#198

“Fuck.”

[Pandemonium: Fuck just die]

[Pandemonium: Die you fucking piece of shit]

‘…I told him not to answer before I did.’

But since I would have probably started swearing too if I heard that, I didn’t say anything.

[Nyapoleon: My, what a quick response. Do you hate it that much?]

[Nyapoleon: Did you ask ‘Fabio’?]

‘Why is my name coming up here?’

As if I’m crazy enough to tell him to agree to the deal.

First of all, fuck, this is a massive loss on our end.

I wouldn’t mind if he asked to cut off a finger, but if a trait is copied entirely, it’s a problem where every Mother God unit could potentially gain ‘restoration.’

“…Hyung, it’s not you, right?”

Why are you looking at me like that again?

Honestly, I feel a bit insulted.

Did you forget why I tried to quit the game?

“If I had the power to make you do something against your will, I would have stopped you from bitching and whining in the first place.”

“…Is it because you don’t have that power that you aren’t making me? What if I were an NPC who followed your words unconditionally?”

“Then I would have ordered you to commit suicide in a way that leaves no corpse the moment it looked like your chastity was going to be stolen by Mother God. No, I would have taken preventive measures so that it could never happen.”

“Preventive measures?”

“Right now, the Mother God side has something called the Blessing of Mating or whatever, so they can acquire traits just by having reproductive cells. But honestly, male reproductive cells are easy to get.”

“…Easy to get?”

“Easier than eggs. The Blessing of Mating probably comes with several other blessings that aid mating, like heat or pheromones. To avoid falling for that, wouldn’t the surest way be to remove the testicles of all male units in advance?”

“…You mean neutering us?”

“If this were a game.”

Seeing Pandemonium’s expression, I quickly added.

“But this isn’t a game, and you aren’t an NPC.”

“I’m a eunuch….”

I smacked Pandemonium on the back.

“Get a grip. Hey. Do you not know why I’m telling you this? Even if I were some psychopathic efficiency-obsessed gamer who could control you as I pleased, I would have rejected that kind of proposal immediately. So why did that bastard make a proposal that would be 100% rejected?”

“…To make the listener feel like shit?”

“No. He did it to see your reaction and figure out who is the top and who is the bottom between us.”

Pandemonium suddenly wore a blank expression.

“…How do you know that? More importantly, we never decided on that, did we? Of course, I think I’m the top, but….”

“Bullshit. Do you really think you’re the top in this situation?”

“Huh?”

“You idiot. He added a clause that is absolutely unacceptable, but instead of the other party rejecting it immediately, they make a call first? That means the decision-making power lies with the other person. The decision-maker is always the superior. Can’t you even deduce that much?”

Perhaps because he was scolded for being stupid, Pandemonium’s face flushed red.

I let out a deep sigh.

“For now, let’s go with the setting that we’re ignoring him because he’s not worth talking to.”

“Mm-hmm.”

[Nyapoleon: No answer. 🙁 ]

[Nyapoleon: Fine, I’ll be honest. The one I really want to cooperate with is ‘Fabio.’]

[Nyapoleon: Fabio, do you want to mate with me?]

[Pandemonium: Fuck, what did you just say?]

[Pandemonium: This piece of shit wants to die]

[Pandemonium: No. Mating? Let’s do it. I’ll go, so give me your location]

[Pandemonium: I’m going to fucking kill you, so give me the coordinates]

‘…Is he actually stupid?’

“Hey. I told you to ignore him.”

“But this bastard….”

[Nyapoleon: Great! I am currently at the Sanctuary of Egous.]

I paused.

He’s giving away his location this easily?

[Nyapoleon: And also at the Apostle’s Hall, the Pantheon, the Grand Chapel, the 3rd Chapel, the Sanctuary of Ledeia, the Court, and the Inquisition. I am everywhere, so come to whichever place is convenient!]

‘…I knew it.’

The main body definitely isn’t at the places he just listed.

No, even if it is, it probably doesn’t matter.

He would have already made Arrangements for a way to resurrect.

“Answer like this: ‘You say you want to cooperate, but what’s with that attitude? Is it enough to just say what you want? Tell us first what you can offer in return.’”

[Pandemonium: …My body is fucking expensive, so how are you going to pay?]

[Nyapoleon: Anything? Tell me what you want.]

[Pandemonium: You’re the one who should be making the offer.]

[Nyapoleon: Hmm…. Doesn’t the Teres family need an heir? I’ll let you have a child with the ‘Divine Bloodline.’ How about that?]

I furrowed my brow.

‘…He can clone the Divine Bloodline?’

Sperm shouldn’t have organelles.

Of course, it’s not that there are none. There would be some mitochondria in the part that falls off during fertilization, since energy is needed for swimming.

But if you can obtain the ‘Divine Bloodline’ trait with just that, isn’t that fucking broken?

It means if you just produce one top-tier biological data collection unit and seduce only noble men, you could obtain every type of Divine Bloodline.

“He’s boldly saying he’ll take the Divine Bloodline trait too. How is that a reward?”

[Pandemonium: Are you saying you’re going to take Telekinesis now?]

[Nyapoleon: No, I can’t touch the Divine Bloodline trait. You know the Divinity-Organelle Hypothesis, right?]

[Pandemonium: What the fuck is that, you nerd]

[Nyapoleon: …The Divine Bloodline is matrilineal. Maybe with existing methods, but you can’t obtain the Divine Bloodline through the Blessing of Mating. Unfortunately.]

‘…Did he experiment with it?’

“Then how is a child with the Divine Bloodline created?”

[Pandemonium: Then where are you going to get a child with the ‘Divine Bloodline’ from?]

[Nyapoleon: You’ll have to give birth to it yourself]

[Pandemonium: …?]

[Nyapoleon: I mean I’ll get you pregnant 🙂 ]

[Pandemonium: Die fuck]

“Wow, fuck, where is the closest place from here? The 3rd Chapel? Should I go there? I want to rip him apart and kill him right now.”

“Calm down.”

[Nyapoleon: Why are you pouring out insults when I’m offering to give you a Blessing? Do you know how many people want to become a mother? It’s not a Miracle I give to just anyone.]

[Pandemonium: Please die fuck]

[Nyapoleon: Strange. Don’t you need the Telekinesis trait? It’ll be very inconvenient if you lose your traits later by becoming an apostle or something?]

[Pandemonium: Just die, commit suicide]

[Nyapoleon: Ah, you already took it? No wonder only bloodstains were left in the Council Leader’s office.]

‘…What if I hadn’t taken it?’

Was he planning to crunch it bit by bit?

To obtain Telekinesis?

“How many did you farm?”

[Pandemonium: How many did you devour?]

[Nyapoleon: Not many. If someone hadn’t killed all my children, I could have taken more.]

[Nyapoleon: Still, I managed to get quite a few decent units.]

[Nyapoleon: Like the Knight Commander of the Inquisition….]

‘…Casimir.’

Suddenly, I felt dizzy.

Right now, Casimir is….

[Pandemonium: …You ate Casimir?]

[Pandemonium: Answer me]

[Nyapoleon: Correct. Her stats were very high. I didn’t care about other units, but I definitely wanted to take that child.]

“Hyung.”

“Be quiet.”

[Pandemonium: Give her back as the price. I’ll tell you something you’ll be interested in. Let’s trade.]

[Pandemonium: There is no option to refuse for you. If you don’t give her back, I’ll find you and rip your stomach open.]

[Nyapoleon: Oh dear. What to do? If I take Casimir out now, she’ll be a premature baby 🙁 ]

“…Fuck.”

My stomach churned.

I think I understand why Heavenly Punishment is dealt upon heretics.

A disgusting existence like that deserves to be struck by lightning.

‘And yet Order leaves things like that alone….’

Did they waste Heavenly Punishment on my Pandemonium?

[Nyapoleon: Right, these arms.]

[Nyapoleon: Are you really not going to tell me the purpose they were created for?]

[Nyapoleon: Then I’ll just take them and use them as I please?]

[Nyapoleon: Aren’t you curious about how I’ll use them?]

Even though nothing was being typed in the chat window, Nyapoleon kept rambling on his own.

[Nyapoleon: Ledeia has many similarities with Mother, right?]

[Nyapoleon: I don’t know what happened to Ledeia, but it seems the position is currently vacant.]

[Nyapoleon: I thought it was an opportunity to create a new Goddess of Healing!]

[Nyapoleon: Actually, I didn’t know that all the contaminated adults of Ledeia were connected, but I found out thanks to you.]

[Nyapoleon: That means if I seize control of just a part, the whole will follow orders, right?]

[Pandemonium: …Why are you telling me this?]

[Pandemonium: Are you asking me to interfere?]

[Nyapoleon: No, I just thought it was a good idea.]

[Nyapoleon: I wanted to hear your opinion.]

[Nyapoleon: I respect qwerasdf very much.]

‘…Respect?’

[Nyapoleon: To Qwerasdf, who is now ‘Fabio.’]

[Nyapoleon: Someone must become the god of this dark land.]

[Nyapoleon: In that case, wouldn’t it be better for a benevolent mother to become the Main God?]

[Nyapoleon: In a world ruled by a mother, there is no hell. Those who have sinned are reborn after being corrected so that they do not commit such sins again. There is no need for a heaven either. Because the earth is heaven.]

‘Bullshit.’

[Nyapoleon: In the end, we will cooperate. So why should we be at odds now?]

[Pandemonium: Fine. Then hand over the position of Cult Leader to me.]

[Pandemonium: Then I’ll consider cooperating.]

[Pandemonium: You know? Mother God chose me first.]

So it’s only natural to hand it over to me, and you’re nothing more than an inevitable second choice.

I tried to scratch his pride with that, but an unexpected answer came back.

[Nyapoleon: Of course I know. Because the order I received was to find you.]

“What?”

[Nyapoleon: Do you not remember the message Mother left for you?]

[Nyapoleon: ‘My beloved child.’]

[Nyapoleon: ‘No matter who you choose, I will find you.’]

[Nyapoleon: ‘And I will be with you.’]

[Nyapoleon: You are Mother’s firstborn.]

[Nyapoleon: The position of Cult Leader was yours from the beginning.]