By Zephyria 
I flopped onto the sofa and pressed my wet hair to squeeze out the water. The water dripping from my suit was leaving dark stains on the sofa.
Sigh, I’ve ruined the sofa too. He should really temper his anger; that old man is so eccentric.
“I don’t know why it turned out like this. It would have been so much better for everyone if we just had a nice meal, drank tea pleasantly, and parted ways.”
“That’s enough.”
The Alpha father stopped me with a calmed voice. It seemed his bewildered heart had finally stabilized. You should have stabilized your heart a bit sooner and stabilized Grandfather while you were at it.
“Everyone, go back. I am too exhausted to stand any longer today. Kang-baek, stop by later.”
“Yes, Father.”
“Are you tired, Grandfather? This is why I told you not to get so worked up. You’re at an age where you could pass away in a single stroke, so you should be careful. Shall I help you to your room?”
“Drag that brat out. Everyone, get out of my sight. Useless fools, the lot of you.”
I kept poking at him until the end, and Grandfather, his temper boiling over, glared at me while grinding his teeth. I had taken a few hits, but a thrilling euphoria surged through my body.
“Oh well, Grandfather is tired, so I’ll head out for today and see you again next month. Try to keep your temper in check then, and let’s have a delicious meal together. Okay? Ah, I’ll buy the missing chairs. And if you still can’t find a caregiver by then, let me know. I’ll find one for you.”
“What are you all standing around for? Get out, now!”
At Grandfather’s thunderous roar, everyone was hurriedly pushed out of the house, barely managing to say their goodbyes. Everyone looked dazed, as if a typhoon had just ripped through them. Belatedly, my Alpha father, his expression grim, stared at me for a moment.
“Let’s go home first.”
Go home to do what? Give me a piece of his mind? If Father had one thing to say, I was prepared to say ten. I walked leisurely behind my family, who were hurrying away as if they weren’t even with me.
∞ ∞ ∞
“Don’t go upstairs; everyone sit in the living room.”
Upon arriving home, my Alpha father spoke as if issuing a command. Like students being punished, the eldest brother and his wife, the second brother, and then I sat in a row on the sofa. After telling the employee to bring tea, Father asked them to leave the room for a moment once the tea was ready.
With the employees gone, a brief silence lingered in the living room. After taking a sip of tea, Father set the cup down and looked at me.
“I have a lot to say about your attitude today.”
“I also have a lot I want to hear about today’s events. Who should go first? In honor of the elders, would you like to speak first, Father?”
I had nothing left to lose. I had already decided to unleash the madman inside me, and I had no intention of apologizing for today or pretending it never happened.
“Who taught you to talk back like that when an adult is speaking?”
“It’s also impolite to just ignore an adult when they’re speaking. What is a conversation? A conversation is an exchange of words. A one-sided thing is a speech.”
“You brat!”
“Yes, I am Father’s child. So you don’t need to raise your voice for everyone to hear.”
“Soo-kyung, what is with your tone toward your father? Listening to this from the side is quite a spectacle. No matter how young you are or that you have a mental illness, there is a limit to how much one can endure and watch.”
If he was listening from the side, he should have just kept listening. I don’t know why he felt the need to jump in with such a long line. If you lack tact, it’s better to just keep your mouth shut like the little one; that’s how you stay safe.
“You stay out of this. It’s noisy enough without you joining in.”
“Big brother, please stay out of it. This is a conversation between me and Father. It’s also impolite to interrupt a conversation!”
Having been snapped at by both Father and me, the eldest brother shut his mouth and leaned back.
“Do you realize that the attitude you showed Grandfather today is problematic?”
“I realize that Grandfather’s attitude today was the problem. And not just today, but consistently up until now.”
“Do you have no reflection on your own attitude at all?”
I didn’t know what answer the Alpha father wanted. No, I knew the answer he wanted, but I didn’t know if that answer was right. Did the Alpha father even believe the answer he wanted was the right one?
“Could you tell me what I did wrong? I honestly cannot understand what sin the father who gave birth to me committed to be treated like less than a human, serving Grandfather like a criminal. I cannot understand why it was so wrong for a child to see that and step in to serve instead.”
“You really… seem to be insane.”
Is everyone who thinks differently from him insane? People think differently; that’s why they’re human. Why do parents expect their children to follow their every thought? Would it be fulfilling to raise a child to fit their own mold? Would they feel a sense of accomplishment facing a child with no subjectivity or thoughts of their own?
“Father, you can’t even defy Grandfather’s behavior. You care because he’s your parent. If Father cares for his parents, is it wrong for me to care for mine? Then should I just stand by and watch while Grandfather insults and abuses my parent? Is that the right thing to do?”
“You’re still talking loudly as if you did something right. You don’t even know what you did wrong, and you have no remorse.”
“We’re just going in circles. Yes, I don’t know what I did wrong, so I’m not reflecting. So, if I really did something wrong, Father, please tell me. Tell me with your own mouth that I should have ignored my parent and just watched while Grandfather insulted them.”
Stop beating around the bush and just say it plainly. Shout it out with the Omega father right beside you. What are you so afraid of that you’re struggling to just extract an apology and reflection from me in such vague terms? If there is something to gain, there must be something to lose; why do you try to have it all?
“Why… didn’t you stop him, Father? If you married him for love, you should have stopped Grandfather from acting out like that. For twenty long years, being treated as less than human, standing alone while everyone else ate to serve Grandfather, kneeling to wash his feet. Why did you just watch that happen?”
“Grandfather is old. He is someone who could pass away at any time; is it so wrong to have helped him a little?”
“Are you calling that filial piety now? No, if you want to be filial, you should do it yourself. Why are you trying to be filial through someone else’s hands? Filial piety is a DIY project. That’s a popular saying these days; do you not know it? Why can’t you even pick up a side dish for Grandfather with your own hand, and why don’t you wipe Grandfather’s feet with your own hand? Anyone would think the children were swapped. Put your hand on your heart and tell me. Is what you just said justifiable?”
“You… are really crossing the line. You can’t tell heaven from earth, you have no common sense, and you don’t even recognize your parent.”
“Stop being stubborn. Before talking about manners, etiquette, filial piety, and duty, you should set an example first. The lower stream is only clear if the upper stream is clear; subordinates follow when a demonstration is given. And I’m doing this precisely because I recognize my parent all too well. Otherwise, I would have just shut my mouth and eaten while walking on eggshells.”
He keeps making strange, stubborn arguments. When he’s speechless and has nothing to say, he just says I’m crazy, crossing the line, or unable to reflect. That’s why nothing gets resolved and the conversation just keeps circling. An emotional fight, eventually bringing up age, and talking about respecting elders. This situation was no different.
“I know I spoke harshly to Grandfather today, but that doesn’t mean I reflect on it or regret my actions. Father, if you say parents are more important than a spouse, then it can’t be helped. But try thinking about it from a different perspective. If your parents—if Grandfather—were treated that way somewhere. If Grandfather couldn’t even sit while everyone else ate, standing alone until the meal ended to serve, kneeling to wipe feet… would your heart be at peace thinking that this is ‘duty’?”
“Why are you making such nonsensical arguments!”
“Why is it nonsensical? Do you think it’s impossible? You saw it with your own eyes today. Why? Because Grandfather isn’t someone who should be treated that way? My parent is someone who deserves such treatment, but Father’s parent is someone who shouldn’t be?”
“You… you… you ungrateful brat.”
“You keep saying the same thing. I’m doing this because I do know the debt of gratitude.”
I let out a loud sigh for all to see and slumped my shoulders. You’re the one exhausting me. I don’t know why I’m making such a fuss for someone who has nothing to do with me, and I don’t know why things escalated this much. Regardless, I hope I’m not made any more tired.
“Sister-in-law, be careful. You don’t know if you’ll have to serve my father’s meals and wipe his feet when you get older. How long has it been since you got married? Have you learned much from watching what my father does?”
At my casual remark, the eldest brother and his wife’s faces froze coldly. There is nothing funnier than seeing faces that were excitedly watching until a moment ago suddenly change expression.
“Why? Do you think you won’t have to because you’re the first wife? Do you think you’ll remain a welcomed presence in this house until you die? Who can guarantee that? You never know how life turns out. Since there’s a precedent, who knows if the future will be even more colorful?”
“Stop, stop it.”
The Alpha father cut me off.
“Everyone, go upstairs. Let’s calm down and talk again later.”
“Yes, I’m already calm, but Father seems to need some time. Please call me once you’ve sorted your thoughts.”
The Alpha father left the room with a deep frown, and the eldest brother and his wife glared at me with cold faces before heading to their rooms. Watching the second brother hesitate and slowly lift his backside, I stared at him, wondering what kind of nonsense he was about to spout.
“Crazy bastard.”
“What are you talking about, you idiot?”
Where does he get off swearing? I’m already in a bad mood. As I frowned and swore back, the little one glared once and hurriedly disappeared up to the second floor.
I rubbed my face in exhaustion. The clump of tissue that had been plugging my nose caught on my fingertips. As I pulled it out, the blood-soaked tissue, which had hardened, made a ‘pop’ sound.
“Today was really chaotic,” I said in a tired voice to the remaining Omega father.
“You made the situation too big.”
“Has it really been like this for twenty years?”
“…Yes.”
“What were you thinking?”
“I wonder.”
Sitting with his legs crossed, Father cast his gaze into the air as if recalling a memory from a long time ago. Perhaps it wasn’t a pleasant memory, as a faint wrinkle formed between his straight brows.
“At first… I was too flustered to think, and later, it was sheer stubbornness. Since that man hated me and couldn’t stand the sight of me, I felt I had to endure it just to let him know that I am here. Something like that. Now, it’s like a routine; that man gives me insults, and I leave him with the shame of my existence.”
To have endured such humiliation for twenty years through stubbornness alone—in a way, he was the most tenacious person of all. Yet, I couldn’t stand how pitiful the man before me looked.
“That’s not stubbornness. That’s compliance.”
“Well, perhaps you’re right. Regardless of my inner thoughts, I’m just enduring it.”
“You have to commit something at least as big as what I did today for it to be stubbornness. If you get hit, you have to at least swing your fist at the air; that’s what stubbornness is.”
“I was already impressed. But please, don’t get hit. It breaks my heart.”
“You didn’t even try to stop them.”
“I didn’t expect you to… You’ve been gentle and kind since the moment you were born. Even if your personality changed a bit, you’re still the same. Even though I’ve given you nothing, you’ve always looked only at me, followed only me, and cared for me.”
Well, I didn’t commit those acts with that kind of heart. But I did want to comfort the man before me a little.
“I am worried, though. Grandfather might throw me into a psychiatric hospital, or Father might get angry and cut off my cards.”
“That won’t happen.”
“Why are you so sure?”
“Because I’ve seen it for twenty years. He’s a man who doesn’t cross the line too far. If we decide to go down together, that side has plenty to lose too. Your father said that, but nothing serious will happen. Don’t worry too much. If necessary, I’ll give you another card.”
It’s nice not having to worry about money because I have wealthy parents. Since there’s no chance of going to a mental hospital or having my cards cut, I had no more worries. Feeling lighthearted, I stretched my arms wide.
“I’ll find a chair when I go to Grandfather’s house next month.”
“Thank you.”
Father spoke indifferently, his face devoid of any real concern from the start. Since there was no gratitude in his ‘thank you,’ I pouted.
“And my personality… I think it’ll stay like this. Your comment about me being like a wild youth was spot on. I didn’t know it, but there’s a madman inside me. Don’t worry, I don’t have multiple personalities.”
“…Getting used to you is truly not easy.”
“Still, living like this is easier on the soul than living in silence, pretending to be well-behaved. Father, you don’t express your emotions too much. You’re only hurting yourself that way. You should laugh when you’re happy, cry when you’re sad, and express it when you’re in pain, annoyed, or angry so the people around you understand. Otherwise, they’ll just take advantage of you.”
At first, I wondered if he was really Cha Soo-kyung’s biological parent, if he hated Cha Soo-kyung, or if he had been forced to give birth, but now I was just worried about the person himself.
He was indifferent to everything, lacked emotional expression, and had no assertions of his own. He looked like a person waiting for the day he would grow old and die while watching a river flow quietly.
The only time he had shown intense emotion was when we first met at the hospital, when he tried to pull down my pants to check for missing testicles because I claimed I wasn’t Cha Soo-kyung.
The memory suddenly came back to me, and I laughed. It had been less than a month, but strangely, that event felt like a distant memory.
“Still, I don’t dislike how you are now. Raising your voice, showing your presence, stating your claims. It feels like a dying star is finally emitting light, and that puts me at ease.”
“Worry about yourself first, Father. You look like you’ll pass away before Grandfather does. Does that old man eat something healthy? Why is he so strong? He could probably be an active kickboxer at his age.”
It was meant as an expression of dissatisfaction, but Father let out a small laugh. I quietly stood up and approached Father. His emotionless eyes gazed at me calmly.
“It’s okay. Everything will be fine.”
I knelt and reached out to hug Father around the waist. His body, which had stiffened in surprise at the unexpected action, softened, and Father wrapped his hand around my head.
“Everything will be fine. …Just endure and wait a little longer. In the end, everything will be yours.”
It was difficult to understand the meaning of Father’s words whispered near the crown of my head. However, I did not let go of my embrace. I just wanted to hold and comfort this small man, if only for a moment.
“Father.”
“Yes.”
“Since the situation ended on such a touching note, can I stay out tonight?”
“…….”
Silence served as the answer. Did I trample the emotion too quickly? I felt a slight regret, wondering if I should have dragged it out a bit longer.
“I don’t want to be at home.”
“As long as you’re not going out to die, it’s fine.”
“Why do you say such disappointing things? Even if everyone else in the world dies, I’m going to survive.”
“Then go ahead.”
“Thank you.”
“Take the driver with you.”
Now that’s not right. I tried to argue, but the eyes looking down at me were utterly resolute.
∞ ∞ ∞
The ringing continued for quite a while. Since I had hung up and called back after he didn’t answer once, I was getting a bit anxious. Just before the long ring connected to voicemail, the other party finally picked up.
“I thought you wouldn’t answer this time either.”
—I was showering.
“Are you at the hotel?”
—A moment ago. What brings you to call me?
“If you’re done showering, come down to the first floor and pick me up. My driver says he absolutely cannot leave until he drops me off.”
I said it so he would hear, but Lee Kyung-jin’s back was as resolute as the gaze of my father from a moment ago. He’s always so stubborn at times like this. At my dissatisfied voice, the man’s low laughter flowed.
—If you don’t mind waiting a bit, I’ll just throw on some clothes and come down.
“I’d appreciate it if you hurried. The car is parked as if it’s protesting.”
—Okay, I’ll hurry as much as I can.
I ended the call lightly. Only then did Lee Kyung-jin turn around to look at me.
“Are you sure you don’t need to go to the hospital?”
“Why go to the hospital for this? It was just a little nosebleed; people don’t die from this.”
“The area around your nose is starting to swell.”
“…No. If my nose was broken, it would have hurt a lot. It doesn’t hurt that much. Stop saying ominous things and just let’s go.”
My nasal bone is fine. I’m not going to the hospital. I didn’t want to go anywhere near a hospital, as I had no good memories of them.
“I have no idea how this happened when you just went out for a meal.”
“I agree. I went to eat with a light heart, and I’m still dazed by the disaster that befell me.”
In truth, I had done it while prepared to be hit, but I held my tongue, fearing that Lee Kyung-jin’s favorable gaze would change if I said that.
He had been horrified to see the state I was in when I left my grandfather’s house, and he had been at a loss, worrying about me the entire time, even expressing anger toward the person who had done this to me.
He looked bewildered when he found out the perpetrator was my grandfather, but his anger didn’t seem to subside. He even displayed impressive deductive reasoning, asking if the Italian towel he had bought me had caused the problem. I actually felt a bit stung by that part.
“If you feel any pain, you must go to the hospital, even if it’s late. No, just contact me and I’ll come immediately.”
“I’m really okay.”
“I can’t trust you at all when you say that with a face that swollen.”
Was it really swollen enough for him to say that? I leaned forward to look at my face in the rearview mirror and gasped, seeing the bridge of my nose twice as swollen as it had been when I left.
“What the fuck. Why does my face look like this?”
“That’s why I’m worried.”
“I-I’m fine. It doesn’t hurt.”
Lee Kyung-jin cast a distrustful glance at me as I stammered. Even I wouldn’t believe any words coming from someone with a face like this.
“…I’ll go to the hospital if it hurts.”
“You must contact me.”
I spoke in a tone of half-resignation, and Lee Kyung-jin urged me again as if trying to get a firm promise. I’m not a child; I can go to the hospital on my own.
As I rubbed my cheek with my hand, I let out a small groan when I accidentally brushed my nose. Lee Kyung-jin’s gaze flew toward me as if to say ‘See?’, and as I turned my head away, pretending not to notice, I spotted Kwon Yi-kang emerging from the hotel entrance.
“I’m going now. I’ve been granted permission to stay out, so Mr. Lee, you can go home. I’ll contact you when I leave tomorrow, so get some good rest until then.”
“Still, please contact me if anything happens.”
“I know. I’m going.”
I hopped out of the car and skipped toward Kwon Yi-kang, who was scanning the surroundings. Kwon Yi-kang, who had been looking around to see where the car was parked, smiled at my approach, but then frowned as he looked closely at my face.
“Your face…”
“Stop. This isn’t something to talk about briefly here; I’ll pour it all out once we go up even if you don’t ask, so let’s just go up first. I’m incredibly embarrassed right now.”