By Zephyria After the meal, Yoon Joo-ho showed him how to use the dishwasher.
“Even a BB gun could handle this much.”
“I don’t want to hear that from someone who’s never even made a fried egg! If you can do it, of course, I can too. Though, you’ll probably be doing the dishes anyway.”
“What?”
“Can you cook?”
“Are you insisting that kimchi pot rice is cooking right now?”
“For someone who can’t even do that, it’s cooking. And if I cook, the dishes are naturally your responsibility.”
Standing side-by-side in the kitchen, dividing household chores, Song Hyun-soo felt a strange ticklish sensation. He felt like French toast, thoroughly soaked in sweet maple syrup. In other words, like a newlywed couple…
Even though it was his own thought, he couldn’t handle it, so Song Hyun-soo screamed inwardly. Rubbing his flushed nape, he coughed dryly.
After neatly stacking the dishes and starting the dishwasher, Yoon Joo-ho rummaged through capsules, seemingly to make coffee.
“Can you give me some clothes to change into? I want to shower.”
“Shower in the master bathroom and find something to wear there. It’s in the dresser drawer in the walk-in closet.”
“Me?”
“Do I have to bring it to you?”
“Ah, no. I’ll find something to wear. You go ahead with your business, Sunbae.”
Glancing back at Yoon Joo-ho, who was inserting a capsule into the machine and looking for a mug, Song Hyun-soo left the kitchen. The master bedroom door, which had a door lock, was not only unlocked but wide open.
He had showered in this house several times before, but each time, Yoon Joo-ho had prepared clothes for him in advance. Being told to find something to wear from the drawers felt like permission to get closer to him, and he couldn’t stop giggling as he brushed his teeth and showered.
He came out wearing only a towel around his waist, just like Yoon Joo-ho usually did, and started looking for clothes to wear. The new underwear, still in its packaging, was easy to find. But apart from that, everything was clothes with expensive brand tags. And they looked like they had only been worn once or twice.
Why are there only these kinds of clothes when they’re for wearing at home?
Looking for something more comfortable, he opened another drawer.
Unlike the other drawers, which were neatly organized, the bottom drawer was stuffed with a jumbled box of items.
What is this?
Lip gloss, half-used perfume, sunglasses, an old t-shirt…
It’s just a mess. Yoon Joo-ho is human too. Right, no matter how neat you are, everyone has a box where they just stuff things.
Among all the shiny new items in the walk-in closet, only the contents of that box had been touched. The t-shirt mixed in there looked the most worn.
Song Hyun-soo knew that shirt. It was from a series released by a famous brand a few years ago that had been a hit. Even online shopping malls were flooded with ‘fakes.’ The original product cost 700,000 or 800,000 won for a t-shirt. But it was an old item from a few years ago, so it looked moderately worn compared to the other clothes.
Song Hyun-soo pulled it over his head.
Oh, the size is okay.
Then, as Yoon Joo-ho always provided, he took out a pair of pajama pants and put his legs through them. Although the difference in height or build wasn’t huge, he clearly felt the gap when wearing Yoon Joo-ho’s clothes. The pajama pants, slightly loose at the waist and long in length, were just short enough not to drag on the floor when he wore slippers.
As he left the walk-in closet, Yoon Joo-ho, still wearing only a towel around his waist, stood with his back to him at the table by the floor-to-ceiling window.
“Huh? Did you shower in the guest bathroom? This is Sunbae’s bathroom. You should have showered here.”
“You’ll just complain again that it’s too much if I come at you from the bathroom.”
Yoon Joo-ho replied indifferently, his eyes fixed on the papers in his hand. Come at me… Heated by the implication of sex, Song Hyun-soo brushed his cheek with the back of his hand and approached Yoon Joo-ho. He was organizing scripts for another project.
“Does your mind only have the option of showering together? I meant it was okay for me to use the guest bathroom.”
Yoon Joo-ho turned his head to retort, and for a moment, the color drained from his face.
“What is that?”
“What is what?”
Did something get on his face? Seeing his expression contort menacingly, Song Hyun-soo flinched and stepped back.
“That t-shirt. Where did you find it?”
“Find it? It was in the dresser drawer.”
“Take it off.”
“What?”
“Take it off.”
“Why… why are you suddenly like this?”
Yoon Joo-ho grabbed the hem of the t-shirt and pulled it up forcefully. Caught off guard by his sudden action, Song Hyun-soo didn’t even have time to guess the reason. As the t-shirt came off over his head, Yoon Joo-ho clutched it and strode into the walk-in closet.
What is he doing?
Watching his retreating back, Song Hyun-soo, standing bewildered with his upper body bare, suddenly felt goosebumps.
Lip gloss, half-used perfume, sunglasses, an old t-shirt…
He instinctively covered his lower face with his hand.
There was no other explanation than that these were traces left by someone from Yoon Joo-ho’s past.
Returning to the bedroom, Yoon Joo-ho held a new t-shirt in his hand.
“Wear this.”
“…”
Dropping his gaze to his feet, Song Hyun-soo accepted it. He stood there for a moment, then walked past Yoon Joo-ho into the walk-in closet.
He casually placed the new t-shirt Yoon Joo-ho had brought on top of a showcase-style dresser where accessories and sunglasses were displayed like in a boutique. Then, he stood by the corner of the dresser in the center of the walk-in closet for a long time.
The shock from being hit so hard and so suddenly was too great to fully comprehend.
Looking around aimlessly like someone whose task had been taken away, Song Hyun-soo suddenly moved quickly.
He picked up his own clothes that he had worn, not the ones Yoon Joo-ho had given him. He put on the faded gray t-shirt and cotton pants one by one, then his socks. As he reached for the orange padding jumper hanging on the hanger, tears welled up.
Even when he learned about Yoon Joo-ho’s serious past while working a part-time job practicing scripts, he hadn’t been this affected. He was surprised that Yoon Joo-ho had experienced true love, but he wasn’t hurt. He hadn’t even realized he liked him yet.
The night he brought Monroe back, seeing him sleeping and shedding tears, begging him not to leave, he had felt pain, but not like this.
When they argued in the car before his business trip to Paris… even when he heard harsh, definitive rejection, he had only thought it was because Yoon Joo-ho was clumsy with love.
He hadn’t known what it meant to stay by his side, aware of someone still living in his heart, or the extent of that pain.
The past was already cleanly organized in my mind, but the great Yoon Joo-ho is still keeping someone’s belongings? And he’s throwing a fit because I wore a t-shirt left by that person? That’s absurd.
There was only one reason.
It’s not a finished past. To Yoon Joo-ho, that person is still precious, even now.
More than me…
As he pulled the padding off the hanger and turned his head, he caught sight of his reflection in the large full-length mirror.
You idiot. You didn’t even know that, and you came rolling in here, thinking he seemed a little worried about you? — He cursed himself, clenching his teeth to hold back tears.
He returned to the bedroom, dragging the orange padding in one hand. Yoon Joo-ho was sitting with his legs stretched out, leaning against the headboard. He was still wearing only a towel around his waist.
“What is it?”
Yoon Joo-ho frowned, looking at Song Hyun-soo’s attire.
“I’ll just go home today.”
“Why all of a sudden?”
His reaction, completely unaware of the reason, made Song Hyun-soo laugh bitterly.
The boyfriend’s first love, which I had only heard about through rumors.
The boyfriend’s ‘that person,’ who was said to be incredibly beautiful, brilliant, from a good family, and lacking nothing.
I had been arrogant, thinking that no matter how passionately he loved her before, he loved me now. But facing her in person, I felt miserable.
The feeling of seeing my boyfriend’s eyes tremble at her appearance, even though I was right beside him.
That’s the feeling, and now I’ve lost the desire to make out with you.
“I’m just not in the mood all of a sudden.”
Yoon Joo-ho, pushing himself off the bed, grabbed Song Hyun-soo’s wrist.
“I’ll make you feel like it.”
Yoon Joo-ho rubbed his lips against the inside of Song Hyun-soo’s wrist, pushing up the sleeve as if caressing it. Song Hyun-soo resisted, pushing against his attempt to pull him into an embrace.
“Don’t.”
“I know. I pushed you too hard yesterday, so I’ll restrain myself today.”
Yoon Joo-ho stood up and cupped the back of Song Hyun-soo’s neck with his palm. He twisted his head away, pushing aside the arm that was pulling him in for a kiss.
“I said, don’t.”
This time, Yoon Joo-ho seemed to have a stubborn streak, and with greater force, he pulled Song Hyun-soo’s neck towards him in one swift motion. Their lips met forcefully, crushing each other, and Yoon Joo-ho’s tongue aggressively tried to force its way between his teeth. Pushing against his bare chest with all his might, Song Hyun-soo broke free from his embrace.
“Damn it, don’t do this to me!”
Rejected, Yoon Joo-ho turned his head and ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek. Then, he looked up at Song Hyun-soo with a sideways glance.
“Then who should I do it with?”
“I don’t know about that. I… don’t know her face or her name.”
He said, glaring at Yoon Joo-ho with tear-filled, bloodshot eyes.