By Zephyria 
I felt Hyun-wook flinch at his meaningful words. I got the feeling he was intentionally being vague—whether he meant he already knew me or that he’d seen me so often he recognized me. However, the person who spoke remained composed.
“Since I’m the only one watching, it’s only natural that you don’t know me.”
Having been attacked from all sides lately, I had become guarded, and because Hyun-wook was on edge, I had become sensitive as well. But what was the point of being prickly with a stranger? I just focused on eating my ice cream.
“By the way, who are you waiting for?”
This question was so out of the blue that I frowned slightly and observed him. Why is he asking this? Normally, people don’t ask such things of someone they just happen to pass by.
“Why do you ask?”
“I noticed you always come out at the same time and look around. But you always have the look of someone waiting for someone, so I was curious. Whether you met them or not. I couldn’t watch you constantly because I had to go to the academy. But don’t meet people who don’t keep their promises. There’s really no need for that.”
Waiting for someone? Is that how I looked to him? He was right. Because I was waiting. I hadn’t realized that my feelings and desperation were visible to others.
“I don’t know where you saw me, but you have a keen eye.”
“Just occasionally. At first, I thought you just liked sitting at the convenience store and eating something, but then it seemed like you were waiting for someone. I guess I’m being a bit nosy. I don’t know who it is, but don’t wait too long. It becomes a habit.”
I simply burst into laughter. I wouldn’t mind if it became a habit, and I wouldn’t mind waiting for a long, long time. As long as I had the certainty that we could meet, I could keep waiting in that spot forever. That was nothing.
“It’s okay if they’re late. It’s okay if it becomes a habit. I’d be happy as long as they just come.”
“What? Who are you really waiting for? Why are you so kind? Who is it that makes you just wait like that?”
A hollow laugh escaped me at his tone, which sounded as if he were asking if I was a pushover. Who am I waiting for? The sun is setting again. It’s all because of that burning red sunset that I become so emotional. Because the sunset looks so beautiful and warm. Because it’s the same sunset I always used to watch with Seo-joo.
“My younger brother.”
“Your brother? You have a brother?”
I could feel Hyun-wook’s bewilderment without even looking. The way he tried to stop me with his hand seemed to be a warning not to speak of such things carelessly. Hyun-wook must have been extremely flustered. Since our first meeting, we had avoided mentioning Seo-joo, as if we had made a pact. Like some kind of tacit agreement.
“Where did your brother go that you keep waiting like this? Wouldn’t it be faster to try contacting him through other means? The police station or other agencies….”
“I want to contact him, but I don’t know how.”
He fell silent, perhaps realizing that the conversation was not a typical one. Then, he observed me, his face hidden beneath his hat. Indeed, the subject was heavy for a conversation with a stranger.
Strangely, I began to open up. Words I hadn’t been able to tell anyone until now wouldn’t stop once they started flowing.
“You don’t even know when he’s coming?”
Unlike his initial bold and blunt voice, the question was now very cautious.
“I’m not sure. When he’ll come. Actually, I don’t even know if he will come or not. Since I don’t know anything about whether we can meet, waiting is the only thing I can do.”
“What will you do if you wait this hard and he doesn’t come? Wouldn’t it be too painful to wait and have him not show up?”
“No. Painful? Then I can just wait for the rest of my life. I might not be able to meet him in this lifetime, but every day of waiting will still be fluttering. Because I’m waiting for someone I miss.”
“How is that fluttering? It should just be painful because you miss them.”
It felt like I was rambling to a stranger, but that was exactly why I could do it. Perhaps because he was someone I’d see once and never again, I wanted to say everything I couldn’t tell people I knew.
This person seemed to have a high capacity for empathy. Instead of just dismissing it as a rambling vent, he tried to understand every single emotion.
“No. If I can’t meet him today, I’ll meet him tomorrow, or next year. If I close my eyes after waiting like that, I’ll meet him in the next life. I live my whole life with that kind of anticipation, so why wouldn’t it be fluttering?”
And then if I close my eyes, in the next life, definitely…. I wondered why the sunset looked so blurry, and then I realized I was about to burst into tears again. It was certain that I had become more prone to tears since coming here. Are all Omegas like this?
Then again, just thinking of Seo-joo brings tears to my eyes, so it would be stranger if I didn’t cry after talking about it. Still, showing such a tearful side to a stranger was quite embarrassing. But he didn’t look at me strangely.
“I asked something I shouldn’t have. I hope you definitely get to meet your brother.”
“Since you say that, I feel like I will.”
With eyes filled with tears, I smiled at him. I couldn’t see his face to check his expression, but his lips were twitching as if he had something to say. As he stood up, he gripped and shook the remaining ice cream stick.
“This is for the ice cream you gave me. I enjoyed it so much today that I’ll definitely pay you back next time we meet. Usually, my mom doesn’t let me eat it even when I want to. And of course, what we talked about today is a secret.”
“I’d appreciate that. As long as you enjoyed the ice cream, that’s enough. Goodbye.”
He hesitated several times, turning back to look at me repeatedly. I felt sorry, wondering if I had burdened him, but my heart felt relieved after pouring out stories I couldn’t tell anyone. A sort of ‘bamboo forest’ effect, so to speak.
“User… Hae-joo.”
“Yeah. I know. I have no excuse if I get scolded. I shouldn’t just say these things to strangers.”
“…Shall we go to the palace now? It is time for you to return.”
These were words I hadn’t uttered once since Seo-joo died and I came here. I didn’t know I would say the words I had pressed so deeply into my heart in this way. I should probably change the time I go outside. The sunset keeps making me emotional.
That night, I had a dream. It was a very simple dream of eating rice with pollack stew together with my dad and Seo-joo in our old house. In the dream, I was so excited that I said:
‘Are we all alive? Then what do we tell the people who came to our funerals?’
‘Just tell them we’re alive again, what’s there to worry about?’
‘Is that so? Dad, then are we living in this house again?’
‘Yes, Hae-joo. Now the three of us will live together with Seo-joo. There’s so much to do. I’m glad none of the three of us are sick anymore.’
It was a feast of completely nonsensical things. But I smiled the whole time. I was so happy that, even though I knew it was a dream, I didn’t want to wake up. Because once I wake up, once I rise… I have to endure another day among people who do not love me.
And perhaps because I had such a dream, I spent the night tossing and turning with a fever, unable to sleep. I didn’t have a major illness, but an Omega’s body was certainly sensitive and weak. I repeatedly fell in and out of sleep to the point where I didn’t know how much I had actually slept.
While I was waiting for the fever to drop after taking medicine and receiving an IV, I heard the urgent sound of heel clicks. It was the sound of someone with a wide stride running toward me. Who is it? Hyun-wook should be in the living room, and it’s late at night, so there’s no one who should be coming? Who is it?
“Hae-joo! Hae-joo, are you okay?”
This voice…. My eyes, which wouldn’t open due to the high fever, trembled as I barely managed to open them. Because my focus was blurred, I couldn’t see at once, so I closed and opened my eyes several times. The only person on my side in this place had finally arrived.
“Hyung? Is it you, Hyung?”
“Yes! It’s me, Hyung is here. The Emperor said I could come see you as soon as I arrived, so I came straight away. Why do you have such a fever again?”
A large hand repeatedly touched my forehead and cheeks. Only then could I see my brother’s face clearly. He was wearing a very splendid military uniform, and his appearance clearly showed he had come in a hurry. His face was so full of worry that my glad smile felt almost embarrassing.
Soon, with urgent eyes, he began to examine my arms, legs, and body thoroughly. He must have heard something from someone. It was certain he came knowing that my grandfather had hit me.
“I’m okay now. The Emperor helped me.”
“Why didn’t you tell me! You should have told me if something like that happened! Do you know with what heart I looked after you…. I….”
“Because you were having a harder time, Hyung. I’m okay now. The Emperor said he would continue to help me in the future.”
I gripped my brother’s hand, emphasizing with a cracking voice that I was okay now. Having met Hyun-wook and now my brother, I felt like I wasn’t in pain at all. I was so happy. If only Seo-joo were here, it would be perfect.
“Hyung…. Please find Seo-joo. Can’t you please find our Seo-joo?”
My brother nodded repeatedly while stroking my hair. With my cheeks flushed from the fever, I managed a strained smile as I watched his reaction.
“Yes. Hyung will find him. So don’t worry and try to sleep.”
As expected, it seems illnesses heal better when someone who makes you feel at ease is by your side; I felt like I was about to die, but now that Hyung is here, I feel sleepy and the fever seems to be dropping. I wish we could just stay together from now on.
∗ ∗ ∗
In the darkest dawn before sunrise, Min-hyeok carefully entered the Grand Imperial Concubine’s Imperial Pavilion. Having heard that the fever was high again, he couldn’t concentrate on his work. He heard that Han-bin had seen Hae-joo and fallen asleep in the next room.
However, he hadn’t expected Kang Hyun-wook to be in Hae-joo’s drawing room. He told him to provide security, not to live attached to him…. Min-hyeok passed Hyun-wook with indifferent eyes and entered the room where Hae-joo was sleeping.
In the room he entered carefully, the scent of Hae-joo’s pheromones was faintly spreading. Perhaps because he was sick, the pheromones had leaked out. The fragrant scent of acacia tickled and stimulated Min-hyeok’s cells.
As he slowly approached the bed to check Hae-joo’s face, Min-hyeok’s expression was full of distress. His lips were dry from the fever, showing a slight trace of blood, and his cheeks and forehead were reddish. Why does he get fevers so often?
He placed a cold towel back on the forehead and checked if the IV fluid was flowing well. Then, he moistened a handkerchief with water and placed it on the lips. Perhaps feeling the sudden coldness as a foreign sensation, Hae-joo frowned and flinched.
‘Oh dear.’
He didn’t seem to have woken up, but a powerless hand gripped Min-hyeok’s hand again, just like before. Min-hyeok held Hae-joo’s hand tightly, just as he had then. Then, a small voice flowed from Hae-joo’s lips.
“Find Seo-joo, Hyung, you promised. Please find our Seo-joo….”
Seo-joo? An unfamiliar name he had never heard before came out of Hae-joo’s mouth.