By Zephyria 
After visiting all the general wards where children from toddlers to infants were hospitalized, Min-hyeok stopped by the intensive care unit, where patients requiring concentrated treatment were located. Of course, he could not enter the rooms, so he looked inside from the outside while listening in detail about the children’s conditions, their current treatment status, and future management plans.
Following that, he had a meeting with the parents of children who were showing a good recovery thanks to the full support of the Imperial Family. Children who were in good enough condition attended the meeting with their parents. Meeting the young children, aged zero to five, who had become much healthier was both rewarding and heartbreaking.
It would have been better if they had been healthy and not sick; the traces of illness and the numerous IV needles were more than enough to shake one’s heart. From the full sponsorship of the Imperial Family to an audience with the Emperor, the selection criteria were not easy, but since the process was satisfactory for everyone, he hoped they would all be selected.
After meeting all the children, Min-hyeok moved to meet a child who was granted a special private audience. It wasn’t a sterile room, but it was a place where access was restricted. Min-hyeok approached the parents who were waiting for him, holding a four-year-old girl.
Wounds were visible across the body of the child, who suffered from a rare skin disease. Despite the bandages wrapped around her arms and body and her struggle against inflammation, the child’s expression was brighter than expected. In Min-hyeok’s memory, the inflammation in her body had decreased significantly and her condition looked better than when he had visited last autumn. It seemed the new treatment and medication suited her body.
“Ju-a, your health has improved a lot. Your expression is much brighter, too. You’ll be even better next time, right?”
“I greet Your Majesty. Thank you for remembering me, Your Majesty. Fortunately, the treatment fits very well, so the inflammation isn’t spreading and is healing nicely. Thank you so much.”
“I didn’t do much. I am relieved that the child is enduring it so well.”
Because the doctors had advised him not to have contact with the children as much as possible, even though he had sanitized and worn sterile clothing, Min-hyeok only lightly stroked the child’s head. Even a tiny scratch would sting and hurt; how difficult must it be for a young body to endure? Hae-joo must have been this pained back then…
As the image of a blood-soaked Hae-joo suddenly came to mind, Min-hyeok shook his head slightly to snap back to his senses. Whether it was his conscience or guilt, his heart began to race. These symptoms had worsened after he had seen Hae-joo. He felt it would be best to pull himself together so as not to disrupt the schedule.
However, today, the child’s mother looked exceptionally tired and pale compared to the child. When the child, who had been clinging to the mother, moved to the father and began to whimper, the mother showed a look of apology.
“Nursing someone is a very difficult task. It is even more so when it is a child. The mother must be healthy to be able to care for the child.”
At Min-hyeok’s concerned words, the child’s parents gave a bashful smile.
“Ju-a’s mother hasn’t been feeling well lately. Her pheromone levels are low, and even though she’s receiving pheromone injections for Omegas, it seems she needs a bit more time.”
“Where and how is she hurting… Is it not that her strength has waned because nursing is so exhausting?”
“It’s not that… Actually, she had a miscarriage not long ago. Because she was looking after Ju-a, she couldn’t recover sufficiently, so I think her health is worse. Thank you for your concern, Your Majesty.”
The child’s father looked at her pityingly and cautiously revealed the situation to Min-hyeok. A miscarriage? At that sensitive word, a slight frown creased Min-hyeok’s brow.
“Oh dear, that is truly unfortunate. I heard that one must rest sufficiently depending on the gestational age…”
“It was just over four weeks, so it was diagnosed as an early miscarriage. They were twins. A grain of rice is a bit larger, and when we held a sesame seed up to the ultrasound photo, it fit perfectly. When we showed that joke to Ju-a, she was so happy that she was getting younger siblings… I felt even more sorry for Ju-a.”
“…A sesame seed?”
As an unexpected word came from an unexpected place, Min-hyeok’s face stiffened. A sesame seed? Wait, where had he heard this? Min-hyeok reacted sensitively to a word that was otherwise unremarkable. And soon, Han-bin’s voice, screaming and wailing at Hae-joo’s house, came vividly to mind.
‘His body is ruined due to the aftereffects of the miscarriage and pheromone abnormalities, and he is mentally devastated. He has reached a point where he cannot even eat a single sesame seed. You probably don’t even know what that means.’
Ah… was it then? At the time, he couldn’t interrupt the extremely agitated Han-bin, so he hadn’t been able to ask the meaning of a single sesame seed. Han-bin’s other words had flown like daggers into his chest, preventing him from paying attention to that part.
So, the ‘sesame seed’ that Hae-joo had apparently not been able to eat a single grain of until now was likely a metaphor for the child. He remembered that Hae-joo had also been around five weeks. As Min-hyeok’s face rapidly hardened, the child’s parents looked at each other and checked Min-hyeok’s complexion, and even the security team leader approached.
Realizing that his condition was bad enough for the security guard to approach, Min-hyeok hurriedly composed himself and signaled to the security team leader that he was fine. Ju-a’s parents were extremely flustered, realizing that the Emperor’s face had turned pale during their conversation.
“Your Majesty, are you perhaps tired…?”
“We were similar to those twin children.”
Min-hyeok’s voice, speaking out of the blue, was strangely lifeless. However, the child’s parents soon realized the meaning of Min-hyeok’s words, confessed in a small voice. There was a time when the country was in an uproar over the news of the Grand Imperial Concubine’s miscarriage. Realizing this, the couple stopped moving and became deathly silent.
“The gestational age was similar. I suppose the fetal size at that time really is the size of a sesame seed. That is why the Grand Imperial Concubine still cannot eat that one sesame seed…”
Whether Min-hyeok knew he was pouring these words out or not, his expression was like that of someone making a confession. These were words he had not brought up to the Queen Dowager or Sang-seon. To reveal such an intensely personal matter to strangers was an act driven entirely by emotion.
He had never been like this before, and he hadn’t known the aftermath of meeting Hae-joo would be this great. Yet, strangely, he didn’t want to stop talking. Min-hyeok wondered if he had gone mad. Even though he knew he would surely regret it, he couldn’t stop.
“The articles said you had separated from the Grand Imperial Concubine user…”
The wife nudged her husband’s arm with her elbow to shut him up as he murmured in surprise after hearing Min-hyeok’s story.
“Your Majesty. Does it still weigh heavily on your heart?”
At the woman’s question, Min-hyeok, regaining some consciousness, couldn’t answer and gave a bitter smile. It was a smile that looked awkward to anyone.
“Your Majesty. Omegas, especially male Omegas, find it harder to give birth and have a higher probability of miscarriage than female Omegas. They carry a child while bearing a very great risk. I do not know the situation at the time, but he must have been very heartbroken.”
“…Yes. I think so.”
‘Yes, I think so’? Even after saying it, it felt utterly ridiculous. His chest felt so tight that he couldn’t even answer properly. He hadn’t been able to properly comfort Hae-joo, who had miscarried. Hae-joo was more important than the child. That was why he had wanted Hae-joo to recover quickly and shake it off and stand up again.
But was that truly for Hae-joo’s sake? No. It was for Min-hyeok himself. He did it because he wanted Hae-joo to recover quickly so they could get along well again. He thought he might have said something cruel to Hae-joo back then—that they could just have another child. At the time, he had blurted that out thinking it was comfort.
It was pathetic how little he had known. No matter how young he was, he had done a terrible thing to Hae-joo, who had been pregnant with his child and miscarried, and to his child, who was small but had clearly existed. Why was he realizing this now, here?
“A miscarriage is no one’s fault. Especially not the fault of the Omega who carried the child. I hope no one feels guilt. The Grand Imperial Concubine user must have felt it even more. If Your Majesty had comforted him then, wouldn’t that have been a solace?”
There was no way he had received solace. Because he hadn’t been able to fully comfort Hae-joo’s heart. He thought he was comforting him in his own way at the time, but it hadn’t even reached the Grand Imperial Concubine. No, that wasn’t comfort.
Min-hyeok couldn’t open his mouth, unable to judge whether he had even comforted Hae-joo. He couldn’t be this foolish. Sensing something from the atmosphere of embarrassment surrounding Min-hyeok, the child’s mother called him again.
“If there is something you were unable to express, why not express your feelings now, Your Majesty? There are things that are not conveyed unless you speak clearly and express them. Do not assume he will know even if you don’t speak; try expressing it. It probably isn’t too late.”
Perhaps because she was someone who had given birth to and raised a child, she possessed a sense of maturity despite not being very old. Was it really not too late even now? Even if it were late, facing his shortcomings now and showing his apology might be a comfort to Hae-joo. His thoughts became so numerous they almost caused an overload, but he felt it would be better to put them into action rather than just thinking.
Min-hyeok nodded at her words with a faint smile. He had clearly come to comfort and encourage the baby and the parents, but he ended up being the one comforted. He hadn’t realized that advice received from a stranger could be such a solace.