By Zephyria “Thank you so much today, Ash.”
Koi said, standing on the street with a flushed face. Ashley frowned as he took out the shopping bags containing the several pieces of clothes he had bought from the trunk.
“Are you sure I don’t have to take you all the way home?”
“Yeah, it’s okay. It’s right over there. It’s close.”
Koi hurriedly added.
“It’s a narrow road for a car to enter. It’s better to part here.”
Then he could walk him home together, but Koi never said such a thing. At his insistent refusal, Ashley didn’t push him any further.
I’m not Koi’s boyfriend.
Ashley whispered to himself. He was still just a friend. Not yet. So, he did as Koi wanted for now.
“……Okay.”
Whew.
Koi, who inadvertently let out a sigh of relief, held the heavy shopping bags in both hands and looked up at him. It was already close to midnight, so the surroundings were covered in pitch-black darkness.Time flowed like a dream. Koi went in and out several times, changing clothes each time. Every time Koi came out, Ashley would smooth out his shirt collar or straighten his waistband, patting his neck and waist to fix his appearance. Eventually, he even tried to enter the fitting room to help him change.
But Koi refused that to the very end. His reflection in the fitting room mirror was truly pathetic. He absolutely didn’t want to show that naked body to anyone. Even if that someone was Ashley. No, especially because it was Ashley, he wanted to decline even more. How pathetic would Ashley think he was if he saw his unsightly body, when he had such a great one? He already knew it, but he didn’t want to confirm it in person.
After finishing shopping like that, Ashley bought Koi several outfits for the homecoming party, including a suit, tie, and watch, as well as clothes to wear casually. Koi thought it was too much, but again, he was somehow talked into it by Ashley, and before he knew it, he was in the car heading to a restaurant.
The place Ashley took him to after shopping was an incredibly fancy restaurant, which, after searching online, turned out to be an extremely famous and popular place where reservations were fully booked three months in advance.
The situation was the same there. Koi just stared blankly at the menu, which was written in English and had names that gave him no clue what kind of dishes they were or what ingredients they used. Ashley thoughtfully asked,
“Can I order for you?”
Of course, Koi readily nodded. And he learned that there were many ways to enjoy food besides just the taste. Because he wasn’t very sensitive to taste due to his constitution, he had always thought that most food was pretty much the same, but he was greatly mistaken. It was simply because Koi had only eaten food that was pretty much the same.
The food and things he had only seen in pictures, or didn’t even know existed, made Koi feel excited all over. Among them, the desserts were the most memorable. In fact, because he couldn’t feel the taste sensitively, he had always thought they were mostly similar. He had actually thought that chewing on a shoe sole wouldn’t be much different from chewing on a tough steak.
But macarons were different. The texture was different, the melting sensation was different, and above all, he could taste the sweetness. It was a completely different taste from what he had felt before. Koi realized the meaning of the word “delicious” for the first time.
That wasn’t all. Chocolate and cheesecake were also delicious. Koi was completely immersed in the softness of the cold cake that melted in his mouth. He couldn’t eat all of the course meal that Ashley had ordered, but he ate all of the ice cream and cake that came out as dessert. Seeing this, Ashley called the staff and asked if they could give Koi another dessert, and thanks to that, Koi emptied two plates of dessert with warm coffee.
“I’ll tell them to pay attention to desserts from now on.”
Ashley said with a smile, looking at Koi, who was happy in front of the empty plate. He hardly ate desserts, so Koi had rarely eaten these kinds of sweets at Ashley’s house. But thinking that he didn’t want to bother him with such trouble just because of him, Koi hurriedly refused.
“No, I’ve had enough today. It’s okay.”
“It’s okay for me.”
Ashley said.
“Because it’s what I want to do for you.”
Koi stared blankly at Ashley’s face, who was saying that and smiling from across the table, for a while. Again, his chest tickled and the tips of his fingers tingled. Even though there were so many people in the large restaurant, only Ashley was in his field of vision. It felt like both his eyes, ears, and all his senses were only open to him. What on earth was this feeling?
Koi continued to wonder, but he couldn’t find an answer even when he got home.
“Thanks for the ride, Ash.”
Koi looked up at Ashley and said his thanks. Ashley, who was facing him, was silent for a while before opening his mouth.
“Koi.”
“Yeah.”
As soon as he answered, Ashley smiled.
“Did you have fun today?”
“Yeah, of course, a lot.”
Ashley reached out his hand to Koi, who nodded without hesitation.
Oh.
A large hand touched his cheek. The night air was cold, but only the skin touched by Ashley’s hand felt hot as if it were burning. He held his breath without realizing it. Ashley looked at Koi like that and asked.
“Do you know what that means?”
“……Huh?”
Koi blinked at the unexpected question. Ashley continued to speak in a still gentle voice.
“Koi, think carefully. What did I do for you today, and why did I do it?”
“……”
“If you think about it carefully, you’ll know. You already know the answer.”
The hand that had tickled his skin as if tracing over it gently cupped his cheek. Koi barely managed to breathe in his trembling breath and made a sound as if whispering.
“……Do I?”
“Yeah.”
Ashley nodded.
“The answer is already inside you.”
Suppressing the urge to kiss him, Ashley smiled at him instead. And after saying goodbye to Koi, who was still looking at him with a confused face, he turned around.
Sitting in the driver’s seat and starting the engine, he glanced at the rearview mirror and saw Koi still watching Ashley’s side. Ashley turned away from himself, who wanted to get out of the car again, hug him, and shower him with kisses, and instead hurriedly left the spot.
Confess.
He thought as he drove down the empty street at an unnecessarily high speed. And he set that day as the homecoming party. He would pick up Koi and go to the party together. They would dance and drink the bad punch bowl. When the atmosphere was right, he would take Koi to the tree-lined path behind the school. He would say there. That the one I like is you.
Until now, his relationships with other girlfriends had always started naturally and ended naturally. There was no saying “Let’s date first,” and even though they said they liked each other, he had never experienced such a burning longing and heart-pounding feeling. But this time it was different. He was going to confess to Koi and beg him to go out with him.
Then Koi would.
The image of Koi’s face, looking down at him with a flushed face, came to mind. He would flap his ears diligently and not know what to do. And would he say to me.
I like you too, he would say.
His heart felt like it was going to explode just imagining it. Ashley let out a groan-like moan.
Koi, please realize it soon.
The face of Koi, who was looking up at him with a confused expression, came back to life. Ashley prayed earnestly with a hot sigh.
Let me hug you and kiss you soon.
*
Fortunately, Father hadn’t come home yet when he rushed home. Koi carefully entered the darkened Motorhome and turned on the light inside. As the dim interior came into view, he first looked for a place to hide the luggage he had brought. The Motorhome was so cramped that there was no suitable place to put things.
He had no choice but to take out the old, torn clothing box that he had placed under the low bed frame and put the shopping bag in its place instead. When he covered the front of it with the clothing box again, it protruded out suspiciously, but it was okay. Father was always drunk and didn’t properly look around the house. He didn’t notice at all whether the luggage had decreased or increased.
Koi roughly finished organizing and then sighed and quickly washed his body. He carefully folded the clothes he had worn and hid them tightly with his other clothes, then put on his usual old shirt and hole-filled training pants and lay down on the bed.
After the silence came, he relived one by one what he had experienced today. No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn’t believe it was real.
Maybe I was just dreaming until just now.
But even if he turned his head a little, his clothing box that was sticking out of the bed came into view, and it told him that everything that had happened today was all true.
Koi took a big sigh to soothe his overwhelming heart and then turned to his side. His heart started pounding again. How could there be such a day?
It felt like the cold and sweet sensation of the dessert was still left in his mouth. He closed his eyes and recalled the memory, and soon he naturally came up with a question.
Why did Ashley do that to me today?