#11

Though there was no coercion, the child moved with heavy steps, as if being roughly dragged away by Tennessee. Tennessee’s pace was so fast that it was hard to keep up.

He was being considerate all this time. It was even harder because there were many people blocking the view. Tennessee’s back would drift to the edge of their vision just as they were about to catch up, and even when they ran with gritted teeth, he was already further ahead.

He had been consciously slowing his pace for me.

The child thought this while desperately following. With only the goal of keeping up remaining, the child gasped for breath.

As soon as they returned to the hotel, Tennessee roughly threw off his outer coat. The sound felt like a sharp lash, making the child flinch and hunch their shoulders.

Upon entering, Tennessee couldn’t help but scoff at the sight of the letter and banknotes left on his bed. Without even reading it, Tennessee crumpled the letter and gestured. The child approached hesitantly.

They were certainly afraid, but strangely, they didn’t feel that they were in danger. Although it was obvious he was angry, Tennessee didn’t drag them or treat them roughly. It was a distorted kind of trust.

Ah, so this is what it’s like to be scolded. The child realized for the first time. For the first time, even though no physical force was used, they tensed their body and held their breath.

“I taught you how to shoot, didn’t I.”

“…Yes.”

“If you know how to shoot, why didn’t you take it?”

“Because it’s Tennessee’s.”

At the same answer as before, Tennessee pulled out the gun. He forced the trembling hand open and placed the gun in it.

“If something similar happens next time, shoot immediately. If you’re going to run, take everything. Don’t try to leave a good impression by playing ‘yours and mine’ while acting like an idiot.”

The child nodded as if possessed while listening to Tennessee, but then shook their head at the last remark. It was a slight but clear expression of will.

“I don’t want to.”

“Why not? You left it on purpose. If I’d left a wallet, you should have taken all the bills and left. You should have found a place to stay, whether it was a motel or some hiding spot. If kids who looked suspicious approached you, you should have shot them immediately!”

“I don’t want to, I…!”

“Still haven’t come to your senses? What were you planning to do with not even a single dollar? What were you going to do tonight?! Do you know what kids like you do when they have no money? They carry drugs in the back alleys and sell their bodies. If you didn’t want to end up like that, you should have taken it!”

“I would have shot them! If I had a gun, I would have killed them all! I would have killed them without hesitation! But I don’t want Tennessee’s gun…!”

“…What?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry for disappointing you. But it was the first time…”

Unable to speak properly due to the surging sobs, the child managed to hold back the tears.

Tennessee was facing those eyes again, full of that pure longing he had first seen. Even while tense and cornered in a dead-end alley, the child had spoken like that.

That they did not wish to steal from him, that they did not wish to be remembered as a pathetic person who repaid kindness in such a way.

“I needed it too, so I did think about stealing it, but just the thought of it made me feel sorry… No one has ever done this for me. It was comfortable lying there… even though we moved every time, it felt like home. I thought, maybe this is what a home is. Even if it was a hotel, a motel, or a car, it was cozy… I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”

“Get out.”

“…Tennessee.”

Finally, tears welled up in the child’s eyes. The brimming tears flowed down cheeks flushed with red.

“You chose this. I told you to stay here, and you left. It was your choice. Don’t come back.”

“…I was wrong, Tennessee. I’ll listen to you.”

“I won’t say it twice.”

“It felt like home, so I thought it would be better to starve than to steal from the person who gave me that… Tennessee!”

Tennessee grabbed the child and headed for the door. The child desperately called his name.

“Tennessee, Tennessee! Please!”

“Look at yourself. Have some pride.”

The child sobbed. However, the flickering fire did not go out. Biting their lip in desperation, they glared up. Their eyes were full of resentment and sorrow.

The child, who had been helplessly dragged along, suddenly shook off Tennessee’s hand and stood on their own two feet.

“Fine, I’ll go.”

“Good, go.”

“I said I’ll go!”

It was then. Cutting through the child’s plea, which sounded like a shout, came the sound of a knock. The child gasped in surprise, and as both of their gazes turned toward the door, someone knocked on the hotel door again.

Leaving the crying child alone, Tennessee checked the lens.

A person in a hotel uniform was standing there. Behind them were two police officers.

“Damn it.”

With that curse, Tennessee roughly rubbed his head, deciding to just let whatever happen happen. He shoved the gun he had taken out during the argument into a drawer and managed his expression. Then, he opened the door.

“…Yes. What is it?”

They peered into the room with worried eyes. Then, looking back and forth between the miserably crying child and Tennessee, they glared as if looking at the lowest scum on earth. The child’s face was a mess of tear streaks.

“Sorry for the late hour, but we received a report.”

The blue eyes of the child, who had been wailing as if the world were ending, went wide. Gasping for breath, the child looked back and forth between Tennessee and the police to grasp the situation.

The officer’s gaze shifted from the child, whose face was red and still had teardrops clinging to their chin, to Tennessee.

“Excuse me, but what is your relationship?”

“This child is my…”

“My brother.”

The child approached, eyes still brimming with tears, while still gasping for breath from the lingering sobs.

“Brother… Age? May we check your ID?”

“Why?”

As Tennessee went to find his ID, the child asked back with a precocious tone.

“Child, are you hurt anywhere?”

The child shook their head and reached out toward Tennessee. Tennessee picked the child up with one arm. Rubbing their cheek against his broad shoulder to wipe away tears, the child looked at the police.

“Child, it’s okay, just tell us. What happened?”

“Who are you?”

“…That’s no way to talk to a police officer.”

At Tennessee’s nagging, the child turned their cheek away. The police officers seemed bewildered, as the scene was different from what they had imagined.

“We heard a child crying. We thought something bad might be happening. As you know, the world is dangerous these days.”

Just as Tennessee was about to open his mouth to come up with an excuse, the child blurted out.

“I did something wrong, so I got scolded.”

“…He didn’t hurt you?”

The child shook their head. Meanwhile, the way they glared at the police made it seem as if the police were the ones who had done something bad. As if silently protesting not to take their brother away, the child buried their face in Tennessee’s chest.

Hmm. The officer quickly wrote something in a notebook.

“I appreciate your hard work.”

With those words, Tennessee implied that the conversation was over. The child waved goodbye to the awkwardly smiling officer. Tears soaked into Tennessee’s shoulder where the child’s wet cheek touched.

As the door closed and the police officers and hotel staff disappeared, Tennessee sighed. He tried to set down the child, who was clinging to him like melted cheese, but the child tightened their grip.

“Get down.”

“I was wrong.”

“…I said get down.”

“If I get down, I’m going to cry here. I’m going to cry loudly.”

“Go ahead.”

“…”

Having run out of things to say, the child clung tighter. Still, there was an unfounded belief that Tennessee would not harm them.

“Please hold me tight.”

“Why should I do that?”

Tennessee sat in a chair with the child dangling from him. Then, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette.

I hate cigarette smoke… But since they weren’t in a position to complain, the child buried their face deep in Tennessee’s chest to avoid the smoke. However, even after a while, the sound of a lighter was not heard.

Looking up, they saw Tennessee holding an unlit cigarette in his mouth.

“Are you really going to kick me out?”

“You don’t listen.”

“I’ll really listen from now on. I won’t run away.”

“You were sobbing and begging, and suddenly you’ve got your spirit back.”

It was a remark that pricked at their meager pride, but the child did not take the bait.

“I won’t do it again.”

Resting their forehead against Tennessee’s shoulder, the child nudged him with their forehead as if protesting.

If Tennessee had been angry and asked why they ran away, they wouldn’t have been able to do this. If he had shouted and hit them for not listening, maybe. But Tennessee had scolded them for not being able to protect themselves. A strange adult. A person so uniquely strange that it was now becoming familiar.

“Don’t doze off here.”

Cradled in Tennessee’s arms, the child began to nod off. As the tension released, a massive wave of sleep, unlike anything they had ever felt, rushed in.

“…Good grief.”