such thoughts that Choi Hong-seo had been afraid to face Jeong Ji-in, and Lee Hae-sung knew that well.
“But the more I’ve known Ji-in, the more certain I’ve become. I don’t expect him to recognize Hong-seo, but he’s someone who will eventually recognize the trust and devotion we have for each other.”
Feeling his strong arms around his back, Choi Hong-seo nodded. His lips, smiling softly, touched his forehead. It was warm.
“I want to formally introduce you as my lover.”
“I want to as well.”
They embraced each other tightly once more. They confirmed their existence and the moment they were together.
Without this person, life’s meaning fades. Even when engrossed in each other’s work, drawing their own orbits, they must always return to this person’s side.
At one time, he had considered such love as weakness.
But the love he learned again upon returning was not like that.
Having planted a part of himself within the other, it was a love with no choice.
The Seoul night view visible over Lee Hae-sung’s shoulder was brilliant. On the clear night sky, a few stars had appeared.
The unknown universe was infinitely mysterious and beautiful.
He was grateful for, savored, and reveled in the fact that he could call him with his voice and hold him with his arms. He was alive.
Alive, on this land, by his side,
Looking at the universe from Earth.