#44

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

The dorms are changing to two people per room. This might actually be better… The training here is fun, but being alone in the dorm is hard.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

Mom sent me a ton of Korean snacks and side dishes. Half the snacks were stolen, but no one’s interested in the side dishes lol. Idiotsㅋㅋ My mom’s braised quail eggs and shredded squid are amazing, so I’m gonna eat them all by myself~

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

My jersey number is 86. The front office told me to pick from the remaining numbers, and a Korean friend told me that to avoid looking small compared to foreigners, a “plump” number makes your body look bigger than numbers like 7 or 11. Now I like my back number so much that I feel good just seeing 86 whenever I pass by.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

But the funny thing is, the Korean friends who told me that have back numbers 11 and 12 lol. When I played with them, I was 13ㅋㅋ

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

Someone asked a while ago why 86 is in my ID, so here’s the long story ^-^;;

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

It’s fucking cold XX. Cold enough to make me swear. I taught my roommate Korean swear words, and I learned Swedish ones in return. Tusan okssa??ㅋㅋ

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

It’s my birthday, so I had a long video call with my Korean friends for the first time in a while. Seeing them in their school uniforms felt a bit strange. I was wearing that same uniform last year.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

2 years ago

I have to work hard.

Finding Shin Ho-jae’s SNS account was a coincidence.

Curious about an Asian player playing in the CHL*, he had been searching around when he discovered a photo of an ice rink and a pair of uniform pants showing the number 86. It was the account of an 18-year-old Shin Ho-jae.

*Canada Hockey League (Youth)

It was a bit later that he realized he had a past connection with him. Shin Ho-jae was the player he had personally asked his grandfather to sponsor. It happened when Jung-hyun was 15 and Shin Ho-jae was 9.

At the time, Jung-hyun had just transferred into Myeong-jeong and was enjoying generous support and benefits as a prospective heir.

The founding chairman, Kwon Deuk-jeong, had sponsored sports athletes for a long time. Thanks to that, Jung-hyun often enjoyed the luxury of watching sports matches—something he had never seen before—from the VIP seats.

It was his first time seeing a youth ice hockey game. Back then, his grandfather told Jung-hyun that he intended to pick one person from this team to sponsor and told Jung-hyun to choose for himself.

Without much hesitation, he had chosen Shin Ho-jae. His skill was overwhelmingly superior and stood out.

It was a strange twist of fate. To encounter once again in this distant land a player who was playing in Canada on a hockey scholarship thanks to him. A strange sense of superiority and curiosity welled up simultaneously.

Since Jung-hyun’s life in America was incredibly empty and tedious, it was only natural that the time he spent on SNS grew longer.

Creating an account with the ID “86” was also a largely impulsive decision.

A private space with 0 followers and 1 following. There, Jung-hyun began to write replies all by himself.

86 @86_luck_number

(Photo)(Photo)(Photo)(Photo)

Photos I took because I saw 86 while passing by. Two of them are mixed in with other numbers. Ever since I learned it’s someone’s lucky number, I feel happy whenever I find it. I wish you all the luck.

86 @86_luck_number

It’s not that cold where I am yet, but when I checked the weather app, Canada is very cold. I hope you don’t catch a cold. I wish you all the luck.

86 @86_luck_number

Speaking of Swedish swear words, I once heard a German friend at school swearing. When I asked what it meant, it was just “shit.” I guess Korean swear words are the harshest in the world, right? haha

86 @86_luck_number

(Photo)

It’s your birthday. I was in a bad mood today, so I drank a lot and came home, which is why I checked this so late. I rushed outside, but the only place open was the smallest deli, so I picked something that looked most like a cake. It’s just a cheap brownie, but it looks decent with a candle, right? Happy birthday. I wish you all the luck.

Shin Ho-jae probably doesn’t even know this account exists. But that didn’t matter.

As the other rambled and he followed up with replies, it felt as if they were having a conversation with a time lag.

Just that alone brought vitality to his bland daily life. Perhaps this was why people in the past used to be pen pals?

Jung-hyun accessed SNS as soon as he woke up and right before he fell asleep, and he smiled faintly whenever he saw the number 86 on the street. He often took photos of it.

On game days, he became so nervous himself that he kept checking the clock. If the team lost, he felt upset and poured drinks down his throat; if they won, he felt great and would buy drinks for those around him for no reason.

Some told Jung-hyun that if he liked the player that much, he should use his vast wealth. They suggested that if he were lucky, he might actually meet him and go on a date.

However, Jung-hyun hesitated. First, he feared that doing something reckless while in exile might harm his mother in Korea, and second, he was happy enough with this relationship.

Since the earliest memories of his childhood, Jung-hyun had been raised to become a perfect Alpha.

Even if his mother went hungry or wore worn-out clothes, she ensured Jung-hyun had perfect meals every day and dressed him in fine clothes.

The words Jung-hyun heard most from his mother back then were, “You never know when your father might suddenly look for you, so you must always be prepared.”

From the age of five, he had a perfectly fitting suit tailored every year, and if it became even slightly short, the sleeves were added to and remade. If there was even a speck of dirt on Jung-hyun’s shoes, his mother would kneel on the dirt ground herself to wipe the toes.

People around them shook their heads, calling her crazy, but neither his mother nor Jung-hyun cared about such words.

He believed, as his mother said, that one day his wealthy father would come looking for him and his mother. For that moment, he had to become a son his father wouldn’t be ashamed of. A perfect Alpha son.

He had grown up that way for sixteen years.

Because of that, once that goal was stripped away, Jung-hyun was left as nothing.

His father wanted Jung-hyun to have no interest in anything. He had to ensure he was not a threat to the older brother who would become the heir.

Jung-hyun was not allowed to achieve very high grades in school, nor was he allowed to show exceptional talent in anything.

In this distant foreign land, the only things he could do were buy luxury clothes and goods he would never wear, get drunk, and strive not to pay attention to anything—constantly confirming to his family that he was a “useless existence.”

His mother still occasionally asked if there were any signs of manifestation, but when he said there were none at all, her voice would actually sound relieved.

He could understand her. Having finally sat in the position she had longed for her entire life, she would never want to give it up.

He always felt sorry for his mother. The guilt of her dedicating her youth to a child who failed to become an Alpha, and the guilt that he still made her anxious by not becoming one. All those things always weighed heavily on Jung-hyun’s chest.

Shin Ho-jae was the complete opposite of him.

He was a Dominant Alpha who had manifested at a young age, possessed clear goals and talent, and got along very well with his family. He had everything that Jung-hyun wanted but could not have.

Seeing Shin Ho-jae run until his whole body seemed to break during games sometimes sparked a vague sense of jealousy.

If Jung-hyun had only seen the version of Shin Ho-jae shown to the public, his interest might have ended there.

But Jung-hyun knew his account.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

1 year ago

From today, I’m a 2nd division player. I managed to keep my back number too haha. My family was sad they couldn’t celebrate with me. Everything here is great, but being away from my family is hard.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

1 year ago

Working hard isn’t enough. You have to be good.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

6 months ago

I wasn’t in good condition today, so I made some mistakes… I got chewed out by the coach, and on top of that, I heard the crowd shouting racial slurs, which really pissed me off. Man, at times like this, I just want to quit everything and go back to Korea.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

6 months ago

In the end, I was notified that I’m being taken out of the starting lineup for the next game. My teammates comforted me, saying it’s a shame, but inside, they’re probably thinking it’s their chance to shine. I know because I was like that too. When you think of everyone as a competitor, it’s hard to open up.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

6 months ago

I didn’t tell my mom and dad. I don’t want to make them worry for no reason… After hanging up the phone, I cried alone for a bit. I’m depressed.

Surprisingly, Shin Ho-jae was often depressed and felt lonely alone in a strange land. Even someone who seemed perfect had moments of emptiness and loneliness, just like him.

Shin Ho-jae, who has everything I don’t, is just like me.

He didn’t know if it was because his own personality was warped, but thinking that gave him a strange sense of comfort.

86 @86_luck_number

When you live abroad alone for a long time, don’t you sometimes just suddenly feel like crying? On days like that, I shut myself in my room, drink my favorite alcohol, and watch a sad movie. Then I can cry until all the moisture leaves my body. That’s how I find the strength to live through tomorrow. I recommend it. I wish you all the luck.

Jung-hyun loved the fragility he possessed.

He was still a stranger who belonged nowhere, still bound to Myeong-jeong and his mother, but thinking of Shin Ho-jae—who was struggling in the same foreign land yet still living diligently—allowed him to survive another day somehow.

The imbalance in that one-sided yet comfortable relationship occurred shortly thereafter.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

Please recommend some sad movies.

LuckyShin @luck_86_shin

Because today is a day where I want to cry until all the moisture leaves my body. Everyone has days like that, right?

45 – Puck Drop