By Zephyria Choi Hong-seo’s gaze slipped to the table once more. His breath, having lost its composure, grew rough.
“After the team disbanded, I took any job, even minor roles, without hesitation. There was no time to despair.”
CEO Lim had also stepped in to persuade Yoon Hye-an to stay with the team. However, Yoon Hye-an was a person who felt no need to choose the ‘path of mutual success’ when he had a ‘path advantageous to himself’.
It was a blessing in disguise for Park Dong-ha that, according to the contract terms, Yoon Hye-an had to cover ‘Titan’s’ remaining investment. At least he would receive settlements for the work done. Yoon Hye-an’s sponsor paid the remaining investment sum to ‘Titan’ all at once, and afterward, Yoon Hye-an brought in quite a substantial profit for ENA for a short period. In the end, it wasn’t a bad outcome for CEO Lim either. After all, Lim Sang-jin was in the business of making a profit, not charity.
Swallowing dryly, his mouth and throat felt parched. As if reading his thirst, CEO Lim took a bottle of water from the mini-fridge in the corner. Choi Hong-seo, accepting the casually offered water, managed only one or two sips, not much.
CEO Lim, slumping into the seat opposite, lit a new cigarette.
“Obviously, the other guys besides Dong-ha don’t think highly of you either. In the beginning, they flattered you because you got your name out there thanks to your sponsor, but in the end, you dumped them.”
Choi Hong-seo was also a former idol group member. He knew well how critical member departures or changes could be for both popular and less popular groups.
CEO Lim narrowed his eyes as he exhaled smoke.
“No, actually, Park Dong-ha, who was the most desperate for money, resents you less than the others.”
That was an unexpected piece of information. Choi Hong-seo, who had been squeezing the water bottle like a vice, looked up at CEO Lim.
“Even when he knelt before you, he pleaded, ‘Let’s break off the sponsorship and work hard together to rise.’ That’s what he begged.”
His eyes stung from the cigarette smoke CEO Lim was exhaling. Blinking several times, Choi Hong-seo quietly, fearfully asked.
“Then what did I… what did I say to Dong-ha?”
“Your pants.”
“What?”
“They’re new Louis Vuitton, and I didn’t want my pants to get wrinkled.”
CEO Lim said, sitting at an angle and exhaling smoke, his voice tinged with bitterness. A moment of silence followed. Only the sound of Lim Sang-jin inhaling and exhaling smoke could be heard. Choi Hong-seo thought it sounded like the breath of a large beast curled up asleep.
Cough.
CEO Lim picked up the ashtray, preparing to spit. Ptooey.
“Did I… did I practice hard?”
“……Did you?”
Setting down the ashtray, he looked up askance.
It seemed he hadn’t practiced hard. Choi Hong-seo just wanted to confirm.
Looking past CEO Lim’s sturdy shoulders, he gazed out the window. Instead of the glamorous cityscape people associate with Gangnam, he saw the shabby signs of shops in old buildings across the alley. Used luxury goods bought, job placement, foreign employment specialists…
It was completely different from the dazzling Seoul cityscape he had seen from the hotel room Lee Hae-sung had invited him to in his previous life. Even though it was the same Gangnam, only about 20 minutes away.
From afar, to nearby. Focusing on CEO Lim, Choi Hong-seo asked with some difficulty.
“Was I… that bad.”
What should he say? Choi Hong-seo, choosing his words, finally settled on ‘that bad’.
“Well, honestly, I can’t say you were a good person.”
The stub, now short, looked even smaller between CEO Lim’s large fingers.
“You were like a machine running solely on desire.”
“……”
“As if you only felt alive when you were chasing and fulfilling it.”
Lim Sang-jin might have been both a bystander and the greatest understander of Yoon Hye-an’s life. A bystander who understood but didn’t interfere. But could he be held responsible for not actively guiding another person’s life, simply by not interfering?
“Still, President, you handled various things as my guardian while I was in a coma.”
“It was all just paying the hospital bills month by month with the money you had left.”
“Even so. If I had become an unclaimed person, the hospital might have euthanized me before I woke up.”
“Poison Mushroom.”
CEO Lim said, pressing another cigarette butt into the overflowing ashtray.
“When I first saw you, I had that thought. You looked so beautiful and sleek on the outside, but I figured you wouldn’t be diligent, and your difficult temper was obvious… I thought you might cause trouble if I took you in. Yet, I felt a certain responsibility for bringing you in to be our center.”
Even though he wasn’t smoking anymore, silence filled the air, thick with the acrid smoke.
The day he visited Park Dong-ha’s apartment with Yong-jae. Choi Hong-seo had stared for a long time at Park Dong-ha’s family photo. A rural house in Gyeonggi Province, which Park Dong-ha had bought with a loan for half the price, presumably a cozy home his family had dreamed of.
“You probably don’t remember, Hyung. My dad was very sick, because of the accident.”
At that moment, Park Dong-ha probably wanted to say:
‘You don’t remember? After I begged you to save me, you left the team without batting an eye, and I had to live through hell for a while because of it.’
He seemed to have heard everything he wanted to hear. There was no twist for Yoon Hye-an. It was a life that truly fit the description ‘faithful to desire’. Still, at least, the fact that he sought out sponsors of his own volition was true, so perhaps that was… fortunate. Choi Hong-seo found it difficult to even manage a bitter smile.
“Talking like this today, it really seems like all your past memories are gone.”
Just as he was about to get up, CEO Lim spoke first.
“Your expression, your tone of voice, not to mention the fleeting changes in your eyes… there’s nothing that says ‘Yoon Hye-an’ anymore.”
As if witnessing a supernatural phenomenon that defied common sense, CEO Lim muttered with an expression of admiration-like curiosity.
“Even if you lost your memory, can a person change this much?”
Even so, absolutely no one would imagine that another person’s soul had entered Yoon Hye-an’s body. Yoon Hye-an, who woke up from unconsciousness, had lost all his memories, and because of that, he had become a different person. That was a much more plausible ‘common sense’.
“Thank you for your time. And thank you for telling me various things. Then.”
Putting down the water bottle, Choi Hong-seo glanced at the half-eaten apple on the table before standing up. As he was about to open the door and leave, CEO Lim’s voice came from behind him.
“When I brought you in as the last member, Dong-ha was the only one who welcomed you without any prejudice.”
“……”
“He thought that with a visual member like you, the team would do well.”
When he turned around, CEO Lim was half-turned, looking out the window.
“He might resent you, but he’s not the kind of guy who can hate someone endlessly. As far as I know.”
Choi Hong-seo hoped CEO Lim was right. But he couldn’t forget Park Dong-ha’s eyes, burning with animosity towards ‘Yoon Hye-an’.
“I thought your way was wrong. I thought you could succeed through honest means, even if it was slow and took a long time, so there was no need for such dirty tactics. But that wasn’t the case. No matter how much you tried and waited, you might not even get the chance here.”
Park Dong-ha seemed to have reached the point of almost believing Yoon Hye-an’s claim of not remembering. But seeing Yoon Hye-an ‘seducing’ Lee Hae-sung, just like in the past, he must have thought it was a lie. Because Yoon Hye-an was the kind of person who would do that, just like everyone he had met.
As he stepped into the hallway, the waiting bodyguard approached.
“The Vice President has arrived. Shall we go down?”
“Here?”
Choi Hong-seo, lost in thought, quickly pulled out his phone.
Carrot Seller: Ah… what should I do? I finished all my business in Hannam-dong but still have time? (04:41 PM)
Carrot Seller: Can I go over there and wait? (04:42 PM)
Carrot Seller: Looks like they’re in the middle of a conversation. They’ll probably tell me not to come if they see the message, so I’ll just leave. (05:03 PM)
Carrot Seller: Arrived in front of the building. (05:28 PM)
Carrot Seller: Come to my car ^^ (05:29 PM)
Carrot Seller: Hong-seo said he’d go alone. (05:35 PM)
Carrot Seller: I might get scolded for showing up without permission. (05:37 PM)
Carrot Seller: The old man is waiting, trembling. (05:38 PM)
It was around the time of practice for ‘Layered’s new single, which was also their last.
The messages left when Lee Hae-sung came to the practice room were very similar.
Ah…
In an instant, a sharp headache, like being poked in the temple with an ice pick, surged through him. It hurt so much, it felt more like a sharp toothache than a headache. Choi Hong-seo pressed his temple with his palm and leaned his shoulder against the hallway wall.
“Are you feeling dizzy?”
A bodyguard immediately approached and offered support.
“I just have a slight migraine.”
“We’ll take you to the hospital right away. Let’s inform the Vice President and go together.”
“No. I’m fine. I’m not about to collapse, it’s just a headache.”
Choi Hong-seo denied it firmly and removed his hand from his temple to show he was okay.
Until now, he had been happy when they shared the same words as before. It felt like he was showing him more proof that he was Choi Hong-seo, and he was overwhelmed with nostalgia for the past. It was like a precious code that allowed them to recognize each other.
But now, a fear that time was being rewound washed over him.
Choi Hong-seo didn’t wait for the elevator and ran into the emergency exit, taking the stairs down. The bodyguard followed quickly. When he roughly pushed open the main door on the first floor, Lee Hae-sung’s sedan was right there. He quickened his pace as if running and got into the back seat.
Lee Hae-sung, who had been watching Choi Hong-seo and the bodyguard approach, looked surprised. The moment he saw Lee Hae-sung’s face, Choi Hong-seo wrapped his arms around his waist. Burying his nose and lips in his shoulder, he deeply inhaled his scent. Another of Lee Hae-sung’s aides was in the driver’s seat, but he didn’t care.
“What’s wrong? Did something happen inside?”
Lee Hae-sung asked with concern, gently hugging his back in return.
“Should I go up and meet Lim Sang-jin?”
Choi Hong-seo shook his head and said in a small voice.
“I want to be alone with you. Is that okay?”
With his arms still around Choi Hong-seo’s back, Lee Hae-sung lowered his voice towards the driver’s seat.
“We’ll move on our own, so you return with the VIP security vehicle.”
“Understood, Vice President.”
After the sound of the driver’s door opening and closing, silence filled the car.
Lee Hae-sung waited without asking anything. He gently stroked Choi Hong-seo’s back as if soothing a crying baby. But this time, even his tenderness didn’t seem like it would easily calm his emotions.
“Old man…”
“Mm.”
“Vice President.”
“Ah, Hong-seo.”
“Haesung-ssi.”
“…Yes, Hong-seo-ssi.”
“Why did I wake up in a body like this?”
“……”
Lee Hae-sung’s hand, which had been stroking his back, stopped. Then, he tightened the arm he had around Choi Hong-seo’s body and pulled him in for a strong embrace.