#05

“What the hell are you doing?”

“…….”

“I said, what the hell are you doing!”

Uncle shot up and approached Seon-jae. Even though he was shorter than Seon-jae, his height was nearly 180 cm, and his large build changed the atmosphere in an instant as he approached without hesitation. Preparing himself to be hit, Seon-jae closed his eyes, but instead of a slap, Uncle grabbed his chin.

“What’s this about?”

His head was turned.

“I got scratched.”

“Was it an accident?”

“Yes.”

Soon, the hand was released. His chin felt numb.

Eyes filled with anger glared at Seon-jae. Seon-jae did not look away. This time, it was Uncle who averted his gaze first.

“Tsk. What the hell is wrong with you young people these days?”

“I’ll be more careful.”

“What do you think of that Director Choi guy?”

Uncle changed the subject.

Knowing what he was talking about, Seon-jae did not ask back. Uncle was the one who had been tailing him and eavesdropping, yet he still asked who he suspected in this manner. He probably did the same with other executives.

“Well, I think we need to wait and see a bit longer. Director Choi’s performance has been poor lately, but he doesn’t seem like the type to betray the CEO.”

Seon-jae offered a vague but plausible answer.

Uncle nodded.

“Right. He does have that side to him.”

Realizing that Lee Hyun-joon was missing, he asked, as if he had been concerned from the start.

“The vice president missed the meeting again. I think it’s the first time he’s missed two weeks in a row.”

Uncle only frowned in response.

“Just go out.”

“If the vice president keeps this up, there might be some backlash regarding the mole-catching. As you know, these days…”

“I said go out.”

“Yes.”

He meant he didn’t want to hear it.

Seon-jae left the meeting room with a crooked smile.

He was not pleased with how the company was running. It was true that management had become difficult this year, but that didn’t mean they were going bankrupt. For one, the work Seon-jae was doing was still thriving, and although the lending business was not as good as before, it was not performing poorly enough to be worried about.

Only the construction industry was causing trouble, and since that was due to Uncle’s own judgment error, it was understandable that he felt his pride was hurt. The ambitious new business he had challenged himself with was also struggling. Still, Uncle took the sluggishness of the construction industry very seriously, even though it was not his main business. It was more unstable than ever, and suspicion was growing.

In a few days, it would be something that had nothing to do with Seon-jae, but he was unnecessarily concerned because it was a place he had been a part of for a lifetime.

“Get a grip, uncle.”

He scolded himself in a fairly loud voice.

Now was not the time to worry about others. Finding peace of mind these days was extremely difficult.

Seon-jae was like a still life painting of sunflowers hanging on the wall. After sitting for a moment, he would find that two or three hours had passed in the blink of an eye. He was already used to leaving work late, and it was common for him to stay until midnight. If he was working, no one would say anything. Sometimes, he would sit there blankly without even turning on the lights.

Then he would doze off, and when he fell asleep, he would find himself standing in the flowerbed of that two-story house. The beginning was always the same, but the end was different every time. Recently, he had even seen a couple hanging from a noose that he had never met before. The couple swayed their legs and spun around. It wasn’t particularly a scary dream, but he woke up drenched in cold sweat.

Days like yesterday, when he was overflowing with motivation, only happened once or twice a week. That was not enough. Moreover, in the rush to get things done, he made unexpected mistakes. They were minor mistakes that only Seon-jae knew about, but there was no guarantee that small mistakes wouldn’t grow. He struggled not to ruin what was already well-prepared every minute and every second.

In the afternoon, Uncle called for him. Seon-jae, as usual, was dazed for a moment before finally getting up. He could tidy himself up, but his eyes looked completely lifeless. He put in some eye drops and did a few jumping jacks. He slapped his cheeks a few times.

As he entered the president’s office, the first thing he saw was Lee Hyun-joon sitting on the sofa. He smirked at Seon-jae and then turned his gaze toward his father.

“What happened to that land?”

“What land are you talking about?”

“Are you asking because you don’t know?”

He truly didn’t know what land Uncle was referring to.

“The burial site for my father.”

Lee Hyun-joon sneered.

Damn it. I completely forgot.

It made him laugh in disbelief.

“Wow, look at you getting all worked up. Why? Are you thrilled to talk about a burial site? Do you want my father to die soon?”

Lee Hyun-joon was angrily rambling without any point.

“Shut up.”

Uncle scolded his son with disappointment.

Seon-jae seized the opportunity to act brazenly, as if he had been planning to speak.

“Talking about apartments with a land-rich person is pointless. He has no debts and no guarantees. The income from a small building is quite decent. I’m currently checking the market prices for decent commercial properties in the downtown area, so I’m thinking of shaking things up again based on that price.”

Before Uncle could respond, Lee Hyun-joon interrupted.

“What do you mean checking? Dad, just do what you were doing. There are plenty of strong guys around. If you send a few of them to swing some knives, you’ll have a signed contract within a week. Why drag it out?”

“I told you to be quiet.”

“No, what I mean is—”

Uncle glared at Lee Hyun-joon with fierce eyes.

The lazy Lee Hyun-joon licked his lips and adjusted his posture.

“You stayed up all night at the company yesterday, right?”

“Yes. It’s a VIP matter, so I’m trying to finish it as quickly as possible.”

“Right. Take care of your health while you’re at it. If you collapse, no one will be able to handle your work.”

He was not worried about Seon-jae; he was worried about the potential gap that Seon-jae’s absence could create. It wasn’t just a day or two, but as the time to leave approached, it felt unpleasant. His insides were boiling.

“Yes. I will keep that in mind.”

He barely managed to suppress the tone that was about to come out crooked.

“But that wound.”

Uncle pointed to Seon-jae’s forehead with his finger.

“Go to the pharmacy or something.”

“Yes.”

He answered well, but he had completely forgotten about the fact that he had a wound.

He had just looked in the mirror a moment ago; how could he not know?

He couldn’t remember how he had gotten the wound on his forehead. It felt as if someone had carved that scene out of his mind.

While he was thinking about the wound, it seemed Uncle had continued talking. He thought he heard Lee Hyun-joon’s voice too. But the sounds that actually reached his ears were completely absent. It was eerily quiet, as if he were submerged in water.

“…Seon-jae! Hey, you bastard! Are you deaf? Why aren’t you answering?”

When he turned around, he saw Lee Hyun-joon standing and shouting loudly.

“Don’t shout. I’m not deaf.”

Seon-jae calmly replied while digging in his ears, but his palms were damp. He wondered if he had actually dozed off while standing, and he felt a fear that he hadn’t even been aware of being in a room full of people.

Uncle, already squinting his small eyes, observed Seon-jae.

“Money?”

He asked without any context.

“It’s fine.”

When Uncle asked, “Money?”, it always meant, “Isn’t there a shortage of money?” and this time was no exception.

“See? I told you that guy is getting paid too much. That’s why he’s lost his discipline.”

It was funny that a guy who had never even been to the military was talking about discipline, and Seon-jae snickered. Lee Hyun-joon was about to open his mouth in frustration, but Uncle stopped him.

“Director, Seon-jae.”

“Yes.”

“Do you have any worries these days?”

“No.”

“Then why do you look like that?”

“What do you mean?”

“You, you. You’re different from usual.”

“What’s different? I don’t know.”

Feigning ignorance, Uncle seemed to have nothing else to pick on, so he fell silent. However, he was a perceptive person, so he wouldn’t be unaware of Seon-jae’s change. His heart was greatly disturbed by anxiety. If he stayed here for just a few more minutes, everything would be exposed.

Just then, his cell phone vibrated.

“I’m sorry. I have to take this call.”

He nodded and left the president’s office. His legs were trembling.

He passed the secretary’s office and dashed down the emergency stairs. The phone vibrated insistently, but he didn’t answer. As soon as he reached the ground floor, he threw up everything inside him. Tears welled up in his eyes from the sheer physiological reaction. He gasped for breath.

I’m going crazy.

It was the limit. He thought he couldn’t endure it any longer.

Amidst the stench that pierced his nose, Seon-jae suddenly thought of a waterfall. He wanted to go to that majestic and grand place. He wanted to fall.

* * *

Using the excuse of staying up all night, Seon-jae left work earlier than usual and headed to Jeong Dabang.

“Why does your face look like that?”

Madam Jeong asked with concern.

“I had an iced Americano.”

“I see. You don’t want to talk, do you?”

As he felt the cool air from the air conditioner and the aroma of coffee, he felt a bit more alive.

Madam Jeong brought Seon-jae’s coffee and her own and placed them on the table.

“You’ve got a scratch on your pretty face. How did you get hurt?”

“This? I don’t even remember.”

Seon-jae said jokingly as he gulped down his coffee.

“Wait a minute. Let’s put some ointment on it.”

Madam Jeong went to the counter and brought back some ointment and a bandage.

“It’s fine. It looks like there’s a story behind it, which is nice.”

“Oh, it’s nice, huh? It’ll get infected.”

“It’s okay, sister.”

Seon-jae firmly refused Madam Jeong’s offer to apply the ointment.

“Just tell me a story, a story about living. I like hearing the stories you tell, sister.”

Thinking that he might never come back here again, he already missed this place. He would never miss the various smells and stench from the market, though.

“I can only feel at ease when I do what I want, right? You’re just a kid, after all.”

Madam Jeong glanced at Seon-jae with a gentle smile. She soon shared recent rumors, stories she had personally experienced, and news about someone Seon-jae might know from the past. His heart became calm. The nausea in his stomach settled, and drowsiness began to creep in. But he couldn’t sleep now. There were still things he had to do.