By Zephyria The next day. As soon as I entered the dining room to eat breakfast, I was very surprised.
The dining table I originally used could seat six adults, but today, a round 2-person table, not much different in size from a tea table, was placed in the dining room. Did the Young Lady request it separately? I suppose so.
The table had become significantly smaller, so I could see the Young Lady’s face more closely and hear her whispering voice better. With her fair cheeks so close to my nose, I kept feeling thirsty and gulping down water. Even though I had spent all last night thinking about what to say today, my mind felt so hot that I forgot what I had intended to say first.
What could I talk about?
Stories like how the grape harvest was particularly good this year, or how we would hire more Water Spirits to prepare for times without rain, would not hold the Young Lady’s great interest. I had also heard that the Duke’s estate held charity parties every month; perhaps we could suggest doing something like that.
While I was contemplating, Lady Seiren opened the conversation with a story about Michael.
“Did you see it too? Michael hugging the sword he received as a birthday present even when he sleeps.”
“⋯Excuse me? Ah, yes. I saw.”
Was it only when he slept? Michael carried his sword twenty-four hours a day, even when he went to bathe. Since there was no major harm in it, no one tried to dissuade Michael from his stubbornness, so Michael went around with his sword dangling from his waist while eating, walking, or eating cookies. It was a relief that he at least unbuckled it from his waist and laid it beside him when he slept.
I often visited Michael’s room before falling asleep to check if the child was sleeping well. Thanks to that, it was something I already knew, but the Young Lady seemed to have just found out. I should have told her beforehand. If I had spoken first, Lady Seiren would have been surprised and smiled.
The Young Lady sighed with a very worried expression.
“It’s good that he wields a sword, but I am concerned about his hygiene. How about buying him a sword stand that can be placed next to his nightstand?”
“Ah⋯. That would be good. I will commission the workshop to make one of an appropriate height.”
“Which craftsman do you intend to ask? Do you have a furniture craftsman you particularly like?”
“⋯Well, um, ⋯actually, I don’t know his name. I always entrusted it to the butler, and he would procure good items.”
“Ah, I see. The wood furniture workshop within the Count’s estate must be skilled. Was our bed made by the same craftsman?”
“⋯Yes. Perhaps⋯. No, if there is a better craftsman, you can commission them separately.”
“No, no. But this time, when you purchase the sword stand, please be sure to find out the craftsman’s name.”
“Yes. I will.”
The Young Lady rolled her large eyes from side to side as if contemplating, then smiled bashfully. The silence that settled during the meal, which proceeded at a slightly slower pace than when Michael was present, felt somewhat embarrassing, so my gaze dropped. As I was cutting a potato on my plate with a knife, a large piece of meat was transferred onto my plate.
I obediently cut the meat further and put it in my mouth. Our eyes met, and we both smiled. This time, she was the one who spoke first.
“I had something like that too.”
“Something like that⋯. What was it?”
“A cherished item I carried around hugging every day. I received a rabbit doll as big as my torso for my fifth birthday. It was about my height, so I dressed it in my clothes and adorned it with my accessories. Every night, I slept with it wearing my pajamas.”
“⋯With the doll?”
“Yes, with the doll.”
⋯It must have been cute. Imagining a young Lady Seiren, looking just like Michael does now, rolling around on the bed hugging a pink rabbit doll, made me smile repeatedly. It felt as if everything I ate was sprinkled with sugar. Even though I don’t particularly like sweet things, it tasted good.
“What about you? What did you receive for your fifth birthday?”
“⋯I⋯. Received an encyclopedia.”
“What? Did you like books?”
It was awkward and embarrassing to talk about how boring and uninteresting my life had been. It was also a part of myself that I considered a weakness and did not reveal to others. However, in front of Seiren, the words came out quite easily.
“⋯No. It wasn’t like that. I was just⋯. A dull child who didn’t particularly like anything or dislike anything. When asked what I liked, I couldn’t answer⋯. My parents decided on a gift arbitrarily.”
“Is it still like that?”
“Yes?”
The Young Lady placed her cutlery down without a sound. In her eyes, which gazed intently at Ikyun, a slight disappointment and worry ripened and shone like dew drops on the edges of a wine glass. Lady Seiren asked again.
“Even now, you don’t know what you like?”
“No, I like you.”
“⋯Yes?”
I was more surprised by the words that came out reflexively.
Because I had kept those words in my heart for a long time, wanting to say them properly at least once, I was startled to realize I had answered so quickly to a similar sound. Startled, I tightened my grip on the fork. My sweaty palm felt slippery.
However, there was no way to take back the words I had spoken. Looking only at the tip of the Young Lady’s chin, I forced out my voice.
“⋯I like Lady Seiren.”
I had wanted to say it more seriously. I didn’t think it was something to blurt out absentmindedly during a meal. As if making excuses, I added more words.
“Of course, Michael too⋯. And.”
“⋯And?”
“Prodil Aster⋯ I like him too.”
“Why do you like him?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them.
“⋯Because he resembles your hair color.”
“What?”
Then the Young Lady laughed.
I suddenly lifted my head at her clear, loud laugh. A blush had spread across her fair cheeks. Her blue eyes, brimming with tears from laughing so hard, looked directly at me. As if she couldn’t believe it, she asked, “Really?” several times. I, half-dazed, repeatedly replied with a foolish sound, “Yes.”
“Really?” “Yes.” “Really?” “Yes.” After this exchange continued for a few moments, she said this.
“I like you too.”
“⋯Yes?”
“I like you too, William.”
“⋯.”
“I like that you believe babies are brought by bluebirds, that you’ve never met a woman in your life, and that your ears turn red every time you give a flower. I like it all very much.”
My breath hitched for a moment. I clearly heard her whisper from her tightly closed red lips.
“I was a bit stubborn because I didn’t want to say it first. But, you know. I love you. I hope you feel the same.”
“That’s.”
“That’s right. You probably already loved me, though.”
I wanted to say something more, but my lips wouldn’t open. Then, the Young Lady, who had been gazing intently at my face, reached out her fork and took a piece of flower-shaped carrot from my plate. The thin carrot piece was held between her lips, chewed, and disappeared without a trace. I just stared blankly.
Then she laughed again.
“Do you know that?”
“⋯What, what is it⋯.”
“It’s been three years since I moved to the main building, right?”
“Yes.”
“During that time, I’ve never locked my door.”
“⋯Gasp.”
“Today, come prepared.”
Her voice, which continued like a song, was cheerful, mischievous, and lovely. My fingertips and chest tingled together. My mouth just moved, and I kept feeling thirsty. I drank water, afraid I would wake from a dream, so I couldn’t do anything and held back again.
Then she pouted.
“You don’t like it?”
“No, no! I don’t⋯. I don’t. I will, I will go.”
“Yes.”
My god. Even the carrots tasted sweet.
Has there ever been a day in my life that felt this long?
I reviewed the monthly report on livestock count fluctuations, which was usually so easy and simple, seven times, yet I made a mistake with the numbers. I sent Gilbert away, telling him to go home early, preventing him from fussing about calling a doctor. I couldn’t suppress my fluttering heart.
Perhaps the suggestion to have dinner separately was Michael’s scheme, as my brother wanted. He must have known that I wouldn’t be able to do anything improper to her in front of Michael. No, that’s not right. Even so, a five-year-old child couldn’t have thought that far.
Feeling extremely anxious and uneasy, I spent the whole day just looking at the clock. As the sun rises, morning comes; as the moon rises, night arrives.
I thought I had cleared my mind completely, yet I barely remember how I spent the day, when I put Michael to bed, or how I bathed and changed clothes. Is it really okay for me to do this?
The moment I open the side door to my bedroom, which I had never opened before, feels unreal.
The doorknob was surprisingly cold. No, that’s not it. It’s because I’m feverish. My cheeks, ears, and hands are so hot that I keep wanting to look in the mirror. But I couldn’t let go of the doorknob I had already turned, so I carefully opened the door.
Lady Seiren was lying on the bed, covered with a blanket.
“⋯.”
“⋯.”
We didn’t exchange a single word.
I had dressed fully in a dress shirt and pants because I wanted to look good for the Young Lady, but she was not. As she gently sat up, I involuntarily gasped. Only a very thin ribbon strap rested on her white shoulder. Her loose-fitting slip was so thin it was almost transparent, revealing her insides. Her rounded bustline was clearly visible, and I quickly raised my gaze.
Seeing me struggling, unable to look below her neck yet constantly drawn to her, the Young Lady slightly lifted the blanket and sat on the edge of the bed. She stuck out her tongue slightly, smiling mischievously, her face no different from during the day, but her cheeks were flushed, and the end of her voice trembled slightly.
This tension isn’t mine alone.
“Are you going to make me wait longer?”
“⋯No, I’m not.”
I carefully climbed onto the bed. The Young Lady draped the blanket over my shoulders. Hesitantly, I gently placed my lips on the Young Lady’s cheek. The short, affectionate kiss she gave Mika, and Mika gave the Young Lady, made only a ‘smack’ sound and didn’t quite touch the skin. But mine was different.
Twice on her blushing cheek, once on her lips that always formed a graceful arc. And three times on her full lower lip. Each time I pulled away after a deep kiss, the Young Lady lost her smile. Her arms wrapped around my neck, and I held her waist, pulling her close. Noticing where my hands were heading, the Young Lady whispered mischievously.
“Don’t forget this time.”
“⋯Yes. I will never forget.”
I was stiff even with a single hug. She showed me how it was done with tender kisses that slid across my eyelids, the tip of my nose, and my jawline, and I melted uncontrollably. Each time I exhaled a trembling breath out of nervousness, the Young Lady giggled and stroked my shoulders and chest with her fingertips.
Lady Seiren’s tongue, like her hands, shoulders, and body, was small, soft, and tender. Our kiss, which started awkwardly with both of us being inexperienced, began to gain heat and explore each other. Our dry lips met and slowly became moist.
Her thin nightgown crumpled, reaching up to the Young Lady’s collarbone. We smiled every time our eyes met, embraced deeply every time our lips touched, and held back cries when our lower bellies touched and slid. Then, when our eyes met again, laughter erupted.
I firmly imprinted her onto my eyes, hands, and heart, filling me with overwhelming excitement. No matter how tired my body was, I couldn’t sleep from the sheer surprise and joy. I held her precious body and was blissfully happy for a long time, until the birds outside began to sing with the dawn.
Though I repeated to myself that I must never forget even a single moment, all those moments remained as deep brands. Now, even if I closed my eyes, I felt I could trace her and recognize her.
And, not long after, the Young Lady and I became close enough to call each other by pet names when we were alone.