By Zephyria 
111
But the sword twitched with a jjing- sound, then bounced right off.
Ho-eun, having received his own power back in full, was pushed back weakly along with the sword. The upright sword came towards Ho-eun’s forehead. It looked ready to split Ho-eun’s head open, not the Devouring Ghoul’s.
Ho-eun, startled, froze stiff. Tae-muk, who was nearby, grabbed the sword with his bare hand to stop it.
“General!”
Ho-eun, surprised, called out to Tae-muk as if shouting. But Tae-muk, with an indifferent expression, pushed the sword to the ground. Ho-eun examined his hand, but it wasn’t cut, nor was there any blood. Ho-eun belatedly realized that Tae-muk was holding the back of the blade, not the edge.
He breathed a sigh of relief.
“This doesn’t seem like it’ll work.”
Tae-muk tried to take the sword away. But Ho-eun grabbed the hilt tightly with both hands and resisted.
“No. I’ll try again, I’ll try again.”
“……”
“Just once.”
“……”
Tae-muk stared at Ho-eun for a moment, then let go of the sword without another word.
Ho-eun cautiously approached the Devouring Ghoul. The distance was clearly closer than before. Tae-muk’s eyes narrowed sharply at that. With his long legs, he strode past Ho-eun and stepped on the Devouring Ghoul’s snout. Its gaping maw snapped shut.
“……”
Ho-eun, standing in front of the Devouring Ghoul, raised the sword upside down, unlike before. And after aligning the tip of the sword with the center of the Devouring Ghoul’s Helmet Bone, he plunged it straight down.
Ppigeuk.
A very insignificant sound rang out. The tip of the sword didn’t pierce the Helmet Bone at all. Not even a hairline crack appeared. Only the thin leather covering the Helmet Bone was scratched and peeled off.
“……”
Ho-eun, frowning, raised the sword higher than before. Then he plunged it down again. He plunged, and plunged again. But it was a completely useless action. Only unpleasant sounds like kkik, kkeuk, kkik, kigeek rang out.
“……”
The area around Ho-eun’s eyes darkened. He never thought killing the Devouring Ghoul would be easy, but he also didn’t know it would be this difficult. Because every man, when he does something, has an unreasonable confidence that it will proceed excellently. Moreover, Ho-eun was even more disappointed because he had dreamed that he would be of great use someday.
Ho-eun, biting his lower lip with an anxious face, turned his head sharply. There, the Devouring Ghoul’s body was sprawled out. The body, sprawled out like a puddle, looked softer than the Helmet Bone. Maybe his sword would go in.
“……Can’t you kill it by cutting off the Devouring Ghoul’s neck?”
“Try it.”
Tae-muk said indifferently, taking his foot off the Devouring Ghoul’s maw. Ho-eun dragged the sword towards the Devouring Ghoul’s body. Although its neck was already disgustingly torn, he thought he could try cutting below it as practice.
Ho-eun raised the sword high like before, then struck down with all his might. It looked as if he was chopping with an axe. But.
Teodeok.
A different sound than before was heard.
“……”
The irregularly wrinkled skin of the Devouring Ghoul was thick and tough. Ho-eun’s sword was merely buried between the wrinkles, unable to penetrate it.
Ho-eun belatedly recalled that Gil-sang hadn’t been able to strike the Devouring Ghoul’s neck in one blow either, and had struck it three or four times. But to think that he, of all people, could cut off the Devouring Ghoul’s neck. He was foolish. It would take three or four days of sawing non-stop.
“……”
Ho-eun’s hand holding the sword loosened.
Is it impossible for me after all? Did I want too much, with this weak body? What should I do now? Do I have to continue living uselessly like this? Hiding behind others and being cared for?
Being a protected being seems special and great at first glance, but when you actually become that, it’s not all that.
A being that needs to be protected is… a ‘burden’.
A terrible burden that holds back Tae-muk and the Crimson Rain Brigade soldiers, gnaws at their nerves, and may even take their lives.
When I ran away from Ramjae Town, I thought that I had to live, that it was for Tae-muk, for the country, but in the end, I couldn’t deny that I was a burden.
I am Tae-muk’s Bondmate, yes. I can be helpful to Tae-muk even with this shabby body. But wouldn’t it be better if I could do my part as a soldier? Then Gil-sang and Seong-im wouldn’t have to risk their lives for me later.
So I tried to do anything, but it seemed impossible for me after all.
The tip of Ho-eun’s sword fell to the floor with a thud. He was just fiddling with the sword hilt with a gloomy face.
“Next.”
Tae-muk said.
“……Yes?”
Ho-eun looked at Tae-muk with a dazed expression. But Tae-muk snatched the sword that Ho-eun was holding and handed him something else. It was a bow. Ho-eun received it blankly.
“Do you know how to shoot a bow?”
“Uh… no.”
Ho-eun shook his head. He was holding a sword for the first time, so there was no way he could have shot a bow.
“Come here.”
Tae-muk told him to come, but he actually came and stood behind Ho-eun. And holding Ho-eun’s wrists, he made him hold the bow with one hand and the arrow with the other. Then he showed him the posture by extending, pulling, and gathering Ho-eun’s arms.
“Hold the center of the bow here, and keep the arm holding the bow and the arm pulling the arrow in a straight line. And then just pull the bowstring.”
“How do I aim?”
“You have to look at the arrowhead.”
“Ah, yes, I understand.”
Tae-muk even nocked the arrow and then took a step back. The moment he disappeared from behind him, his body felt chilly. Ho-eun shrugged his shoulders once and then raised the bow. And holding the bow and bowstring in one hand, he aimed the arrowhead at the Devouring Ghoul’s head.
The posture was very awkward, but Ho-eun was still serious. He wanted to do well. He wanted to succeed.
He took a deep breath. And he pulled the bowstring with all his might.
Yes, he pulled.
He definitely pulled.
He definitely pulled, but.
The taut bowstring only bent slightly and didn’t budge. Even though he pulled as hard as he could, to the point where the tips of his fingers were fraying, nothing changed.
“……”
Ho-eun gritted his teeth and put more strength into his fingers. His fingers, pressed down by the bowstring, ached as if they were being sliced. Still, Ho-eun didn’t release the bowstring.
But at some point, the trembling arrow fell to the ground with a tuk- sound. It was such a weak fall that the arrowhead didn’t even stick into the ground and just sprawled out limply.
“……”
Ho-eun blinked. Then he slowly looked at Tae-muk.
“The bow… seems to be broken.”
“Bows break or snap, they don’t malfunction.”
Tae-muk calmly beheaded Ho-eun’s hope.
“……”
Ho-eun slowly lowered the bow. He didn’t expect to be good at shooting a bow. But he didn’t even expect to be unable to pull the bowstring. It was terribly bleak. He hated his body so much that he wanted to cut off his arms and legs.
At that moment, Tae-muk strode closer, crushing the grass.
“Give it here.”
“……”
Ho-eun gripped the bow tightly. He didn’t want to give it. He wanted to try more. But there was really no possibility at all, so he couldn’t even be stubborn. Ho-eun slowly handed the bow to Tae-muk. As he did, he muttered to himself.
“Do you… think I’m pathetic?”
“……”
“I can’t do anything…”
Ho-eun thought that Tae-muk would naturally laugh at him. Like he used to do with his sarcasm and ridicule. But Tae-muk bent down to pick up the fallen arrow himself and asked back.
“What are you supposed to do?”
“……Yes?”
“Who told you to kill the Devouring Ghoul? That’s not your job.”
“But……”
Isn’t everyone else doing it except me? Everyone else can do it, but I’m the only one who can’t.
Ho-eun had countless things he wanted to say, but he chose to keep his mouth shut. He knew that the surging words were just tantrums. It would be even more so in the eyes of someone as strong as Tae-muk.
Regardless of what kind of despair was painted on Ho-eun’s face, Tae-muk, with an expressionless face, twirled the arrow he had picked up between his fingers and played with it.
“Why are you trying to do something you weren’t told to do? You could be sucking my cock instead of wasting time-”
“Ack!”
Ho-eun shouted out loud. His shout echoed emptily in the field. The arrow even fell from Tae-muk’s hand.
Ho-eun’s eyes widened in surprise after shouting so loudly. He didn’t even realize he was shouting. His body just reacted to the word ‘cock’.
“……”
Tae-muk looked at Ho-eun as if he was dumbfounded. Then he raised one eyebrow and said again.
“You don’t want to? Then I can suck your cock-”
“Aaaack!”
Ho-eun shouted again. This shout sounded like a scream. Tae-muk chuckled in disbelief. Ho-eun looked around. There was only Tae-muk and him, so it was unclear whose eyes he was looking at. After looking at the eyes of the moon, the wind, and the forest for a while, Ho-eun scolded Tae-muk in a small voice.
“Please refrain from such language outside!”
“Then it’s okay inside?”
“No!”
“What the fuck do you want me to do.”
“Just…, a little…, decorum…, a little…”
Ho-eun scratched his forehead, eyebrows, and eyelids with his fingernails as if he was in pain. Red marks appeared on his white face. Tae-muk’s brow furrowed sharply for a moment. He strode towards Ho-eun and grabbed his slender wrist, pulling it down.
“Do I still look like I have any decorum to you?”
“……”
Ho-eun stared up at Tae-muk like that. The words that he should keep some decorum since he didn’t have any rose to his throat, but he barely suppressed them. No matter what, he couldn’t say such presumptuous words to his superior.