By Zephyria 
===
“Humans pride themselves on being rational animals, but in reality, we are perfectly governed by hormones and instincts. Even at this very moment. Many of you seem to be governed by the instinct to sleep; am I mistaken?”
Laughter echoed through the lecture hall at the professor’s words, and a few students who had been face-down on their desks lifted their heads.
Smiling, Eun-won continued to listen to the professor explain the ‘governance of hormones and instincts,’ while his mind remained filled with thoughts of Cha Se-jin, over and over again.
Governance… The word felt heavy, but perhaps it really was governance. Seeing as he couldn’t stop thinking about Cha Se-jin even though his heat cycle had ended.
If it were just a passing thought, it would be one thing, but whenever he pictured Cha Se-jin’s face, tension naturally tightened in his inner thighs. Even though he wasn’t in a distressing situation where he couldn’t control his pheromones, just thinking of Cha Se-jin brought back his voice, then that smile, and then the memory of his touch, making his body itch all over.
…I must be crazy, seriously.
He tried to snap out of it and focus on the lecture, but Cha Se-jin’s voice kept clinging to his ears.
‘Stick out your tongue. That way I can suck it.’
Feeling as if a breath had actually touched him, Eun-won fidgeted with his ear and shook his head.
‘Not gently, but hard?’
The temperature and grip of the large hand that had pulled his ankle, and the sensation of the movements that entered and exited so rapidly they made a wet, squelching sound as their bodies locked together, suddenly overwhelmed him. Clamping his thighs shut, Eun-won let out a long breath, covering his face with both hands. His heated breath blurred against his lips. He missed Cha Se-jin.
* * *
An employee continued the briefing while pointing to complex figures and graphs on the large screen. However, not a single word penetrated the ears of Cha Se-jin, who sat at the head of the table, appearing to listen.
Rolling a fountain pen used for approvals with his long fingers, Cha Se-jin looked down at the supplementary documents.
“…….”
The dense black text didn’t register at all; instead, seeing the stark white margins reminded him of Eun-won’s white, slender ankles—which were, without exaggeration, just as white.
The ankles that had dangled and swayed every time he moved while draped over his shoulder on the bed and at the dining table. Those white, pretty ankles that were pulled down along with the rest of the body whenever he gently wrapped his hand around them and tugged…
‘Executive… Director… ngh…’
The sensation of that soft, smooth skin still lingered on his fingertips. Letting out a short, silent curse, Cha Se-jin gripped the fountain pen tightly, as if gripping Eun-won’s ankle.
“…….”
On the first and second days, they were intoxicated by heat, and while yesterday he was closer to a sober state than the first day, Eun-won’s voice—still flushed with fever, calling his name and clinging to his neck—beat against his ears.
Executive Director, Executive Director; he called him incessantly, and the memory of that face, tearful and worried that he was leaving him behind whenever he merely tossed and turned in bed, made him feel like he was dying. He wanted to be shoved away in the annex, not in this damn conference room filled with grim, stiff people. With Eun-won, of course.
He told himself to focus since he had to finish the meeting, but he simply couldn’t get Eun-won out of his head. He remembered how Eun-won looked at him with embarrassment after waking up, as if ashamed of the erotic things they had done, and the flushed face that would close its eyes tightly and part its lips slightly whenever he brought his face even a little closer, as if he loved kissing.
…Ah, fuck. I’m seriously going crazy.
Cha Se-jin frowned and chewed on a low curse. He wasn’t in a Rut, and it wasn’t time for a Rut to arrive, so he couldn’t understand why he couldn’t calm down.
Of course, he liked sex, but until now, it had always been a momentary pleasure and that was it. He had never been obsessed with a partner. No one had been special, and there was no need for them to be. And even if it felt good for a moment, he had never continued to think about it after it was over. But this time, the feeling itself was different.
What is this? Why is it so different? What exactly is so different, seriously?
Because Eun-won is exceptionally pretty? Because he has a face exactly his type that he’ll never find anywhere else? Or because he discovered that Eun-won’s body is so erotic that he doesn’t know what to do and feels everything intensely wherever he’s touched?
No, it wasn’t just for reasons like that, nor was it a feeling of only that magnitude. While those were certainly part of the reason for this maddening feeling, they clearly weren’t everything.
The arms that clung to him, the hands that carefully held his face in a feverish haze during a kiss, the panting mixed with sobbing, the long moans that flowed when he stopped while crushing the deepest part, those innocent reactions that collapsed helplessly under his touch…
When he thought of those sides of Eun-won, it felt like facing an exam paper where he didn’t know a single answer. The feeling of being unable to even read the questions, not knowing anything so he couldn’t even guess, just spending time in a state of frustration, helplessness, and burning anxiety.
“Executive Director. Executive Director? I have finished the presentation.”
Coming back to his senses, he looked up to find the employee who had finished the presentation staring at him, as he had been lost in thought. At the secretary’s words informing him that the presentation was over, Cha Se-jin straightened his slanted posture, tossed out a few brief words, received an answer, and ended the meeting.
Returning to his room and leaning deep into his chair, Cha Se-jin checked the time. There were still two hours left until Eun-won’s classes ended. Now that the meeting was over, he wanted to go to the school right now, snatch Eun-won, take him home, and melt his entire body with his tongue until he clung to him, sobbing. What kind of face would Eun-won make looking up at him while sober?
Just the thought made the tip of his tongue feel sweet. Slowly rubbing the tip of his tongue against the back of his upper teeth, Cha Se-jin rubbed his face with both hands at the endless train of thoughts. Praying that time—those goddamn two hours—would pass quickly.
* * *
With about an hour left before the final class, Eun-won met Yoon Ji-woon and Jung Woo-min and took a sip of a green grape smoothie. He hadn’t known why he suddenly craved a green grape smoothie when choosing it, but after drinking it, he remembered how he had deliciously drunk a cool, sweet and sour green grape juice while having plenty of sex with Cha Se-jin three days ago. It seemed that taste had been strongly imprinted on his brain, given that he usually didn’t choose green grape flavor.
“Thank you so much for back then. If you guys hadn’t been there, it would have been a real disaster. You must have been really surprised…”
“I’d only heard about it in stories, so I was a bit shocked to see that cycle happen for the first time, but hey, it’s not something you need to look at us with such apology. I didn’t even do much.”
As Yoon Ji-woon looked at Jung Woo-min, Eun-won also looked at Jung Woo-min. Yoon Ji-woon probably knew what relationship he had with Cha Se-jin and wasn’t surprised by his appearance, but Jung Woo-min, faced with the sudden heat cycle and then Cha Se-jin’s appearance, must have been much more shocked. While Eun-won was worrying about how to bring it up, Jung Woo-min smiled and spoke first.
“I haven’t told anyone, and I won’t in the future, so don’t worry.”
“Ah… it’s not that… I’m sorry. You must have been so surprised…”
“I was surprised because someone I’d truly never expect to see in my life appeared, but hey, things happen. From what I saw, I heard you did some kind of arranged marriage; that’s you, right?”
“…Yes.”
“Wow, I had a feeling, but hearing it is still goosebumps. But is it because he’s a chaebol? His scale is huge. We ate our fill of Hanwoo beef with what he gave us for a meal, and there was still so much left that we shared it.”
Seeing Yoon Ji-woon next to him giving two thumbs up and making an exaggerated “Kuuuuh” sound, praising the chaebol hyung as the best, Eun-won let out a small laugh and finally relaxed. Since Cha Se-jin came to the school often, he couldn’t stop rumors from spreading forever, but he hoped it wouldn’t happen this time.
“But Se-jin is seriously impressive. Two posts went up on our college app saying they saw Cha Se-jin at school, but they were taken down shortly after and nothing has been posted since. He’s the one making them take those down, right?”
“Ah… I don’t really know. But he’ll probably look into it if there’s a risk of something like that happening.”
“Still, I feel a bit more relieved now.”
“Why?”
“Because I think that hyung likes you way more than I expected.”
“…Huh?”
At Yoon Ji-woon’s unexpected words, Eun-won’s heart tightened and then released, beating rapidly. Eun-won bit the inside of his lip and waited for his friend’s next words.
“I thought arranged marriages were fake marriages, you know? Like, it’s a marriage, but… you know… it’s not like you do it because you’re dying of love. It’s more about the conditions matching.”
“…….”
“But that day, seeing him rush up the stairs like a movie—bam bam bam!—and carry you out, I thought, ‘Ah, this is the real deal.’ His expression was just like that. A face that was truly worried about you.”
At Yoon Ji-woon’s words, Jung Woo-min, who had taken a large bite of chocolate cake, nodded while waving his fork.
“For me, it was when! When he covered his head with a coat and came out! I was like, ‘What’s this?’ but he did that so others wouldn’t know who it was. We talked about that while eating the meat and said it was seriously badass. We said we should use that move too.”
“Yeah, that was seriously badass. As expected, you only know those things if you’ve done them a lot…”
Yoon Ji-woon, speaking excitedly, realized the moment the words came out that he had made a mistake and checked on Eun-won. On the surface, there was no change in expression, but since he had clearly heard everything, he wouldn’t be feeling great. Scratching his head in apology and embarrassment, Yoon Ji-woon apologized.
“…Sorry.”
“Huh? Ah… no, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it. Where did you eat the meat? That place that opened recently that you said we should go to?”
“Oh! We tried to go there but couldn’t because it was too expensive. Hey, there’s a reason it’s expensive. The meat just melts in your mouth…”
As he naturally shifted the topic, Yoon Ji-woon and Jung Woo-min began to praise and describe the taste of the Hanwoo they had eaten that day in detail.
Whenever it concerned Cha Se-jin, Eun-won found himself riding an emotional rollercoaster over a single word from his friends. He was so happy his heart fluttered at the words that he seemed to like him more than expected, but his mood immediately sank and became gloomy when he heard that such consideration was ingrained in him because he had “done it a lot.” All for the sole reason that it was related to Cha Se-jin.