By Zephyria “That’s impossible!”
Ashley paused at Koi’s reaction, who immediately denied it with a serious face. He was inwardly shaken because he hadn’t expected such a strong rejection.
“…Why?”
The voice that came out after a pause was different from usual, but Koi didn’t notice at all and shook his head repeatedly.
“It can’t be. That’s, well, that friend is a man. My friend is also a man. They’re both men, so how can he like him?”
Koi, who had given a reasonably textbook answer, closed his mouth. He thought Ashley would agree with him now, but he was wrong. Ashley opened his mouth.
“I guess the person he happened to fall for is a man.”
“Uh…”
Koi was speechless at the completely unexpected answer. He looked at Ashley’s expression with some hope, but there was no sign of a joke at all. Rather, Koi was thrown into confusion by his overly serious face.
I didn’t expect Ashley to react like this. What should I do? What should I say? Should I say Ash is right? No, that’s not it. There must be something, something, something.
Koi fidgeted and hurriedly spoke.
“He’s not an Omega or an Alpha either. We’re, no, they’re both Beta.”
Koi, who had hurriedly corrected himself, looked around anxiously. He wasn’t caught, was he?
Ashley just looked down at him silently. There was no sign of disgust or surprise at all. As he was inwardly feeling uneasy, Ashley opened his mouth.
“Why is that a problem?”
“What?”
Koi was flustered and gaped at the unexpected words.
“No, they’re both Beta. If one side is Omega or Alpha, it might be possible, but they’re Beta, so it’s weird.”
“So why is that weird?”
Ashley continued to press. Koi, who was speechless, was stuttering, and he continued to speak.
“What’s the reason why it’s okay if they’re Omega or Alpha, but not if they’re Beta? Is it because Omega or Alpha can have children? So you can only like someone if you can reproduce? What’s so great about that Pheromone, going crazy over it and having relationships is just instinct. Is that really sincerely liking the other person? You sleep with anyone when you’re in Heat Cycle, and that’s natural and okay, but liking the same man is weird if you’re not Alpha or Omega.”
No.
Koi only thought of one thing amidst being stunned by Ashley’s words. This is ridiculous. That can’t be.
Ashley suddenly took a step forward. Koi was startled and quickly stepped back, and Ashley stopped in his place and opened his mouth.
“Koi.”
He continued.
“I don’t think that’s weird at all.”
Ashley was looking at Koi with a more serious face than ever. There was even a hint of desperation in his eyes. Even though there was no reason to be.
“Traits aren’t important. Liking someone is something that happens very naturally…”
“I’m, I’m going to be late for class.”
Ashley tried to persuade Koi again in a serious tone, but Koi hurriedly cut him off.
“Koi!”
Ashley called him, but Koi didn’t stop. He immediately turned around and ran towards the building where his class was, and he kept thinking the same thing.
No, these feelings are not okay.
Ashley is just being kind because he thinks it’s someone else’s problem. He wouldn’t even imagine it’s him.
And think about it, how could someone like me like Ashley Miller.
Omega or Beta, the issue of traits comes after that. The biggest problem is that I’m Corner Niles. So this time Ashley is wrong. Koi is definitely not liking Ashley with those feelings. He just admires and envies him. That was all. It could never be more than that.
Never, ever.
*
Ashley watched Koi’s back as he ran away with all his might. He must be running with his breath catching in his throat, but even so, he could catch up in just a few steps.
But instead of grabbing Koi, Ashley moved his feet slowly. Thinking back on Koi’s reaction just now, he had to rethink what to do in the future.
I didn’t know he would deny it so strongly.
Ashley regretted that he had taken Koi too lightly. He always smiles and says he likes me, so I expected him to confess willingly if I just made him realize his feelings, but I was completely wrong.
A deep wrinkle formed on Ashley’s forehead as he recalled Koi’s face, which had turned pale in an instant. For some reason, Koi’s wall was higher and more solid than he thought. It would take much more thought to get him to overcome it and admit his feelings.
A child passing by greeted Ashley, but he ignored him and passed by. He only had one thought in his head right now.
I need to change my approach.
*
Haaa.
Koi, who was sitting alone in the cafeteria doing his homework, inadvertently let out a long sigh. His head was even hurting because he had been tense all day. Fortunately, Ashley had been acting the same as usual since then. Koi, who had been nervous that he might bring up the conversation he had cut off earlier, was exhausted by the time the last class ended.
But it didn’t end there. He still had skating practice left. Koi had planned to wait in the cafeteria and do his homework as usual while Ashley was training, but he couldn’t concentrate today.
In the end, he was startled by the pre-set alarm and hurriedly packed his things and went outside. He was going to find his bike and ride it to where Ashley had parked his car and wait for him, but he ran into an unexpected face on the way.
“Oh, Koi.”
Bill, who had finished his evening training and came outside, greeted him first. It wasn’t just Bill. Everyone, including the regulars on the ice hockey team, were pouring out. It seemed like training had ended a little early today. Koi stopped, looking for Ashley with his eyes, and Bill and his group approached and spoke to him.
“What are you doing here at this hour? Homework?”
“Huh? Uh, yeah.”
It wasn’t wrong, so he nodded absentmindedly. Another guy immediately chimed in.
“Did you do Teacher Martinez’s homework? Man, isn’t there too much?”
“That teacher always gives a lot. He thinks we only do his homework.”
“Isn’t this a matter we should report to the Human Rights Commission?”
He couldn’t even join in as they were talking among themselves, so he just watched, and then, the face he had been waiting for suddenly appeared in his sight.
“Ash.”
Koi couldn’t help but smile, and Bill, who had turned around following Koi’s gaze, said, “Oh.”
“Why are you so late today? What were you doing?”
Ashley, who lightly hit the back of Bill’s head, who was grinning, asked.
“What are you guys doing here? Why are you all gathered here instead of going home?”
Come to think of it, all the other guys were gone. Koi was startled when he realized that only the regulars on the team, who always hung out together, were left. It must have been quite a while already.
Another guy spoke to Ashley instead of Bill.
“We saw Koi was leaving just now, so we were talking to him.”
“Koi stayed behind and did his homework until now. Amazing, right?”
It was when he was smiling shyly, listening to the noisy and harmless words pouring out, that Bill suddenly spoke to Koi.
“Koi, you’re coming too, right? To Ash’s party.”
“Uh…”
Koi blinked at the sudden topic, and Bill smiled playfully with his freckled face. As if it was natural for Koi to be among them. Koi was happy with that smile and was about to open his mouth to answer when Ashley interrupted before he could say anything.
“Koi can’t come, he always works part-time on weekends. Right?”
“Uh…”Koi was momentarily speechless. He was right. Instead of practicing skating during the week, he had to watch the store all day from morning to evening on weekends.
Everyone’s eyes were on him. Faced with gazes that seemed to be waiting for an answer, Koi hesitated and nodded.
“Y-yeah… you’re right, I can’t.”
“Okay? Then let’s go. Bye, Koi. See ya.”
No sooner had Koi finished speaking than Ashley said his goodbyes. Again, before Koi could react, he turned away first. The other guys also said their goodbyes and turned around.
“Bye, Koi.”
“Have a good weekend.”
“See ya!”
Koi just stood there blankly, only answering with “Oh, yeah, you too,” to the various greetings. Ashley and the other kids left Koi behind, looking at their phones, laughing, and talking amongst themselves as they walked away. Left alone to watch them go, Koi suddenly felt a prickling sensation in his nose and hurriedly took a deep breath.
It’s okay, I was going to say I couldn’t go anyway.
It was a relief that Ashley refused for him in advance. It’s because I was hesitating and didn’t answer properly. I’ll be sure to speak clearly next time.
“Hoo…”
He deliberately inhaled and exhaled deeply, making a sound. Left all alone, Koi stood there for a while without moving. There was no one around. In the suffocating silence, Koi barely managed to recall.
He’s gone, Ash is gone too.
He didn’t even get to ask what was going to happen with today’s skate practice. He’d stayed behind for that reason, but of course, he could guess the reason.
He didn’t want anyone to find out he was spending time alone with me.
Ashley clearly wanted to keep it a secret. It was obvious since the other guys in the group didn’t know anything about it. He’s kind to Koi, but he’d be ashamed if the other kids found out he was close to him.
It’s a relief I didn’t say we were going to practice skating at Ash’s house.
His eyes grew warm and his nose tingled for no reason. He gripped the bicycle handlebars with both hands and walked with heavy steps, sniffing. His eyes quickly became watery.
Koi wiped his eyes with the hand that wasn’t holding the handlebars. It was really strange to cry over something like this. Why does my heart hurt so much?
It’s just because I was told not to come to the party.
Koi suddenly realized. Is my heart aching like this because I wasn’t allowed to go to the party, or because Ash is ashamed of me? It’s both right and wrong. There was a clearer reason for him.
Ash left me.
He left me alone.
That’s when it happened.
“Koi!”