#208

[Finally! Thank you for saving me. I am…]

“Cooperate with me, as you promised.”

[Pardon? I think you’re mistaken; I am not a Record. I am ‘Codex.’ You seem to have misunderstood because you possess the Blessing of Records, but I have never met you…]

Click.

Codex fell silent the moment he confirmed the ‘eye’ inside the reliquary.

The bookmark carefully traced Fabio’s eyes.

[…Regression. I see. I understand. Athanas. What would you like me to do?]

“I need to find out the details of Fabio’s past movements.”

Why did he come to believe that Order would not protect him? What was the true identity of those arms? How did he acquire such a confused and unstable Divinity Status? And how did his right eye get injured?

[I also do not know about the events that occurred before I received my name.]

Athanas began to trace Fabio’s oldest footsteps.

‘Marcello Teres’ had brought Fabio here.

And what happened then?

[…I smell blood here.]

The 4th basement floor.

Athanas stopped walking.

Books were scattered across the floor.

Athanas slowly traced the bloodstains remaining on the wall.

It seemed someone had leaned against the wall to keep their head from hitting it. Bloodstains had been layered over that spot several times.

Athanas felt a slight wave of dizziness.

These dried bloodstains would not disappear even if he used Regression.

[I will read what happened.]

Marcello Teres was under a ‘Distortion’ that made him mistake the 4th basement floor for his own study.

He believed he had rescued Fabio to a safe place.

Why had Reyes Floren summoned the two of them to the 4th basement floor?

The ‘Record’ of the 4th basement floor revealed that Reyes had left a gift for Fabio.

‘…Did he choose death of his own accord?’

Since it was said that the Watched Ones return to life even after death, it wasn’t particularly surprising.

The gift was a Sacred Relic of Distortion that only Fabio could use. It was clearly a trap, but it was a situation where he could not leave without using it.

After much deliberation, Fabio broke the Distortion cast upon Marcello Teres.

And that choice led to…

[Fabio fainted from the pain of both eyes being crushed. Because his left eye was made of the adult of ledea, it regenerated several times. The terrible and wicked man pressed his knee into Fabio’s chest as he convulsed in pain… Aagh! Stop! I’m tearing!]

Athanas’s hands turned white.

With every sentence read, it felt as if someone were driving an awl into his heart. He had to close the book several times in the middle to avoid breaking Codex.

Did I feel nothing while Fabio was enduring such pain?

‘…Why did the Lord…’

Why did He prevent me from staying by Fabio’s side?

To be used as the Lord’s tool is the ultimate glory.

But, but, but…

‘…Stop.’

Athanas stopped his thoughts.

Those who have sinned must be condemned.

He would drive a stake coated in resin into the eyes of the one who caused Fabio pain. He would set it ablaze, making them feel the agony of their brain burning away.

Athanas grit his teeth and turned the page.

Fabio had accepted Marcello Teres, who begged for forgiveness, as a Vassal. In a dying situation, it was the only way to survive without believing in an Evil God, but…

‘…He surely must have wanted to save that man as well.’

Fabio had once told Athanas.

That if he had the power, he would have tried to save him somehow.

Of course, he added that since nothing was more important than his own life, he would never defend him, but Athanas did not believe those words.

He was a man who threw himself into danger to save the ‘Heretic Butcher,’ someone he had barely spoken to.

How far would he sacrifice himself for someone he described as being like a younger brother?

‘A younger brother.’

It was a word that truly did not suit Marcello Teres.

Fabio believed that he could somehow turn that man around. Athanas recalled the sight of Fabio desperately clinging to that soul, which had received Heavenly Punishment twice, so that it would not fall into hell.

How could he just leave that be?

He wanted to give the advice to “learn how to give up” right back to Fabio.

[Something that had failed to take human form crawled desperately. Fabio restored it back to Callister and comforted it kindly. Fabio thought of Andrea. Since he now possessed the Sacred Relic of Distortion, he would be able to save him from the wicked Evil God.]

‘…He should have thought about protecting himself first.’

Athanas thought as he walked the path Fabio had walked.

Despite hating pain so much.

How could he reach out to save the very things that harmed him?

Athanas did not understand Fabio.

Fabio might not remember, but Andrea had nearly killed him. Even if that event had been erased, the fact that he used ‘Distortion’ on him as naturally as breathing remained unchanged. Callister had chopped off Fabio’s arm with an axe in the basement of the Main Hall. Not to mention Marcello Teres…

Then, it suddenly occurred to him that he was not much different.

‘…Fabio.’

Perhaps the largest share of Fabio’s nightmares belonged to Athanas.

His left eye was currently inside Athanas’s reliquary. Even if Fabio had requested it, the horror of it did not change.

At that time, Fabio’s consciousness was blurred due to excessive bleeding, but he had clearly recognized Athanas.

A gaze filled with desperation, longing, and a hint of relief. Eyes that believed Athanas had come to save him.

Athanas had to gouge those eyes out.

‘And I had to act as if it never happened.’

All of it had to be ‘a hallucination seen while in a state of delirium.’

To achieve that, Athanas could not meet Fabio until the following morning. Because if Athanas had fallen asleep knowing nothing, that is how he would have acted.

But Athanas simply could not fall asleep.

What have I done? Was this truly the best choice?

If he fell asleep, he could not turn back time.

He wanted to confirm that Fabio was safe and find some peace of mind. He felt that only then could he sleep soundly.

It didn’t matter if Fabio feared him and pushed him away. If he used Regression, that event would vanish. At least seeing that expression would snap him out of it. Yes, let’s use Regression. Then he would become exhausted enough to collapse into a dreamless sleep. He thought he had had such a foolish thought. If he had seen Fabio trembling and screaming, he might have gone insane on the spot.

But Fabio did not push away the suddenly appearing Athanas. Instead, he reached out and embraced him. He held onto Athanas as he tried to leave and begged him to stay.

Since it was a dream anyway, he told him to stay. Since he appeared the moment he thought he missed him, this moment must be a dream.

Hearing those words, Athanas thought.

Did I actually turn back and return to my room? Perhaps it had already been a dream from the moment he agonized over his inability to sleep.

Athanas tried to regain his senses.

Whether it was a dream or reality, he had to use Regression. He had to make this moment as if it never happened.

However, at the words that followed, Athanas’s will collapsed helplessly.

‘Athanas, I’m afraid of losing you.’

It felt as if he were swept away by a giant tsunami.

Athanas wanted to fall to his knees and confess that he felt the same.

That at some point, his greatest nightmare had become losing him.

…And when he came to his senses, Fabio was fast asleep in his arms.

Athanas gazed at Fabio’s peacefully sleeping face in the darkness for a long time. Until he was certain that all of this was reality.

Though it was the dark dawn where no light reached, it felt as if the whole world was sparkling.

A star was shining in his chest.

It was a star so bright that the original guiding star was no longer visible.

If Athanas had been a slightly more devout believer, he would have offered a prayer of repentance, asking to be kept from making selfish choices because of the emotions filling his heart. Asking to take this feeling away so that he could serve Order entirely.

It was a joy so intense it was frightening.

‘…Is there anyone who could give that up?’

Death would be less frightening.

Athanas thought as he passed through the main gate of the orphanage.

The ‘Prayers’ in the Apostle’s Hall. There was no way Fabio had ordered them to pray. The more people prayed, the heavier the sin of claiming to be a god became. It was likely Nyapoleon’s doing.

Even if a heretical god were born in the middle of the Capital Church, they would only end up dead.

Athanas’s conviction grew stronger.

Fabio must abandon his Divinity.

To Fabio, who possessed such indiscriminate kindness, Divinity was nothing more than a Curse.